Chapter 18
Getting comfortable in the chairs next to Peter’s bed Natasha remembered what she had promised Wanda.
“Friday, would you please contact Wanda and tell her we’re now able to sit with him but that he shows no sign of waking up anytime soon. Oh, also will you let her know when he wakes up please because chances are, I will forget.”
“Of course, Miss Romanoff.”
“Thank you.”
Looking at Peter he was just so pale, almost ghostly and with that idea she held his hand a little tighter. Peter is alive. Peter is in front of them. Peter is home. But if she was honest, she was too afraid to close her eyes in case when she woke up it was all a dream. Natasha was too busy convincing herself that Peter was actually finally in front of her that she missed the glances that James kept throwing her, well that was until he finally spoke up.
“Natalia, we have a problem.” That made her head shoot to him and then quickly look around the room, she’s been sat here the entire time, what problem could James even be speaking of?
“What? What do you mean we have a problem?”
“You know how you shot Strucker?” Natasha nodded her head at that, “Well on a good note he is finally dead, I went into the room after me and Wanda had finished on her side and he was just lying there. His body was taken into Shield though so if he isn’t they’ll find out but I’m almost completely sure that he is but I know that Hydra is annoyingly slippery so you never know. The problem we have though is that none of us got Norman Osborn, we couldn’t find him anywhere and that means that –“
“Peter isn’t safe.” She finished for him, turning to look back at Peter, when was this boy going to get a break.
“Yeah, Stark is on it though and the moment he finds him we can go get him. We can end him the way you ended Strucker, jail is too kind for the monsters.” James practically growled, the anger he feels clear in his eyes.
“I got Strucker, you get Osborn. It is his turn to be hunted, when you get him James make sure he knows he isn’t getting out of it alive. I want him to know he’s going to die. Strucker may have been the one who physically harmed Peter the most, Norman is the one who threatened him, made him run, taunted him and then handed him over to be experimented on.” James just nodded back to her, going to look out of the window, the hatred swirling in him clear.
Natasha hated that man only slightly less than Strucker, only because of the physical wounds that he had afflicted on Peter. She was able to get rid of him, she was able to watch the life go out in the eyes of a man who had harmed her child, James had not. It was moments like these when she truly didn’t understand why Peter chose the two of them, he hated violence, hated death yet picked the two adults who didn’t blink an eye at it. Normally that brought her some feeling of guilt, knew Peter was right when he talked about containing them rather than killing them but the men who had taken Peter, she felt no guilt over their deaths, no remorse at all.
Eventually James decided to leave, reluctantly which was obvious with how he lingered around Peter, fussing over every little thing but he had to go meet Stark, had to try and help find Osborn in anyway that he could. The silence which followed his exit was deafening, whenever she was alone with Peter there was always some kind of noise, whether it was Peter himself telling her about something or if they were just watching something together, there was always noise. Noise other than the sound of Peter’s heartbeat filling the room, Natasha was grateful she could hear it in a sense, she could see he is alive and she could hear it but she feared the sound would seize, that the noise of his heart stopping would fill the room, it was unlikely but she still feared it would happen.
She wasn’t sure how long she’d been sat there before he finally opened his eyes, her heart both broke and mended itself when those brown bambi eyes looked back at her. Healed because finally here he was, when she found him, he didn’t open his eyes wide enough or even long enough for her to see those eyes she had missed. Broke because the fear embedded in them hurt, so much fear, the moment his eyes met hers he quickly moved so as to not make eye contact. He seemed afraid of her.
“Hey sweetie, are you feeling okay?” To that she got a timid nod from him. “Do you need anything?” To that he shook his head.
Okay so he wouldn’t look at her and he wouldn’t speak to her. Why?
“I’m going to go get Helen okay.” She got nothing in response to that.
Leaving the room she composed herself, no matter how much his distance hurt she couldn’t show him, not now. He needed their help, not their sorrow. Walking to Cho Natasha tried to think of what to do, she expected him to be a little different, the poor boy was tortured and alone for a month he wasn’t going to be the bubbly kid that had left them. But this? She didn’t expect this. Didn’t expect the silence and the avoidance, the way he was avoiding eye contact hurt, he seemed even more insecure than the fourteen-year-old that met the whole team after the incident in Germany. After that though he still rambled at least, and made fleeting eye contact, this silence? This was something she had never seen.
“Helen?” The woman turned around at the sound of her name, her smile dropping at the sorrow Natasha tried so hard to hide.
“What’s going on?”
“He’s awake.”
“Okay?”
“He won’t look at me, he won’t speak to me. I don’t know what to do Cho.” Natasha tried so hard not to break down. Friday must have told the team by now Peter had woken up, but also the rest of it, or else they would all be down here. But they aren’t, because that wouldn’t help.
“Alright well then we should go back to the room so I can do a check-up. I have to warn you now though I have to ask if he wants the check-up to happen with just me and him in the room, and if he’s as scared and uncomfortable as you say he is then he might say yes.”
