Chapter 1
Doctor Stephen Strange had never been so nervous in his whole life.
Fourteen years of medical school? Cake walk. A two-year residency in the worst hospital in the worst part of the Bronx? Easy-peasy. Performing high-dexterity neurosurgery? He could do it in this sleep.
But the first Friday night in October was going to present the cocksure doctor with his most daunting task to date. A situation Stephen never thought he would find himself in.
He was going to meet his new boyfriend’s Little.
Just thinking about it made Stephen wonder if he had lost his mind. His initial profile on Platinum Singles stated that he was not interested in men with kids, Littles, dogs, cats, tarantulas…anything with a pulse, really. Stephen was quick to find that such harsh restrictions narrowed down his dating pool…drastically, especially within his age group. It was not long after curiosity (and loneliness) got the best of him, and Stephen begrudgingly scaled back the qualifiers.
That’s when Anthony Edward Stark’s picture appeared on his feed.
And what a picture it was. A swarthy man in a fitted t-shirt, a dark brown leather jacket to match his eyes. A smile; more of a laugh captured as a still. Messy hair and a tidy goatee. He was a graduate from MIT, worked for the best civil engineering company in New York…and, per the guidelines of Platinum Singles, he demonstrably made over five-hundred-thousand dollars a year.
There was just one catch, right at the bottom of his profile:
Father to the world’s most amazing Little boy. He’s been the best part of my life the last two years – so if you’re not into single dads, just swipe off!
There were no pictures of the boy on Tony’s dating profile, but the proud papa was quick to whip out a few during his and Stephen’s first date at the Rose Bath rooftop restaurant.
“His name’s Peter,” Tony’s smile rivaled the million-dollar panoramic view of the city, “he just turned twenty, but his headspace is about twenty-four to forty-eight months.”
Stephen had to admit; Peter was a cute kid. He had the biggest brown eyes the doctor was certain he had ever seen. Tony even felt brave enough to show Stephen a short video of him riding with Peter on the Central Park carousel. The boy was laughing and swinging his legs on either side of his horse as Tony attempted to keep him upright in his seat. Each time they came around to the camera woman (Tony’s assistant, Pepper) Tony would cajole Peter to turn and look at her and wave.
It was all very…sweet. Domestic, even.
Another picture, a clearly professional one, was of Peter attempting to show off every tooth in his head with a wide smile. He was dressed in a navy button down with a little red bow tie. The background was a faux forest scene.
“School picture?” Stephen asked.
“Yeah, I just got him enrolled at Midtown Littles Academy. I was worried about how he’d handle it since he’d never been to a Littles school before, but he really loves it!”
“That’s nice…”
The more the wine flowed, the less Peter became a central topic of conversation. Soon, Tony morphed into a care-free, Little-free bachelor who did not mind being whisked out into the balmy midnight air to catch a cab back to Stephen’s penthouse.
Four months later, Stephen was sitting in the back of a taxi parked in front of the Midtown Littles Academy. Tony had invited him to join him for the fall pageant where Peter would be performing as a leaf. How that all was supposed to work, Stephen did not have the heart to ask. He could tell Tony was nervous about this first encounter with his Little.
“I’m not sure if it’s too soon,” his eyes would not meet Stephen’s when he broached the subject, “you’re the first person I’ve seriously dated since adopting Peter.” With a sly chuckle he added, “Which is amazing, because after that first night I was ready to write you off as a one-night stand.”
“I’m glad you didn’t,” Stephen told him.
“I’m glad I didn’t either.” They were at the coffee shop inside Metro Hospital; Stephen’s place of work. Sometimes they would meet there for lunch when the doctor’s patient-load would not allow him to leave. “I’ve talked to other caregivers, they think it would be good for Peter to get to know you. Especially if…we’re both serious about this relationship. But…”
And it was that little but, that small moment of hesitation that pushed Stephen to put his hand over Tony’s.
“I am serious about you,” Stephen angled his face to catch Tony’s eyes. “I’m not one for cliches; they’re so fucking insincere. Then again, some cliches…even the cheesiest ones, exist for a reason.” An uncontrollable smile tugged at Stephen’s lips as Tony finally looked up to him, “Tony, you complete me. You’re the missing piece in my life that I didn’t even know I needed. And if Peter’s a part of you, then he’s part of me too.”
Stephen had meant what he said, every word. He wanted Tony; the good, the bad and everything in between. For the first time in his life, Stephen felt like he found someone he could build a future with.
