Adventure Guys

*Later that night, Nimue and Gruagach arrive at Pendle Hill as storm clouds begin to fill the sky.*
Nimue: It has been a long time, old friend.

*Daimio pilots a helicopter with Hellboy, Alice, Luffy and Morbius riding as passengers. Alice and Morbius read about this history about Pendle Hill.*
Alice: This is sick. Do you know what they did to the witches at Pendle Hill? They cut off their tongues, fed them to maggots and buried them alive right there on the spot.
Luffy: I thought you just had to throw a bucket of water on a witch to kill it?
Morbius: Just because it worked in The Wizard Of Oz doesn’t mean it will work in real life.
Hellboy: Don't believe everything you read on the Internet.
*Hellboy moves to a different seat.*
Alice: What did we say?
Luffy: Was it the witch thing?
Daimio: Ridding the world of evil is a dirty business.
Alice: What's with you and monsters, anyway? One of them touch you funny as a kid? I've been seeing freaky shit my whole life, and if it's taught me anything, it's that hate hides behind the most righteous faces.
Daimio: Are you seriously gonna lecture me about faces? Maybe you think I got these scars from shaving.
Alice: What happened? I'm not gonna stop asking. You might as well tell me.
Luffy: Yeah, tell us.
Daimio: My unit was on a training exercise in Belize. One of the local tribal elders came to us asking for help. Their village was under attack by a man-eater. It would come at night, carry off its prey. Mostly men, but sometimes it was women and children, too. Savage. Smart. Totally without remorse. All the while that we were hunting it, in reality, it was hunting us. I was the only survivor.
Alice: I'm so sorry.
Morbius: Can’t imagine what it must’ve been like to lose your team like that.
*The Helicopter’s radar goes off, showing that they were close.*
Daimio: We're coming up on target.
*As they get closer to Pendle Hill, the weather becomes rougher and harder for the helicopter to fly through.*
Luffy: This is really bumpy!
Daimio: There's no way we can land on that hill. I'll get us up as close as I can.
*Daimio lands the helicopter on the edge of a nearby forest.*

Gruagach: Here you go, Queen. You'll be back to feeling your amazing old self in no time.
*He hands Nimue a knife.*
Nimue: My life blood sustains you…
*She cuts the tree and it bleeds blood.*
Nimue: But now I must reclaim what is mine. The others will be here soon.
Gruagach: What about Hellboy?
Nimue: If he comes, I have a little surprise in store.

*Hellboy and the others run through the forest to get to the top of Pendle Hill.*
Hellboy: Come on, it's almost midnight! Time's running out.
Alice: Wait! Wait! Just wait!
*Alice falls on the ground in exhaustion, making the others stop.*
Morbius: What are you doing Ms. Cleo?
Alice: I'm not a demon, soldier, a pirate or a vampire. I'm fucking knackered. Just give us a sec.
Hellboy: All right. Let me give you-
*He attempts to pull her up, but a rotting hand rises out of the ground and grabs him.*
Luffy: A hand!
*Hellboy pulls a zombie out of the ground and throws it. Daimio then proceeds to shoot it.*
Morbius: Now there’s zombies?!
Hellboy: Won't anything in this country stay buried!
*More zombies begin to rise out of the ground.*
Luffy: Go eat someone else’s brains!
*Daimio begins to convalesce.*
Daimio: Not now!
*He quickly pulls out a syringe and injects himself with the liquid inside. A zombie attempts to attack them but Hellboy shoots it with his gun. But another climbs on him and tries to kill him. Morbius throws one over his shoulder and curbstomps its head.*
Morbius: And stay dead!
Luffy: Gum gum pistol!
*Luffy punches a zombie in the face, destroying its head. Daimio shoots more zombies while Alice fights some off with a tree branch.*

*After cutting her hand and it not bleeding, Nimue chants a spell and her blood begins to re enter her body through the cut.*

Daimio: Hellboy! It's almost midnight. Go find the Blood Queen. We can handle this. She'll spread her plague if you don't stop her! There's no time! Go!
Hellboy: Alice, I'm not leaving you. Go! Stop Nimue!
Luffy: We’ll take care of the zombies! Go stop the blood witch lady!
*Hellboy runs off to confront Nimue while the others stay back to deal with the zombies.*
Daimio: I'm out. Stay behind me!
Alice: Where the fuck else am I gonna go?
Morbius: They just keep coming!
*They proceed to fight more zombies. Hellboy kicks a zombie’s head off as it starts to rise out of the ground.*
Hellboy: Goal!

