15.
Steve stood on the street with his hands in his pockets, looking at the Stark Tower lobby in confusion. It was a glassed-in section of the ground floor, with a reception desk, elevators, and a large room to the left of the entrance, which had a view of the street. Steve remembered that when he had first come here it had looked like a waiting room, but no one used it much. For the last couple of weeks, tarps had covered the windows and there was obviously work going on inside.
Now the room was full of teenagers. Steve recognized the faces of some of them. He had seen them sitting around the tower, looking at their cell phones or textbooks. He blinked in surprise and after a moment's hesitation decided to investigate. He paused just in front of the door and looked at the sign next to it.
Stark's Leisure Centre
Open 24/7
It proclaimed in gold letters on a red background. Below it was a smaller sign informing of free WiFi and the option to borrow a computer or starpad.
Steve smiled and stepped inside, purely out of curiosity. A few eyes looked up to him but immediately returned to what they had been doing earlier. Inside there was a comfortable silence, with only a few girls talking in whispers in the corner and two boys at one of the computers, encouraging each other. Steve wasn't sure, but from what he could see on the monitor, they were playing some sort of game. Some of the kids were studying, others were working on the computer, just minding their own business.
The entire wall opposite the door was taken up by a kitchen with a sink, a coffee maker, a large bowl of fruit and a small fridge full of sodas. There were shelves above the counter and Steve had to smile gently because they reminded him too much of the shelves in Tony's office. There were about a hundred mugs in Iron Man colours on them. There were cabinets under the counter and Steve somehow guessed that they would be full of candy. The room smelled of sweets and almost every kid had a bag of candy or a chocolate bar. The rest of the room was filled with desks with computers, tablets, and last but not least, large colorful bean bags.
"Hey, you! Yes, you who just walked in!" came from a speaker near the ceiling, so suddenly that Steve and several of the kids jerked and looked around in confusion. Steve immediately recognized Tony's voice. "You're not supposed to be here, sir. This is the kids' centre. The senior internet café is across the street. Ask someone here, I'm sure they can help you cross the road."
Most of the kids burst into quiet laughter and Steve just gave an amused smile to one of the cameras, aware that Tony was watching them. The amusement in Tony's voice was dripping right out and Steve could tell how much he was enjoying this situation.
"Kids, pay attention to me!" Tony exclaimed importantly. "For those who haven't noticed, everyone's favourite Captain America just walked into the room! And I'm sure he's more than willing to tell you heroic tales of how he kicked the asses of Nazis, aliens, and other creatures that wanted to raise hell on earth. This is your one chance to ask him everything you've ever wanted to know. So go ahead, before he runs away!" He laughed.
Steve sighed but kept smiling. He took off his jacket, sat down on one of the bags and motioned for the kids to sit with him.
"If you want, I'm happy to tell you some stories. Or you can just ask me."
The younger kids stood up immediately and formed a semicircle around him, while the older ones were a little shy. Most stayed in place, but they watched and listened to him. Steve let them ask questions, which he answered patiently and as truthfully as possible. He left out the gory and overly violent details, not wanting to scare them. They asked him about the Battle of New York, and the time before the plane crash, and even two of them wanted to know what Steve was like before he became Captain America, which he was genuinely pleased about. Some wondered if he remembered anything from his time on the ice, which he denied.
Tony was happy to enter into his narrative and made everyone laugh with apt remarks. But Steve found he didn't mind at all. It was nice to just sit there and talk with them. It was a way he could pass on some of the real Captain America and break up a little of the nonsensical legend people had made of him over the seventy years. Only about ten people heard it, but even that was enough to make him feel better.
Eventually, the questions became fewer and fewer until it seemed they had exhausted them all. Steve looked up at the clock (also in the Iron Man motif). He was talking to it for almost two hours.
"Is it true what the newspaper just said about you and Mr. Stark?" One of the older girls asked. Steve looked at her; she could have been about seventeen, sitting in a mountain of textbooks, her face pale and uncertain. He smiled at her. He was pleased to find that his heart was no longer racing and he didn't feel like running away like he had the first time someone had asked him.
He has had a lot of time to think over the past few days, reading many articles on the internet about Coming out and even daring to read the article itself. It was terrible and he finished it with an inner revulsion, only to improve his mood afterwards by reading the comments. Tony was right, most people cursed the author and sided with him and Tony. There was even a hashtag (Jarvis had to explain to him what the hashtag meant) ISupportStony. Steve had to grin in amusement at the combination of their names. It sounded strange, Stony, but he liked it.
