Chapter 14
Steve watched Celia disappear into her apartment building, standing alone on the sidewalk. He looked around, wondering what he should do while he waited. He was pretty hungry, but didn’t want to venture too far away. Steve was worried about Celia and reluctant to let her out of his sight, no matter how crazy that sounded. It wasn’t like anyone knew about what happened to her, but he kept imagining situations where she would be hurt in front of someone and they would find out. For someone with super healing, Celia was really vulnerable right now.
Steve crossed over to the other side of the street, staking his claim on the cleanest spot on an oversized planter. He pulled out his phone to kill time, like everyone else seemed to do. He googled the neighborhood, trying to find a good restaurant around them that wasn’t too expensive or modern. Steve really could go for a basic, classic burger and a casual lunch was a great, low pressure opportunity to get to know Celia better.
Steve was startled out of his browsing by his phone’s loud ringing, a picture of Tony’s smiling face taking over his screen. Tony had tried to convince him to use a more modern ringtone, but Steve didn’t trust that he would recognize a random song playing as his phone ringing, the classic sound signalling his brain more easily at this point. Tony had begrudgingly set this tone, but made sure to take an obnoxious picture for his contact. Steve let the phone ring for a few seconds, debating if he should let the call go to voicemail. He was still a bit unhappy with how Tony handled the situation with Celia, but if she was willing to let it go, he figured he should respect her decision and do the same. He knew Tony’s heart was in the right place, but he really needed to work on his people skills.
“Hello Tony,” Steve sighed, bringing the phone to his ear.
“You don’t sound too happy to hear from me,” Tony pouted. Steve rolled his eyes, imagining Tony’s bottom lip poking out like a child.
“Did you need something, Stark?” Steve asked, impatiently tapping his foot. He was not the type to chat on the phone, especially when there wasn’t anything important to talk about. He much preferred talking in person, being able to read body language and look people in the eye.
“Wow, I remember receiving a call from you not too long ago and I was much more polite,” Tony scoffed. Steve grit his teeth, feeling immediately guilty for not showing Tony a little grace during this call so far. Tony had really come through for him yesterday and he didn’t deserve Steve being short with him.
“Sorry Tony,” Steve said, offering no excuses or qualifiers, just genuinely apologizing.
“Nah, it’s cool Cap,” Tony brushed off, sounding proud of himself for making Steve feel chastened. “I was just wondering how it was going with our zombie friend.”
“Zombie!” Steve blurted out, glancing around to see if anyone noticed his outburst.
“Yeah, you know, back from the dead,” Tony snickered. “Be careful if she starts sniffing around your head. Your shampoo doesn’t smell that good.”
“Tony, that’s awful! What a terrible thing to joke about,” Steve admonished. “And how do you know what my hair smells like?”
“I have boundary issues. And you didn’t answer me. How are things going?”
“It’s going fine. I’m just waiting for her to finish up some personal things.”
“So there isn’t danger lurking around every corner? Why else would you be following her around like a puppy?”
“I’m not following her like a puppy! I’m just offering support. And that’s real rich coming from a guy that had Natasha following her around this morning,” Steve scoffed.
“Natasha was like a predator. You’re more of an eager beaver, trailing after your new buddy,” Tony laughed. Steve frowned, annoyance bubbling back up.
“I’m hanging up now,” Steve said, pulling the phone away from his ear.
“Wait!” Tony’s voice called from the little speaker holes. Steve reluctantly put the phone back to his ear.
“Yeah?” Steve grunted, conveying just how done with this conversation he was.
“I was looking at the floorplans of the tower and trying to decide which floor would be best. The one under you doesn’t have much going on, but the ceilings are kind of low, which is why we skipped it in the first place. Then there is the one over Bruce’s lab, but the explosion possibilities make it seem like a no go. I could go lower, but then it might feel too separate from the rest of the team,” Tony rambled, causing Steve to shake his head in confusion.
“What are you talking about?” Steve asked, cutting off Tony’s musing. He had no idea what Tony was going on about.
“I’m trying to figure out Celia’s floor,” Tony answered, as if it was obvious.
“Celia’s floor?” Steve said, bewildered. How did Tony go from being the most suspicious of Celia to planning out a floor of his tower for her?
“I figured it would be safest for her to live in the tower, at least until we have a handle on this thing.”
“How do you think you’re gonna convince her to move into the tower?”
“Well, that’s where you come in.”
“Why me?” Steve asked, shaking his head, even if Tony couldn’t see it.
“It’ll sound the best coming from you. You guys have a thing,” Tony explained.
