Apricity

Regulus had been so scared that day after practice. After his summer with Potter, the universe apparently felt as though he needed a bit of a challenge. 

He had felt safer than he did his entire childhood, in just two weeks. Potter had relit a part of him. It had been so easy for him to get Regulus to open up. He had no idea how, or why even, but it had felt really good.

This is why he had had an immediate full blown panic attack, the second he found out what people were saying about him. Of course the whole thing was true, but he just was not ready to tell it to the world yet.

Last summer Regulus had gotten slightly drunk off a bottle of his mothers wine, with another boy. He hadn't even known his name, but he had kissed him. 

Waking up afterwards he had prayed for so long that nobody would ever find out, at least not until he told them. But now it had happened, and it felt like his entire world was falling apart. 

The fact that Potter had probably heard the story from some random person made it even worse. He had just started to think that maybe Potter wasn't a total wanker, and that he actually enjoyed his company.

His first thought had been, that the second Potter heard, we would never want to be alone with him again. Which meant no more night tea, which had been the best conversations he had had in years. 

Then Potter had walked into the locker room, looking like he had seen a dead body.

“Who did this to you?” had been the first words out of his mouth, and Regulus had gone so weak.

He hadn't said “Merlin, glad someone did something. Bloody pervert” Regulus couldn't actually imagine those words ever coming out of Potter's mouth, but he had thought them nonetheless.

He had been so gentle with him. Looked at him in a way that made Regulus want to cry.

He had then taken them to the infirmary, and insisted that madam Pomfrey saw to him straight away. 

He had stayed in that stupid chair by his bedside, the entire time as she fixed him up. Regulus had been particularly aware of the glances madam Pomfrey made between them, followed by a tiny smile.

Potter had walked him the whole way to the Slytherin common room this time. Then he had offered to escort him to and from the quidditch pitch whenever he had practice, or any other time if he ever felt the need for it.

To which Regulus had replied “That is absolutely ridiculous. There is no need for you to that”

—--------------

And sure enough, not even two days later, there he was. Regulus had just walked out of the castle, as he had heard someone behind him.

With a big stupid smile on his face, Potter had caught up to him “I told you, you don't have to escort me” Regulus sighed “And i'm not. I simply thought it would be fun to get some of my homework done while watching you practise. There's nothing wrong with that, is there?” Potter had lifted up a book, to prove his point.

“I suppose not”

He sat through their entire practice “reading”

He barely looked down at his book. He was just watching them play. And for some extremely odd reason, Regulus got very nervous knowing that Potter's eyes were on him.

“Potter-”

“No, don't start. It is simply a funny cuóincidence that I just happen to have finished my reading the exact same time that you've finished practice. Oh and now i get to walk back with you, isn't that lovely?” he had that big smile on his face again, as he was trailing behind Regulus.

“No. I find it quite annoying actually” Regulus said, speeding up his walk just slightly “Oh but do you really?” he caught to him with ease. Regulus just shook his head with a sigh.

“Oh and i didnt tell Sirius in case you were wondering” 

Regulus stopped, making Potter stop as well of course “You didn't?” he asked, confused “No. I figured you probably didn't want him to know. And with this situation I figured it would be best not to draw any unwanted attention to it. You know how Sirius gets” Potter explained, and Regulus was just in disbelief. 

“Well then. Thank you” Regulus then started walking again. “Did you want me to tell him?” he asked.

“No. i just- he's your best friend. You two are annoying inseparable. I just figured you had told him about something like this” Regulus explained.

“Well I probably should have, but I didn't. He is my best friend, but you are- you are -”

“Im what Potter?” they had finally made it back inside the castle. “It doesn't matter. My only priority was to make sure that you were okay….god forbid something else happens. But if it does, then with your permission then i'll tell him” 

Regulus felt dizzy. Potters only priority was making sure that he was okay? 

“Well I appreciate the concern. Now if you will excuse me i promised to have lunch with Barty” Regulus quickly walked past him into the great hall, praying that Potter hadn't noticed how flustered a single sentence had made him. 

—--------------

“Where did you come from just now?” Remus asked, making James stop in his tracks. He had hoped to be able to make it to his room without any questions.

“The quidditch pitch” technically he didn't lie. 

“You don't have practice today. And with a book? Jesus christ James, sit down and don't lie to me” Remus sat up, after having laid down with a book. James let out a deep sigh, but joined him by the fire anyway.

“Okay you have to promise that you won't tell Sirius” James said seriously, sitting across from Remus “Well last year he didn't seem to have a problem keeping things from me, so sure i wont tell him” Remus said, being terrible at hiding his sarcasm.

“I thought you forgive him for that?” James asked “Well this isn't about me is it? Just tell me what it is” Remus sighed.

