“Folks, this is Laura,” Clint introduced, as he held—who Y/n presumes is his wife—close to his side.
“I know all your names,” replied Laura, hesitantly and waved a dismissive hand.
Laura looked around the room.
Y/n could taste the awkward tension in the room on her tongue. She could even spot Tony next to her throwing out a small wave at the woman. She was standing between him and Bruce, still in her gear while leaning heavily on the beam to her left.
She tried to reciprocate the smile on Laura’s lips but could only muster a twitch of her lip. The exhaustion felt evident even to herself.
Which was fairly understandable considering she had just blown away half an (abandoned) industrial complex to bits only a few short hours ago. She hadn’t used her powers in a considerably long time; give or take half a century, so it was an unusual situation for her to say the least.
Suddenly she could hear multiple footsteps approaching.
Clint turned towards the door and said, “Ooh, incoming,” as a young boy and a girl came rushing down the stairs.
“Dad!” the girl exclaimed as Clint picked her up.
“Hi, sweetheart!” Clint greeted them. He pulled the older boy in for a hug, kissing his head, “Hey buddy! How you guys doing?”
The joy in his voice warmed Y/n up from the inside.
“These are…smaller agents,” Tony remarked.
Y/n wanted to roll her eyes but it would’ve taken effort she wasn’t sure she could dish out at that moment.
“Look at your face!” Clint placed another kiss on his daughter’s head before putting her down. “Oh, my goodness!”
“Did you bring Auntie Nat?” the girl asked, ever so sweetly.
“Why don’t you hug her and find out?” Natasha replied from the corner of the room. She stepped forward as the girl rushed towards her, picking her up in her arms.
“Sorry for barging in on you,” Steve apologized sincerely, with his hands resting on his belt. It was his ‘Captain America’ stance and she knew why he was wearing it. He was realising that he knew very little about his team, about the people he had been fighting with. So he was putting up the composed facade to stop himself from breaking at the seams.
“Yeah, we would have called ahead, but we were busy having no idea that you existed.” Tony retorted.
Natasha put the little girl down and stood between Bruce and Clint, who had his arms around his son and Laura on either side.
“Yeah, well Fury helped me set this up when I joined,” he answered. “He kept it off SHIELD’s files, I’d like to keep it that way.” He looked at Y/n. “I figure it’s a good place to lay low,“ he added.
There were some more conversations, but Y/n had mostly zoned out for it. She could spot Thor leaving, passing them by and Steve following behind, before she lost her resolve, almost falling to the ground.
“Hey, hey. Easy there, tiger.” Tony said, catching her quickly. He put his arm around her waist and pulled her’s over his shoulder. “Anywhere I can put down the suspected Manchurian Candidate?” He asked.
“I didn’t betray the damn country, Tony,” she chided.
“The guest bedroom’s upstairs,” Laura stated as she began leading the way.
“I said ‘suspected’, didn’t I?” He threw back, cocking his brow.
“I said ‘suspected’, didn’t I?” She mimicked back to him.
Tony and Y/n slowly made their way up the stairs.
“Glorious come back, Stark,” Tony mocked. “One for the history books. You know, the ones that you’re a part of?”
Well, Tony made his way up the stairs; Y/n was just dead weight he was carrying.
“You’re going to start making old people jokes on me now, aren’t you?” Y/n sighed.
“I’ve been holding back for decades,” he stated. “Do you know how much self-control that took?”
For any other mortal man? Not much. For Tony? Almost the size of Texas.
“Come on, cut me some slack,” she whined. “A 16-year-old just fuc—” Oh fuck, there’s kids around, “fudged with my head and made me go all Elsa.”
They finally stepped into the room. Laura fussed around, clearing up the bed for her.
“I’ll get you some water,” she suggested politely. “Would you like anything else?”
Tony helped Y/n onto the bed. “No no. Thank you. You’ve got a lovely home… I wish we could have met under better circumstances,” Y/n answered with as much warmth as she could muster.
“I didn’t think I was ever going to meet any of you, to be honest. So I’ll take what I can get,” she replied with a kind smile. “I’ll get you some pain killer, just in case.” And with that, she left the room.
‘Well, Clint got lucky,” Y/n noted, laying down on the bed, looking up at the ceiling. She brought her arm up over her eyes to cover up the bright sunlight pouring in which made her head hurt worse.