“What thing? We don’t have a thing,” Steve brushed off with a forced laugh. He hated when anyone talked about his personal life. It was private and he liked to keep it that way. Steve had been mortified during a moment of the battle clean up when a group of reporters had cornered him, asking about his love life. He would’ve fought his way out if they hadn’t been distracted by Iron Man flying in and pulling their attention to his over the top antics. Thank goodness he had the cowl.
“All I’m saying is you are the closest to her, apart from maybe Bruce. But anything coming from him might sound more mad scientist than worried friend. It’ll sound less creepy and weird coming from you, with your boy scout face,” Tony argued. Steve would be lying if he said he didn’t like the idea of keeping Celia close right now, when all of this was so new. But he knew springing this on her, in the middle of all this turmoil might be too much to handle. He definitely didn’t want her to feel like she didn’t have a choice in the matter.
“I’ll bring it up,” Steve sighed, agreeing to Tony’s suggestion. “But you have to accept her answer, even if you don’t like it.”
“Of course, I’m not the type to be pushy,” Tony scoffed. Steve rolled his eyes, letting that obvious lie slide.
“I’ll let you know what she says, just don’t start drawing up blueprints quite yet,” Steve said, watching a car pull up into a loading zone in front of Celia’s building. “I gotta go.” Steve pressed the end button on his phone, nonchalantly browsing through the settings so he could look occupied while he watched the car. This was a pretty quiet street without much car or foot traffic, so he didn’t want to call attention to himself by looking like a stalker. The driver typed something quickly into her phone, tapping her fingers on the steering wheel. A few minutes later, Celia and a shorter woman walked out of the building carrying a few bags and boxes. They loaded everything into the trunk before Celia sprinted back into the building. The short woman glanced nervously around and Steve finally saw her face, recognizing her as the woman on Celia’s fake ID. Celia came back out of the building quickly, carrying a few more boxes. She exchanged a few words with the driver before giving her a quick hug, whispering something in her ear. Celia turned to the nervous woman, pulling her into a more forceful hug, the woman gripping desperately onto her back. Celia gently stroked the back of the woman’s head, dipping down to whisper something to her also. The woman nodded, standing straighter and more determined when they broke apart. Celia smiled proudly, wiping the woman’s tears away and gently guiding her to the car. With one last squeeze of their hands, the woman got in the car, waving a little as the car pulled away.
Steve tucked his phone back into his pocket, feeling oddly emotional from what he just watched. He cleared his throat, looking up to where Celia stood alone on the sidewalk, watching after the car as it turned out of sight. She glanced up at him, motioning for him to join her. Steve trotted to her side, giving her a small smile.
“How was your lunch?” Celia asked, scrubbing her hands over her face. She looked absolutely drained.
“I didn’t go,” Steve admitted. “I was still hoping you’d join me, but you don’t really seem up for it.”
“I’m sorry, I’m just a little tired,” Celia mumbled through a yawn. “You can come up and make a sandwich or something if you want.” Celia walked back to the building, waving her arm behind her to signal Steve to follow. He trailed behind her, hiding a smile when she went straight to the stairs instead of the elevator. She bounded up the stairs faster than he expected with her fatigue, but kept up easily. Celia led him to a door on the third floor and ushered him into one of the barest apartments he had seen since his youth. There were the normal things, a couch, a tv, tables and lamps, but absolutely nothing personal he could see. No pictures on the wall, no knick knacks on any shelves. It looked straight out of a catalog, like anyone could breeze in and out. Celia dropped her bag onto the coffee table, continuing further into the apartment toward the kitchen. He followed her, standing awkwardly in the doorway. The kitchen was just as stripped down as the living room. Nothing was out of place and there wasn’t anything extra. Even the towels were a stark, plain white.
“Did you just move in?” Steve blurted out, not able to hold back any longer. Celia shook her head and went back to pulling out a glass from the cupboard.
“I don’t have a lot of options, but I have the stuff for a sandwich,” she offered, filling the glass from the tap and holding it out toward him. He took it with a grateful nod, taking a small sip as he glanced around the room a little more. He thought he kept his floor basic, but even he had a few personal touches here and there.
“Actually, I’m not that hungry,” Steve said, wincing when Celia quirked an eyebrow at him. Why was he being so weird? He hid behind the glass, taking a long drink. Celia was staring at him, her arms folded over her chest.
“Why did you come with me, Steve?” Celia asked, apparently done with this strange tension that had somehow built up. “Are you here to keep an eye on me so I don’t disappear? I’m not planning on going anywhere, so that isn’t necessary.”