But a future with a Little…
“Hey, sweetie?” The older woman in the driver seat caught Stephen’s attention, “I don’t wanna flip the meter back on, but if you’re just gonna sit here-”
“Oh, yeah, sorry,” Stephen sighed, “how much do I owe you?”
“Nineteen-twelve.”
Stephen had her a twenty and a ten and told her to keep the change.
The October night was cool as felt nice on his freshly trimmed face. In his hands, Stephen held a small bouquet of maroon peonies with baby’s breath. He had thought it an appropriate gift; the sort of thing one brings to a young, aspiring actor. But now at the school, Stephen felt a bit foolish. Peter’s oldest headspace was that of a four-year-old; a preschooler. Would he even want flowers? And what did Littles want? The only thing Stephen had learned from his rotations in a Little’s wing was what they didn’t like: shots, imaging machines, and doctors.
Littles really, really hated doctors…
“Stephen! Hey!”
Stephen was broken from his melancholy musing by Tony’s voice calling out to him. The man was casually dressed in a simple button down and slacks; no tie. What caused Stephen’s heart to drop was the sight of the large, blue-grey diaper bag Tony was hefting over his shoulder. As he drew closer, Stephen could see that it sported the faint pattern of whales, along with the name ‘Peter’ embroidered across the top flap in cherry red script.
Here we go…
“Oh-la-la,” Tony’s eyes went wide at the sight of the flowers, “are these for me?”
“Peter, actually,” Stephen said, “I thought it would be nice, after his performance.”
Tony’s features became soft, his smile slowly melting into a little pout.
“That’s so sweet,” he whispered, “thank you.”
“So, uh,” Stephen looked around, “where is out little Marlon Brando? Hair and make-up?”
“Kinda, sorta,” Tony laughed, “I dropped him off with his teacher. She’s helping them all get their costumes ready.” His boisterous energy waned into a heartfelt: “He’s really excited to meet you, you know.”
“I don’t know why,” Stephen shrugged, “I mean; what did you tell him?”
“I told him that you’re daddy’s friend and that you make daddy very,” Tony took a step closer, “very,” another step, “happy.” He placed a chaste kiss on Stephen’s lips.
“Does he know my name? I mean,” Stephen felt his cheek grow warm. Why was he asking such weird questions? “I mean, when you talk to him, what do you call me?”
“I call you Stephen,” Tony said before barking a small laugh. “But Peter - it’s so cute, I can’t wait for you to hear it – he calls you Stee-ben. I guess that subtle ‘v’ sound is a little too advanced for him.”
Stephen moved to answer, but the school’s intercom let out an ascending chime, letting the caregivers know to come and take their seats.
“Ready?” Tony held out a hand for Stephen.
Stephen took it.
“Ready as I’ll ever be.”
The inside of the school was stifling; the heaters were on high, and the caregivers were packed in tight. Excited voiced echoed off the walls. Stephen felt like he wanted to crawl out of his skin.
Tony, on the other hand, was having the time of his life. Stephen could see in his peripherals that the man was waving and winking at people, even gesturing to Stephen and mouthing a not so subtle “This is him!”.
A man with a stack of programs greeted them at the auditorium entrance, his lean musculature nicely fitting into his navy polo shirt. He smiled brightly at Tony before holding out a program.
“Mr. Stark, I was wondering where you were. I just saw Peter backstage with his class.”
“And how’s my little man doing?” Tony asked.
“Excited, just like they all are,” the man’s dark eyes flitted to Stephen. “I’m sorry, I don’t think we’ve met,” he held out another program for Stephen to take. “Sam Wilson, I’m the phys. ed. director here at Midtown.”
“Doctor Stephen Strange,” Stephen took the offering…and realized that he did know what to say next.
“He’s, uh, my boyfriend,” Tony said with a little bounce on the balls of his feet.
“Oh! You’reStee-ben!” Sam smiled, “Peter has been talking non-stop about you the last few days! I was wondering who you were!”
Stephen felt Tony nudge him with his shoulder.
“Yeah, that’s me, Doctor Stee-ben.”
“Well, go on and enjoy the show,” Sam laughed, “I mean, the little bit you’ll see anyway!”
Along the backwall, a dozen or so caregivers were getting cameras and tripods all set up. One caregiver was arguing with another about their personal lighting being too bright.
“Did you remember to pack a professional production company in that diaper bag?” Stephen asked once they were seated.
“Just my phone,” said Tony, “trust me; I’m not so delusional to think my baby is going to steal the show. But I’m definitely going to record what I can.”
