Chapter 8
It took months for everyone to get back to any kind of normal. During those first few months, a lot was happening. All over the world everything was changing, the Avengers were helping, as best they could.
The world governments wanted it to go back to the way it was before. Borders and walls between everyone. They were focused more on those who had been gone and not at all to those who stayed.
Sam and Bucky took it upon themselves to tell the governments to be respectful. Sam took a page out of Nat and Tony’s books while telling the UN, on live TV;
“Wake the fuck up! I understand that millions of people came back into existence. A majority of my friends did. But look at both sides of the playing board. Those of us who stayed, who were here struggling, who continued to fight even if we’d lost everything, we matter too. Don’t brush us aside. Five years is a long time. We’re here don’t kick us out of our homes because someone else used to live there. A lot of people moved on and created lives without those who got dusted. I did! I got a kid, I got a boyfriend, I’m Captain America. But I know that things have changed now, I was one of the people who helped change it. Now, that kid I call my own has a sister who came back. My own sister is back but her kids don’t want to leave my house to go back to her. My best friend, Steve Rogers, he’s back he was Captain America before he blipped. I’m still trying to figure out what’s going to happen there. With a lot of things in my own personal life just like everyone else. I’m also trying to help with the Global Repatriation Council, I’m trying. Everyone is. So don’t leave us who were left in your rear view mirror. Everyone has been affected by the blip.”
Bucky was so proud in that moment. The whole team was when Sam arrived back at the tower. Harley smiled and hugged him tight without words. He was still grieving but he was proud of his dad. Emma was too.
Those who’d come back were still adjusting to this new world. New team. It got awkward a few times, a lot more than they originally thought.
Three months of helping out with the GRC, homelessness caused by those who came back, over population, riots, small things compared to Thanos but still necessary. Those three months were tiring but imperative to the world and the team.
They needed to see these things that were caused. They needed to help with the aftermath. First hand, get down to first level and crawl with those civilians who were struggling in ways maybe they never would.
But three months and a new threat came upon them. Someone had sought out and killed, massacred, a hundred of the blipped. He said he was sending a message that the Avengers shouldn’t have brought them back in the first place. That he’d kill them too if they got in the way.
This was the first real, oh shit, between the team. This was where it was a real split in two moment. Anyone looking in from outside could tell who had been left and who had dusted.
Friday had just finished her recap to them all as they stood in the lounge and kitchen area. Bruce was the first to ask what they needed to do. That’s when it started.
“We should—"
“Well, we—"
Steve and Peter cut each other off and then made eye contact from across the kitchen island. The awkwardness was not a good smell in the air.
“Uh, Peter plans, he tells us what to do and we do it. In the field, if anything goes wrong, I’m next up.” Sam says hoping the others would just listen and understand.
They knew where this guy would be they just needed a plan. Two days to prepare, the messages Shuri had hacked into said he would be in Paris then. He apparently wanted to hang bodies from the Eiffel Tower.
“He’s a kid—“
“I’m 21.” Peter arguing glaring at Clint who put his hands up.
There was another prolonged silence. Peter made eye contact with his team—his not blipped team—god he hated that. He wished they didn’t have to go through the whole “this is what’s happening now you can step back” but that’s how it was.
“Maybe…” Harley bit his lip hating to have to say this, “you guys should sit back for this one—“ they all interrupted with arguments and loud protests.
“Harley might be right!” Peter said over them just getting them to speak up louder.
“Just because we were blipped doesn’t mean we can’t fight!”
“Five years for you was five seconds for us.”
“We are plenty capable—“
Sam saw that they weren’t going to listen to Harley or Peter, neither Lila or Shuri as he saw them about to jump in. So he interrupted instead.
“I think what Harley and Peter mean,” he gave the two a look and they didn’t protest him speaking for them, “is that since it’s been five years, a lot has changed. We’ve changed, just watch from the jet if we need you we’ll call for you.” Sam said in the nicest way possible. They still went on to argue and talk over each other.
“See here’s the thing!” Bucky decided to cut in this time. “It wasn’t a suggestion.” They went to interrupt, again, but he didn’t give them a chance. “You stay in the jet. What Peter says goes, just because him, Harley, Lila, and Shuri, are young. Does not mean they are weak, they’ve gone through a lot of shit, they lead. Not you.” Bucky said then motioned to the jet moving toward it.
