suspension
Yelena stays kneeling, her bloodied hands resting on her knees as she stares at the pavement. Coulson had stepped off to the side to speak into his phone and Yelena was too tired to read his lips and pay attention.
Skye still hadn’t moved from near the door, shuffling in place and clearly unsure of what she should do.
Coulson finally turns to address Yelena. “Get up and in the car.”
Yelena glances at the Widow and Coulson sighs.
“Agents are en route to deal with this. Come on, up and into the car,” He orders once again and Yelena rises to her feet.
“She’s dangerous.” Yelena mumbles as she passes Coulson.
Coulson doesn’t speak another word to her the whole ride back. When they step off the jet, Coulson sets a hand onto Yelena’s shoulder to march her into the Helicarrier. His hand is far too close to her neck for comfort but Yelena bears it because she already pissed him off.
As soon as the door to the Director’s office slides open, Yelena is greeted with shouting.
Yelena knows Skye doesn’t like shouting but also doesn’t know if she’d accept her comfort.
Bobbi and Natalia are there along with Maria and Fury. The shouting ceases when the door slides open and heads turn to look at them.
Natalia moves toward Yelena. “Get your hands off of her!” She snaps at Coulson, yanking Yelena away from his grip and into hers.
Natalia’s eyes narrow in on Yelena’s bloodied knuckles and she gripped her wrists to pull them up and inspect them. “What happened?” She demanded.
Yelena can feel all eyes on her and she swallows hard. “She needed to die.” She replies quietly, wincing when Natalia tightened the grip on her wrists.
“What did you do?” Natalia’s voice softens when she notices the wince.
To Yelena’s frustration, tears well up in her eyes as memories come forth that she had tried to bury. She inhales sharply and swallows down a sob but she doesn’t do a very good job of hiding it because Natalia pulls her into her arms and allows Yelena to bury her face into her shoulder.
Yelena feels pathetic and small for needing her big sister’s comfort.
“Can we go to the bathroom?” Natalia asked Maria, her hand cupping the back of Yelena’s neck. “Please?”
Yelena thinks Maria must have nodded because Natalia is then guiding her toward the door and down the hallway to the nearest bathroom.
Natalia locks the door behind them and then guides Yelena over to the sinks, turning the warm water on and gripping Yelena’s hands to push them under the water.
Natalia’s front is pressed against her back and Yelena leans back into the warmth and tries not to focus on the red water running down the drain. Natalia’s hands are gentle as she washes the blood off of Yelena’s knuckles.
Yelena peers up into the mirror and stares at herself. Thoughts keep trying to push to the front of her mind and she tries to shove them back into the box she put dark memories in. She barely registers the tear rolling down her cheek until Natalia’s nose nudged against it in concern as she finishes washing Yelena’s hands.
Yelena’s head feels fuzzy like when they’ve forced too many pills into her porridge in the morning. She keeps getting lost staring at her reflection in the mirror.
Natalia keeps putting pressure on her hands and wrists and it brings Yelena back to consciousness before she’s pulled under again a few moments later. She doesn’t know when they shift to sit on the floor but she’s suddenly curled up against Natalia.
She’s jolted out of memories once again when there’s a knock on the bathroom door. “Natalia?” Maria calls out. “Everything okay?”
“Can I let Maria inside?” Natalia questioned Yelena, smoothing her hair back.
“Don’t let her hit me…” Yelena breathes out, still not quite present.
“Never,” Natalia cups her face, pressing their foreheads together.
Yelena lets out a small shaky nod and Natalia lets her go long enough to unlock the door.
Maria enters the bathroom, closing the door and locking it again behind her. “What’s going on?” She glances between the two sisters.
Yelena misses the reply Natalia gives Maria but kneels in front of her a few moments later.
“Eyes on me, Yelena,” Maria orders but her voice is soft. Yelena’s eyes flicker up to peer at Maria’s left ear, the closest she could get to eye contact in her state. “What am I not?”
Yelena thinks she knows the answer to this but it won’t come to her mind at the moment.
“I am not…” Maria paused and Yelena takes a moment before the answer pops into her mind.
“The Red Room.” She replies obediently.
“I am not the Red Room,” Maria nods her head. “Whatever punishment you think I am going to give you is probably wrong.” Maria looks at Natalia. “What punishment would you have received in the Red Room?”
Natalia holds Yelena just a little closer as she thinks. “We’d get beat and then made to dance until we cannot anymore.”
“We need to discuss what happened and only then can we think of an appropriate punishment. One thing I can guarantee is that you will not be hit and you will not be forced to physical exertion,” Maria tells them in a serious tone. She glances between the sisters. “You can take a few minutes to collect yourselves but the director is waiting.”
Maria doesn’t leave but she doesn’t speak anymore either. Yelena tries to focus and stay in the present, focusing on Natalia’s hands tapping onto her side.
She finally takes one more deep breath before nodding her head at Maria. “I’m ready.” She whispers in English.
