Loki Laufeyson - Gift
Loki Laufeyson - Gift
Warm, humid air blew into my room as I tried to focus on the words of the book Amelie had lent me. Loud shuffling footsteps echoed down the hallway followed by a sharp bang and laughter. Curious, I lowered the book, straining to listen.
Three knocks, offbeat and out-of-synch, came pounding against my door. Warily I made my way over, pulling it open to find Amelie, Peter, and a girl I'd never seen before grinning at me from outside. Amelie held her hand up with one finger raised, a cluster of shopping bags clutched in her grasp. Two bright spots of colour stained her cheeks as if she'd been running; her mouth spread into a smile that started small but quickly bloomed until she was beaming at me happily. She shook the bags lightly as if offering some sort of explanation. I looked from them to her, waiting for her to explain.
“Can we come in?” She grinned at me, clearly excited. Peter was practically bouncing on the spot.
I stood to the side and gestured for them to come in. Like I had in Amelie’s room, I hesitated with the door before again deciding to leave it open. Last thing I wanted was for them to feel like I’d trapped them in my room, despite my telling myself I didn't care.
The young girl looked to be about Peter’s age. She sat down on my bed, crossing her legs underneath her. I tried to ignore her shoes on my bedding and turned to Amelie. “Ms. Amelie, Peter, to what do I owe the pleasure?”
Her smile broke even bigger as she once again held up the shopping bags in her hands. I motioned to take them from her, noticing the lines in her palms from the handles, but she pulled them out of reach. “Nope! It’s a surprise!”
I looked confusedly between her and Peter. “A surprise? For who?” Amelie’s eyes softened as she looked at me, her face unreadable.
“For you Mr Loki! It was Amelie’s idea.” I turned to Peter, truly perplexed now.
“For me? Why?”
Amelie walked past me to place the bags on my bed, tapping the young girls shoes who reluctantly moved her feet to the floor. “I remembered you saying you couldn’t bring anything from Asgard. It’s gotta be hard enough moving in with us lot, I wanted to make sure you had at least one space that feels like home.”
I blinked at Amelie’s statement, rendered speechless. Peter moved the desk chair so that it was facing the bed and patted it excitedly. “Sit down Mr Loki, sir! We’ll show you what we got! Oh and this is MJ by the way.”
MJ nodded at me, seemingly completely at ease. I nodded in response before moving to the chair Peter gestured to.
Amelie pulled one of the bags onto her lap, the paper crinkling loudly while she rummaged through it, trying to decide what to reveal first. I stared at her, feeling like a child on their birthday morning, scared that something would go wrong but too excited to wait for the moment to pass. The memory of gifts received on my earliest birthdays was hazy and soft around the edges, but there was a pleasing fatigue from thinking about it.
Amelie pulled a brown box from the bag and handed it to me with a flourish. “This one first.”
She gave me an encouraging smile as I lifted the box and ran my fingers over its smooth surface. It felt heavier than I thought it would, and I sat staring at it for a few moments, trying to remember the last time I had received a gift. As much as I'd spent my time saying that the Midgardians should have spent their time devoted to me, it had never actually happened. I carefully unfolded the top of the box and tipped out what was inside.
A dainty glass teapot slid into my hand, big enough for a single serving, with a strainer integrated into it. I stroked the glass, feeling the cold on my fingers. For a moment all I could do was stare at it, before Amelie leaned forward excitedly. “Do you like it? Now you can brew proper herbal teas in your room, instead of using the tea bags in the kitchen!”
I cleared my throat, refusing to acknowledge the small lump forming in it, as I looked her in the eye and smiled softly. “It is wonderful. Thank you.”
At this, Amelie’s smile widened before she reached into the shopping bag again. I carefully put the teapot back in its box so as not to break it, and leant backwards to put it onto my desk.
As I turned back, several smaller boxes were thrust into my arms. The smell of herbs and citrus fruits hit me immediately and I studied the pretty tins of tea individually.
Peter’s eyes shone with barely contained excitement, practically vibrating with anticipation. “Can I chose the next one?” he asked eagerly.
Amelie laughed, extending the bag toward him as Peter plunged his hand inside, rifling through the contents before snatching up a large, white box. He thrust it at me with an infectious grin, almost throwing it as Amelie deftly plucked the tea boxes from my lap. I couldn't help but laugh as I began to open it.
It was an electric kettle.
“Now you can boil water in your room!” Peter bounced up and down again, thrilled.
I looked at Amelie who winked. “And no more microwaved water.”
I laughed again, feeling giddy as Peter took the kettle from me to find a home for it in my room.
The gifts continued as Amelie and Peter took turns pulling items from the shopping bags. They included blankets, cushions, teacups, and stationary, all in deep muted colours that I liked very much.
Finally, Amelie pulled the last item from the bags and handed it to me. I took the rectangular box and studied it. Inside, I found a small, black tablet, extremely lightweight and with a smooth, matt screen. I looked to Amelie, puzzled.
“It’s a Kindle.” She explained. “Nothing beats the feeling of real books, but until we get you set up with a library this will be a good way to still read as much as possible.”
I stared at the Kindle, stroking the screen softly. “I can read on this?”
She nodded quickly. “It’s pre-set with my account so you’ll have access to hundreds of books already. Then you can always download more.”
I looked down at the little tablet again, feeling unable to speak. Amelie watched me quietly.
