Chapter 15
As soon as Loki heard that Jolene was supposedly attacked he wanted to go see her and he didn’t want to leave you alone so he took you along with him, on the way you noticed how fidgety he seemed so you placed your hand on his shoulder to give him a soothing squeeze, you knew he was only blaming himself for this, he looked at you and he seemed terrified. Did she say Thor visited her? And that’s when you remembered about that man you had bumped into at the steak house.
“Ummm Loki?” He hummed as you called out for him.
“What happened to Thor?” You asked him and his eyes welled up even more.
“I sent him away along with mother"
You remembered his mother, she seemed like a nice lady but equally delusional as her husband, though you learned later that she never wanted to be a part of this cruelty but then what did she do to stop him?
"I bumped into a man that day at the steak house, when we went there with Jolene” you gulped nervously, you probably should have told him about this.
“What man?"
"I don’t know ummm..he had a mask on..but I felt as if I knew him..It could have been Thor” his head turned so fast towards you that you feared he must have suffered whiplash.
"Why the fuck you won’t tell me that?“ His jaw clenched as he questioned, he was trying to control his anger you could tell but you still felt scared.
"I didn’t want to assume the worst and cause panic” you said to him meekly and he shook his head in disbelief.
“Knowing far too well that Odin is out there you didn’t think it was important for you to share that information with me?” Your eyes teared up but you couldn’t say anything, you didn’t want him to get more upset.
“I’m sorry I should have"
"Yeah you fucking should have” as he stepped out of the car, he slammed the door shut making you flinch in response.
“You need an invite or something to come out?” He tapped on your window so you shook your head. He was too busy being worried about Jolene at the moment that he missed the signs of you feeling scared. The sudden yelling, him shutting the door so loudly, raising his voice at you, all of this had triggered a response, it reminded you of your mom and dad, it reminded you of all the bad memories you had suppressed.
If something was to happen to Jolene he would never forgive himself, he left her there all alone, but why would Thor attack her? Why was he even back now? Did Odin find him? He knew mother was susceptible to the manipulation but after all these years did Thor really wanted to follow Odin still?
You followed him into the building and as soon as you both reached her apartment she jumped into his arms.
“Ohh God Loki I am so scared” she cried furiously and you just stood there quietly, you didn’t know what you were supposed to say, Loki was already upset with you for not telling him about the man you bumped into and you didn’t want to piss him off further.
“You’re okay darling..you are okay” he whispered softly to comfort her and it made your eyes tear up, this probably wasn’t the time to feel hurt or jealous but you still felt that way. He looked at you and gestured you to close the door so you obliged immediately, your sullen face didn’t go unnoticed by him, he probably shouldn’t have gotten so upset but you should have told him about that man, if he had any suspicion that Thor was around then he wouldn’t have left Jolene here by herself.
He went to the kitchen after he made her sit down on the couch, then he offered her the water to drink. As soon as he sat down next to her she hugged him again “When did it happen jo?"
"Right before I called you, he was in my bedroom when I came out after bathing, he manhandled me badly and threatened me to tell him about you but I didn’t say a word Loki, i somehow ran out and locked him inside the bedroom, told him that I’d call the cops ..that’s when he jumped out of the window” she sobbed as she finished recalling the incident, you felt bad for her but for some reason you didn’t want to believe her.
“Are you sure it was ..Thor?"
"Why else would he address himself as your brother Loki?” She asked him so e sighed.
“You’re right"
He asked her to pack her things and then he drove her back to the apartment with you. He was confused, how did Thor even find out where Jolene was? If he was the man you saw at the restaurant then why didn’t he follow him instead of Jolene? He looked at you and you had your head turned towards the window, he was really harsh with you and he now he was feeling bad about it, this day couldn’t have been worse he thought but as soon as you all entered the apartment Jolene fainted so he picked her up and laid her down on his bed.
"Should we call a doctor or something?” You asked him so he sighed..
“No she faints whenever she’s extremely stressed, she’ll be fine..i should make dinner for us” you hummed as he said that, of course he knew that, he was her husband, how lucky she was that he wifed her up once.
As you both stepped out of his room he grabbed your arm, just his touch brought you to tears for some reason.
“Don’t hide such things from me darling, what if something awful would have happened today?” You nodded as he said that but you didn’t say anything because you knew your voice would come out all broken and sad “Help me with dinner please?” He asked you so you nodded.
“Thanks for doing my room today ” he smiled as he took his jacket off first, then the shirt followed, he put on an apron after that to protect himself from spills and heat.
“What are we making?”
“Chili probably? You like that"
You nodded as he said that, he took the can of beans out from the fridge but it slipped from his hand and fell down.
"Fucking hell” he yelled in frustration and that was enough to make you shrivel up, he immediately reached closer to you and picked you up to make you sit on the counter, he could tell you were about to panic and that’s when he realized that it was a build up of everything that had happened today, him being upset with you in the car must have been the final nail in the coffin, he should have seen the signs and calmed you down.