"Not really," he began slowly, his head tilted to the side in thought. He watched one spot on the wall vaguely, aware of the stares of everyone in the room and one camera. Though nervous, he was determined to tell the truth about himself for the first time in his life. He had to start somewhere, and a bunch of kids admiring him didn't seem like a bad start. "It's not true that Tony and I were together. But it is true that..." he took a deep breath, giving himself courage, "that I'm gay."
It was strange to hear it like that. At the same time, he felt something fall away from him and felt incredibly relieved. It was as if he'd been dragging a huge boulder with him all his life, and now he'd finally dropped it on the ground. He felt good, he felt light and he was honestly proud of himself.
He looked around, all eyes on him, and was relieved to find not a single judgmental look among them. The boys looked embarrassed, but not disapproving. To his right he even heard someone whisper, "See, I told you so!"
"You sound like you're saying it out loud for the first time," one of the girls laughed, and Steve nodded in agreement.
"That’s true."
"No way!" She yelped in surprise, covering her mouth with her hands. "You've never told anyone? Not even, like, your parents or a friend?"
Steve shook his head.
"But you did have a boyfried, didn't you?"
He shook his head again.
"Why not?"
He sighed softly and closed his eyes for a moment. He found that this was actually the harder part than the actual confession. The pounding on the door and the screams of the police rang in his ears again. "I grew up in a different time than you. Today, of course, you meet people who disagree with this, they may judge you. But in my time it was illegal. The police could arrest you for it and send you away," he frowned discontentedly, a chill running down his back. This topic was really uncomfortable. "I'd be risking too much if I told anyone."
"That's disgusting," snapped a boy probably the same age as the pale girl, and such concern spilled over his face that Steve was both puzzled and pleased. He agreed with him, everyone in the room agreed with him.
They talked for a few more minutes before Steve stood up and excused himself, saying he had to go. He gave out a few hugs and a few autographs and was rewarded with admiring and supportive looks. He felt good. On the one hand, yes, he had only confessed to a group of kids, but even that was a start, wasn't it?
He gave another quick glance to the camera before he left and made his way to the elevators. His stomach tightened slightly as he realized that he would now have to face Tony who fell silent right after Steve's confession and didn't speak again, which could have been both a good and bad sign. But he sincerely hoped it would be okay. Despite everything, Tony was a very open and tolerant person.
Slowly but surely, Tony's good mood vanished as his work went south over and over again. He was trying to track down the driver who had hit Pepper and the guy who had upset Bruce so much that he had let the Hulk loose. He was failing at neither and honestly, he didn't understand.
New York was full of cameras. Literally. Cameras were at every turn, in every convenient store, on every road. And Tony knew how to use them. It was no problem hacking into them and getting footage, he'd done it a thousand times. He'd tried his luck with traffic cameras first, and after a few seconds he'd found several that had caught Pepper's accident. His blood went cold in his veins as he watched, and he made a mental note to get a big fat bonus to Pepper's driver.
The accident looked bad. The other driver was driving a pickup truck, the kind of big car that wouldn’t show a dent even after hitting a wall. They were supposed to stop at a red light, but didn't, and he slammed into Pepper’s car at full speed. It spun, and if Pepper's driver - James, he reminded himself - had hesitated, they'd probably both be dead. He managed to get the car under control, avoided the oncoming vehicle and a lamppost, and stopped on the grass. The pickup didn't even slow down and drove off while James quickly dragged Pepper out of the car and called an ambulance.
Out of curiosity, Tony looked James up in the Stark Industries employee database. James Jones, JJ for short. He was a young guy, turning twenty-five next month, with blonde hair and dark eyes. And according to the records, he was a race car driver, which explained his skills. Lots of hefty bonuses, Tony assured himself.
The other driver's face was too vague to find, and he couldn't make out the license plate number - the car had been stolen that day. Tony tried to follow him with the cameras and at least get an approximate idea of where he was going, but that was also a dead end.
"Shit," he growled. He wanted to find the bastard no matter what, he couldn't just let it go but nothing was in his favour today.
"Jarvis, watch the car. If anyone beeps about it, I want to know."
"Certainly, sir."
"Okay," he sighed, rubbing his stiff neck and trying his luck with Bruce's student. Things looked promising there. Although there were no cameras in the auditorium, the hallway was full of them and all he had to do was wait. With Jarvis' help, he was able to follow him through the crowd of the other students to the outside.
"Daniel Hernandez, sir," Jarvis announced almost immediately, and several windows popped up on one of the monitors. Tony frowned at the young man's face. He was of a similar age to James, his gaze was direct and serious, and as Tony soon found out, all the information he had given the university was a dead end.
"You're not making me happy today, Jarv."
