gay bitches assemble

Marvel Cinematic Universe The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
F/F
M/M
G
gay bitches assemble
author
Summary
the gang are gearing up for their first day back at school after summer. chaos is inevitable.(completely out of canon - none of them have superpowers etc - so some of the characters might seem ooc, but this is just my take on them outwith canon!)
Note
usernames:steve: america's asstony: tony stankrhodey: roadiewanda: witch bitchsam: big birdpeter: spiderlingclint: arrow but betternatasha: roma-nothor: thunderstruckloki: lowkeyhela: hellcarol: og avengermaria: rambobruce: s m a s hmetallica: buckyharley: harley davidsonscott: ant boistephen: strange man
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Chapter 3

thursday, 3:51 pm

private messages between sam and bucky

bucky: yo can u go on call rn?

sam: yeet not as if i have anything else to do since u left lmao

bucky: lol im still outside so it might be a bit noisy

sam: no worries

bucky: calling u now <3

 

The FaceTime call comes through a few seconds later, and Sam is greeted by Bucky's phone pointed at the pavement.

"Have you not even left my block yet?" Sam asks. He hears Bucky laugh and watches as the camera flips to reveal his face. There's a bulge in the neck of his black hoodie, and it looks... fluffy? He has this mischievous glint in his eyes, one Sam is all too used to, and he's immediately suspicious. "What have you done, Buck?"

The fluffy thing pokes its head out of its hiding place, and Bucky's smile grows. "Guess what I found?" He asks.

"Is that a cat?"

"Yes! It's a kitten. I found it on the side of the road next to an empty box. I think it was in the box and then knocked it over and got out." The cat paws at Bucky's neck, and his face softens as he scrunches his nose up. It's adorable, and Sam thinks his heart might melt from the sight.

"Dude, where are you?"

"Still on your street," Bucky says, distracted momentarily by the cat. He focuses on the screen again, smiling. "I can come back to yours if you want? I need to decide on a name and you're way better at naming things than me."

"Yeah, go ahead. So you're keeping it?"

Bucky is walking now, securing the kitten with one hand against his chest, and shifting the phone so he can see Sam with his other. "Yeah. The box was all soggy and I think the kitten's mother was dead next to it."

"Did you check?" 

"I tried stroking her but the kitten kept jumping on my hand every time I tried to touch her. It was wailing, almost, like it knew its mom was dead already."

"That's so sad," Sam sighs, and Bucky nods solemnly. A quiet meow can be heard over the tinny speakers of Sam's phone, and they both laugh as the top of the kitten's forehead pushes against the underneath of Bucky's chin, trying to get its head out from underneath the cotton of Bucky's hoodie.

"I'm at your building. Let me in before I break the door down."

"Please don't. My mom would kill me."

"Tell Sandra I would never."

"She knows. I think she loves you more than my sister."

"But not more than you?" Bucky smiles, knowingly. Sam smirks back, smugly, as he buzzes him in. Bucky pushes the door open then stops to steady the kitten, who is currently trying to reach his left arm through his hoodie sleeve.

"Course not. I'm her favourite."

Bucky rolls his eyes fondly at this. "Yeah, sure. I think I've confused it with my prosthetic. It's nibbling at the metal."

"Oh my God," Sam laughs. "I'll get you at the elevator, okay?"

"See you soon."

"See you."

He ends the call and makes his way to the elevator to meet Bucky and the kitten. He's buzzing with excitement; Sam loves cats and will take every opportunity provided to pet one - he's been known to dip out of conversations to kneel down and pet a kitten, and has even run onto the road to stop a cat from being hit by a car. Bucky maintains that the car was far enough away that the cat would have gotten away easily and Sam shouldn't have been so stupid, but secretly they both know Bucky would have done the same, had Sam not.

Bucky steps out of the elevator, but he isn't wearing his hoodie now - he's taken it off and is carrying it in his right arm. His prosthetic is in clear sight because of the t-shirt he's wearing, which he normally would hate, but this is just Sam. Sam's been there through everything. And, of course, his family have seen Bucky's prosthetic before. He's there at least three times a week, if not more. The cat pops its head out from underneath the bundle of black fabric, making Sam smile. Bucky leans in to kiss him chastely and lets Sam pick the cat up. Its white fur makes a stark contrast against the dark colours of their surroundings.

"It's like she's glowing," Sam remarks, softly, as they walk back into his flat. He brushes a thumb over the kitten's cheek, and it nuzzles into the touch. He moves his hand, and she follows it, which makes Bucky laugh again.

"It likes you." Sam sets the cat down on his bed, and it makes its way towards Bucky again, climbing onto his lap and pawing at the prosthetic. 

"Do you have a name yet?" Sam asks.

