love in a vial
It’s only a few weeks into the summer when Melina pulls Layla aside. Layla had never been into Melina’s office before, it had been forbidden. Melina was such a tidy and meticulous person so seeing papers spread out everywhere, tacked to the wall and covering her desk, was odd.
Melina moves toward her desk, sweeping the papers up into a neat stack and putting them away in a filing cabinet tucked in the corner. “Sit on the desk.” Melina orders her.
Layla hesitates briefly before she approaches the desk, hoisting herself up on it. She didn’t know what was going on but she was in no place to ask questions, especially when Melina had been snappy the past few days. She watches as Melina moves toward a box on a table filled with various equipment that she had only seen in the infirmary at the Red Room.
“The General wants a health report,” Melina tells Layla, turning toward her and approaching. “Arm out.”
Layla wonders if the girls were going to get the same physical. She didn’t think it would go over well, especially when she herself was already so unnerved. She sticks her arm out obediently and Melina secures a cuff around it.
Layla was stiff as she had her vitals taken. She doesn’t think she’s ever been in such close proximity with Melina before except to receive punishments. It’s unnerving how close the woman was and it takes everything in Layla not to lean away from her.
“I’m going to give you something to help you keep up on your health with your rigorous training,” Melina tells her and Layla watches as Melina pulls out an injection. She wanted it nowhere near her and she grips the edge of the table to stop herself from bolting. The color inside the needle was bright red, an unnatural color that Layla was pretty sure should not be injected into the bloodstream. “Roll up your sleeve and show me the crook of your elbow.”
Layla tugs her sleeve up a few inches to reveal her arm, holding it out. Melina reaches out to grip her arm, her hold surprisingly gentle. Melina sets the injection aside as she ties a tourniquet around Layla’s upper arm. Layla barely feels the needle as Melina swiftly injects the contents of the needle into her bloodstream.
“Sit there for a few minutes,” Melina orders as she pulls the needle out and pressed a cotton ball against the skin. “Hold that there.”
Layla does, watching Melina dispose of the used needle and scribbles on one of the pieces of paper.
“You are to report to me if you start to feel unwell,” Melina orders, glancing back at Layla. “You are to return here at the exact same time daily to check in with me.”
Layla frowns slightly at the odd instructions. “Yes, ma’am.” She says before she hesitates. “Are the girls going to receive physicals as well?”
“No. They haven’t hit puberty yet,” Melina replies, focused entirely on whatever she had been making notes of. Silence blankets the office and Layla peers around it once again.
Layla knew that the girls could only keep out of trouble for so long, Yelena wanted to get into anything and everything and Natalia was usually unsure of how to stop her. “May I be dismissed?”
“No.” Melina’s answer takes her by surprise. “You’re dismissed when I dismiss you.”
Layla sighs slightly and focuses her attention on some of the papers pinned to the wall. The writing is in a language she’s unfamiliar with, although she’s sure that’s not an accident. There are a few numbers littered throughout the pages that Layla focuses on.
Layla’s gaze continues to wander the room, her head feeling a little hazy. She assumed it was just from the needle, she always felt unwell after her trips to medical. She didn’t even realize the time had passed until Melina was suddenly standing in front of her. “You’re dismissed.” Melina tells her, eyeing her closely. “Remember what I said.”
Layla nods her head and Melina steps back to let Layla scoot off the table. Layla nearly lost her balance but she had been sitting for so long that she figured she pinched a nerve. She heads back to her bedroom where the girls had settled and luckily had not gotten into any trouble.
She’s exhausted from the whole ordeal. She shouldn’t be but she just wants to lay down and sleep. Natalia eyes her when Layla sits on her bed. Yelena immediately moves to clamber on her, shoving a toy in her face with a plea to play with her.
Layla instead moves to flop back on the bed, taking Yelena with her. The young girl shrieks with giggles at the action, sitting up on Layla’s stomach, and demands for her to do it again. Layla instead rolls over to gently squish Yelena between her and the bed, feeling the girl giggle again as she wiggles under her.
She can feel Natalia’s eyes on her the whole time but she’s far too tired to think about why she was being scrutinized so closely. She closes her eyes and when Yelena settles, rolling onto her back and tucking Yelena against her side as she falls asleep.
Layla wakes up to the moon shining onto her face, Yelena a dead weight on her chest. She knows she fell asleep before dinner and the fact that Yelena hasn’t moved scares her slightly. She shifts the girl as she sits up, tucking her onto the bed.
Something wet drips onto her t-shirt and she rubs her hand across her face, her hand coming back red. Layla stares at it before standing, the floor creaking under her feet.
Natalia startles awake at this, having been asleep in the corner. A pang of guilt fills Layla at the sight of her, her back pressed against the door. There’s something so young as Natalia rubs her eyes, and Layla crouches down in front of her.
“Did you eat?” She asks, and Natalia shakes her head, reaching her hand out to touch Layla’s nose. Natalia sticks her hand into Layla’s face, showing her the blood.
“You’re hurt,” She states.
Layla shakes her head. “No. Do you want a sandwich?”