Shuri would totally love this. She was currently with her brother in Wakanda working some things out with their people. She said she’d be back but until then it was the group chat memes, Face Time calls, and bothering Okoye with hologram messages.
The team going into the field was Peter, Harley, Lila, Sam, Bucky, and Loki. Yep they’re gonna crash and burn, Lila thought—knew. Rhodey, the only one who ever acts like adult, was helping out with the GRC along with Bruce.
So they crowded into the jet along with Steve, Clint, Natasha, Steve, and Thor who’d just come back from visiting New Asgard. They were about to go into a mission with the original Avengers who would most definitely be in their coms looking over their shoulders the entire time.
—
When they entered the jet after the mission, deaf in one ear from Steve and Tony yelling, they were proud of themselves. Lila was more shocked than those who had stayed on the plane. They got through a mission, successfully, without Rhodey being an adult to them.
Not even Bucky had to step in. He rarely ever does he’s just as much of a child in Lila’s opinion just a slight bit more responsible when it came to serious situations. It’s more of Sam, Harley, and Peter dragging him down into bad situations. He really has no control whatsoever when the three of them get involved.
Loki laughed the entire time while screaming “die vermin”. He later said to Lila that he didn’t think of her as such. Peter and Harley, and the rest… different story.
They flew back to the tower while Tony and Clint critiqued their entire mission. Thor chimed in a few times but in an unintentionally insulting way.
All in all, they were relatively respectful. Didn’t immediately jump in, didn’t insult as bad more jokingly with creative criticism, most felt good about it. The ones who blipped understood there were many differences now then before.
There were talks between some of course. Like Sam and Steve about Captain America. Like Pepper, Laura, and Clint about Nathaniel and Lila. Like Loki and Thor about New Asgard. Like Wanda and Vision about how he was alive. Like Bucky and Sarah about Sam and the boys.
—
Sam really didn’t know how to bring it up. He didn’t know if he should bring it up. He didn’t know what would happen now. Could they have two Cap’s? Now that Steve was back would the government push him out?
There were so many unanswered questions. So many different things that could happen.
Sam had a hard time with being Captain America in the beginning. Hard time accepting it. Steve had a will. He left the shield to Sam.
At first he wanted to give it to Bucky. He wanted nothing to do with it at first. He was so fine with it sitting in a pedestal in the compound for the first year.
Throughout that year people kept coming to him about it. Rhodes did. Pepper did. Harley, Bucky, Peter, Lila, more…
In the beginning he kept denying it all and said they were going to get Steve back. They all hoped. Of course they did, when your friends and family die bringing them back when there’s a chance. It’s the only option.
After a while they did all except it. Didn’t mean they couldn’t keep looking. That’s what the kids did. They had a whole life why not waste some years on looking for a solution.
They put it after missions and fighting crime, and all that though. Not that there was tons of that. There was still lots but not Avengers level, call in the fucking gods, threats. Except for that stupid mafia up in Canada.
Sam remembers one conversation so unbelievably clearly. It was one of the main reasons that he decided to dust off the shield.
Harley. It’s always Harley. The kid gets under his skin and never leave. Annoying little bug honestly.
“He left it to you. He put it in his will that you’d get the shield. That means he knew you’d do the right thing.” Harley said to him one day in the compound.
It was late at night, or early in the morning, the beginning days all blended together. And by beginning days, that means all the days.
It was dark, he was out on the roof looking up at the stars. During the five years he’d find his way outside at night to look at them. It was a comfort thing. He remembers star gazing with Sarah when they were little.
“What hell is the right thing Harley? Because it’s a different thing with every person I ask.” It was silent for a moment as Harley sat down. Beside him on the padded part of the roof Sam often lay on. Lila made Shuri install it for tanning.
“Of course it will be. Everyone’s got a different perspective on what’s right and what’s wrong. You ask a Christian it’s not to sin or to follow God. You ask a criminal it’s theft or murder.” Harley said not looking over at Sam just staring up at the bright stars above them. “But, from how I see it, I don’t know Steve but, I don’t think he cared about what everyone else thought was right.” There was a beat of silence as if Harley was making some sort of dramatic pause for effect. He probably was, stupid kid. “I think he only cared about what you thought was right.” He hadn’t looked at it quite like that.