“Amen,” Tony replied as he sat down on the foot of the bed. His hand came to rest on her feet as he looked ahead.
She knew exactly what he was thinking but wanted to give him time to compose his words before rebuking him.
Silence fell between the siblings.
“I’m sorry—” Tony began but was promptly cut off.
“Wasn’t your fault,” she said simply, meaning it.
She could feel Tony’s eyes fall on her then. So she pulled her arm up, off her eyes. “They’re all looking at you like you’re a ticking time bomb. If I hadn’t—”
“Playing with things you did not understand? Yeah, that was your fault. Your hubris.” She looked at him dead in the eyes as she said the next words, “But whatever happened out there, me losing control? That wasn’t on you.”
“Wasn’t on you either,” Tony reassured her.
“We’ll have to see about that,” she sighed, looking up at the ceiling. “Now go away, Stark. I need my beauty sleep.”
The last thing she could hear was Tony laughing as she let all the exhaustion consume her. And unlike most days, sleep came hammering down on her with the weight of a hundred freight cars, pulling her down like gravity.
But her sleep was far more restless than it had ever been before. She woke up, gasping and clutching onto her chest. She sat up instantly, almost feeling like her heart would beat out of her chest.
“Are you okay?” Asked a small voice next to her.
She turned her head to see Clint’s daughter looking at her, peeking out from the doorway.
“I’ve been better,” Y/n replied.
“You fight auntie Nat and Daddy?” she asked.
“Sometimes,” Y/n answered as she began climbing out of the bed. The moment she put her feet on the floor, she realised they were naked. Having just woken up and still lacking brain function all she could do was stare at her feet accusingly while grumbling, “I am so sure I used to have shoes.”
There was a pat on her thigh. She turned to look at the suspect only to find the girl looking up at her, while simultaneously pointing at the end of the bed where her shoes were lying on the ground.
“Thanks,” Y/n remarked, picking them up. “I’m Y/n.”
“Lila,” she replied with a kind smile.
“Nice to make your acquaintance, Lila,” Y/n said, offering her hand which Lila promptly accepted, shaking it. "Good assist,” she remarked.
A smile crawled its way up to Y/n’s face.
She made her way outside onto the porch with Lila in tow.
Barton was working on building the railing with his son as Lila rushed past Y/n and joined them.
“Hey, look who’s up!” Clint exclaimed when he spotted her. He had changed into casuals, she noticed. So had Steve and Tony who were a few feet away from them, on the field.
“Thanks for letting us rain on your super-secret parade. Barton,” Y/n making her way down the steps. “Appreciate it.”
“Yeah well, can you show your gratitude by fixing the tractor?” Clint asked jovially.
“I’ll get my best man on it,” Y/n answered as she made her way over to where Steve and Tony were chopping firewood. She could see from the way they held themselves, they were both on edge. No doubt having some philosophical debate over whether to create or not to create artificial intelligence using alien technology. “Tony!” She called out, “Go fix the tractor.”
Tony cocked his head back to look at her but she was too busy looking at Steve, who was finally looking at her. He had avoided her gaze since he’d calmed her down from her very powerful and very destructive breakdown (courtesy of one Wanda Maximoff). She didn’t know if preferred the blatant cold shoulder or the look of plain hurt she was currently witnessing in his eyes.
“You sure?” Tony asked.
“Positive,” she reassured him. She had to have this conversation eventually. And she would’ve preferred knowing sooner, rather than later if she was still going to be able to have the man she loved or not.
Tony turned around. “Don’t take from my pile,” he warned Steve before he began walking in the direction of the shed, behind her. He pressed a kiss to her cheek as he passed her by. Her eyes fell close at the contact as her lips curled up by a bit.
It was his way of telling her, no matter what happens, she’d always have him.
The sound of his whistle made her turn her head. “I’m right behind you,” He promised.
“I know,” she answered.
And with that, he turned around and walked away.
“How are you feeling?” Steve asked.
Honestly? She felt like absolute shit. Her body felt like it was on fire, exhaustion was ingrained into her bones. Her head was running in all directions and her heart was beating faster than she would have liked. She felt exposed and vulnerable but more than all that she felt scared.
She had something here, after ages and ages of nothing; she had something, someone. And she loved him, with all that she had and all that she was.
“We can skip the niceties,” she answered, “jump straight to what you want to know.”