A few minutes later finds Layla creeping around the kitchen quietly, a tissue pressed to her nose as she makes sandwiches. She could go without food but the girls were too young to do that. There’s movement on the stairs and Layla expects to see Natalia but instead, it’s Melina, a hard expression on her face. Layla freezes.
Melina walks over to her and grabs her face, twisting it both ways roughly. “How did you get hurt?”
“I woke up with my nose bleeding,” Layla replies, straightening her posture. “It won’t happen again, ma’am.”
She braces for a hit that never comes. Melina just surveys her before stepping back. “Do not leave your room at this hour again.”
Layla nods, waiting until Melina leaves to finish making the sandwiches, slipping back into her room. Natalia had woken up Yelena, who reached up her arms sleepily to Layla. Layla takes her, giving a sandwich to Natalia as she does so.
Yelena grabs her cheeks before Layla can sit down properly. “You’ve got a boo-boo, Mama.”
Layla automatically reaches her hand up to her nose, feeling the dried blood under her fingertips. “It’s not a boo-boo. It doesn’t hurt, see?” Layla pokes at her nose slightly.
Yelena’s eyes well with tears. “You’ve got an owie.” She emphasizes the second word, looking toward Natalia. “Nattie, look!”
Natalia sits next to Yelena on the bed, giving Layla a worried look before turning to her little sister. “No owie. Layla is okay.”
Natalia didn’t believe the words she was saying but Yelena seemed to, shaking her head again. “No!”
Layla carefully tears a piece of the sandwich she’d made Yelena off. “Do you want a sandwich? It’s peanut butter and grape jelly, your favorite.”
Yelena gives Layla an angry look before putting the food in her mouth. “You have a boo-boo.”
Layla sighs, racking her brain before her eyes land on the book they’d been reading earlier. “Do you want to fix my boo-boo?”
Yelena brightens, nodding. Layla hands her another piece of sandwich. “You need to kiss them. Like the mommy does in the book we read earlier.”
Yelena nods, clambering on Layla’s lap and kissing her nose. “Nattie, do it”
Natalia looks between Layla and Yelena cautiously before shaking her head. Yelena’s face crumples and Natalia kisses Layla’s nose before she could cry. Natalia rarely initiates affection between the two of them, and although Layla knows it’s just for Yelena, it makes her feel soft.
“All better?” Yelena asks, and Layla smiles at her, poking her nose.
“All better.” Layla continues to hand her pieces of the sandwich until there’s none left. Yelena’s hands are sticky but Layla doesn’t risk leaving her room again, accepting the stickiness she will inevitably wake up to.
Yelena falls asleep quickly and Natalia moves to sit next to Layla, grabbing her face and checking her over. The gesture is gentler than Melina’s.
“Are you really not hurt?” Natalia whispers in Russian, giving a careful look towards Yelena.
“I’m not hurt,” Layla confirms, wrapping an arm around Natalia’s waist. The girl sits stiffly for a moment before relaxing into Layla’s hold. Her body is warm against Layla’s and she is hit by how alive Natalia is, how young she is. Too young to be taking part in this.
“Did Melina hurt you?”
Layla shakes her head. “No one hurt me.” She pauses, before adding. “I won’t let anyone hurt you either. You or Yelena.”
“I am a Widow. I am made of marble,” Natalia rattles off. “Each punishment I get makes me a better Widow.”
“You are Natasha now,” Layla says. “We are a happy family living in Ohio. I am your cousin. We are not Widows right now.”
“We still do training,” Natalia points out.
Layla nods. “But we are also a happy family. I will not let you or Yelena get hurt because then that wouldn’t be true. It’s for the best of the mission.”
Natalia seems to accept this, relaxing back against Layla. “Okay. But you can’t get hurt then, okay?”
“Melina didn’t hurt me,” Layla reiterates, not answering the question. She squeezes Natalia with her arm before letting her go. “Do you want to sleep in my bed with Yelena and me or on your bed on the floor?”
Natalia hesitates. “With you?”
Layla lies in bed with the girls pressed against her stomach, their breathing steady as they sleep. Melina didn’t hurt her when she was caught and it confuses her - Layla is used to punishment for the smallest thing, and she knows she wasn’t allowed out at night. Something has changed and she can’t quite put her finger on what.
Layla arrives at Melina’s office at the same time the next day, exhaustion still permeating her every movement. Her vision seemed delayed, time feeling chunky and disorganized, but Layla supposes that’s because of how tired she feels.
Melina’s desk is already cleared and Melina points to it when Layla enters. “Sit.” Melina orders and Layla approaches the wooden desk, hoisting herself up to sit on it. She watches Melina flip through the notes and waits patiently.
Melina takes her vitals just as she did the previous day before she grips Layla’s face, this time much gentler than the previous night. “Any more nosebleeds?”
“No.” Layla replies, feeling much like a bug under a microscope as Melina inspects her closely. She doesn’t quite know what the older Widow is searching for but she sits still.
“Any other symptoms?” Melina lets her go and steps back, scanning Layla’s full body.
“No.” Layla’s exhausted but that’s not a symptom. That’s just a result of her being up in the middle of the night. Melina eyes her closely before she nods her head.