Sam had been trying to listen to everyone except Steve. He was trying to please the governments, what was left of them. He was trying to please Bucky. He was trying to please Peter, and Rhodes, and everyone else in the god damn world, except Steve.
There was also another factor. A big one.
“Harley,” he looked over at the seventeen year old who stared back, “what if he hates me for doing something I think is right?” Sam continued to stare while Harley sighed and gazed back up at the sky.
“It’s okay to be scared. Shows you’re human. Humanity shows you know what’s right and wrong.” Harley said but turned to look at Sam continuing before the other could interrupt. “He chose you, because he knows you. Because you’re good Sam.” Harley said smiling but Sam shook his head looking away.
“What if I’m not good enough?”
“You keep saying what if. You’re not gonna know until you try.”
“And if I fail?”
Harley sighed sitting up Sam following so they could look each other in the eye. Harley just smiled once again. It was so warm and comforting.
“I know you won’t. But if you do…” stupid kid with his stupid dramatic pauses, “I’ll be there. Always. So will Peter, and Lila, and Shuri, and Bruce, and Rhodey, and Vision, and Loki even if you don’t want him to be. And I know for a fact Bucky will always be there.” Harley said and Sam scoffed looking away shaking his head.
“You can’t know he will.” Harley bit his lip and concealed his smirk as Sam turned back to him again.
“I do, because you've always been there for him. But the point, is that I know you can. I believe in you.”
Sam looked into Harley's eyes in that moment and he'd known he could do it. He'd do it for Harley, not just for him though, for all the people of color who needed him to be as well. He'd do it for AJ and Cass.
He became Captain America not long after that, there was push back. Of course there was, he was a black man wearing the stars and stripes. It didn't stop him though he kept going. When they brought everyone back Sam's first thought was not about Steve and how he'd feel about this.
It wasn't until they got to the hospital and Sam saw Steve in a non battlefield setting that he thought about it a little. Not a lot because of Peter almost dying and all but he thought about it a little. After everyone was better ish, he thought about it a lot more.
So here he was after their first real mission together since the blip, standing, staring, awkward, face to face, in the living room. Steve just gave him a warm smile and glanced out the window, of course the dude wasn't feeling awkward.
“Steve, I uh, about the whole, me... being ya know, Captain America.” Sam didn't intent to offer the shield back to Steve. If the man asked for it though... that could be different. He wasn't sure what he'd do if Steve wanted it back.
“I've seen the videos. The news articles, the interviews...” Steve trailed off and looked back at Sam a softer, smaller, more proud smile on his face this time. “Proud of you man. You don't need to hear it I know that but I am. Don't let anyone take this from you. You're a better Captain America then I am.” Steve said a serious look on his face now.
“No, Steve—“ Sam tried to interrupt with an argument but Steve shook his head.
“I'm serious Sam.” Steve said making sure their eyes were connected. “A few people—only Lila actually—told me that you didn't want it in the beginning.”
Sam looked away not wanting to see the disappointed look on Steve's face he knew would be there. This man gave him the shield and he hadn't wanted it. He was going to give it up before Harley, AJ and Cass told him not to.
“You're gonna be the best Captain America uncle Sam. All my friends are so jealous!”
“That's one of the reasons I know you're going to be better. You're going to—you already have stood up for what you believe in in so many different ways. Also because you're true to yourself in a way that I never was.” Steve turned back to look out the window and Sam frowned looking up at the previous Captain America.
“What the hell does that mean Steven?” Sam said trying to catch Steve's eyes but the man just smirked turning and walking away from Sam who stood confused.
“My advice Sam!” He said stopping at the door to leave the room. “Don't let him go.” Steve left Sam to stand there for many minutes until Harley found him still trying to pull himself together.
—
Laura and Clint brought Pepper and Morgan over for dinner one day after having seen how much Lila and Nate talk to her. They expected Tony to come along but he wasn't standing at the door when they answered, they only found Pepper and Morgan. Pepper told him why he shouldn't come along and he understood, to an extent.