The two women walked back to Peter’s room in complete silence, maybe Natasha was wrong, maybe Peter just woke up confused maybe when she walked back into the room he’s ramble to her once again and everything would be fine. Hoped that everything would be fine, maybe she had just read him wrong again.
Or not.
Walking into the room Natasha saw Peter had moved, he was not sat up but instead of staring at the opposite wall his eyes stayed looking down at his lap.
“Hello Peter, I’m sorry we’re meeting again in these circumstances.” Helen spoke to him as she walked around the bed to access her equipment. Peter just nodded. “So, I need to do a check-up now that you’re awake. Would you like Natasha to be in the room as this takes place?” Peter tensed for a moment, hesitating for a moment before slowly shaking his head.
Okay, so he doesn’t want her to be in the room with him. Cho’s eyes shot to her in sympathy, clearly understanding that Peter’s desire for her to leave hurt but she couldn’t let him know that. It hurt yes but if her not being in the room with him made him comfortable, while he was safe, she would deal with it.
“Alright then Peter, well I’ll be just outside if you need me.” All Natasha wanted to do was hug him, to run her hand through his curls like she used to and yet right now all she could do was leave the room. Leave the room and sit outside waiting, waiting for what she wasn’t sure, would he ever want her in the room?
“I’m going to start having a look at your injuries now, is that okay?” Peter wasn’t exactly sure why he couldn’t speak as he nodded at Helen, making sure he was continuing to look down at the blanket on his lap. The moment he had woken up he saw Natasha staring back at him and he felt the urge to turn away, when she spoke to him he couldn’t get the words to form and so he didn’t.
“Well, I think that the IV has been helping you, your injuries aren’t healing as quick as the usually would which is a slight problem but that’s due to the lack of food you’ve been having which I’m sure will soon be back on track. I think that it might be best for you to go back to your own room, if you would like. I’m sure that would be much more comfortable than this and we have the resources to ensure your wounds are taken care of there. Would you like that?”
Again, all he could do was nod.
“Peter, I don’t know if you aren’t speaking because you don’t wish to, or if you simply can’t right now and I know you’re unable to tell us. Obviously, you will need to see someone eventually, someone who can help you understand and come to terms with what has happened. Right now, though, I understand you were uncomfortable with Natasha in the room but would you like Wanda to come in, the two of you will be able to communicate telepathically, if that was something you wanted. Would that be okay?”
If Peter is completely honest, he didn’t think of that. Part of him wanted Tasha to come back in, wanted her to wrap him up in her arms so he could finally feel safe, but he couldn’t speak to her, he had turned away from her, he had her removed from the room. He didn’t deserve that hug. Would Wanda’s power’s work? Would he be able to communicate with her that way? Eventually he finally allowed himself to nod, giving Helen the permission to call for Wanda.
He wasn’t sure how long it took for Wanda to come running through the doors, there was no clock in this room, even if there was, he wouldn’t look up and he couldn’t ask. Peter made sure to avoid eye contact with her, it didn’t feel right after avoiding Tasha’s eyes, was Tasha outside like she said she’d be?
“Hey Pete, Helen told me you were having trouble speaking.” Wanda whispered as she sat down on the chair next to him, “She also said you were open to trying to speak to me telepathically? Are you still wanting to try?”
All he could do was nod, they had done this almost everyday before, before he had left. She’d stopped asking him for permission after a while, seeing as they had a link open at all times, she knew when she was allowed in without even having to ask. Peter had ruined that though hadn’t he? He’d abandoned her and then cut that link, blocking her out when she had tried to reach him, he had left her and severed all contact with her. At his nod Helen left the room saying over her shoulder that if they needed anything just to get Friday to notify her of it and she would be there as fast as she could.
“Okay then Pete, I know you severed the last link we had, which is alright. Are you comfortable with me going ahead and forming another one? If you remember I need to place my hands on your temples to form it, is that okay?” He nodded quicker to that question, the moment he had cut the last link, the moment he had he felt it, this emptiness. They weren’t using it at the time, seeing as he had blocked her but the moment the connection was lost, he felt cold for a moment, more alone than he had in a while.
So, the moment Wanda’s hands touched his temples, he did flinch at first the contact causing him to react, but after that he allowed himself to feel the warmth of Wanda’s powers seeping in, knowing it had worked. He decided to take the first step.
“Hey Wanda.”
“Hello Peter. I’ve missed you.”
It hurt, watching Wanda pass her to go into his room hurt. Peter wanted Wanda not her. Natasha understood it though, Wanda could communicate with him the way none of them could, but that didn’t make it hurt any less. Wanda could help Peter while all she could do was sit outside of his room waiting for news once again, he didn’t want her sitting with, wouldn’t speak to her, wouldn’t even look at her. She would just have to wait.