Never Forgive

“I still think it’s unnecessary,” Tony growls.

“Well it’s Steve’s orders,” Natasha said.

“Of course it is. It’s totally fair for you guys to train while I sit and watch from the corner,” Tony deadpanned, wheeling into the training room. Natasha walks away to put on her workout attire.

There were over twenty blue mats placed onto the floor, already spotted with sweat as several team members warmed up. Steve was leading Wanda, Vision, Rhodey, and Sam in stretches. Tony rolled his eyes as he noticed Clint and Scott were on the floor having a push-up contest on the side.

“Okay guys, let’s start,” Steve says, standing up.

Tony watches as they all huddle to discuss their training plan. While he was the smallest on the team, he did enjoy training with them, even if it meant he got his ass handed to him on many occasions. When they start getting into groups, Tony takes out his tablet and starts working on some designs for leg braces.

A few minutes in, Rhodey interrupts his calculations and mutterings to Jarvis.

“You can still workout Tony,” Rhodey frowns.

“But I don’t want to,” Tony says, looking back down at his tablet.

Rhodey takes it out of his hands. “Platypus,” Tony whines.

“No, take these and start working,” he says, handing Tony weights. “I’ll check on you in a bit.”

Tony rolls his eyes but starts curling an 8lb so that Rhodey will walk away. He continues switching arms for a few minutes but he quickly gets tired. He checks to make sure Rhodey is distracted before reaching for his tablet again.

Suddenly, Tony’s phone starts ringing. He wheels out of the room before accepting the call.

“Hello?”

“Mr. Stark! I’m so glad to hear from you! I was so scared after I saw you fall and when the ambulance came they wouldn’t let me go with you and I tried to call but Aunt May said I should wait because you were probably still recovering but I wanted to-” Peter rants.

“Slow down, kiddo,” Tony laughs, genuinely happy to hear his voice. “I’m doing okay, still trying to get used to this whole thing…”

“Well I could come and help you if you like! I heard the Rogues are back, which is so not cool after they beat us up at the airport. Are they being nice? I could come over and-”

“Yes, Peter, they are being nice,” Tony lied. “And yes, we can definitely find a day for you to come over and maybe help me in the lab-”

“Oh my gosh that would be so cool, Mr.Stark! I would love that! I’ll ask Aunt May when she gets home from work but i’m sure she’ll let me come. This is so awesome! I thought you would be mad at me because we couldn’t capture the Rogues but I thought we were doing okay until that dude turned huge and-”

“I’m not mad at you Pete, I'm very glad you were able to help, you did great. None of us anticipated they would get so violent so it was not your fault, okay? I’ve got to go now, but let me know what May says and I’ll send Happy to come pick you up,” Tony says.

“Yes, okay, thanks Mr.Stark!”

“No problem Pete, see you soon,” Tony smiles fondly.

As soon as he ends the call, the team strides out of the training room. Most nod at him, besides Clint of course, but Rhodey and Vision approach him.

“Want to order a pizza?” Rhodey asks.

Tony nods. “Viz?”

“I am not impartial to a pizza,” he answers.

“Friday, the usual please,” Tony calls, as they all move to their common floor.

Halfway through their third box, and second Star Wars movie, an alert comes up on the TV to make their way to the conference room.

Rhodey and Tony roll their eyes when Vision, without a word, sinks through the couch and down nine floors. Tony, who is still trying to finish his pizza slice, is picked up by Rhodey and is transferred to his chair. “Hey!” he shouts, mouth full.

“We’re going to be late,” Rhodey says, taking the handles as Tony reaches for a napkin.

“That’s the point!” Tony huffs.

A few minutes later they make it to the conference room to see the whole team sitting at the table. Steve, Sam, Scott, Wanda, and Natasha all squeeze to one side of the table. It is then Tony notices T’challa standing at the front. “Dr. Stark, Colonel Rhodes,” He welcomes in his heavy accent.

“King Kitty,” Tony smiles, “To what do we owe the visit?”

T’Challa rolls his eyes at the nickname but slides Tony a packet. “We believe it is time for James Barnes to return to the United States.”

Steve’s smile almost splits his face.

Tony shudders at the words. “Why?” He can see Steve quickly glare at him.

“We have been able to successfully remove the Winter Soldier programming from his system and believe he is healed enough to return to his duties,” T’Challa says. “Our technicians have provided all the tests and results in your packet.”

Tony flips through a few pages. “And what does the UN think of this?”

“They have approved. Mr. Barnes would be a good addition to your team, and there is no reason to keep him in Wakanda if he is fully recovered,” The king responds.

Everyone is silent for several moments.