“I am asking because I want to know,” Steve said, and his voice felt almost painfully soft. He managed to throw in so much emotion into the few words, Y/n could feel her tough exterior break. But then again, she never could keep it up when it came to him. His eyes were always so soft and kind, so damn beautiful, she could not help but cave, every single time.
“I’m fine… Exhausted. But fine.”
There was silence then. They stood there, looking at each other, only a few steps apart, in utter silence.
Until he stepped forward, and ever so carefully, brought his hands to cup her face. Her hands made their way onto his sides, automatically. Her body molded to his without thought. And in his arms, she felt like she could finally give in and let her armor fall.
Rubbing comforting circles on her cheeks with his thumb, he said, “You scared me for a second there.” His voice was lower than a whisper. She wouldn’t have heard it if it weren’t for her chest pressing into his.
“Didn’t know Captain America could get scared,” she joked. Her eyes were searching his, for a hint of a smile but all she could find was worry and… guilt?
“Didn’t know I’d ever have to see you, like that… Didn’t know I’d have to see you afraid,” he answered solemnly.
And with those words she let the dam break. Tears began making their way down her face and in an instant he was kissing them away.
“I didn’t want to hurt anyone,” she choked out.
“You didn’t,” he assured her in between kisses. “You didn’t.”
“But I could hav—”
She was cut off by his lips crashing into hers.
While the movement was rough, where their lips met it was nothing but tenderness. His lips began moving against her slowly, while her hands tried to pull him closer and he obliged—as best he could—without hesitation. She needed him, she needed as much of him as she could have. She wanted him to consume her so all her exhaustion and fear would fall away, leaving only Steve. But more than that she wanted to be close enough for them to become one so she wouldn’t have to lose him.
Her tongue licked his lips, politely asking for admittance, and he gave it willingly without thought, pulling her closer still. Their tongues danced around each other and she could feel herself melting away with each flick. The kiss was a culmination of too many things at once, she could taste his worry, fear, and… this guilt that she didn’t want to address. Meanwhile, she was sure he could taste her relief, exhaustion, and panic. It was pure need; to feel the other, for both of them to make sure what they had in front of them was real.
When they broke apart, they didn’t move away. Their foreheads came to rest together, eyes still connected.
“Were you ever going to tell me?” Steve asked, finally addressing the elephant in the field. His tone wasn’t accusatory, only curious.
“You will come to find out, hiding it forever was never a plausible option,” she answered, diplomatically, her eyes falling shut.
“That’s not what I asked.”
“I thought—I didn’t think I’d have you long enough for me to have to,” she told him, honestly. She commended herself for her voice breaking only a bit at the end.
His reply was a heavy exhale. “You have me, doll,” he told her, kissing the top of her head and pulling her into his chest. “You’ll always have me.”
Now, Steven Grant Rogers was a great many things, but a good liar wasn’t one of them.
Y/n though was a fucking expert. So she told herself she believed him.
“Ah, young love…. Oh, wait.” They turned their head to see Fury, stood there in all his glory. He was wearing a teasing smile on his face, proud of his own inside joke, which wasn’t going to stay an inside joke in a couple of minutes.
“If you’re done with your Thelma and Louise moment, we’ve got some shit to do,” Tony chided, walking up the stairs and into the house.
“Christ on a cracker, Tony. Watch your foul mouth. You know how my mister gets,” Y/n teased, finally feeling a smile crawl its way onto her lips.
Steve’s head fell back in faint annoyance, as he sighed heavily, “Am I ever gonna live this down?”
Y/n and Tony only laughed in response, which was a clear enough answer.
The rest of the team greeted Fury, grabbed a bite to eat, and then eventually situated themselves around the kitchen.
Natasha sat on the dining table, Bruce stood behind her, leaning on the kitchen counter. Steve stood opposite to them, behind the table, leaning against the wall to his left. Fury was at the other end of the kitchen, while Clint was standing a couple of steps to Steve’s right. Tony was standing at the head of the dining table and Y/n was sitting on the opposite end.
Everyone waited patiently for answers. But no one dared to make a noise.
Until “Can someone just ask and get it over with?” Y/n called out, exasperated.
“Fine,” Natasha spoke up and Y/n had to admit, if she were placing bets, she would’ve bet on Natasha being the one to ask. She never shied away from a confrontation. She was too tough for it. “What are you?”