Maria offers her a hand up to her feet and doesn’t seem offended when she doesn’t take it. Yelena pulls herself together and she pulls away from Natalia.
She was a big girl. She could handle a few moments away from her sister even if she wanted nothing more than to curl into Natalia and feel her surround her.
They reenter Fury’s office. Bobbi, Skye, and Coulson have all left, leaving only the Director waiting for them.
Fury nods at the two empty seats in front of him. “Sit.” He orders.
Yelena notices immediately when Maria doesn’t move to stand at his right side as usual and instead stands behind the two chairs where Yelena and Natalia sat.
Fury glances at Natalia. “You will not speak or interrupt because you were not there.” He tells her firmly. “I can make you leave the room if I have to. You being here is a privilege. Do you understand that?”
Natalia gives a curt nod and Fury’s gaze settles onto Yelena.
“Rookie Agent Belova,” He addressed her, and Yelena had been so used to hearing him just call her Rookie or even Yelena when it was just him and Goose in the room with her. “Walk me through what happened today starting from when you left Agent Coulson’s side.”
Yelena drags a deep breath into her lungs. “I was looking in the clearance rack for things in Skye’s size…” She starts. “I was scanning the entrance and keeping count of the people who entered and left. A woman passed by and… I recognized her.”
“So you followed her,” Fury infers and Yelena nods her head.
“It wasn’t until I got a look at her face that I knew who she was and I must have stared for a little too long because she turned and she saw me,” Yelena admits quietly, shame in her gut. She had been so foolish and caught up in memories when she saw the woman that she stared too long. “She ran so I ran after her.”
“Who is she?” Fury interrupts before she can keep speaking.
“I…” Yelena clenches her jaw before ducking her head down. “I don’t know her name.”
Fury lets out a grunt. “Yet you deemed her enough of a threat to try and kill.”
“Yes.” Yelena agrees. “She’s from the Red Room. She’s a Widow.”
Fury leans back in his chair, tapping his fingers together in thought. “So you followed her outside. What then?”
“We fought. I tried to extract information but she wouldn’t give me anything and… I did what I had to,” Yelena ignores the sharp inhale that came behind her from Maria. “I don’t regret what I did and I’d do it again.”
She peers up at Fury to see that he has an eyebrow raised. “Why did you decide to kill rather than incapacitate?” It’s the same question he asked her when she killed six men when the Helicarrier was invaded.
“She’s not dead, is she?” Yelena questioned. “Did I succeed?”
“You nearly crushed her windpipe,” Fury said. “And broke her nose. Medics had to put a tube down her throat to let her breathe.”
“But she’s alive?” Yelena checks and Fury nods. “Oh…”
“I will not ask again. Why did you feel the need to try and kill?” Fury asked her and Yelena hesitates, glancing at Natalia before answering.
“She would return to the Red Room and tell them that I’m alive and where I am. If she saw who I was with, a government agent and a child genius, then she’d tell them. They’d know,” Yelena shakes her head. “I couldn’t let her go back.”
Fury nods his head. “Do you know how many rules you’ve broken?”
It’s not a rhetorical question. “Three.”
“Name them,” Fury orders, leaning forward in his seat.
“I will not harm others unless my life is in danger, I will not possess a weapon on me until I am cleared to do so by my handler, I will not run away or leave my handlers side while off of base until I am granted the permission to do so.” Yelena lists obediently before glancing up at him.
“What are the ramifications for three infractions?” He asked and Yelena hesitates because she wasn’t an actual agent. “Rookie Agent Belova?”
“Two-week suspension and a psychological evaluation,” Yelena replies. “Along with menial work.”
“If you were one of my agents then I’d fire you and ship you off back home,” Fury said and Natalia tenses up next to Yelena. “We have absolutely no proof that the woman you attacked is part of the Red Room. You did so in a public place and it can be connected back to us.”
Yelena swallows hard and resists the urge to grip her sister’s hand. She doesn’t want to be separated from her. “I’m not sorry.” She repeats.
Fury’s lips pressed in a thin line. “I can tell.” He replies before shaking his head and then letting out a long sigh. “Rookie Agent Belova, until further notice you are on immediate suspension--”
Yelena’s breath hitched as she tenses up and waits for the news.
“You will be confined to your room. You will not leave to train or partake with the other rookies. Your meals will be delivered to you,” Fury continues and Yelena digs her fingers into her thighs. “I hope you understand that until your claims are proven to be true we have to treat this as you attacking an innocent civilian.”
Yelena clenches her jaw and shoves away the bitter nausea churning in her gut. Of course, they didn’t believe her.
“You will also be seeing your therapist three times a week instead of once,” Fury tacks on and Yelena swallows hard. “Do not make this harder than it has to be, am I understood?”
Yelena can’t seem to get the reply out of her mouth. She gives a small nod.
“Verbal acknowledgment, Rookie Agent Belova,” Fury orders and Yelena opens her mouth to try and reply.
She means to say ‘yes sir’ or something along those lines. Two little words forced out of her mouth and she would be dismissed.
All that comes out is a choked sob.