dreamer

"Brooklyn get your brother and come down here"

"whats up mom?" she asks as Kaden takes a seat across from their mother, she frowns and sits next to him

"I'm worried about your sister"

"why?"

"because she is hardly ever home anymore and when she is the only thing she does is sleep"

"she's experiencing life for the first time mom its normal" Kaden replies defending his sister, though he had wondered about her himself

"she isn't a normal girl though, she tried to commit suicide"

"mom"

"its true, the doctors told me that to watch out for changes in behavior because its a sign that she might be-"

"Jesus mom just because she's having fun doesn't meant she's gonna kill herself" Brooke comments angrily ignoring the angry stare she gets from her mother

"Brooklyn"

"She's happy isn't that enough?"

"its unlike her"

"thats because you constantly blame her for everything, she knows that you hate her for what happened with-"

"don't you finish that sentence Kaden"

"her entire life has been one trauma after another, why do you think she wanted to kill herself? I don't see the issue with her finally acting like a normal college student" He yells before walking out of the room, Brooke glares at her mother who was visibly feeling defeated before walking out of the room as well. The older woman is left alone with her thoughts, as selfish at it was she hadn't ever realized she was blaming her daughter for the death of her youngest. However she knew her daughter, her behavior was strange and she needed to figure out why. The woman gets up from her spot and walks up the stairs and straight into her middle child's room, she goes through every single drawer before finding the half empty bottle of sleeping pills.

-

"Jackie I can't believe you made out with that guy before we left"

"I can, you were eyeing him all night"

"well what can I say, mama gets what mama wants" Jackie comments causing all the girls to laugh loudly. They were currently in the car on their way home from another party, it was their thing. They would party all weekend and they all loved it. Amelia had never done anything like that until the month prior, after she had met Jackie they all accepted her into their group. They hung out every single day and made her feel like she truly belonged, she had never realized how much she wanted to feel needed until then. She loved partying with the girls, it was a nice distraction from her fucked up life, she enjoyed dancing all night until she could barely move. They had even made her forget about Ashton, she no longer thought about him every second of the day. He would cross her mind occasionally and she missed him but she knew that there was nothing she could do to see him if it wasn't meant to be. Tonight they had gone to a party and danced all night long wits drinks in hand, however she had decided not to get too plastered and drank enough to get buzzed. She didn't need to come home and face her family completely drunk, she had been able to avoid them but for some reason her mother had been trying to talk to her more than usual lately. Amelia knew that she was worried about her behavior but she honestly didn't care, she wanted to live her life without having to be on suicide watch. As they pull up to her house the girls eyes widen when she spots her mother and father int he kitchen from the street

"oh shit you're about to get your ass beat"

"yeah probably" she comments

"good luck babe, text the group chat later so we can make sure you aren't dead"

"I will" she says blowing them a kiss before shutting the door, she watches as they drive away before taking a deep breath and walking into her house.

"Amelia come here" her father says calmly, she mentally curses to herself before walking over and sitting down across from them

"where were you?"

"I was at a party" she says honestly, there was no hiding it she was wearing Jackies black dress and her hair was curled

"its 3 am"

"yeah"

"Amelia do you have no common sense?" her mother yells

"I don't know mom"

"clearly you don't! we have been worried about you all night and you couldn't bother to send a text?"

"I didn't think you cared enough"

"really? not this again Jesus" her mother yells

"sorry mom did I offend you?"

"Amelia we need to discuss your recent behavior"

"why?"

"because you are out of control"

"how do you figure?" she asks angrily, the girl was certainly not in the mood for another lecture on how she was acting

"what is this doing hiding in your drawer?" her father asks setting the pill bottle down on the tae in front of her, she gulps as her brain scrambles to find an excuse. They would institutionalize her if they found out why she really had them

"I have a hard time sleeping"

"since when?"

"I don't know" she says shrugging her shoulders

"Amelia are you aware of the consequences of mixing sleeping pills and antidepressants?"

"no"

"well let me inform you, if you take these at the same time you could overdose"

"ok"

"ok? thats all you have to say? you could have killed yourself!"

"but I didn't mom! I've been taking the recommended doses I'm ok!" she yells defending herself

"if you were ok you wouldn't have tried to kill yourself"

"shut up!"

"its true Amelia, you can't expect us not to be worried after what happened" her father comments trying to defuse the situation, they hadn't planned on fighting like this but clearly his wife had other plans.

"I'm not trying to OD I just want to sleep at night"

"oh Jesus listen to yourself, you've gotten addicted to them haven't you?"

"no"

"so you won't have a problem with me taking them then will you?"

"mom you can't do that! how am I supposed to sleep?" she asks angrily

"I guess you'll have to figure that one out"

"you can't do this!" the girl pleads as tears fall down her face, that was her only way to get back to Ashton. She couldn't lose him, though she hadn't been back in a while the thought of no longer having the option to see him was sickening.

"you need to get your life together, trust me one day you'll thank me for doing you this favor"

"fuck you" the girl mumbles before standing from the seat, she runs up the stairs and goes straight to her room. She strips out of the dress and puts on her PJ's before taking a seat at her desk, she pulls out her journal and rereads over her last entry, taking in the drawing of Ashtons face. Tears slide down her cheeks as right now she missed him more than ever.