Pain is all they know
When Robin reaches the top of the stairs she pauses and takes a few moments to take some deep breaths. Getting angry helped nobody in this situation.
Robin opens the door to Natasha’s room. The girl is waiting just inside her room, her hands grasped behind her back and her head bowed.
“Follow me,” Robin tells her and Natasha jerks forward to follow after Robin. Robin leads her down the hallway and into her office. She closes the door to the office behind them before moving toward the umbrella stand in the corner. “Tell me why you’re going to get swats.”
“I disobeyed an order,” Natasha replies in a hushed tone, her back straight as she glances at Robin picking a bamboo stick.
“What else?” Robin asked, wrapping her fingers around the handle of one of the thin sticks and pulls it from its place nestled with the others.
“I…” Natasha hesitates, shifting slightly on her feet. “Yelled.” She said but her wavering voice betrays her confidence in her answer.
“And?” Robin turns to look at her, making her way toward her.
Natasha’s breath hitched as Robin approached. “I… don’t know, ma’am.” She finally whispers the admission.
“You destroyed part of our home,” Robin weights the thin bamboo stick in her hand. It was around three feet and her fingers easily touched wrapped around the handle. “You threw a plate.”
“Yes ma’am. I threw a plate. I apologize, ma’am.” Natasha nods her head obediently, refusing to look at Robin’s face.
“Put your hands against the wall and spread your legs shoulder width,” Robin orders. Natasha’s fingers move to the button on her jeans but Robin stops her. “I don’t want you to strip.”
Natasha knits her brow in confusion but scrambles to do just as Robin asked.
“I’m going to give you five swats. You will count each one out loud. If you miss one then we start over. Is that clear?” Robin glances down at her.
“Just five?” Natasha twists her head to glance at Robin before snapping her mouth shut and jerking to face the wall again.
Robin doesn’t hit her hard. She doesn’t beat her. She sends the first swat on Natasha’s lower back.
Natasha winces but doesn’t cry out, her voice steady as she replies. “One.”
Robin sends the next just below the first.
“Two.” Natasha counts.
Robin sends five swats from Natasha’s lower back to her upper thighs before dropping the stick back into place in the umbrella stand when she finishes. “Go stand in the corner.”
Natasha drops her hands from the wall and turns to look at her in surprise. “What?”
“Go stand in the corner and press your nose against the wall and think about what you did,” Robin instructs, pointing her finger at the corner of the room. Natasha peels away from the wall and shuffles over to the corner and hesitantly pressed her nose against the corner of the wall.
Robin takes a seat at her desk with a sigh, cradling her throbbing ribs. She closed her eyes and rand a hand through her hair.
Robin finally sighs after a few minutes and opens her eyes to glance at Natasha still in the corner of the room. “Come here.”
Natasha pulls away from the corner to stand in front of Robin. She’s schooled her face and stares at the spot on the wall just beside Robin’s face.
“I know that you are overwhelmed,” Robin said, turning in her chair to face her. “The move. Being stuck in a houseful of strangers. Being in a place that you don’t know with rules that have yet to be established is probably very scary for you.”
Natsha tilts her chin up. “I’m not scared.” She immediately retorts before shrinking in on herself.
Robin raised an eyebrow. “Do not lie to me, Natasha.” Robin chides. “You can get upset. You can even cry. I don’t mind. But you are not allowed to scream at us and you are not allowed to throw or break things.”
“Crying is a weakness,” Natasha parrots something that had been repeated to her so many times. Robin lets out a tired sigh as she shakes her head.
“Not here. For the next year, or however long that this mission lasts, you need to be able to express your feelings. You can cry, Natasha. I don’t care,” Robin watches as tears well up in the girl’s eyes but don’t yet fall. “I cannot read your mind. I need you to tell me that you are overwhelmed.”
Natasha takes a deep breath to steady her voice. “And then what?”
“I am your mother for the next years. I will help you however you need,” Robin drums her fingers on the arm of her office chair. “If you need space then I will give you space. If you want to be held then I will hold you.”
“I’m too old to be held,” Natasha said, another echo of what had been instilled in her mind.
Robin just arched an eyebrow. “I held you just the other night in the rocking chair.”
“Because you told me to!” Natasha defends herself, shrinking away. “I followed your orders!”
“Hey, shh. I’m not mad. I’m merely pointing it out. Nobody is too old to be held. Not you. Not Melina. Not even me,” Robin leans back in her chair and pats her lap. “Come here.”
“You’re hurt,” Natasha protests but her feet betray her and she shuffles closer.
“You saw Yelena on my lap earlier. Just don’t sit on my bad side,” Robin takes a deep breath and steels herself before pulling Natasha up to sit sideways on her lap.
“I don’t understand…” Natasha finally admits after sitting stiffly for a few moments. “Why do you keep-- touching me?”
“You are my daughter for the next year. It is essential to the mission. I am to provide you with all of the touching you want and need,” Something in the back of Robin’s mind tells her that it’s more than that, that Robin knows that this child is touch-starved and deserves kind touches.
“That I want?” Natasha echoes and Robin nods her head. “Anytime?”
“Anytime. You want to be touched or held then you can come to find me and I will hold you for as long as you like,” Robin knew it was dangerous to make promises like this but Natasha’s eyes are still glassy from unshed tears.
Natasha squints at her suspiciously and Robin doesn’t blame her. “Anytime?” Natasha repeats once again. “What do you want in exchange?” She finally questioned.
“I want you to be a good girl. I want you to listen to me and Melina,” Robin said, guiding Natasha to lean against her in the chair.
“You gave me swats but you only gave me five instead of fifty and you didn’t make me bleed or strip for it,” Natasha frowns, her head resting on Robin’s shoulder as her fingers fidget with the hem of her shirt. “And then you hold me and your touch doesn’t hurt and you don’t touch me in places I don’t like.”