"I'm genuinely sorry, sir," Jarvis replied dispassionately. Tony ran his hands over his face, trying to think clearly. "All right, Jarvis, search everything you can. I want to know the first and last thing about him, even if it's just a stupid Facebook status."
"I'll get right on it, sir."
Tony squirmed in his chair and his gaze ended on the camera feed. He smiled contentedly, he'd only opened the center yesterday morning, but already it was full of kids. They were sitting at tables and on bean bags, doing what they had to do. Steve's comment about the approaching winter had given him the idea, obviously a good one.
"Speak of the devil..." he grinned to himself, watching the soldier who had just entered the room and was looking around curiously. Tony couldn't stop himself, he just couldn't. He moved the microphone closer to him.
"Hey you! Yes, you who just walked in!" He said, watching in amusement as Steve and a couple of the kids jerked. "You're not supposed to be in here, sir. This is a center for kids. The Internet cafe for seniors is across the street. Ask someone here, I'm sure they can help you cross the road."
He watched and listened with pleasure to the laughter pouring from all corners and Steve's crooked indulgent smile that appeared on his lips whenever Tony did something stupid. He was having fun, he could have thrown Steve to the little wolves who would surely tear him apart! With questions, of course.
"Kids, pay attention to me!" he called out, importantly. "For those who haven't noticed, everyone's favorite Captain America just walked into the room! And I'm sure he's more than willing to tell you heroic tales of how he kicked the asses of Nazis, aliens, and other creatures who wanted to raise hell on earth. This is your one chance to ask him everything you've ever wanted to know. So go ahead, before he runs away!" He laughed.
Steve's shoulders slumped in a sigh. He gave the camera one more look. He was smiling, he didn't seem annoyed. He took off his jacket and settled on one of the bags so Tony couldn't see his face anymore, but that didn't matter. He could gazed at his body undisturbed.
He was a handsome man, he really had to admit that. He was good to look at.
"If you want, I'm happy to tell you some stories. Or you can just ask me."
Tony went back to work, but listened intently to Steve's story, happily joining in, drawing more and more laughter from the kids and earning a number of smiles from Steve. Oh god, he loved that smile.
"Sir, I've finished my research on Daniel Hernandez," Jarvis spoke up and Tony gave Steve a moment of peace. He wasn't at all pleased with the data, though. Jarvis had gone through everything and found a big nothing.
"That doesn't make sense, Jarv!" He snapped at him. "There's no way he’s not leaving any clues behind. Doesn't he have credit cards? What about a driver's license? Shit, Jarv, anything!"
"Nothing at all, sir. Daniel Hernandez doesn't officially exist."
Tony growled angrily and took a sip of coffee. "Did you try to find him from the photo?"
"Yes, sir. And I couldn't find anything. The man doesn't exist as Daniel Hernandez or anyone else."
Another dead end, well done, he thought bitterly. Another fucking dead end. He felt despair surge through his body. He wanted to get to the bottom of this, needed to get to the bottom of this. But no matter what he tried, he couldn't.
He paced back and forth across the room, settling several mugs on the shelf in a futile attempt to relax. Peripherally, he was still aware of Steve's soothing voice and thought he might discuss it with him. Maybe Captain Perfect would have an idea.
"But the truth is...I'm gay."
Shattering porcelain was the last thing Tony cared about at the moment. He turned abruptly and raced back to the table. He jumped into the chair knee first and stopped all the way against the table, eyes pinned firmly on the screen. Steve looked... calm. His shoulders were tense and his neck stiff, but otherwise he was quite calm. He wasn't freaking out, wringing his fingers or rubbing his face like he always did when he was nervous.
"Holy shit," he breathed, running his hands through his hair, but a stupid grin spread across his face. Captain had come out of the closet, finally! It was stupid, but he was incredibly proud of him.
"Jarvi, keep him in the elevator for a minute!" He shouted, rushing upstairs to the bar. They must pop the champagne and celebrate! And have a damn ice cream! And maybe even sex on the couch, but they'd see about that later.
He laughed to himself as he rummaged through his supplies, then cursed again when he realized he only had whiskey and scotch. But eventually he found a bottle of champagne, forgotten and hidden, but it was there and that was what mattered! He grabbed two glasses, surprisingly didn't break them, and ran to the elevator just before the doors opened.
Steve stepped out with hands tucked in his pockets and a mixture of nervousness and anticipation on his face. As soon as he saw Tony, he smiled and looked at the champagne and glasses.
"What's the champagne for?"
"We're celebrating, Steve!" He exclaimed excitedly, raising both hands in the air. "You've finally come out of the closet and we need to celebrate!"