*Nimue manages to reclaim all of her blood, causing all the cuts in her body to heal.*
Nimue: At last… I am reborn.
Gruagach: Yeah, you're looking good, Your Majesty. Hehehehe. She's the queen of the castle. They're here, my Queen.
*They look down on the hill and see hundreds of mythical creatures such as trolls, fairies and goblins coming to see the return of the Blood Queen.*
Gruagach: They've come from out of the darkness to celebrate your return.
Nimue: No more bowing and scraping, my beloveds. That is not what I want. I want an army, long hidden from the eyes of man. I want the forgotten people out of the dark! Those who have lived in dust, who have gnawed on dry bones while dreaming of blood! That is what I want. Give me an army like that and we will make the daytime world weep!
*All of the creatures cheer for. Nimue hears a twig snap behind her.*
Nimue: Well, don't just cower there like mice. Step forth.
*Ganeida and 2 other witches appear from some bushes. With her holding Nimue’s crown made of twigs and sticks.*
Nimue: Ah. Dear sisters. How kind of you to grace me with your presence after hiding all these years.
Ganeida: Please, Nimue, for me and my sisters, have mercy.
Nimue: Ganeida, did you show me mercy?
*She then uses her magic to twist the bodies of the other 2 witches, slowly killing them.*
Nimue: When Arthur cut me to pieces and buried me alive, where was your mercy then?
Ganeida: Don't, I beg you!
Nimue: Look at you. Groveling like an animal.
*Nimue takes her crown.*
Nimue: Don't worry, Ganeida, I won't kill you. But you must do something for me first to prove your newfound loyalty. Take Hellboy to the one who can show him his destiny.
*Suddenly, Nimue is shot in the eye by Hellboy.*
Hellboy: Oh, sorry! Did I interrupt?
Gruagach: Hellboy, you bastard!
*All of the creatures get scared and flee.*
Hellboy: I hope I'm not late to the party!
*After Nimue’s face regenerates, she makes Hellboy drop his gun and tosses him aside.*
Nimue: You've arrived just in time.

*Some more zombies surround them.*
Alice: There's too many.
Morbius: Just fucking die!
*Morbius tears a zombie’s head off.*
Luffy: Stupid zombies!
*A zombie tries to attack him, but Luffy kicks its head off. Daimio shoots more but they start to gang up on him.*
Alice: Get off him!
*She pulls one off him and punches it. Somehow forcing its spirit out of its body.*
Daimio: Behind you!
*Another zombie tries to attack her but she does the same thing to it. A couple more attack Daimio but she punches and kills it. Daimio then proceeds to shoot the other one in the head.*
Daimio: Where'd you learn how to do that?
Alice: I don't know. Ever since the fairies took me,I've been able to do some weird shit. Stay behind me.
Daimio: Where else am I gonna go? Get us out of here!
Luffy: Yeah! Keep doing whatever it is you’re doing!

Gruagach: Know when to wait. Not so fucking funny now, eh?
*Nimue puts her crown on.*
Gruagach: My Queen, restore me now! Let me finish him!
Nimue: Not just yet.
Gruagach: But you swore-
*She slaps him.*
Gruagach: Ow!
Nimue: Mind your tongue, pig. Move it. Get in.
*Nimue opens a portal that Gruagach goes through.*
Hellboy: Hey. Where do you think you're going?
Nimue: To give birth to a new world!
Hellboy: Yeah, by killing a lot of innocent people!
*She makes Hellboy kneel.*
Nimue: Why do you fight for those who hate and fear you? All I wanted was revenge, until I saw you. You can usher in the apocalypse. Out of the ashes, a new Eden will emerge. Leave these frail, pathetic humans behind. Be my king. And be revered for who you really are. We belong together, you and I.
Hellboy: We do! But it's not gonna work, you know,'cause I'm a Capricorn and you're fucking nuts!
*She makes him fall to the ground.*
Nimue: A demon sleeps inside you, and I will waken it.
Alice: Hellboy! Hellboy!
*As Alice reaches the top of the hill, Nimue takes off a piece of her crown and throws it into Alice’s neck.*
Nimue: Even if I have to take away everything and everyone you've ever loved.
Morbius: Leroy Jenkins!
*She telekinetically throws Morbius back.*
Luffy: Gum gum-
*He then crashes into Luffy. Nimue then goes through the portal. Hellboy rushes over to Alice.*
Hellboy: I got you, kid.
Daimio: Congratulations, the Blood Queen has all her powers now.
Morbius: She needs medical attention, now!
Ganeida: Don't touch it! It'll only make it spread faster.
*Hellboy gets angry and grabs her by the throat with his right hand.*
Hellboy: You got three seconds to make this right!
Ganeida: I can't.
Hellboy: Three.
Geneida: Nimue's power is too strong.
Hellboy: Two.
Ganeida: There is one who can help you from the Old World.
Hellboy: Where?
Daimio: You're not seriously gonna listen to her! She could be leading us straight into a trap!
Ganeida: You can save your friend.
*Hellboy lets her go and grabs Alice.*
Hellboy: We don't have a choice.
Luffy: So where do we go, witch lady?
Ganeida: Go to Black Fin. High atop the cliffs there's an old goat path hidden in the rocks. The way is treacherous, but you must follow it until you can go no further. There, you'll find a passage into the bowels of the Earth, in a cave. The one you seek is there. Merlin the Wise. Wizard to kings, and king of fools. Cursed to live forever buried in a hole for allowing Arthur to betray the truce.