The dinner wasn't as awkward as Lila thought it would be when her parents said they'd invited the two over. Pepper understood why it would be and she made sure it wasn't. She was comfortable and talked to the two of them without hesitation. Answered all their questions and they slowly got more comfortable throughout dinner.
After dinner Pepper sat at the table with Clint and Laura while the kids were in the living room playing video games. Pepper watched them with a smile on her face. Then of course she turned back to the two parents.
“I hope there won't be any hostility between us. Is that what this dinner is about?” She asked hoping that they could get past this.
“No! God no!” Laura let out a nervous chuckle Clint doing the same although he seemed a bit less nervous.
“We just hadn't talked to you much before, you didn't really know us all that well—“ Clint started before his wife interrupted him.
“We wanted to thank you. For taking Nate in, for being there for Lila.” Laura said giving Pepper a warm thankful smile.
“Peter thought of them when he came back, they were here for twenty three days before he came for them. There was so much chaos in the world, so many things to deal with, and think about, Peter pulled everyone together. Everyone was trying to get you all back so quickly, he understood that there were things they needed to do before that. The world was falling apart he was one of the people who helped put it back together. He also continued to look for an answer to bring you all back for five years when we'd given up. Yes, I cared for Nate and Lila, and it was not trouble at all, but Peter helped them more than me. He got their parents back, he brought them to me in the first place, Sam and Bucky helped all of them too. I hope you plan to thank them as well.” Pepper said to which Laura and Clint nodded glad to know about how their daughter and son came into her care and who had helped along the way.
They asked more about the five years and how their two children left behind had been in those years. Pepper gladly told them stories and showed them photos, as well as videos, on her phone of the kids. Laura and Clint were sad that they'd missed these years with their two children but were happy to know that those years weren't wasted by their children. They were grateful to know that their kids were happy.
—
Thor wasn't someone who liked to lose. Loki knew that about his brother and he'd never truly seen his brother lose. To actually know—to have witnessed it first hand—it was... not a shock he was just saddened by it. His brother took even the small things to heart, even the things that weren't his fault.
Through the first few months Loki made sure that Thor knew he wasn't at fault for Thanos winning five years ago. Thor seemed to just ignore him and continue on with his day every time. One day though, Loki finally got his brother to speak about it.
“Look around brother!” He yelled when Loki wouldn't let up. “I let our people parish. I let Asgard parish.” He growled moving for the door but Loki got in the way.
“You did not do these things. Thanos killed our people. Ragnarok was to save our people.” Loki said but Thor scoffed shaking his head.
“This is not the quality of life I wish for our people Earth is beautiful but I wish for us to have a planet as we once did. One that is ours.” Thor finally expressed and there was a silent moment between the two of them.
“Let's find one then.” Loki said to which Thor tilted his head. “I know the Mantis, raccoon, and Nebula well, I'm sure they will help us find one.” Loki said to which Thor looked at his brother with joyful eyes.
“Thank you brother!”
Loki nodded about to turn away but he stopped and saw the happy smile Thor had on. He moved forward and wrapped his arms around his older brother hoping the hug would be welcomed. It was long awaited for Loki.
Thor smiled sighing in content as he wrapped his own arms around his younger brother. Long awaited and so very satisfying. They haven't truly hugged since they were kids. Loki smiled into Thor's chest while the older held him tight.
—
Wanda at first was unsure about how to approach Vision. She of course wanted to hug him, wanted to kiss him, wanted to hold him for the rest of time. But Vision had made the first move to reunite with her. It was before going to the hospital to see how Peter was doing.
Vision had pulled her away from her path to follow Steve and Natasha. He smiled down at her softly cupping her face with his cold dirty hands. She didn't take her eyes off him as she placed hers on his forearms and his face. Her eyes welled up with tears and he just continued to smile at his love.
“I have missed you Wanda.”
She then lifted her hand and he closed her eyes leaning his head down toward her just slightly. Her red magic twisted between her fingers and connected to his forehead where the mind stone used to be. Now all that was there was a golden gem that was the source of his power.
Wanda let out a shaky relieved breath.
