Enough.
A six letter word,
A word that had never described her,
She was always TOO much,
Or NOT enough,
NEVER enough on its own.
That would be too easy.
And she never made anything easy,
At least that’s what they all told her.
Sure everyone looked at her,
She knew she looked good,
But they looked at her,
As if she was a prized possession,
An object to behold.
But no one ever understood the real her,
The one who wanted to seep out,
From behind the red coated lips,
All the unsaid words,
The un-shown feelings,
The heartbreak that laid beneath the tough exterior.
She was a person.
They had to know that right?
She was a person.
A fucking good one too if they gave her a chance,
But no one ever wanted to know the real her,
They wanted the painted face,
The red lips,
The red curled hair,
The plastered smile,
And the good lay,
No one ever begged her to stay.
Until Carson.
And that’s what scared her.
Is that once someone actually saw what was beneath,
The countless layers,
That they wouldn’t like what they saw,
And if they did she wouldn’t believe them,
Because no one had ever given her reason to.
Until now.
Her heart tore apart,
While simultaneously trying to fuse together,
To give everything she had to offer,
Or didn’t,
To Carson.
But Carson wasn’t hers,
She was like the others right?
Married?
No she wasn’t.
She said she wasn’t like the others,
Come on you know she’s not,
She said she wasn’t,
But that’s what they all say,
Oh god make up your mind you red lipped freak,
You let her in or you don’t.
What’s the worst that could happen,
What’s the worst that could,
What’s the worst that,
What’s the worst,
What’s the,
What’s……?