Bucky shakes his head. "I'm not sure if it's a boy or a girl. Which doesn't matter. I figured I could take it to the vet and they could tell me there."

"Did you forget my sister studies vet medicine?"

"Holy shit, yeah. I forgot." He pets the cat again, then looks at Sam, expectantly. "Well, go get her then!"

Sam shakes his head fondly. "So demanding. You're lucky she's home." He exits the room for a second, leaving Bucky to play with the cat. It nibbles at his fingers again before going back to the prosthetic. Sarah enters, takes one look at the cat and swoops in to steal it. 

"What a cutie! Look at this beautiful little furball. Where did you find her?"

"How do you know it's a girl?" Bucky asks, brow scrunched in confusion. 

"I looked?" Sarah replies, mirroring Bucky's confusion. Sam, who is standing in the doorframe, snorts. 

"You didn't even look?"

"It didn't occur to me!"

"Well, that makes naming her easier," Sarah replies. "So where did you find her?"

"At the end of your street," Bucky starts, before explaining the situation again. 

"What about Alpine?" Sam asks, moving towards where Sarah is standing to tickle the cat under her chin. "You found her on Alpine Street. It's pretty fitting."

"I was thinking Snowball or Snowflake, because of her coat." Sarah contributes. Bucky looks at the cat for a second as she squirms in Sarah's arms, thinking. 

Eventually, he says "I think I like Alpine better." Sarah rolls her eyes but smiles nonetheless. 

"Of course you never listen to the vet."

"I don't think vets hold the official authority of cat naming, Sarah," Sam teases. 

"Haha, you're so funny," Sarah deadpans. "You should probably take her to a walk-in clinic or something if you want to keep her. She'll need to be immunised and they might even neuter her."

"I can't afford that," Bucky says. "Not on my shitty cinema job salary." 

"I volunteer at a walk-in clinic that does those kinds of procedures for free."

"Really?"

"Yeah. All you need is some kind of ID."

"Would a driver's licence work?"

"Should do."

"So long as it's not fake," Sam chimes in, and Bucky throws a pillow at him but misses. Sam picks it up and hurls it back, hitting him square in the chest. They laugh as the kitten - Alpine - launches herself onto the pillow. 

"Is it open right now?"

"Yeah, come on. I'll take you."

 

thursday, 5:14 pm

gay bitches assemble

metallica: gUYS YOU'LL NEVER GUESS WHAT HAPPENED

spiderling: WHAT

witch bitch: spill the tea sis

strange man: what have you done now bucky

big bird: no seriously y'all want to hear this

america's ass: lmao of course sam was involved this can't be good

metallica: take that back steve or meet me behind the 7/11 i will throw hands

harley davidson: BUCKY TELL US PETER IS JUMPING AROUND MY BEDROOM HE'S SO NERVOUS

roma-no: aww peter ur so cute

roma-no: but yeah @metallica tell us coward

big bird: buckyandalpine.png

Sam sends a picture of Bucky holding Alpine above his head, pressing his nose to Alpine's and smiling.

metallica: I FOUND A CAT ON SAM'S STREET AND WE'RE TAKING HER TO THE WALK-IN CLINIC THAT SARAH VOLUNTEERS AT SO THAT SHE CAN GET IMMUNISED AND MAYBE NEUTERED HER NAME IS ALPINE AND SHE IS THE LOVE OF MY LIFE

spiderling: AHSJDJGGH OH YMGO D

spiderling: BUCKY U BETTER BRING UR KITTEN TO SCHOOL OR IM GONNA FIGHT U SHSJKAFHHGKHG

big bird: @metallica ahem

metallica: sorry sam ur the true love of my life

arrow but better: *gags*

tony stank: *gags*

lowkey: *gags*

hell: *gags*

america's ass: ew

roma-no: awww

big bird: smh y'all are just bitter

big bird: except nat and petey

harley davidson: wow guess ill die

metallica: u too harley ur the biggest sambucky stan xoxo

big bird: ^^

arrow but better: wow y'all have a ship name???

arrow but better: thanks I hate it

big bird: ly2 clint u big baby xxxxx

metallica: anyways we're at the clinic now gtg 

spiderling: bring ur cat to school or there will be trouble barnes

harley davidson: peter u couldn't hurt a fly

spiderling: yes I could >:(((

big bird: uh huh

metallica: dw petey if i don't bring her to school i'll let u come to my house

spiderling: smh fine

spiderling: she's so cute i love her

roma-no: rt

rambo: im late but oH MY GOD THAT PICTURE IS ADORABLE

og avenger: she literally squealed when she saw the picture bucky pls don't steal my woman

metallica: i could never

metallica: but i have a feeling alpine is going to be breaking hearts left right and centre

og avenger: as she should

rambo: omfg yes

witch bitch: yes queen

roma-no: me too alpine

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