Freedom is Sweet

James smiles to himself as he heads down the hall back towards his room. It’s been a week since Natalia and Steve’s little break in, and the hallway to the elevator almost doesn’t carry the memory anymore. Or rather, the memory of that night, all that fucking fear, Tony’s concern, the mess he almost made it, is being completely overshadowed by all the other things that have happened since then.

After the conversation with Tony in the garden, James had spent the rest of the day thinking about his words. And amongst everything, amongst the relief that he’d been right in his gamble, through the warm feeling Tony’s words had left in him, through the burning sensation of Tony’s hand squeezing his, James had focused on one thing: 

He needs allies. Well, that’s how the Winter Solider in him had phrased it. But no matter how much Friday explains the therapy terminology to him, the psychology behind the idea, it boils down to that. 

Right now he’s stuck. He has either Steve or now Tony to rely on, the only two people he really knows this side of hell. Or rather, the only two people who are invested in his life. A setup that is unfair both to them, and to him, as Friday keeps pointing out. If he wants to take this second chance he has been given, take control over his life, he needs to set up a wider base.

In retrospect James realises that that is what Steve had been trying to do back in Wakanda, forcing James to spend time with his little renegade team there. He also understands why that hadn’t really taken root. He’d been too raw then, barely at home in his body, let alone able to extend anything of him outwards.

But now, courtesy of Tony, there are other things he can think about other than just pain and instinct. So James has been going around, trying to meet the rest of Tony’s family. His team. Some of the less busy staff of the compound. An idea that sounded terrible when Friday first proposed it, but after some initial mortifying clumsiness, it had actually been fun. Talking to all of these extraordinary people had put his own life into perspective a little. Sure, he may be fucked up six ways to Sunday, but here amongst androids and wizards and genius engineers, he didn’t stand out as much.

And in combination with a business trip that had taken Tony to Europe, leaving James to fend for himself for a few days, he has been making excellent progress in his little mission.

“Friday?” he asks once he’s back in his room.

“Yes, James?” 

“Correct me if your readings say something else, but I think you can mark Operation Arachnid a success.”

Friday chuckles, something James has learned recently she can even do. 

“Your intuition is rather uncanny, I must admit. Indeed, I think you may count Spider-man as your friend at this point.” She brings up the list James had established last week, a list that had at first seemed horribly daunting, including most of the New Avengers and several other of the more permanent fixtures in the compound. But at this point, a week later, all of the faces are graced with a blue checkmark, indicating that James had managed to make his introductions to them, and a good half of the list sported an additional green checkmark, signalling a more lengthy conversation. 

James watches almost giddily as Friday sets one of the few coveted pink checkmarks beside the picture of Spider-man, indicating documented intent to spend more time together in the future. Or ‘friendship’ as Friday defined it. She is able to measure the physical indicators as proof, but James just has his intuition and observational skills to rely on.

He looks over the other pictures on the list carrying a pink checkmark with pride. There are Tony and Friday of course, initially put there when Friday had explained the colour coding system to him and then never removed to make the list seem less daunting. Friday had chosen a picture of Iron Man as her own picture, a joke just between the two of them. 

The next addition had been Peter Parker, one of the two kids that haunt the compound almost every week. James had realised quickly why Tony had all but adopted the boy, he was brilliant and seemingly vibrated with energy every time James ran into him. Their conversations tended to revolve around James’ homework list of movies and books to catch up on, and at this point James is convinced Peter has invested more time into figuring out the exact nuances of his taste in stories than James.

Other additions on the list were Vision, Dr. Banner, and a faded mark on the picture of Colonel Rhodes. James wasn’t so sure about that one, but Friday insisted that the Colonel liked him ever since he had asked Friday to call Rhodes one night when he wasn’t sure whether it would be okay to carry an exhausted Tony into his room, calling Rhodes instead.

“The Vision has asked me to inquire whether you would be open to a conversation. They are headed this way,” Friday informs him, and James makes the gesture that will dismiss the list. He doesn’t need anyone else to know that he has been following Tony’s advice like this. While James knows Tony will be ecstatic about his progress once he comes back, he’s much less confident whether him approaching it like a mission will be appreciated.

“Of course, yeah.”

A few moments later, Vision drifts through the door of James’ room. It’s what they had originally bonded over, this shared feeling that the world they are inhabiting is just a little alien. Trying to adjust, trying to live while everything is governed by invisible rules that are only ever discovered by another person’s disapproval. The three of them, James, Vision, and Friday had formed a chat where they shared new strange incongruencies with each other whenever they encountered one, along with the apparent correct approach.

“Good afternoon, Mr. Barnes. I hope I am not interrupting.”