“I have duties to return to in Wakanda, but I will be awaiting your approval Dr.Stark,” T’Challa says, moving to leave.

“We will keep in touch,” Tony says.

When the door closes, everyone continues their silence before Steve speaks up. “I think he should come back.”

“Of course you think so,” Rhodey huffs. Tony pats his hand lightly.

“If he’s all recovered from that Winter Soldier stuff then he should get to come back, just like we did,” Sam reasons.

Tony has a belief flash of Bucky shooting into his gauntlet that causes him to pale a bit. Rhodey notices and tries to get his attention. Tony shifts in his chair and looks across the table at the team. “And what if he’s not recovered? What if he gets here and goes wild again? What are we supposed to do? We couldn’t contain him before,” Tony says.

“He won’t,” Steve says firmly.

“But how do you know that?” Natasha says, looking at Steve.

“I’ve known him longer than all of you. Bucky is my friend, he can fight off the Winter Soldier,” Steve squares his shoulders, getting defensive.

Rhodey catches Tony shifting again and tries to get his attention. “What’s wrong?” he whispers to his friend while the team argues.

Tony shakes his head.

“Is it your back? You need pain medicine?” Rhodey asks, seeing Tony tense up.

Tony shakes his head again and Rhodey frowns.

“This is Hydra we are talking about. How do we know the words were the only way to get him to switch? What if he has triggers we don’t know about?” Natasha says.

Before Rhodey can say anything else, the billionaire cries out in pain.

Tony’s legs suddenly clench up involuntarily and jerk up and down. Tony squeezes his thighs in pain, pushing his nails into his flesh.

Rhodey jumps from his chair and kneels in front of Tony. Vision gets up and pulls Tony’s wheelchair away from the table. The rest of the team freeze and look at the scene with wide eyes.

“It’s okay Tony, take a breath,” Rhodey encourages, trying to pry Tony’s hands from where he was gripping his legs.

Tony continues to hold his breath as the muscle spasms travel through his lower body. His legs were rocking the wheelchair in their shaking.

“Tones, listen to me. I know it hurts but you have to breathe,” Rhodey says louder.

Tony squeezes his eyes shut as tears leak out the corners.

The team watching can’t help the guilt that racks through them. Sam leaves his seat and walks over to the trio.

“Can I help?” He asks Rhodey.

Rhodey glares fiercely, but after hearing Tony cry out again in pain, he decides to move over.

Sam kneels down in front of Tony, trying to get the man’s attention. “Try to relax, okay? I’m going to touch your legs, but i’m going to need you to try to relax,” he says softly.

Tony doesn’t respond besides a few hitching breaths.

Sam puts his hands onto Tony’s left leg and starts kneading the muscle, willing it to relax. He can feel the muscles twitching under his hands so he forcefully smooths them down. He keeps going until the leg has stopped its jerking and is completely limp before he moves over to the right leg and does the same. The right leg takes a bit more coaxing but eventually it too relaxes and stops its jerky movements.

By the time Sam finishes, Tony is breathing heavy and trying to focus on Rhodey’s hand that rubs up and down his arm gently. He can feel Vision’s comforting presence behind him as well. Even though his legs now feel like jelly, he can still feel the pain of his muscles daring to start their jerking again. It was a horrible feeling.

“Is that better?” Sam asks.

Tony nods his head. “Thank you,” he rasps.

“It’s no problem,” Sam smiles before standing up.

Rhodey rustles Tony’s hair before nodding to Vision. Rhodey takes the chair handles and steers Tony back to the elevators, leaving the room still frozen in shock.

The men are silent on their way to Tony’s room. Tony continues to rub his palms back and forth over his limp thighs until they get into the bedroom. Tony, completely drained, is forced to accept Rhodey’s help to transfer to the bed.

“Do they still hurt?” Rhodey asks softly, swinging Tony’s legs onto the bed.

Tony nods, pulling up the covers.

Rhodey leaves to get his pills from the bathroom as well as a cup of water. When he returns, Tony leans up to swallow and take a sip before sinking back into the covers.

Rhodey places the half-full cup onto the side table and sits on the edge of the bed.

“I hate this,” Tony whispers into the silence.

“Me too,” Rhodey sighs. He slides his fingers through Tony’s hair as Tony closes his eyes. He waits until Tony’s breathing turns heavy to go back to the conference room.

“I thought he was paralyzed?” Clint asks after a long moment of silence.

“He is, but there are different types of paralysis. He might not be able to move his legs, but depending on where he broke his spine, he might be able to feel them,” Sam corrects.