“I did,” Robin inclines her head, wondering where Natasha was going with all of this but Natasha seemed to simply list what was going through her mind because she goes quiet.
“Have you calmed down now?” Robin asks after a few moments and Natasha stiffens back up slightly.
“Yes ma’am, sorry ma’am,” Natasha mumbles, ducking her head down to avoid looking at Robin.
“I’m not angry with you. You can cry if you want to,” Robin reminds her, reaching up to gently comb her fingers through the fiery hair on top of the child’s head. Natasha’s breath hitched and although there were no tears shed, Natasha does let out the occasional sniffle. Robin finally glances at the clock on the wall and finds that she had been up in the office for nearly forty minutes. “It’s nearly time for bed. You have school tomorrow.”
“I don’t want to get up yet,” Natasha’s voice cracks when she speaks, betraying the face she was letting herself barely cry as she sits up. She’s challenging Robin to see if the woman will keep her word. “You said--”
“Shh, I know what I said,” Robin replies, guiding Natasha’s head to rest against her shoulder again. “And although I don’t actually think you want more, I shall give you another ten minutes.”
Natasha is practically limp against Robin, fidgeting every so often in her hold. They’re interrupted by Melina entering the office.
“Yelena is in bed.” She informs Robin, glancing at Natasha before looking back up at Robin. “She should be too.”
Robin nods her head before looking down at Natasha. “Go get changed. I know you’re not carrying contraband so don’t wait for one of us to watch. I need to talk with Melina.”
Natasha, even though it hadn’t been the full ten minutes, slides off of Robin’s lap and shuffles around Melina to slip out the door.
“I thought you would have punished her,” Melina closed the door behind Natasha. “You coddler her far too much.”
“Don’t presume to know everything with only a few moments of observation,” Robin chides, rubbing a hand across the throbbing in her torso. “You know better than that.”
Melina clenches her jaw and lowers her head.
“She was punished. Just because the Red Room beats you into submission and doesn’t give a lick of concern afterward doesn’t mean that I’m going to do the same. I’m not like them, Melina,” Robin tells her before beckoning her closer. “Come here.”
Melina moves toward her and Robin pulls herself up to stand. “You and Natasha need to learn to get along.” She gently chides.
Melina is stiff in her hold and Robin sighs softly, gently swaying side to side and feels Melina unconsciously move with her. “Your first day of work is tomorrow.” Robin reminds her. “Are you nervous?”
“No.” Melina replies immediately but her voice is soft and Robin knows for a fact that it’s a lie. “I’ll complete the mission in a satisfactory manner.”
That wasn’t what Robin had asked but she lets it go for now, reaching up to cup the back of Melina’s neck. “You’ll need to drop Yelena and Natasha off tomorrow. I’ll pick them up. Is that okay with you?”
Melina nods her head, closing her eyes briefly. “Yes ma’am.”
“You can’t call me ma’am in public,” Robin tells her.
“Robin--” Melina hastily corrects herself at the slip-up.
“Don’t be afraid to use pet names,” Robin hums, her thumb gently stroking the nape of Melina’s neck. “It’s okay, baby.”
Melina gives a full-body flinch. “Don’t-- please don’t call me that.”
Robin frowned at the reaction. “I’m sorry.” She apologized softly. “I won’t call you that again. Are there any other names that you don’t like?”
“Just-- just baby,” Melina replies quietly. “You?”
“Don’t call me your pretty songbird or any variation of that,” Robin said. That nickname was reserved for General Dreykov. Nobody else used it. She hated it. “Can I call you sweet girl?”
Although Melina doesn’t look at her, her cheeks do pinken slightly. “ Yes. May I call you my love?”
Robin feels her face burn as she flushes but nods. “You can.”
It was quiet for a few moments. “My love?” Melina tests the words on her tongue. “I am… nervous for work tomorrow.”
“I know,” Robin moves the hand on the back of Melina’s neck to cup her cheek. “You will do well, sweet girl.”
Melina leans into the touch slightly. “This mission is slightly outside of my usual parameters.”
“Mine too,” Robin leans forward to kiss her cheek. “We’ll do just fine.”
Melina finally looks up at her and their eyes meet for a few moments. Melina’s hand slowly raises up to cup the back of Robin’s neck before slowly tugging the taller woman’s head down.
Robin slowly closes the distance between them, giving Melina a chance to stop or pull away. Her lips brush against Melina’s.
Neither of them yanks the other closer. They don’t pull on hair or tug on clothes or try to deepen it.
Melina pulls away first and has gone back to avoiding eye contact with Robin.
Robin’s heart is racing in her chest. “Was… was that okay?” She asked softly after a few moments.
Melina doesn’t reply verbally, just nods her head.
“Good… good…” Robin’s hand finally drops from Melina’s face to cradle her own side. “Do you think you could sit with Natasha tonight? Please? No handcuffs.”
“As you did the previous night?” Melina asked, a small frown on her face.
“You don’t have to hold her in the rocking chair as I did. It’s merely ensuring that she doesn’t run. She shouldn’t try, you should be able to get a little bit of sleep,” Robin would have done it herself. “I need rest to heal quickly, otherwise I would do this.”
Melina nods her head. “I understand. I shall sit with her tonight.” She agrees.
“No physical punishments. She’s allowed to get up and go to the bathroom, or if she really needs me, come wake me up,” Robin quickly adds before smiling at Melina. “You can do it, sweet girl.”
There’s a hint of a shy smile on Melina’s lips. “Yes, my love.”
Robin guides Melina’s head forward to kiss her forehead softly before pulling away. “Goodnight, Melina.”
Melina inclines her head. “Goodnight, Robin.”