“Alright. You’re dismissed.” She waves her hand in dismissal and Layla blinks in confusion because she had expected… something more? It had all seemed too easy but she’s not going to complain about it being simple.
Layla slides off the table, leaving Melina’s office, and heads toward where she knew the girls would be in Yelena’s room.
Her exhaustion seems to wane as the day progresses although she does keep knocking down the tower she was helping Yelena build. She kept misjudging the distance when stacking blocks but she just chalks it up to being tired once again. Yelena didn’t seem to mind anyway, laughing as she swipes the rest of the tower over to start again.
Layla can hear Alexei arrive home that night by the sound of the front door slamming and she already dreaded dinner because she knew for a fact that he was in a bad mood and would undoubtedly be drinking.
Dinner was a quiet affair mostly, Melina and Natalia were also able to pick up on Alexei’s sour mood. Melina doesn’t shoot Layla any looks each time Layla quiets Yelena down when she gets too loud.
Dinner was almost over and uneventful when Layla once again misjudges distance and she knocks her glass of water off the table and it shatters on the ground. She freezes, scooting her chair out to put herself between Alexei and Yelena when Alexei’s eyes fall onto the water pooled on the ground with shards of glass.
“What kind of a graceful Widow are you?” Alexei spits, slamming his bottle of beer onto the table as he stands to look down at Layla. “Can a man not come home and enjoy his meal in peace?”
Layla doesn’t know if he wants an actual response or if he wanted her to stay quiet. She flinches slightly when Alexei reaches out to grab her shirt and yank her closer.
“Hmm? Are you deaf as well now?” He demands, his eyes narrowing at her.
“I’m sorry…” Layla manages to get out, every muscle in her body tense as she prepares for a strike. “It was-- I didn’t mean-- I--”
“Spit it out!” Alexei demands, jerking her shirt up to force her to her tiptoes. “I expect an answer when I ask a question.”
“I--” Layla can’t seem to make her mouth work right. “I didn’t-- It--” She falls silent instead, deciding that being quiet would get her in less trouble than stuttering like a fool.
Alexei raised his hand and Layla braced herself for a hit.
“Alexei.” Melina interrupts and Alexei’s head jerks toward her. “You’re going to leave a mark. That’s enough.”
Alexei scowls at her interruption but shoves Layla back. Layla stumbles backward, her foot landing on a piece of broken glass as she slips on the spilled water and tumbles ungracefully to the ground. Alexei snatches his bottle of beer up and stomps from the room.
Layla turns to look at the girls when he’s gone but their chairs are empty and they’re no longer at the table. She moves to stand up, wincing at the water soaking into her pants.
“Sit down.” Melina orders her and Layla lowers herself back before she could pull herself up all the way. “Don’t be foolish. Walking around with glass in your foot will track blood everywhere.”
“I--” Layla moves to try and speak again, her eyes watching Melina grab a dish towel and a broom. “It was…”
“Quiet.” Melina orders again and Layla closes her mouth, watching Melina approach the mess. Instead of forcing Layla to clean it up, Melina carefully mops the water up and cleans the shards of glass from the floor. Layla watches her, waiting for Melina to do or say something.
Melina leaves the room with the wet towel and glass shards. Layla stays seated on the floor because Melina hadn’t dismissed her yet. She instead moves to inspect her foot, grimacing at the small piece of glass embedded in the arch of her foot. She reaches out to grasp it when Melina appears again.
“Let that go.” Melina tells her firmly and Layla pulls her hand away. Melina crouches down in front of her with a set of tweezers and a small roll of bandages. Melina grasps Layla’s ankle and pulls it into her lap. “I want you to recite the alphabet for me.”
Layla blinks at the odd request, watching as Melina inspects her foot.
“Now.” Melina’s tone hardens and Layla flinches slightly.
She opens her mouth to start but quickly realizes that she can’t form the right letters. She knows what she wants to say, she long ago learned the English alphabet, but her mouth isn’t cooperating.
She had only managed to struggle halfway through by the time Melina extracts the piece of glass and bandages her foot.
Melina pushed Layla’s foot out of her lap and set it back on the ground before leaning forward. “Look at me. Follow my finger with your eyes.”
Layla does so, watching Melina frown slightly.
“Have you had any more nosebleeds? Headaches? Blurry vision?” Melina lists and Layla shakes her head. “Have you hit your head?”
“No.” Layla mumbles, shaking her head once again.
Melina nods her head, standing up and holding her hand out to help Layla up.
Widows were not taught to help each other up. It was every man for themselves and for Melina to do so struck Layla as odd. Still, Layla doesn’t want to get into any more trouble so she reaches out and takes it. Melina pulls her up to her feet, Layla wincing when she puts weight on her injured foot.
“Go to bed.” Melina says quietly and Layla frowns. It was very early, much too early to even think about going to bed. “Now.” Melina adds on when Layla doesn’t move.
Layla slips from the room, barely pausing as she passes the living room as she sees Alexei sitting on the couch watching television.
She wakes up in the morning not remembering how she got to bed.