Flash is Thinking Everyone is Dumb
“‘Sup, Penis Parker!” Flash shouts at Peter from down the hall. Why he had to yell Peter didn’t know, because it was the end of the day and the hallways were near empty. Peter was waiting until everyone dispersed so he could grab his Spidey gear, pretending he was looking for something in his locker in the meantime. He was in no hurry today — it had already been a long week.
Peter turned to face Flash with a tight smile. “Hey, Flash. Need anything?” he asked, hoping that engaging with him would make Flash leave. Peter never usually responded to Flash yet Flash would needle him anyway. As it turned out, responding to Flash didn’t discourage him either.
Flash leaned on a locker near Peter, crossing his arms and smirking. “Sure, Penis Parker. What are you offering?” He winked. (Again, Peter’s mind supplied).
“Ha ha, real mature.” Peter paused, remembering something he mulled over while patrolling last week. “Actually, I do have a question for you. You seem to, like, talk about my penis a lot, and you call me things like dickwad.” He held his hands out, making a vaguely confused gesture at Flash. “Is this some sort of, y’know, weird fixation or something?” He tried adopting an innocent expression but knew on his face was his own slight smirk and narrowed eyes, questioning, teasing.
He watched as Flash’s expression shuttered, and Peter’s look settled into confusion as his arms fell to his sides. He saw Flash’s chest rise and fall a bit more rapidly, and stared as the boy pushed himself off the lockers and began to walk away. He stopped halfway down the hall and seemed to turn minutely to face Peter again. He heard Flash suck a breath as if he was going to say something else before he simply glared at nothing and continued down the hall.
“Oookay,” was all Peter said before grabbing his Spider-Man suit and heading in the opposite direction.
***
Peter felt his most free and least troubled swinging through the city of New York. He was still getting used to his powers, having gotten them only a few months before. When there was a relatively quiet day crime-wise, he liked to head to an abandoned building to test his strength, sneak back onto campus and test new web-fluid mixtures, or relax and swing past the tall skyscrapers.
So why was he feeling so bothered today? Everything was good. Everything was good, right? There was a light drizzle and the air was cool, which usually meant fewer people were out committing crimes. Peter found that was once again the case today, which meant that he could enjoy himself more than usual, as he actually liked swinging aimlessly through the city in this weather; it was refreshing. Yeah, everything was good. Peter, done with swinging for the time being after ending a minor robbery, landed on a roof, where he balanced on its ledge, walking back and forth. Then, he heard a familiar voice.
“Dude, come on, that is so wrong,” Flash muttered.
Peter perched on the corner of the rooftop, scanning the sidewalks until he saw the boy. Flash was walking, head down, glaring at the phone in his hands that he was rapidly typing on.
“No, no, no. Why is everyone so dumb?” Flash grumbled.
Flash was passing by the building Peter was on, so he crept down the side of the wall, peering at Flash’s phone. Sure, this was an invasion of privacy, but Flash had been bullying Peter for years so it was only fair. Or something. The screen was a bit tough to see from how far Peter still was and because of the small text on Flash’s phone, but Peter could make out the Twitter app layout, a cut-off picture of Spider-Man, and “menace.” And also a bit of Flash’s current tweet, where he seemed to be defending Spider-Man.
“No way,” Peter breathed out in a slight laugh.
Flash stopped in his tracks and looked around. Horizontally, thankfully, while Peter scurried back up to the rooftop. At the top, he stopped, watching Flash for a moment. He considered, for some reason, going to say hello. As Peter, not Spider-Man, of course. Or the other way around? He cocked his head, but wasn’t left much time to think about it when he heard a cry for help a few streets over.
Peter hmmed, turned, and shot off a web, flinging himself towards the trouble.
He didn’t see Flash whip around, staring open-mouthed as Spider-Man(!) flew through the sky, nearly above his head. He had to tweet about this.