“Fine. The other day I overheard some Hufflepuffs talking badly about Regulus. And then I found him in the locker rooms, after they had just beaten him up. Ever since he moved in I have just been feeling kinda protective of him i guess, so i wanted to make sure he made it to and from practice” James explained, patiently waiting any sort of reaction from Remus.

“Blood hell. Well I guess I can understand that. But what could possibly be so bad that they just randomly beat him up” Remus asked.

“Well that is kinda the whole reason why i didnt wanna tell Sirius right away. Apparently he likes men, or didn't actually get that confirmed. But they were calling him all sorts of words, and that is also why they beat him up” James told Remus, feeling his stomach turn at the thought.

“Oh. oh. Yeah I can see why you didn't tell Sirius. But just be careful okay James? I know that Regulus lives with you now, but you never know what might happen with the other Slytherins” Remus said.

“I know, and I am being careful. I just really don't want anything bad to happen to him. Ever”

—---------

Regulus hadn't been to so many parties while at Hogwarts. In fact he wasn't even sure if any of them counted as parties.

Now here he was, slightly drunk, having shared half a bottle of firewhiskey with Evan. 

Some 7th years had somehow gotten them into the room of requirement, and it had turned into a sort of ballroom with little sitting areas. The music was way too loud for Regulus, he had always hated these sort of gatherings, but Evan had convinced him.

Actually whatever Evan had said, had not contributed to him coming at all. The only reason he had wanted to come was because Potter was there. He hated himself for that fact.

He felt pathetic. Had he really been convinced to come to a stupid party, simply because a guy had been nice to him a couple times?

“Are you guys having fun?” Potter had walked up to them, with that big smile of his, now looking incredibly drunk “We definitely are. Aren't we Reg?” Evan elbowed him “Hm? Sure of course we are” Regulus said looking up at him, feeling like he was unable to stop.

Evan made them drinks, which had definitely not been a good idea. The room was spinning, and Regulus was fumbling around for a place to sit down for a second.

He ended up in a big soft chair, which was absolutely perfect at that moment. He leaned his head back, and looked around to locate in which end of the room he had ended up “You alright?” 

Beside him sat the Lupin boy. Or more accurately, Sirius' boyfriend. “I'm alright thanks, just needed to sit down that's all” Regulus slurred defensively “Right” Lupin chuckled.

Regulus sat in the chair, and continued to just look around the room, at the people dancing, but then he stopped.

Oh.

The thing he was looking at made him feel the immediate need to vomit.

Potter was dancing with that Evans girl, oh and also they were very much snogging. His hand was in her stupid long red hair, and suddenly Regulus couldn't breathe.

“Excuse me for a second” he quickly told Lupin, who had been kind enough to get him a glass of water.

He rushed towards the nearest entrance. Air. He needed air. Luckily the room had given them a couple balconies as well. He closed the door behind him, leaning against the railing trying to slow his breathing.

Why was he so dumb? Of course Potter had been nice to him. He was the sweetest person in their entire school. He was his best friend's little brother, of course he had helped him, he had probably felt forced to actually.

How could he have forgotten that very important fact? Also Potter was straight! For Merlin's sake nothing had ever made it seem like he wasn't. He was as straight as a board, and dating the prettiest girl in his year. Of course he was. 

“Reg?” he turned around and Barty was there “hey hey hey, you okay? What happened?” he asked in the sweetest way possible.

For some reason Regulus couldn't form words. He simply shook his head and Barty somehow understood. He pulled him into a tight hug, holding the back of his head.

“I know this place is super packed, remember i said it would be completely okay if you didn't wanna come” he rubbed his back “I know… just didnt wanna miss out” Regulus sniffled.

They pulled back and Barty immediately softened “Oh darling…” he smiled worriedly and wiped away a couple tears that had escaped Regulus' eyes. 

“How about we get out of here? Steal a couple puddings from the kitchen and go back to the common room?” as he said that Regulus felt relief wash over him “That sounds wonderful actually”

Barty took his hand, holding him close as they made their way through the dancing people, finally leaving the party.

—---------------

James had gotten to the point of being drunk, where it really wasn't fun anymore. He dumped down in a chair next to Remus.

“Water?” Remus handed him a cup “Oh mooney my love, you are heaven sent” James quickly took the cup, chugging the whole thing.

“Oh I am aware. Did you have fun?” he asked. James thought about it for a second. Did he have fun? “Sure. but not so much that i feel like the hangover tomorrow is gonna be worth it” he chuckled leaning back in the chair. 

He looked around the room, and Remus was saying something to him, but his voice was completely drowned out. James watched Barty make his way to the door, with none other that Regulus holding tightly onto his hand.

He felt a sort of ache in his chest, and Merlin he kinda felt the need to throw up.

“Prongs?” Remus waved a hand in front of his face “Huh?”

James eyes didn't leave Regulus, until he was out of the room.