“I don’t know,” Y/n answered honestly, pulling at the sleeves of the sweats she was now in.
“You don’t know?” Clint asked, confused, with his brows furrowed.
“Well, I know I’m not human… not entirely at least,” she explained.
This was gonna be a tough fucking conversation. A long fucking story.
So she gathered her breath, letting it out audibly, and began, “Let’s take this from the top… It started out the same way it did for most of the people in this room, in a lab. Captain America was a shiny, strong toy and every nation wanted one of their own. Now, I, on the other hand, was a broke, angry little thing when a couple men came to the factory I worked at, talking about how they’d pay a bunch of money to anyone who would participate in these experiments they had going on. So I signed up; a couple injections and stupid little tests seemed like an easy cash grab. And it was all dandy in the beginning until… one by one the volunteers began to disappear.” She looked at Tony, the only one in the room who knew her whole story from beginning to end. “You have to understand where I’m from… In Madripoor that really isn’t a very remarkable occurrence and well, the money was too good. So I kept going back for more until I was the last one standing. They realized I was their golden goose.” Tony walked over to stand next to her.
“Then they obviously did not let me leave. Tests got worse, more painful. But then one day they wanted to try something new; electrocution… Which turned out to be a very very stupid idea cause that made something spark inside me and suddenly I was blowing up. I think that mixed with all the things they were dosing me up with triggered whatever powers I had inside,” she said with a hollow smile.
“Was it Hydra?” Steve asked, hesitantly, his hands still crossed over his chest while his face was etched with agony.
“No no. Well, not at first. It was the government of Madripoor. But after my powers got triggered, they couldn’t control me, so then they sold me off to Hydra,” she answered, her head falling. She hated this part. “And then it got so much worse.” Tony’s hand came to rest on her shoulder, “They made me do their bidding, obviously as all evil organizations do. A mindless assassin they could control without issue,” she could feel Steve’s eyes boring into her but she didn’t have the strength to look up just yet. “They did have issues though, cause they couldn’t brainwash me; I mean they tried, but electrotherapy just juiced up my powers and I went on a rampage, took down half the base until they came rolling in with tear gas and tranquilizers… So they brought in an enforcer.” Then she did look up Steve and both of them knew who the enforcer was.
The Winter Soldier.
She could see Steve’s face drain of color as he connected all the dots.
“There were other subjects there too; we fought. Whoever won ‘trained’ with the enforcer, and whoever stopped breathing, lost. I think they were thinning the crop,” she added, somewhat lost in the memories. She hated this part with a ferocity she could not put words to. So she moved along. “Anyway, it was all very brutal and tragic, you get the picture,” she said somewhat jovially as Tony’s grip on her shoulder tightened. “Eventually Peggy barged in, got me out… I didn’t really have a home or identity to speak of; I was an orphan from the streets of Madripoor. So, Howard took me in, gave me a home. And Peggy gave me a place to belong. I ended up joining S.H.I.E.L.D. cause what else was I gonna do with my skills?” She scoffed. “But I didn’t use my powers. I was—Well, I was scared to… I haven’t used them since I escaped the Hydra facility. Not substantially, at least.” She breathed out, “Until now…”
Another silence fell on the room.
Until Natasha broke it again, “Y/n, you just said Peggy Carter broke you out…” Y/n nodded for her to continue, knowing exactly where it was going. “But she retired from field duty in the ‘60s.”
Y/n said nothing because it wasn’t a question. It was an insinuation… and a correct one at that. So she just shrugged.
“Y/n,” Clint began, very confused. “Ho—How old are you?”
“Have some manners, Barton! You should never say that to a lady,” Tony chided mockingly.
Y/n knew he was trying to make her laugh. And it worked. “Let’s just say I prefer dating men my age,” she answered looking back at Steve.
“But you look—you look younger than all of us,” Bruce remarked from his corner.
“Why thanks, Bruce. You’re very kind.” Y/n smiled. “It’s my powers I think,” she explained.
“Which are what exactly?” Bruce asked, his curiosity was evident. “You looked like you were… glitching from one place to another.”
“It—It’s like teleportation of sorts. Except I open a portal into another dimension, fall into it and open it somewhere else. To anyone else, it looks like I’ve… glitched—for lack of a better term—from one place to another. When in reality—”
“You’re traveling in the other dimension,” Bruce summarized. “You can open it anywhere? Travel, anywhere?”