“He can, well sometimes,” Rhodey answers, walking back into the room. “They thought it was a complete spinal injury at first, but after the swelling went down it turns out it is actually incomplete. So he can’t really move them, but sometimes he can feel them.”

“What just happened then, because his legs were moving on their own,” Scott asks.

“He was having a muscle spasm. The muscles were clamping up on their own, he couldn’t control it,” Rhodey says, sitting down at the table.

“Why does it happen? And how often does that happen?” Scott asked, intrigued.

“There’s not really a trigger for them- It could be that he was sitting too long. And they happen once or twice a day, not always that bad though.”

“Shit, I didn’t know he was in pain like that,” Scott says softly.

“All the time, actually. He had surgery to help fix his spine but now he has chronic pain in his back, he has physical therapy three times a day, and with the muscle spasms- he’s always in pain,” Rhodey sighs.

Clint looks down guiltily. He couldn’t believe he made that comment to Tony a few days ago. He was extremely angry at the Accord situation in addition to Laura refusing to talk to him, but he shouldn’t have taken it out on Tony.

“I’m not saying this to make you feel guilty. But you have to understand how fucked up it is that we came to bring you in peacefully, yet Tony has to suffer for your violence. My best friend is in pain every single minute of every day because you were trying to what? Help Bucky? Does no one else matter?” Rhodey glares.

“He’s my friend,” Steve says softly.

“So was Tony,” Rhodey glares. He gets up to leave.

“It’s so much more than that, Rhodes,” Steve calls.

“Yeah? Well go tell that to my crippled friend.”

As Rhodey makes it to the elevator, Sam runs in just as the door closes.

“What do you want?” Rhodey growls, still on edge.

“I wanted to ask if I could help,” Sam says.

“With what? We are doing just fine,” Rhodey says, still glaring at the elevator doors.

“With Tony’s physical therapy. I am trained in rehabilitation and have helped many soldiers who have obtained similar injuries,” Sam says.

Rhodey is quiet.

“Please, Rhodes. I feel like shit. If I hadn’t ducked that beam, Tony wouldn’t have gotten hit,” Sam says, his voice full of grief.

“You don’t think I know that?” Rhodey says, finally looking at him. “You don’t think Vision knows that? You don’t think Tony knows that?”

“I regret it every day, Rhodes. I do. We all did horrible things that day and afterward, but I really want to help in any way I can. I know you guys came peacefully, I saw you weren’t trying to hurt us, and yet I still tried to hurt you. I will always regret that,” Sam says softly.

Rhodey turns back to the elevator doors. “Stretches when he wakes up, exercises at noon, and a leg massage before bed. On Tuesdays it's water therapy at the pool downstairs, and Thursdays are walking days- he hates Thursdays very much. Friday will call you upstairs when it's time and you may not enter without her permission,” Rhodey says flatly.

Sam lights up. “Thank you very much for this opportunity, I won’t let you down.”

Rhodey nods and exits the elevator on his, Tony, and Vision’s floor. Immediately he freezes in the bedroom door frame when he notices the sheets rustled and Tony gone. The bathroom is empty and so is the walk-in closet.

“Friday, where’s Tony?” He asks, heart racing.

“Sir is in his workshop,” she answers.

Rhodey’s face contorts in anger. He storms back to the elevator and takes it down to the workshop. “Tony!” He shouts as soon as the doors open.

Tony, who was at his desk, jumps in surprise, dropping a piece of metal onto the floor. “Honeybear, good to see you,” he says nervously.

“Tony. You know you’re not allowed to be in the workshop. Not until you’re cleared by your doctor,” Rhodey growls.

“But Rhodes-” Tony whines.

“No, put it down and go upstairs.”

“But I want to build braces so I can walk!” Tony protests.

“I want you to walk again too, Tones,” Rhodey sighs. “But you are going to hurt yourself further if you keep pushing it. You got about a month to go before you can build stuff again, don’t ruin it.” Rhodey pushes Tony into the elevator. “Plus, I heard you are doing great with your physical therapy.”

Tony rolls his eyes. “I hate it.”

“Well it's helping you,” Rhodey says firmly. “Sam is going to be taking over your physical therapy now.”

“What!” Tony shouts, looking up at Rhodey. “Why?”

“He feels bad and wants to help. He’s a certified physical therapist, too.”

Tony frowns, thinking.

“Do you blame him?” Rhodey asks.

Tony pauses. “No, I don’t blame him just like I don’t blame Vision. I shouldn’t have-”

“It’s not your fault,” Rhodey interrupts firmly.

Tony looks at his lap. When the elevator doors open, he rolls out quickly and goes back to his bedroom.

Downstairs, the team contacts T’Challa to send an un-frozen Bucky to the compound.