“Hey hey sweetheart..just breathe for me okay..take a deep breath..can you?” He whispered softly as he cupped your cheeks to peck your lips.
“Can't…breathe” you gulped for air as you mumbled, one of his hands rubbed your back while the other one stayed on your neck so he could keep your eyes on him, his thumb pressed your chin up and as you looked up his eyes were soaked too.
“Keep your eyes on me, yeah? You’re okay sweetheart, I’m here..you’re safe I promise..now take a slow and deep breath for me” your sobs controlled slightly as his sweet calm voice filled your ears, you inhaled sharply on his command and then you repeated it “That’s it..that’s it…good girl.. good girl, one more time okay ” he cooed so you nodded, you breathed in sharply then you clutched onto his apron to hug him tightly, you hid your face in the crook of his neck and as the sweet scent of musk and sandalwood clouded your senses you suddenly felt so calm.
You were holding onto him so tightly that he felt suffocated, in a good way though, all the best ways if he was being honest with himself, that’s what you both needed after this day.
“Sorry dadddy…I’m sorry I didn’t tell you" your voice came out all muffled.
"Shhhhh, it’s okay, I was just scared at the moment and snapped, I’m sorry too baby” you pulled away from him as he said that.
“I know..i know you are worried about her"
"Not just her, he could have harmed you, I’m trying to protect you but I can’t when I don’t know who else is out there and wants to hurt you, you’re the most important thing to me, you know that right?” Your eyes welled up with fresh tears. You sobbed furiously as you nodded so he hugged you again and once your crying stopped he kissed you, he felt awful about it now, he should have been more careful, you had repressed memories of your parents. There were plenty of times when he had found you hiding somewhere in the center crying your eyes out because your parents were fighting, screaming and yelling at each other.
"Am I forgiven?“ He mumbled softly and it made you smile.
"Yesss..You’ll sleep with me tonight right?"
"Mmmhmmm you want me to?" he asked as kissed your fingers one by one.
"Pleasseee"
"You like sleeping with me?"
"Always did"
"Yeahhh?" he kissed your forehead and it made you giddy.
"Mmmmhmmm..Do you like it?"
"Abso-fucking-loutely"
Your face flushed and you giggled like a schoolgirl.
The moment didn’t last though as you noticed Jolene standing in the living room from your peripheral vision so he looked to the side as well, then he stepped away quickly.
"Hey…ummm..how are you feeling?” He walked towards the refrigerator to take out the gallon of orange juice, she continued to stare at him as he poured it in a glass for her, you wanted to roll your eyes but resisted the urge. She didn’t like you and feelings were mutual.
“Fine I guess .. I’m still in shock” she rubbed her arms to comfort herself and his brows furrowed.
“I’m sorry Jo” he mumbled softly so she walked towards him and hugged him.
“It’s not your fault Loki, i shouldn’t have come here, I got myself into this so please don’t blame yourself” well she wasn’t lying at least you thought.
“I’ll talk to Steve asap"
"Don’t bother him, he’s on a vacation with Peggy” he hummed in acknowledgement as she said that.
“I have been trying to reach him for a week now"
"You know how she gets..no phones on vacation” she smiled and he returned it.
She talked to him as if she was still his wife and that bothered you to no end.
"Here..sip on this.. dinner will be ready soon" he said to her and as he turned his back towards her, she glared at you.
“Need any help? Wouldn’t want you to do this all alone” she said to him so he shook his head.
“Y/n is helping, you just sit down and rest okay?” Her face fell as he said that. Poor thing.
“Yeah Jo you definitely need rest"
You smiled at her, pretending to be innocent so Loki looked at you and gave you the eyes. He knew you inside out.
After dinner he prepared a warm glass of almond milk for her and gave it to you so you could keep it in her room, he wanted to shower before sleeping. As you reached her room she was on the bed, reading a book so you put the glass on the bedside drawer and turned around to leave but then you heard her voice,
"You really think he loves you don’t you?” You turned to look at her and she was smiling.
“Why are you so salty? You left him"
"I made a mistake..he loved me so much”
“He was also lonely and you fucking abandoned him after he trusted you enough to marry your bitch ass"
She got visibly furious as you said that.
"And he still came back for me, after our divorce I invited him to my birthday party, he thought I wanted to reconcile but when I said no he begged on his knees in front of my family and friends so I’d take him back, he was pathetic like a lovesick puppy for me, you have no idea how much he loved me. Atleast he didn’t feel pity or sorry for me like he does with you” your eyes teared up as she said that, the image of him crying and begging in front of all those strangers made your heart clench, the fact that she was boasting only made you want to rip her eyes out. All of a sudden you didn’t feel bad about Thor attacking her.