He let out a short chuckle, but didn't disagree. He just fixed Tony with a look of sincere gratitude, and Tony thought he was going to drown in that look. Okay, he realised, I guess he really could have a thing for Rogers. But only a little.
He gave Steve another wide smile, and hugged him. "I'm proud of you, man."
"Thanks, Tony," Steve gushed in surprise, but he returned the hug and rested his forehead on Tony's shoulder for a moment. As soon as he pulled away, Tony pressed the glasses into his hands and walked towards the couches, trying to open the champagne.
"So, are you going to make a big deal out of this? Some kind of public Captain America announcement or something?"
"Absolutely not," he dismissed with a quiet laugh, following Tony. "I'll tell the team and Fury. And if anyone asks me, I'll answer. But I won't make any public statements."
"You told a bunch of kids," Tony grinned at him. "The whole internet already knows."
Steve just shrugged at that and held up the glasses. They toasted, talked for a while, and Tony just watched contentedly at how happy and relaxed Steve looked. Gone was the stiff stance and serious Captain America look that had been on his face even when he didn't exactly have to be the Captain, and Tony could only see Steve himself. They were alike in that way, he thought. Tony hid behind his smiles and masks and Steve hid behind his Captain. They rarely showed their true selves.
Tony didn't realize what he was doing until the moment he actually did it. With a single step, he closed the distance between them and pressed a brief kiss to Steve's lips. He heard him draw air into his lungs and looked down at him with a startled look. Tony sank back on his heels and returned the look. He swallowed hard.
"Tony..."
"Don't ask!" he stopped him instantly and smiled nervously. "I don't know what I'm doing myself. But I'll figure it out, I promise. And then I'll be able to answer you! But for now... for now, don't ask."
Steve seemed perhaps even more confused than before. He just looked at Tony in silence for a long time, his eyes darting from place to place. Finally, he smiled. Tender and understanding, andTony felt his heart skip a beat.
"Okay, Tony."
"Fine! Perfect!" he said with another nervous laugh. "I'm going to go work now. And think. And then we'll talk about it sometime, okay? I know how you like to talk, so we can talk. Then. Not now. And somehow," he gestured with his hand between them, "work this out. If you agree."
"I agree."
Tony nodded and backed toward the elevator, the corners of his mouth still spread into a nervous smile. His heart was pounding wildly, and he was marginally aware that he hadn't been this nervous since maybe puberty.
He backed into the elevator and just as the doors closed, he leaned against the wall and let out a sharp gasp. Okay... Interesting. He just kissed Rogers.
And he didn't mind...
Tony must have been proud of himself, because this time the party was a real success. The food was delicious, the drinks were even better, and the chocolate fountain with the fruit bowls was the best! Pepper just purred in satisfaction as the colour of the tablecloths finally matched the colors of the napkins. He talked to a lot of people that evening, half of whom he didn't even know, but he threw perfect smiles in all directions, entertained everyone with his jokes and actually made it quite an enjoyable evening. Until he noticed Bettany.
She was standing at the entrance to the patio, talking to Pepper's assistant. Judging by their interactions, they were either very close or Bettany was just trying to seduce him and get some juicy information out of him. And then bite his head off like a praying mantis. She noticed him, smiled at him provocatively, and raised her wine glass. Tony returned the gesture and smiled, but bitterness spilled through his body. He sought out Pepper with his gaze and made his way over to her, pulling her away from the conversation.
"Pep, honey, a moment?"
She shot him a disgruntled look at first but then smiled, apologized to her companions, and headed for the chocolate fountain with Tony.
"Something wrong?"
"No, no, not at all, I just want to know who invited that witch over," he mumbled half-mouthed, motioning to Bettany with his hand, ostentatiously enough for her to notice. She gave him another provocative look.
Pepper eyed her uncertainly for a long moment, her head cocked to the side, before she slowly stated, "That's... my assistant's girlfriend, if I remember correctly. They got together fairly recently. Why do you ask?"
He shrugged at that and took a sip of wine. He had to nod in satisfaction, he wasn't the wine type, but this was delicious. "Oh, well, just curiosity. That's the journalist who wrote about me and Steve."
"That bitch," Pepper hissed softly and Tony couldn't help but laugh. "That's her? I’m surprised she's not ashamed to show up here!"
"She wasn't ashamed to get into my pants just to have something to write about," he laughed softly. "So this is just a little sacrifice. By the way, you're probably the only one who didn't ask me about the article," he realized quickly, standing up so that Pepper would only pay attention to him and not Bettany. He wiggled his eyebrows curiously. "Why's that?"