James lets himself fall into the chair at his desk, both to get comfortable and to hide the scattered papers that hold records of his most recent memories and nightmares from view. It’s becoming easier to acknowledge these dichotomies in his thoughts, just accepting that he’s always going to have several motives for any one action. Trying to accept that the Soldier’s vigilance isn’t something he is going to be hurt for the way he used to be punished for even the most fleeting glimpses of Bucky Barnes’ humanity.

“No, I was just talking to Friday. Anything I can help you with? Is it our turn with dinner again?”

James knows it’s not, but it’s a pattern he has picked up from Pepper Potts, asking a question he knows the answer to, offering his conversation partner a chance to correct him, to feel in control of the conversation. It’s been one of the habits that looks like it might stick.

“No, I believe Dr. Banner is due the honours tonight. No, it is rather the reverse. I have a proposal that I hoped might aid you.”

James tenses. “Oh?”

“With your and Mr. Stark’s permission I have been doing some research together with Dr. Strange into Ms. Maximoffs capabilities. We have some previous occurrences to work with of course, but your case has been proven to be unique.”

James scoffs. “Well, I guess it’s good to know that there aren’t any other people she has fucked with like this.”

“A comfort in a frustrating situation, yes. But despite this hurdle I think I may have made some significant progress. A way to lift the spell, for lack of a better word.”

Lack of better words has been the throughline in this whole situation. Tony brings it up every time they try to work on it, trying to figure out the parameters of what they can only really call an enchantment. Tony hates it, a true man of science, and James has been enjoying watching Tony vent his frustrations at an exasperated Dr. Strange. While the area of Dr. Strange’s power is well beyond James and drives a justified chill down his spine whenever he comes near it, James can recognise the wizard’s intelligence and expertise as much as he can recognise Tony’s. A courtesy both of them refuse to extend to the other.

“I thought the spell was lifted when Tony kidnapped me?”

“Not quite.” Vision makes a gesture with their hand and Friday brings up a hologram of New York, the Stark Tower dyed a contrasting orange to the blue of Manhattan, surrounded by a ring of orange at a radius of what James knows instinctively is just over a mile.

“Our hypothesis currently is that Ms. Maximoff’s enchantment was placed on you sometime in Wakanda, but that Captain Rogers is the inciting point, if you will.”

“I’m cursed, and Steve triggers it.”

“Well put. However, it is an enduring enchantment, so Ms. Maximoff needs to be in range and she must sustain the magic actively. This is evidenced by your continued being yourself despite being in close contact with the Captain earlier this month. We can assume that Ms. Maximoff did not come along with them and was thus out of range to reinstate her control over you, despite your proximity to Steve.”

James nods, rubbing his hand over his face. “Yeah, so far so complicated.”

Vision smiles then, patient with James’ sarcasm as always. “Magic is a strange beast. I admit I also cannot resist the desire to find a more efficient way to achieve the intended effect, Dr. Strange has been inclined towards the same line of thought. But even he had to admit that this is a rather complex feat, and Ms. Maximoff has done impressive work give her amateur status.”

“Impressive work, right,” James says with a laugh, but he has to agree. As annoying as the fucking fear is, as terrifying as it is not to know what is going on with him, what his body is doing without his permission, when he looks at it from above the witch’s enchantment is horrifyingly cruelly clever.

“In the way a hydrogen bomb is impressive, but impressive nonetheless.”

“Hey, Tony isn’t here to shout at me. I agree. It’s pretty fucked up, but I can see how in the wrong hand, this would be so much worse.”

“It is injuring one of my friends, Mr. Barnes. It is already in the wrong hands.”

James offers Vision a small smile. “You said you had an idea.”

“Yes, well. Dr. Strange and I have been able to trace Ms. Maximoff’s magic back to it’s source. A source that is a sibling so to speak to my own autonomy.” They gesture at the golden stone embedded in their forehead. “We think we may be able to unwork the enchantment, with some time and patience.”

James’ heart races then. He might be free of this, one less person with control over him.

“Okay. What does Tony think of this?”

“I haven’t told him yet.”

“Right, I keep forgetting that he’s in Europe right now,” James lies. Like he could forget. But it is true that he has been trying not to bother Tony while he is away, allowing the other man to focus on his work, and trying to prove to himself that he doesn’t need Tony here to function. Doesn’t mean he doesn’t miss him though.

Vision smiles their cryptic smile. “I haven’t told Mr. Stark because I wished to discuss this with you first. It is your mind and your body we are discussing, James. Mr. Stark’s opinion, while valuable, holds no sway over this.”

James blinks. “What?”

“You should decide what you think of the idea first, James.”