“I can feel you.” She said smiling while opening her eyes and he took her hand as her power stopped flowing. He kissed her palm and once again smiled down at his love.
“And I you darling.” Their lips connected and it was like the fireworks of a fourth of July. Like the first kiss they had ever shared with one another. Sweet, loving, calm, passionate. All the things they needed to feel in this very moment. With each other, feeling each other.
Wanda has nightmares for a long time after that. Dreams of waking up to empty, endless nothingness and pain. Dreams of Vision, bright colors of him dulled, head caved in just asking why she is so scared as he tries to take her down into darkness.
Every time she wakes Vision is there, always. His colors not dulled, his head as normal as Shuri had rebuilt it to be. Wanda had thanked the girl for bringing him back. She had just told the other to thank Peter instead. That he had insisted to try and bring Vision back for when she got back.
Vision would always comfort her when she woke from a terrible nightmare. He would hold her and let her read into his mind over and over while only thinking of them together.
Sometimes when he would hold her he would be silent and just let her feel him. Sometimes he would tell her over and over that he was right here, that he would never leave her. Sometimes he would speak of the thought he had over the time she was gone. He would speak of a small town where they would settle down. Where they could be normal. A nice house, good friends, neighbors, maybe even a child or two. She liked the last idea.
—
When Sarah came back Sam dropped everything. Almost everything, everything except Harley and Peter. It had been only a few days since she got back. In those few days she was shaken. Sam called her the moment he got the chance, the moment they knew Peter was alright, in the car on the way home actually. He left that night to go to her leaving Bucky to take care of the kids.
“Is mom back uncle Bucky?” Cass had asked as he tucked both him and AJ into bed.
Sam had told them in a very short rushed way before he left. No wonder they needed clarification. He sat down on AJ's bed sighing.
“Yeah, yeah, we got everyone back buddy. So that means Harley's sister, that means Morgan's dad, that means everyone who went away five years ago.” He said looking at both of them and they seemed to understand they just didn't seem to know how to react.
“Does that mean Harley's going away?” AJ asked and it made Bucky's heart hurt because he didn't want that. Harley was going down to Tennessee to see his mom and sister. He loved Harley so much he knew that AJ, Cass, and Sam loved him too. But if that's what Harley wanted he couldn't stop the kid.
“I don't know AJ. But I do know that he loves you too much to go away forever if he does. So he'll always come visit you.”
Bucky smiled down at the two boys and said goodnight to them both before leaving the room. He made sure he was downstairs and out of rang of their little ears so he could call Sam. It rang a few times before he picked up.
Sam was already at Sarah's she's gone to sleep and Sam was actually just about to call Bucky. They'd kept Sarah's house, and that stupid boat Sam loved so much. They struggled for a while but they stayed on their feet.
“She needs time.”
“That's understandable. She just blinked and it was five years later. Her kids are five years older, living with us in a different state.”
Sam sighed through the phone and winced. He hoped she didn't need that much time. Not when her boys have been missing her for years.
“I'm gonna come home tomorrow. Just gonna make sure she's okay before I do.”
“Of course Sam. Make sure she knows she can come here any time she needs.”
“I will. Love you Buck.”
“Love you too Samuel.” There was an annoyed groan on the other side of the phone before Bucky hung up with a smirk on his face.
Sarah showed up two weeks later unannounced. Bucky was home alone with the kids, AJ, Cass, Emma, Morgan was visiting, and Peter was with Harley so they were up at the compound. Sam was out getting groceries intending to have all the kids as well as Peter and Harley at the dinner table tonight.
Bucky had given him a list when he offered to do the shopping. He knew Sam would either forget something or “that's a stupid item we don't need it” like all the other lovely times that Sam didn't know what something was. Bucky thought it was irritating in the most adorable loving way.
Bucky was sitting on the backyard porch reading while listening to some soft music that always got Sam telling him that he needed a new Spotify play list. He didn't know what this “spot a fly” was but he didn't need any of it. He was perfectly fine with his old time music. He didn't tell Sam that he sometimes listened to those few songs that Harley downloaded on his phone.
