Cats Cats And More Cats
Tuesday, 8:06 am
Malachite: Soooo does anyone wanna see pictures of my cats?
Sleep Deprived: Yes
Malachite: Zero hesitation, I like it!
Malachite Sent An Image
[It’s a small cream-coloured cat with light brown spots near her cheeks that kinda resemble freckles, she’s staring up at the camera with her wide innocent looking brown eyes]
Malachite: This is Muffin, she is an absolute sweetheart who could do no wrong but is also a bit of a dumbass who I have had to save from flushing herself down the toilet on at least three separate occasions
Sexy Lady: Precious little baby!
Meme Lord: I would unironically die for this cat
Dad Bod: Agreed
Malachite Sent An Image
[It’s a dark brown coloured cat with yellow coloured fur on the top of his head that resembles a circlet, he’s sitting up on a windowsill and is staring the camera down with his reddish-looking eyes]
Malachite: This is Crown, he’s very serious and intelligent but also a secret softie however, I fear if I leave him unsupervised for too long he will overthrow the government and I don’t think anyone could stop him
Bounce: I would totally support his takeover
Birb: I second that
Scales: I feel that as heroes you should not be supporting the anarchist tendencies of a cat
Miriko: Look at that face and tell me he wouldn’t do an amazing job running this country!
Scales: …
Scales: Fair enough
Malachite Sent An Image
[It’s Crown and Muffin curled up on a cat bed together, Crown is trying to look serious while Muffin nuzzles his face happily]
Malachite: These are my babies and if anything were to happen to them no one in Japan would be safe from my wrath
Sleep Deprived: Spoken like a true cat parent
Malachite: 😁
Sleep Deprived: Now would you like to see my cats?
Malachite: Absolutely I would
Sleep Deprived Sent An Image
[It’s a pure white cat who is preening for the camera as she bats her big blue eyes]
Sleep Deprived: This is Princess who is a precious innocent little angel and is super loving and affectionate to everyone and who would do no wrong, except for when it comes to her brother
Sleep Deprived Sent An Image
[It’s Princess sitting on top of a pure black cat who is glaring up at the camera with his angry blue eyes]
Sleep Deprived: This is Rascal who is a mischievous but affectionate little shit and loves to cause nothing but problems and who would definitely sell Hizashi out for half a can of tuna if given the chance
Malachite: Damn, half a can?
SCREECH: I swear that cat’s plotting against me!
SCREECH: I came home the other day and he was hovering over the phone but as soon as he saw me he swatted it away and acted as if nothing had happened!
Birb: Dude what did you do to him?
SCREECH: I’ve done nothing wrong!
Sleep Deprived: He gave him the wrong type of treats
Malachite: You heathen
SCREECH: It was one time!
SCREECH: Three years ago!
Malachite: A slight of that magnitude can never be forgiven
SCREECH: ACGHKLIBIDGYAEJNFHUDIB
Sleep Deprived: Anyways
SCREECH: Don’t you “anyways” me mister!
Sleep Deprived: ANYWAYS
Sanic: Ha!
Sleep Deprived Sent An Image
[It’s an old orange cat with brown stripes along her back who has Princess and Rascal cuddled up next to her as she stares the camera down sternly with her dark green eyes]
Sleep Deprived: This is Spite she’s Princess and Rascal’s surrogate mother and she’s like a hundred years old, she has survived at least three fatal accidents and has come out of them only more stubborn. She will outlive everyone in this chat
Malachite: Awe she’s such a good momma! 🥰
Malachite: I fully support her immortality!
Sleep Deprived: As do I
Twilight: Dear God there’s two of them now
Malachite: 😁
Tuesday, 9:27 am
Get Roasted: Does anyone wanna see my cat?
Malachite: Hell yeah!
Birb: I did not take you for a cat person
Get Roasted: I’m not really but Touya brought her home one day and we all kinda grew too attached to get rid of her
Sleep Deprived: You don’t choose the cat life the cat life chooses you
Malachite: Very true
Malachite: Now show us the baby!
Get Roasted Sent An Image
[It’s a light grey cat curled up on the head of someone with white and red hair while staring the camera down with sleepy golden eyes]
Get Roasted: This is Cinder she practically runs our household, everything she could ever want is given to her and in return she has made it her personal mission to get rid of any pests that enter the house
Sexy lady: Oh that's so sweet that she gets rid of the rats and spiders
Get Roasted: And thieves
SCREECH: What?
Get Roasted: About a month ago someone tried breaking into our house while I was away and I’m pretty sure the damage she inflicted upon him was far worse than anything that I could have done
Malachite: Now that’s a girl boss
Get Roasted: All four of my children have claimed that if anything were to happen to her they would immediately go villain and burn the world to the ground
Malachite: As they should
One Shot: Don’t only two of your children have quirks that include fire?
Get Roasted: Doesn’t matter
One Shot: Fair enough
Kiss It Better: And how do you and your wife feel about that?
Get Roasted: Oh we would 100% back them up
SPACE: Well that’s concerning
Malachite: No but same
Malachite: If anything were to happen to my babies no would on earth could stop me from enacting my revenge
Sleep Deprived: Same
Birb: Honestly if I was allowed to have a cat I’d probably be the same way
Twilight: Cat people are fucking terrifying
DIggy Diggy: Agreed
Malachite: 😝