“I know he loved you jo but you didn’t love him, not in the ways he deserves to be loved so let me tell you one thing, whether he loves me or not is absolutely insignificant here, I’m not fighting for him to love me, I’m fighting to love him and I’ll continue to do it unlike you”
She chuckled and clapped slowly to mock you after you finished speaking.
“An actress indeed huh? You have no idea what he has done in life, his secrets will take a toll on you someday and you’ll do the same thing, mark my words he’ll be back to me when he gets his heart broken again” you snickered as she said that.
“Try your best Jolene but we aren’t competing any longer.. he’s mine and you can’t take away my man just because you think you can” you smiled and you had just one more thing to say to her, you wanted her to cry herself to sleep for what she had done to Loki “Ohh by the way he’s not alone anymore, he hasn’t been for four years and he’ll never ever be alone again because I’ll always be there for him, withhhh him”
Her jaw clenched so harshly that you feared she’d break her teeth. You stormed out of his room, leaving her to sulk and curse you, you really needed her to get out of your life for good. She was manipulative as fuck you could tell.
As you stepped inside your bedroom you didn’t find him there, he was still showering, you changed out of your clothes and put on a night dress, it was skimpy and sexy, perfect for the night, you wanted to tease him a little. You sat down on the bed and waited for him to come out, like usual he came out with just a towel wrapped around his waist. His hair was dripping all over the floor but you didn’t care, you felt jealous of the floor instead, you wanted him to drip all over you, have his body on top of you so close that you’d feel suffocated by his scent and his warm breath.
“Naughty girl, what’s going on in that pretty head of yours?” You snapped out of your thoughts as he said that “Give me something to wear?” He smirked so you stood up and walked towards the closet to take out a boxer brief, you threw it at him and he caught it but he didn’t put it on “Maybe I should cash in on that show you promised me?” He smirked and threw the briefs right back at you. Your face heated up immediately and you felt weak in the knees as he pulled up a chair right in front of the bed and sat down on it with his legs wide open, his modesty still covered by that black towel, his abs flexed with every breath he took.
“What do you mean?” You mumbled nervously, feigning innocence but he wasn’t falling for it.
“Come on baby..lets pretend I’m not even here, let’s pretend that it’s just one of those nights when you felt so desperate that you’d hump a fucking brief of mine to pleasure yourself"
Your breath hitched sharply at his words, you have done it a plenty of times but in the privacy of your own room, doing it in front of him felt audacious but it also excited you.
You got on top of the bed and laid down, your dress rode up to your thighs, he only had the side view and he couldn’t see your cunt which seemed perfect to him, he wanted to ruin you slowly. You had his briefs clutched into your fist, you felt nervous and slightly awkward, he noticed that
"Panties off baby, relax for me yeah?"
He mumbled softly, he brought his chair even closer, you could smell the citrus fruity essence of bergamot bodywash.
You slid down your panties slowly by lifting your hips up and the look in his eyes darkened, for a moment he felt like the degenerate he has always been, this was his sweet buttons, his precious princess and he felt like a pervert watching her like this but as soon as you moaned all his thoughts disappeared.
"Show me baby, rub it against your wet dripping cunt, that’s how you did it right?"
"Mmmhmmm dadddy” you placed his briefs right over your clit and clenched your thighs together, your hips moved slowly but obscenely to build a slow sensation .
“Ohhh lokiiiii” the moan of his name from your mouth made him curse under his breath. He took the towel off so you turned your head to the side, the sight of his big hard cock laying flat against his torso made your mouth water, you craved a taste but you knew he intended to starve you for as long as he could.
“What did you think about sweetheart? pictured my cock rubbing over your clit instead? Tell me all the dirty thoughts you had in your pretty little head” he whispered, his voice remained low and sensuous, he gripped his cock in his fist and the sight almost demolished you.
“Mmmmmhmmm, pictured you on top of me, the tip of your cock rubbing over my clit slowly, up and down, over and over again until it’s all coated with your precum"
"Fucking hell sweetheart" he inhaled sharply as he fondled himself, you grabbed a pillow and turned to the side before you put in between your thighs, you needed something firm, you always fantasized that you were dry humping him instead. You closed your eyes as you felt bashful by your own debauchery, the pace of your hips increased as the sensation built slowly, the sounds of your moans filled the room, he wished he could have watched your hips jiggling with every hump but all in good time hopefully.
"Open your eyes darling, watch me” he commanded you so you opened them, the sight of him jerking off as you humped against his briefs felt cathartic “Such a dirty whore..look at you, so desperate for my cock that you had to steal my underwear huhh?" you bit on your lips as he said that.
Mmmm I’m your whore daddy..all yours"
"You’re mine ..fuckk show me them pretty titties baby” he whispered as he increased his pace, you never thought you’d ever see this day where he’d get himself off to you. For you.