“No, it’s not anything like that,” Steve denied, rolling the almost empty glass between his hands. “I know how I felt after my… change, how scary it was, especially without Dr. Erskine around to answer any questions, and I guess I just wanted to be here in case you needed something. It’s my fault you’re in this situation to begin with, so I want to do anything I can to help.” He kept his gaze focused on his hands, not used to admitting weakness. Bucky was the only person he talked to about how he felt after he got the serum, not wanting anyone else to see the super soldier as anything but the strong beacon of hope he was created to be. But in the quiet moments with Bucky, he could let his guard down and be honest about the fear he felt going in and the fear after, that he would be a disappointment. Steve heard Celia sigh and he glanced up with a grimace, hoping he hadn’t offended her by insinuating she wouldn’t be able to handle this on her own. She was still staring at him, this time with a small smile.
“I appreciate your concern and there is something you can do for me,” Celia said, walking over and placing her hand over his, stopping him from spinning the glass.
“Anything,” he agreed quickly, setting the glass down on the small table next to him.
“Try to stop blaming yourself for what happened,” Celia said, folding her arms again. He sagged a little, shaking his head. “I know it’s easier said than done. Heaven knows I can guilt myself for every terrible thing to happen in the world, but I know it’s not healthy so I actively try not to put everything on my shoulders.”
“I should have been able to stop him, before it got that far,” Steve argued, balling up his fists. He was suddenly glad he had set down the glass, instead of shattering it in his anger.
“Well, if you’re gonna feel guilty for me getting hurt, then I’m gonna feel guilty for making you upset. So now neither of us are happy,” Celia said with a shrug. “I can be very stubborn, so I guess you’ll have to get past this for the both of us.” Steve blew out a breathy chuckle, recognizing Celia’s attempt at lightening the mood and appreciating the effort. She let out another big yawn, rubbing at her eyes.
“I should let you get some sleep,” Steve said, backing out of the kitchen and into the living room. Celia followed him, sinking tiredly onto the couch and leaning her head back.
“I’ll call you,” Celia murmured, closing her eyes. Steve glanced back one last time before he closed the door with a quiet snick, sighing in resignation. No matter what she said and what he promised, he couldn’t accept that this whole situation wasn’t his fault. He had to be better than this. If people around him kept dying or getting hurt, what was he even doing? He was made to save the world and if he couldn’t, the Avengers might need to find a new leader.
Steve looked around the hallway, trying to figure out his next moves. He didn’t really feel like going back to the tower, even though it would be smart to rest to give the serum a chance to heal up his wound. But going home meant leaving Celia alone and he still didn’t want to do that. Steve wanted to believe she would call if she needed anything, but he also knew she was stubborn, she had said it herself. He shook his head, a rueful smile on his face. Celia did remind him of Peggy a bit, headstrong and not willing to back down from a fight. They both also had a softer side, dedicating their lives to helping other people. Maybe that was why he felt so drawn to Celia, besides the guilt. She just seemed like someone he would enjoy knowing, and that wasn’t so easy to find in this time. There were a lot of things about this time that were better than his, health and technology and social acceptance, but connecting to people on a personal level seemed impossible now. You couldn’t just chat up someone on the street without the other person thinking you had some sort of agenda. But Celia and him had been able to have somewhat of a conversation, before it all went to shit. Sure, it was a little awkward, but it was more comfortable than he had with anyone outside of the Avengers bubble. He found he really didn’t want the possibility of a friendship to pass him by.
Steve sighed, making his way slowly back to the staircase down the hall. He stopped short when he heard a quiet noise that sounded like a gasp. Steve paused, letting his super senses do their thing and block out the ambient noise, focusing on the sound of distress he was sure he heard. He heard it again, a low moan and sharp inhale. A small surge of panic had him bursting back through Celia’s door, unconsciously glad she hadn’t gotten up to lock it behind him. They really didn’t need the audience a broken down door would bring. Celia was sitting on her couch where he had left her, rubbing at her right elbow. Her head was thrown back and resting on the top of the couch, a grimace on her face. He hovered in front of her, not sure what to do. Would touching her make things worse? Did she even realize he was in the room?
“Celia?” he whispered, tentatively reaching out to touch her knee. Her eyes snapped open, staring at him with a startled gaze. Steve patted the air in front of them in a calming gesture, kneeling down to be level with her. Celia slowly came back to herself, evening out her breathing and relaxing partially into the cushions of the couch.
“What just happened?” he asked, looking down at the elbow she had just been rubbing. There was obviously nothing there now, but he hadn’t noticed anything there before he left either.
“I fell asleep.”