Introductions gone wrong
Spiderman created a new chat
Spiderman added : mj-watson, Harry-O, Maya Lopez +7 people to the chat
Spiderman changed their name to Spidey
Spidey : ok folks
Spidey : my partners asked to be introduced to some of you because they love me and care about me
Harry Osborn : na we just want the embarrassing stories
Spidey changed Harry Hosborn’s name to Harold
Harold : rude
Deadpool : lmao i already love it here
Spidey : so i decided to create a chat with those of you who know my identity
Spidey : of course you don’t have to give your names if you don’t want to and you can leave if this makes you uncomfortable in any way
Deadpool : awww you’re so sweet Spidey ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️
Spidey : thank you Wade
Spidey : so uh, that’s it
Spidey : introduce yourselves i guess?
Jessica Jones : ok
Jessica Jones : I’m Jessica
Jessica Jones : Spidey can give you guys my number if you really actually need me
Jessica Jones : now no offence but i already am in a gc with these idiots and i think that if i witnessed more of their bullshit I’ll lose my mind
Daredevil : we love you too, Jess
Jessica Jones : so I’m outta here
Jessica Jones has left the chat
Kate Bishop : this woman doesn’t give a single shit i love her
Kate Bishop : @Clint Barton give me her number
Clint Barton : bold of you to assume i have it
Kate Bishop : does nat?
Clint Barton : it’s nat so yeah probably
Spidey : uh guys? Introduction please ?
Clint Barton : oh right
Clint Barton : hang on
Clint Barton changed their name to Hawkguy
Kate Bishop changed their name to Superior Hawkeye
Hawkguy : how dare you?
Superior hawkeye : it’s the truth and you know it
Hawkguy : friendship with kate ended
Hawkguy : @ spidey’s partners can i adopt one of you
MJ Watson changed their name to Watz
Watz : sorry sir i have perfectly good parents
Harold : sounds fake
Maya Lopez changed their name to echo
Echo : imagine having parents
Deadpool : woooooh is it tragic backstory time?
Hawkguy : there’s a circus in mine
Daredevil : that explains why you’re a clown
Hawkguy : double d why are you so mean?
Superior hawkeye : na dd’s nice
Superior hawkeye : omg @daredevil since clint ended our friendship we could work together
Daredevil : i’d be honoured, Miss Bishop
Hawkguy : back off demon
Luke Cage : I can start the introductions round
Spidey : thank you Luke I love you
Luke Cage : Alright
Luke Cage : So, I am Luke and if you ever need my help I'll do whatever I can. I don’t mind Peter giving you my number. We all are adults and I trust you to not use it to mess with me or anything like that.
Watz : thank you
Hawkguy : damn luke you’re so good at being like, a functional adult
Deadpool : it’s his actual super power
Luke Cage : Also, I just asked her and Claire is ok with you having her number.
Watz : who’s claire?
Daredevil : the real super hero of nyc
Spidey : a saint
Superior hawkeye : a legend
Hawkguy : the most patient person on earth
Deadpool : the only person whose couch is bloodier than mine
Watz : ok?
Luke Cage : Claire is my girlfriend and the nurse who manages somehow to keep the whole vigilante population of new york alive
Watz : oh wow all of you ?
Watz : i feel like i should send her flowers or a new couch
Luke Cage : she deserves it
Luke Cage : it was nice to meet you guys
Luke Cage has left the chat
Daredevil : so the only one with some common sense left
Echo : excuse you?
Daredevil : my apologies
Spidey : god y’all are so bad at introducing yourselves
Hawkguy : sorry i can’t be luke 😔
Superior hawkeye : i don’t accept your apology
Harold : this is such a mess i love it
Deadpool : same
Spidey : ok fine i’ll show the examples
Echo : my hero
Watz : so much sarcasm in 2 written words
Watz : i aspire to be that powerful
Spidey : Helloooo everyone, my name is Peter but you can call me Spidey, my pronouns are he/him and once i stuck my hand in a vending machine
Harold : that’s what you chose to share with the group? Really Peter ?
Spidey : no one here has any respect for me whatsoever
Spidey : harry you’re next
Harold : fine
Harold : hi folks, i’m Harry, my pronouns are he/him and i hate my father’s guts
Superior hawkeye : omg me too
Harold : one of my people !
Spidey : so you criticise my introduction but you introduce yourself by dumping your daddy issues?
Harold : shut up Parker
Harold : kate and i are having a moment here
Superior hawkeye : you really have to ruin everything don’t you Parker ?
Spidey : why do you hate me?
Deadpool : i love you Spidey ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️
Spidey : thank you Wade you’re my only friend ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️
Hawkguy : not to agree with Spidey but this introduction isn’t acceptable
Hawkguy : everyone here has daddy issues
Harold : hum alright
Harold : i won’t elaborate on the why and the how but i threw up on Tony Stark once
Superior hawkeye : kdkdkfk that was you?
Harold : you were there?
Superior hawkeye : i’ve never seen so many businessmen trying and failing to keep a straight face
Superior hawkeye : only time i wasn’t angry with my parents for dragging me to a gala
Daredevil : i like you, Harry
Harold : thanks
Hawkguy : lmaooo
Hawkguy : my turn
Hawkguy : clint barton, he/him and i love my dog
Daredevil : clint come to Hell’s Kitchen
Daredevil : i miss lucky
Hawkguy : and what about me?
Daredevil : you’re ok i guess
Hawkguy : awww that’s the nicest thing you ever told me
Hawkguy : i grew on you
Daredevil : like fungus
Daredevil : or wade
Deadpool : you’re lucky you’re hot
Spidey : dd and echo are so mean and for what?
Echo : we’re disabled we’re allowed to be as bitchy as we want
Daredevil : that’s the law
Hawguy : not to agree with the evil twins but it’s true
Spidey : fair
Spidey : whose turn is it?
Echo : i’ll go
Echo : Hi, I’m Maya, my pronouns are she/her and i kicked spidey’s ass
Harold : can i ask what your powers are?
Echo : i don’t have any
Harold : ???
Spidey : it’s true
Spidey : she’s just very competent
Superior Hawkeye : all hail the queen
Harold : wow
Harold : i respect and fear you
Spidey : as you should
Echo : @daredevil go ahead
Daredevil : yes ma’am
Daredevil : You can call me mike, he/him and i was raised by nuns
Deadpool : why so boring dd?
Daredevil : i'm keeping the juicy stuff for later
Deadpool : fair
Deadpool : hi kids, i’m wade, he/him, i know all the lyrics to the legally blonde musical
Hawkguy : wade! Let’s watch it together
Deadpool : yes bestie !!!!
Superior hawkeye : the neighbours will complain again
Hawkguy : idc
Hawkguy : introduce yourself kate
Superior hawkeye : Kate, she/her, the superior hawkeye
Hawkguy : i’d disagree but it is absolutely true
Superior hawkeye : that left @watz
Watz : my name is mary jane but you can call me MJ, my pronouns are she/they and i am a journalist
Harold : and the ultimate ginger
Spidey : she's the ultimate ginger
Watz : aw boys 🧡