She shook her head, “I can only open it with my hands, but once inside I can travel as far as I want—”
“—coming out wherever you want,” Burce completed.
She nodded. “But I need to know the layout, have it in my eyesight or I could pop out in the middle of a wall or something… which isn’t pretty,” her brows furrowed, remembering. “Trust me.”
“Neat, ain’t it?” Tony beamed.
He always saw her as more than she was. He always was in awe of her when she didn’t feel like really did anything to deserve it.
“But it seems instantaneous,” Bruce argued, his face contorted in the way it usually did when he was focusing. The scientist in him was having a field day, she could tell.
“Time moves faster in this dimension,” she explained. “That’s why I think I age… slower.”
“Wait!” Clint exclaimed pointing at her and Tony, “That means you’re the oldest—not Tony.”
“That actually makes a lot more sense,” Steve said evenly, nodding his head. Simultaneously Natasha said, “It explains so much.” Bruce nodded as well as he said, “Answers so many questions.”
Y/n couldn’t help but chuckle, especially when Tony squealed, throwing up his hands in mock offense. “Hey! I played my part of the Bart to her Lisa Simpson pretty damn well, alright? I heard no complaints before, you traitors.”
“But wait,” Natasha interrupted Tony’s rant, “When we met, Fury had to convince you to join S.H.I.E.L.D.”
Fury let out a snort from behind them, “She left back in the ‘70s. Said, it all got too bureaucratic for her taste.”
“Hank Pym’s god-awful haircut didn’t help,” she muttered to herself.
“So I take it, you knew?” Steve asked rhetorically.
Fury shrugged in response.
“Why do you think he sent me to recruit you for the Avengers Initiative?” Y/n asked Steve while looking intently at Fury who was wearing a cocky smile.
“Just thought you two crazy kids would get along,” Fury said coyly.
Steve shook his head, but Y/n could see his lips curve up at the corner. But then he looked up all of a sudden. She could tell what the spark in his eyes meant, so she waited. And he didn’t disappoint. “What about your arms, though?” He asked suddenly. “They were covered in a—in an armor, of sorts?”
She looked at him, leaning back on the chair, “Well, that one’s a little harder to explain.”
“You calling us dumb, Stark?” Natasha chided lightly.
Y/n laughed, “No, no. I wouldn’t dare.” She felt a weight lift watching her friend smile back at her amiably. “Okay—Um… I guess you could say I have free reign in this dimension; I can create anything I want while I’m in there. So, if I can extend the portal and mold it around my arms—”
“—You can create armor… or anything you want,” Bruce finished.
Y/n nodded in assent. “Burns me out, but yeah. I can.”
“Awesome,” Steve remarked with fascination. He said almost to himself, the word feeling foreign on his lips, she still liked it though. But when his eyes met hers, they both broke out in a fond smile.
“But, why wouldn’t you tell us?” Bruce asked.
“We’re a room full of experiments,” Steve stated, “If there was anyone who’d get it—”
“—you’re looking at ‘em,” Natasha finished.
Y/n breathed in heavily in fear of the daunting task of wording her emotions.
Sensing her anxiety, Tony whistled. She looked up to meet his eyes.
“I’m right behind you, Stark.” He winked at her with his signature ‘Tony Stark’ smile. And she couldn’t help but reciprocate it as some of the tension fell away.
She looked around the room and then said, “I didn’t want to become a test subject again.”
The silence that proceeded hung heavy amongst the crowd.
Apart from a handful of people, like Fury, Peggy, and the Starks, no one had known who she truly was. What she truly was. It was by design because the fear of being strapped down to a chair again still kept her up at night.
“You won’t,” Steve spoke with so much determination, it was almost a promise. His eyes told her as much as they met.
“Keeping secrets is my whole job profile,” Natasha chimed in, with a comforting yet smug smile.
“I’ve kept this a secret,” Clint said motioning to his house, “what’s one more?”
“I think it’s safe to say if Tony can keep his mouth shut, so can the rest of us,” Bruce added with mirth.
Everyone let out soft chuckles, as Tony objected, “I resent that insinuation.”
“Alright with that overly emotional cathartic moment out of the way… Can we focus on Ultron?” Y/n asked.
She could hear Laura and the kids making their way down the stairs as Fury began giving them a rundown of the situation.