You stopped humping and sat up, you got closer to the edge dragging the pillow with you, you rolled up his briefs into a ball and placed it over the pillow then you sat down on your knees with it between your legs, you were too turned on to even care now.
He wanted to see your titties and you’d give him everything he’d ever ask for, you pulled your dress up and you were all naked like he was, watching your soaked cunt made his mouth salivate but he controlled his urges. He can’t treat you the way he had treated other women.
You bounced up and down on the pillow, your breasts jiggled with every thrust and he kept cursing under his breath, the perverted side of him continued to remind him of what he was doing and it only excited him further.
“I can’t wait to suck your cock daddy, you will let me do that right?” You mumbled and whined at the same time, he chuckled at your desperation. He loves you, in all the ways a man could ever love a woman.
“Definitely my perfect little whore, can’t wait to shove my cock deep down your throat and have you choke on it, you’d look even prettier all messed up for me.. now be a good little whore and squeeze those titties for me sweetheart, pinch them, hurt yourself a little for me” you moaned as his filthy words melted in your ears, you had a feeling you’d cum just by listening to him degrade you like this. You followed his instructions like a good girl. He was supposed to be patient but he couldn’t do it, he was going to feel awful about this later but right now in that moment nothing else mattered to him. He wanted to own you and hurt you.
“Dadddy I’m close" you whimpered.
"I know baby.. so am I..fuck…cum sweetheart let it go and then I’m going to cum all over your skin” he cursed as he stood up, his free hand wrapped around your throat but he wasn’t putting any pressure, his cock so close to your mouth that you wanted to taste him but you also wanted to take as much as he was giving you, you didn’t want to disobey him at all.
All of this was too much for your virgin self and your orgasm washed over you like a strong wave, you closed your eyes as you saw the stars flashing , the sound of your moans and the loud roar of his name was enough to shatter him too, he pointed his cock over your tits and sprayed his cum all over them. As his warm cum smeared over your skin you moaned his name loudly. He felt so good, so sated, he felt weak in the knees as the strong release almost knocked him out, no words were said for a while, only the sound of your breathings were heard.
You looked down at your breasts and your face heated up, you have had dreams like this for as long as you could remember.
“You alright sweet thing?” He cooed softly as he bent down a little to pick you up in his arms like a ragdoll, wrapping your legs around his waist he took you to the bathroom. You didn’t say a word, you couldn’t stop staring at him, admiring him, you felt even more smitten then before. He was so perfect you wanted to cry. So beautiful.
“Sayy something darling ” he whispered and as the warm water hit your body you came out of the trance, then you kissed him passionately.
“That was so good, I have never had such an experience before” he smiled a little as you said that but he could see the bruise starting to form on your breasts and then he started to feel awful, why did he ask you to do that? Why couldn’t he control himself? He truly was a selfish monster who could never love selflessly.
“Does it hurt?” He asked you so you looked down.
“Noooo .. Loki..Nooo it’s all good I promise..i promise it’s good I loved it” he gulped as you said that, his eyes teared up a little when you hugged him. After showering he took you back to the bedroom and dressed you up, then he cleaned up the mess you had made before you both laid down on the bed.
“Your cock is exquisite” he chuckled as you said that,
“So is your cunt, so perfect"
He whispered in your ear before he kissed you "You don’t have to do everything I ask you to do when we are playing with each other.. okay? You can just say no and I’d never be upset or hurt, you hear me? Tell me that you understand what I’m saying right now” he knew you would never not want to do anything he asked you so he really wanted to make sure that you knew your limits because the moment he makes you do something you didn’t want to do would also be the moment he would fall apart beyond repair.
“I understand daddy, I promise.. i just liked doing it, it wasn’t too painful, it hurt but in a good way” you mumbled softly so he nodded.
“I want to make you feel good sweetheart but I’m just too selfish to do that so please let me know whenever I’m hurting you in bed okay?” Your eyes teared up because he sounded so sad and broken. You knew you’d never be able to heal him completely but you wanted to change his thought process slowly.
“You don’t even know what that word means” you chuckled sarcastically so he looked at you confused “You’re anything but selfish Loki, I wouldn’t even be here if you were selfish so never ever say that again okay?”
His brows furrowed at the tenderness you showed him in the moment. He was too struck to even respond.
“Okay"
"Apologise now”
“I’m sorry baby.. we can also talk about the movie tomorrow okay?”
“Not doing it, anything that hurts us, not doing it” you whispered and his eyes welled up. He cuddled you into his arms and when you fell asleep he peppered kisses on your neck, he wanted to be so soft with you in bed, especially in bed, treat you the way he loved you but he was diseased and he didn’t think he’d ever be cured of it.
So he didn’t want to infect you too, you were as pure as they come so he wished to keep you like that, he never wanted to taint you by painting you in his colours.