Peter came round and plopped down on the bed next to her. “Do you like it Mr Loki, sir?”
Unable to form any words, I simply nodded my head in response, afraid my voice would betray me.
MJ stood and stretched, her shoulders cracking as she did so before she turned to Peter. “This was fun, but we have to go. We have to be back at his aunt’s by 4pm or he’ll be in trouble.”
Peter grimaced. “May’s an amazing lady, but not one you want to get on the wrong side of.” He stood with MJ and grinned at me. “I hope you feel more at home here now Mr Loki, we’re glad you’re here.” With that, he and MJ left the room, closing the door behind them.
Amelie stayed sat on my bed as she watched me. I cleared my throat to find my voice, worried she’d think I was being ungrateful. “I was not expecting anything like this, you should not have gone to so much trouble on my account.”
She smiled softly tilting her head to one side. “It was no trouble, we enjoyed ourselves. Peter’s very taken with you.”
I laughed quietly. “His enthusiasm is infectious, it seems.”
Amelie laughed as she looked away, reminiscing. “He’s a great friend.” Pushing herself off the bed, she went to the new pile of boxes haphazardly placed on my desk, opening them to take out their contents. I stood from my chair, placing the kindle on my bedside before walking round to join her. “Let’s get you set up, hm?” She smiled as she continued, flattening the empty boxes as she went.
“You’ve done more than enough Ms Amelie, no need to go to anymore trouble.”
“It’s no bother, I like arranging things. Plus it’ll be quicker if I help you.”
In a comfortable silence, we both removed my gifts from their packaging, piling the rubbish on the bed. Amelie took the new cushions and placed one on my desk chair, and the rest she propped up in front of my pillows. The new blanket was folded on the end of my bed, and all of the stationary went away in my desk. Amelie set up the kettle on top of my chest of drawers, removing it from the cupboard Peter had put it in, with the teas neatly arranged on a wall shelf above. I turned to watch her as she spun the tins to face forward on the shelf. I leaned against my desk with my arms folded.
“Why did you do this?”
“It wasn’t just me, Peter and MJ picked things out too.”
“But it was your idea.”
She turned to me, her face thoughtful. “It was something Peter said while we were out. I’ve been trying to make sure that you feel welcome, but I realised it would take a long time for this tower to feel like home. I thought that having your own things around you would help you feel like this is your space. Somewhere you can be safe.”
She turned and boiled the kettle, using the water to clean the new teapot and teacups as I watched her in awe, unable to find words to express my gratitude for her unwavering hospitality. I’d never known anyone to be so caring about someone else before. She didn’t just think about my comfort; her every action was focused on making sure I felt as welcome as possible in her home.
The home that I had so nearly destroyed years ago.
I felt the tightness in my throat as the familiar feeling of guilt bubbled up inside of me. I bit my lip, digging my nails into soft skin of my arm and leaving deep crescents behind. My remorse was palpable, the lives of those I'd wronged swam through my mind, an invisible deck on which imperceptible reflections of faces flashed at me and were gone. The urge to tell Amelie everything, the truth about who I really was, was overwhelming me. She had given me so much already, would she take it back once she discovered the monster that lay beneath? I was certain she would never talk to me again, but she deserved to know who she was trying to befriend. It wasn’t fair to her to keep pretending that the world thought any differently about me than what they truly did. I felt like a monster, waiting beneath the surface ready to burst out.
“Ms Amelie…”
She turned to me, alarmed by the tone of my voice.
“You shouldn’t be doing all this for me. I don’t even deserve to be here.”
Amelie frowned at my statement, about to argue, but I continued.
“I don’t know how much Tony has told you about me, or what you may have seen in the news, but I’m certain you do not know everything… I’m a monster, Ms Amelie. I’ve killed hundreds of people, nearly destroyed this city, I even betrayed my brother when he needed me most. I don’t deserve the second chance that he and your uncle have offered me, and I certainly don’t deserve your friendship. I tried to kill the Avengers - your family. You’ve already been more caring and thoughtful than any Midgardian I’ve ever met, but I can’t let you think I’m not as bad as I am. I’m the villain in this city’s stories and you need to know that.”
I finished my confession and turned to face the window as I waited for Amelie’s reaction. I expected her to shout or throw something, maybe even just storm out, but it was silent. After a few moments, I heard her soft footsteps approach me and I turned to face her. Her eyes were watery as she looked up at me, this was worse than her being angry. I braced myself for whatever was coming.
I was not ready when she threw her arms around my neck and gave me the tightest embrace I’d ever had.
I stood still, my hands in the air, too shocked to move. She held on before murmuring into my shoulder “I know who you are Loki, I know what happened in the past, and I’ve decided to befriend you despite that knowledge. Please don’t think it’d be any different if I didn’t know.”
I felt a lump rise in my throat as I lowered my hands to her back, cautiously returning her embrace. My eyes were wet as she pulled away and I wiped at them slightly. “You knew?”
Amelie smiled sadly at me. “I don’t think you’d be here if you didn’t want a different life. Everyone has a past, the Avengers included. Why would you be less capable and deserving of change?”
I shook my head. “I expected you to throw something at me.”
She laughed brightly, the sound ringing in my room that no longer looked like a hotel suite. Now that I had more possessions, I noticed the room didn’t echo like it had before.
Amelie wiped her eyes as she smiled at me. I returned her smile with one of my own, feeling much lighter than I had in a long time.