Pepper sighed, averting her gaze from him to her own wine. She swirled it in her glass and allowed herself a few more moments of silence before shrugging. "Honestly, I'm not surprised you might have something with Captain Rogers."
Tony blinked. This was perhaps the only reaction he hadn't expected. What does she mean, not surprised? Had he ever been with a guy? He hadn't! Then how was Pepper not surprised?
"Whoa, whoa, whoa," he stopped her with a hand gesture. "Slow down, Pep, slow down. Not surprised? Look, I know I'm a pretty extravagant guy, and I've tried a lot of things - like that orgy in Italy, that was an interesting experience - but as far as I know, I haven't done that yet."
Pepper stopped watching the wine and looked up at him, her face darkening slightly with displeasure, but eventually, she sighed resignedly. "You still haven't remembered."
"What?" he cocked an uncomprehending eyebrow, for a moment really not knowing what she was talking about. Then it hit him. "Jesus, Pepper. No, I still haven’t remember. I don't know what I did at the stupid event, but we're talking about the article now-"
"I found you in the bathroom kneeling in front of the waiter. Jesus Christ," she whispered, burying her face in her hands. Tony had to appreciate Pepper's determination to surprise him with everything that came out of her mouth today. She was doing great.
He watched her and just blinked in puzzlement. Slowly but surely, her words began to sink in, and as if by magic, the curtain rose, revealing most of the memories of the other night. A tall, blond, blue-eyed waiter in a white shirt and vest. The taste of cigarettes on his lips. The cold floor pressed into his knees. Something in his mouth. Oh, my God!
"Oh... Oh!" He exclaimed in surprise and several eyes turned on him. He ignored them and just watched Pepper's red face and embarrassed look. "That, uh... wow."
"Yeah," she nodded. "I took his camera, assured him he'd regret it if he said a word to anyone, and got you in a cab."
There was an awkward silence between them. Tony was no longer even aware of the mutterings around them, he just watched Pepper. So that's exactly how he fucked up! He finally knew.
"That was probably the worst thing you've ever caught me at, wasn't it?"
"No," she laughed. "Sitting drunk in a pen with llamas, with a pentagram, candles and a skull in front of you, mumbling something in Latin, that was the worst."
"Satanism is sexy, Pepper," he waggled his eyebrows significantly, earning only another laugh and a gentle punch in the arm. He laughed with her, took a sip of wine and let out a long sigh.
"Tony, listen," she said softly, patting his arm and smiling genuinely. Tony watched the tiny lines around her eyes that he loved so much about her and she hated. "I don't care if the article was true or not. I'll stand by you no matter what. But when I found you there..." she sighed and finished her wine in one go, which might have been rude, but totally sexy. He'd always liked women who could drink. "I thought you just had me as a cover so it wouldn't come out. And I didn't want that. That would kill me, Tony."
He smiled. Pepper, beloved Pepper, who had survived the worst things he'd done and yet always stood by him. He didn't deserve her at all. He reached out and stroked her cheek with his thumb, giving her the most sincere look he could.
"It wasn't like that, Pep. Really."
"Good," she nodded and smiled. "Good. I'm glad to know."
Tony skewered a piece of strawberry on his fork and dipped it into the chocolate. He watched the whole process thoughtfully, aware of Pepper's gaze. He smiled.
"Look, Pep... And if I happen to end up having something with Rogers... would you mind?"
He felt her palm on his arm, and only then did he look up to her. She was smiling. "You're comfortable with him, aren't you?"
"Yeah..." he whispered and ate the strawberry. "It's... I don't know, I can't describe it. It's different than it's ever been. Steve is different."
She grunted in agreement and nodded, her grip slightly tighter. "I've noticed it, you know? You're happier, and calmer. And you have a healthy colour," she giggled, poking him in the cheek with her finger. Tony stuck his tongue out at her.
"Tony, as long as you're happy, I don't care who you're with."
"Thanks, Pep," he sighed. He wrapped one arm around her and pressed a kiss into her hair. "You're great, you know that?"
"I know."
"So we're cool? You and me?" He asked, and it occurred to him that he'd asked that question far too often lately.
"Yes, Tony," she assured him, pushing her glass into his hand. "But now, if you'll excuse me, I'm going to talk to Miss Journalist."
He pressed his hand to his chest and watched Pepper admiringly. "Are you going to defend my honour, my brave knight?"
"You bet. No one's going to drag your or Steve's name through the mud," she said gravely and gracefully but firmly made her way to Bettany. Tony couldn't help a mischievous smile. Facing an angry Pepper was not nice at all and he was just enjoying being able to watch from the front row.