*Hellboy and the others reach the cave that Ganeida pointed them to and find Merlin’s coffin. Hellboy opens it and frees the wizard.*
Merlin: Have you finally come to claim my soul?
Hellboy: That's the other guy. Come on! My friend's been poisoned, and we were told that you can help!
*Merlin examines Alice’s injury.*
Luffy: Is she gonna be ok?
Merlin: I have seen this before. This is Nimue's work. You cannot underestimate this witch. She is evil incarnate. There's still a chance if we act quickly. But you must promise me something in return. That you will do whatever is necessary to destroy Nimue, no matter the cost.
Hellboy: I can damn well guarantee it.
*Merlin chants a spell and removes the twig from Alice’s neck.*
Daimio: Should we be worried about where that's going?
*The twig crawls away but Morbius crushes it with his foot.*
Morbius: It’s not going anywhere now. Hehehe.
Hellboy: Hey. Hey. Welcome back.
Alice: Who's the new guy?
Hellboy: You wouldn't believe me if I told you.
Luffy: He’s a wizard!
*Merlin then uses his magic to put Alice, Daimio, Luffy and Morbius in a sleep-like trance.*
Hellboy: Hey, hey! Why did you do that?
Merlin: Let your friends rest. They'll be fine.
What comes next is for you and you alone.
Hellboy, your story whispered itself into my ear and I realized fate had something else in store for us both.
Hellboy: Okay.
Merlin: Tell me, are there still tales of King Arthur in your time? How he drew the sword from the stone?
Hellboy: Uh, yeah. Movies, too. He's a regular pop culture phenom.
Merlin: Give me your hand.
*He cut’s Hellboy’s left hand and collects his blood in a skull.*
Merlin: People believe that Arthur's lineage died with him, but it's not true. The bloodline continued when Arthur had a daughter and that daughter had a daughter, and so on. Ending with Sarah Bethany Hughes. She used to fly to the Sabbath on the back of a demon in the shape of a goat. And on Walpurgis Night, 1574, she married that demon. That very night she was taken down to hell,where she delivered a son, Anung un Rama.
Hellboy: That last part, I've heard that before. What is that?
Merlin: It's you... Anung un Rama. Destroyer of all things. The title you were given on the day you were born.
Hellboy: So, my mother was human.
Merlin: And so are you. At least in part. Son of Arthur, last of the royal lineage. Blood of his blood. Destined to be king of man. Which is why I know you are the only one who can do what must be done.
*Merlin pours Hellboy’s blood into a pool of water, causing a rock to rise from it with Excalibur embedded in the rock.*
Merlin: Excalibur, the one weapon that can stand against Nimue.
Hellboy: Ah, looks bigger in the cartoon.
Merlin: Only a true descendant of Arthur can wield it. It is your birthright, Hellboy, your destiny. This is how you will destroy the Blood Queen.
*Hellboy approaches the sword and prepares to grab it. But once he touches it, he sees a vision of him riding on a flaming dragon in a blazing wasteland and begins to slaughter humans with the sword. This prompts Hellboy to not take it.*
Merlin: No! You gave me your word! Take the sword before it's too late! Take it! Take it now!
*The sword disappears.*
Merlin: You fool! I used the last of my magic to bring Excalibur here. Now the sword has returned to Arthur, the only man worthy of it. You could've stopped her. At least I won't be here to watch the world wither and die.
*Merlin’s body begins to wither and crumble.*

*In London, Nimue begins to spread her flesh eating plague upon the city.*
Gruagach: Run! Yeah, go on, run. You pathetic bastards.

Reporter: So far, the British government has failed to pinpoint the origin of the plague which is spreading at an unprecedented rate. The Prime Minister has declared an official state of emergency and is urging British citizens to remain indoors and to avoid contact with anyone who may be infected. Casualties are expected to reach 100,000 within two hours, with the British plague spreading to the EU resulting in massive fatalities over the next 24 hours and threatening to spark a global epidemic.
Broom: Listen up, ladies and gentlemen. The shit has gone way beyond the fan. Out there, there's a fifth century sorceress and her pig monster, who want to bring down the curtain on London and the world. Now, please tell me where the fuck they are!

*Nimue and Gruagach enter the fish and chips shop.*
Mrs. Harker: I need to see some ID, love.
*But when Nimue doesn’t reply, she pulls out a gun and shoots her.*

*Broom hears gunfire from upstairs.*

*Hellboy and the others exit the cave.*
Daimio: You gonna tell us what happened down there? Where's Gandalf?
Hellboy: He's dead. He offered me the sword, Excalibur. He said it was the only way to kill the Blood Queen.
Luffy: The Wizard gave you the sword in the stone?
Daimio: All right, so where is it?
Hellboy: I didn't take the sword.
Morbius: Why not? If it's the only known weapon that can kill the Blood Queen, that's a pretty big reason to take it.
Hellboy: 'Cause if I do, I'm the guy who's gonna bring about the end of the world.
Daimio: You're the guy who's going to bring about the end of the world? Get over yourself.
Alice: Daimio!
Daimio: We've got a job to do.
*Daimio gets a call on his phone and answers it.*
Daimio: We've got to go.
Hellboy: What's wrong?
Daimio: The Blood Queen just took out the B.P.R.D.
Hellboy: Dad.