The kids were playing on the dock that Bucky had installed a latter on so they could get back onto the dock after him helping AJ one to many times because he couldn't pull himself up like Cass could. They just kept screaming and laughing as they jumped into the water and swam around seeing how far they could before—
“Hey! Cass if you go out to far there won't be an Xbox for you to come play on when your done!” The boy swam back in as the girls giggled loudly.
“Taking the video games away is a pretty good punishment.” Bucky whipped around to find Sarah standing there purse over her shoulder looking the same as in the photos Sam always showed him.
“Sarah. I didn't know you were coming.” Bucky said standing up and she nodded taking a deep breath in.
“Neither did I. I mean, I booked the plane ticket, I took the taxi here but I didn't know if I'd be able to walk through your front door. You didn't answer when I knocked and it was unlocked so—“ Bucky smiled interrupting her.
“It's all good. You're family.” Bucky said and they stood there for a moment before Bucky realized. “I'm Bucky! Sam's—“
“Boyfriend. I know he told me.” Bucky smiled looking away then looked around.
“I'll get you a chair, you're welcome to go down there to them if you want. They're your kids of course you're welcome—Jesus Christ Barnes.” He muttered to himself pulling a char out so that it faced the kids down below. She just smirked and thanked him.
“Mom!”
With that she was tackled by her boys and Bucky watched in both a sad and happy way. He was so glad that the boys had their mom back but he also didn't want things to change.
Then Emma and Morgan proceeded to try and climb his legs and he smiled. Change wasn't always bad though.
Dinner was beautiful that night. Bucky and Sarah bonded over cooking for the family. She got to meet Peter and Harley they loved her so did the two girls.
Bucky didn't talk all that much during dinner. He just watched everyone interact with each other and thought about how good this felt. How loving and how much of a family this felt to him. he never thought he'd get here but here he was, with Sam his nephews who were basically his own. With Harley, his son, and Harley's sister who would become his daughter soon.
He could only think of one thing that could make this all better than it was now.
"Hey Buck whatcha doin' out here? Inside is much more fun and definitely warmer. Not that you need it, ya human furnace." Sam said his cold hands going under the back of Bucky's shirt making goosebumps appear.
"Knew you'd follow me out here. Wanted to get you alone." Bucky said leaning back from the railing and turning to Sam.
"Oh, bad boy Barnes," Sam said smirking as he leaned up to catch Bucky's mouth.
"No you idiot." Sam pouted making Bucky roll his eyes. "I just..." He looked down his pocket feeling heavy and his planned words seeming to leave his brain. Sam got concerned at the serious tone.
"Everything okay babe?" Bucky nodded.
"Everything is amazing that's the point." Sam frowned. "And I want it to be amazing forever."
"So do I."
"No Sam I want you."
"I thought you said I was an idiot."
"No not like that. Well, yes like that. Definitely like that but I mean like—" He cut himself looking up into Sam's eyes. The amusement was there like it always was when he fucked with Bucky but there was also a hint of confusion. He was still wondering what this conversation as about.
Bucky took a deep breath trying to slow his rapidly beating heart. He then pulled the box that was weighing him down from his pocket. He swallowed the lump in his throat before getting down on one knee. Sam went wide eyed as Bucky looked up at him.
"Sam—"
"What the fuck—"
"I love you—"
"What the extra fuck—"
"Will you—"
"Stop—" Bucky stopped himself before opening the box. He looked up at Sam hoping to find some sort of explanation in his facial expression. There was not.
"If you don't want this—"
"No, I do it's just..." Sam said squeezing Bucky's hand with the left that was holding his right. He let out a huff that sounded like a laugh. "The other day Steve told me not to let you go and it got me thinking and there's a box just like that in my bedside table upstairs so you're an asshole for beating me to this, you absolute dick." Sam said and Bucky smiled letting out a chuckle.
"So that's a yes?" Bucky triumphantly smirked up at his lover who shook his head smiling.
"Yes, of course." Sam sighed as if someone was making him do this. But then Bucky put the silver ring on him standing as he did.
Sam smirked hand moving to the back of Bucky's neck to pull him into a kiss. Their smiles broke the kiss as the cold metal made more goosebumps appear on the back of Bucky's neck. There was cheering from inside the house and the two glared at the children and adults who encouraged them. Change wasn't always bad. Change was good. Bucky loved this kind of change.