“What’d that Sam guy mean by the ‘little bit we’ll see’? Are we not staying for the whole pageant?”
“Oh, no,” Tony opened his program, “see here? Ms. Romanoff’s class; Grade One? That’s the small Littles.”
“So, Peter’s class; right?”
“Yeah, they’re only going to do these three songs here. It’s about all they can handle,” Tony shrugged, “probably all poor Ms. Romanoff can handle too. Plus, we need to get our little-little guys dinner and bath all before a nine p.m. bedtime.”
“Dinner, huh?” Stephen gave Tony an arch of the eyebrow, “That’s one subject we’ve yet to discuss. I hate to assume it’s going be some fast-food, overly processed, cheap-toy, sticky-floor hellscape, but I feel as though the odds are not in my favor.”
“Until La Boucherie offers an indoor tube slide and a ball pit…”
“Ah, yes,” Stephen felt a genuine shiver of disgust go through him, “ball pits; the bane of every health care provider in the nation. A veritable sea of pink eye and Escherichia Coli.”
Tony certainly had another smart remark, not the Stephen would have minded. Tony’s quick wit was one of the things he adored about him. But the ascending chimes began to play again, and the lights slowly dimmed. The last of the mingling caregivers finally took their seats.
A pleasant woman introduced herself as the school principal and thanks everyone for coming to the first pageant of the year, as well as teased some of the other upcoming events like the holiday market and the dates for winter break.
“Now, let’s go ahead and welcome Ms. Romanoff’s grade one Littles and Mr. Banner’s grade two Littles. They will be singing three songs for us this evening!” She then yielded the stage, clapping her hands and encouraging the audience to do so as well.
Mr. Banner’s grade two came on first, dressed in overalls with bits of hay in the pockets and straw hats on their heads. Stephen gathered that they were meant to be little scarecrows. The group was clearly well versed in their instructions and lined up in predetermined rows. There was only a small bit of fuss as they did so; some giggling, some sighing, some waving to their caregivers.
Then came the chaos.
Grade one stormed the stage in a stampede. There were only eight Littles in total, but Ms. Romanoff was already struggling to herd them into a single-file line. Stephen did notice she only had one free hand to do so, as one sniveling Little boy was tightly gripping her other one. Each Little had been assigned a sweater with an autumnal color; red, orange, yellow or brown. The sweaters were affixed with plastic leaves of corresponding colors.
“Oh, look!” Tony’s phone shot up. “There he is! There’s my baby!”
Stephen took in a deep breath.
It was indeed Peter, dressed in red and with his thumb in his mouth. His large eyes were looking around the stage, taking in the details of the festive decorations. He seemed both lost and hyper focused all at once.
The tune of ‘London Bridge is Falling Down’ began to play on piano. Again, only the grade two seemed to understand what was happening and began to sing a miserably repetitive song:
Autumn leaves are falling down,
Falling down, falling down,
Autumn leaves are falling down,
Down to the ground
Grade one did not seem aware of the fact that they were in a pageant. Stephen mused that dressing the small Littles as leaves was a smart choice, as all they seemed interested in doing was wandering aimlessly across the stage. Peter though did seem like he was attempting a dance. The hand that was not in his mouth was flapping and he was bouncing his knees (somewhat) in time with the music.
Stephen hated that he noticed Peter’s diaper through his corduroy pants. He did not want to let his mind wander back to his rotations in a Little’s wing, he did not want to remember all the crying and screaming and temper tantrums. His short stint there had forever colored his opinion of Littles…and not for the best. Round the clock diapers were fine on invalids. Trying to coax a crying Little with full diaper out from under the table with a Twinkie was a whole other story.
The there was the feeding and the bathing. Getting them up and dressed and then down for naps. It never stopped!
I’m in over my head Stephen closed his eyes Is this what you want? School pageants and fast-food?
“I wish he would take his thumb out of his mouth for two seconds…,” Tony muttered as he tried to angle his phone better, “I just want to see his cute little face.”
“Yeah…,” Stephen said flatly. It did help that Peter was a cute kiddo. And Tony…Tony loved him so much…
Stephen felt a hand go over his.
“You okay?” Tony asked. Stephen nodded but said nothing. “Okay…”
They were silent after that, letting the sounds and music of the pageant fill in the awkward silence.
When the grade one finished cavorting around the stage, Tony stood with a curt ‘Excuse me’ and followed a group of exiting caregivers.
Fuck was all Stephen could think Fuck, fuck, fuck; I’ve fucked this whole thing up.
TBC...