Vision waits with endless patience while James stares at him, then at the floor, trying to get used to this idea.

“Uhm– I’m not sure if that’s smart. I know nothing about this.”

“I would disagree. You are the one living with Ms. Maximoff’s work, I would say you know most intimately about this.”

James shakes his head, his mind racing to understand the sinking feeling in his gut. “Not like you or Dr. Strange do. Not like Tony does. I just– I’m just scared.”

“Again, I must disagree, you give yourself too little credit, James. Could you perhaps explain to me why you are hesitant to form an initial opinion without outside influence?”

Hitting the nail on the head with machine like accuracy, as always. James sighs, rubbing his hand over his face and running it through his hair.

“People here are so kind to me. With just everything. And I know Tony gets upset when I… when I can’t extend that sort of kindness to myself.” He hazards a glance up at Vision. “I don’t want to disappoint my friends already.”

Minute shifts in emotion filter over Vision’s face, too fast for James to completely decode.

“You will never run the risk of doing so by expressing your opinion, James.”

“I’m not sure…”

“Do my the favour of trying.”

James swallows, focusing on keeping his hand relaxed, rather than digging into his leg the way he wants to. “If I never have to have another person fucking with my mind it will be a few decades too late, but if I have to choose between you and the witch, I’d rather it be you. Tony trusts you and Dr. Strange, and that has to mean something, but if I said I trusted you with this, it’d be a lie.”

Vision nods, something like pride on their face. “Thank you. We don’t have to try it, if you’re not comfortable. I understand your hesitations, and your autonomy and choice has my utmost respect.”

James smiles and he can feel himself turning cruel, a cold settling over his heart that has been put there by others, but is now all his own. “No, I want to try it. I’m scared, I don’t want you in my head or anyone else, but we’ll do it. I’ve been through worse shit than this, I doubt you and the wizard can fuck me up any worse than already is. And if you do, if the programming comes back or I end up hurting someone, the offer I came here with still stands.”

“James–”

“This is what I mean. I understand what this is, my hesitation is a boundary and you’re all respecting it. I can’t do the same though, not all the time. Sometimes I think of how Tony or Peter would look at me if they heard me talk, but most of the time still…”

“Most of the time it is easier to operate within the boundaries set for you by your captors.”

James nods. Nails and machine precision, right through to the worst part of him. “You can’t say they didn’t know what they were doing,” he whispers, admitting the worst of him. And Vision doesn’t argue, doesn’t immediately refute him like James knows most humans in this compound would. Instead they look at him and think, actually considering whether what James is saying is the truth.

“I am unsure whether your assessment is correct.” This is why James loves talking to Vision. “Your record with Hydra is unmatched, but given all I know of loyalty and love, I cannot help but wonder what kind of assassin they could have crafted with tools like those.”

“I don’t think they put a lot of stock in love. Loyalty maybe.”

“No, I think not. But consider Captain Rogers as an example. The lengths to which he went for you are perhaps not representative, but given Hydra’s comfort with all manner of manipulation, I would imagine it possible to construct a similar sort of bond.”

“Sounds cruel.”

“Deeply unethical, yes. But I do believe such ties would rival the forceful hold Hydra was exerting.”

James sighs. “I guess it did, yeah.”

“I understand what you mean though. It is rather difficult to listen to you speak of yourself in such a dehumanising fashion, I understand why you might hesitate to do so in front of the people that value you.”

“Sorry,” James whispers, regretting that he even opened his mouth.

“No, please. Just because I may not like hearing it does not mean you should not phrase your thoughts or share them with me, especially since I asked you to do so.”

“I get that they’re wrong, if that helps,” James explains with a sigh. “It’s why what I think doesn’t matter much, I know it’s fucked. I trust Tony, I trust you to be kind if nothing else. Not sure I deserve it, but I’m not gonna fight it.”

“It’s your opinion, James, it cannot be wrong, at least not in this regard. And I still believe your opinion paramount to anyone else’s in this issue. But if your are open to it, I would like to offer my own thoughts as a balance to your own.”

“Of course.”

“The hypothesis Dr. Strange and I are operating on is based on all the data you and Mr. Stark have provided us. We’re not entirely sure how this enchantment will react to our own powers, but between myself and the sorcerer supreme, we believe we can adjust to whatever we encounter. This is not a guarantee that nothing will go wrong of course. Ms. Maximoff’s enchantment may have protections in place, it may lash out, it may cause damage. And there is of course the subject of your memories. They may return, or they may stay lost.”

“Not sure what’s the worst case there, to be honest,” James murmurs and Vision sighs.

“One does have to wonder what happened that even the Winter Soldier fears it, yes.” 

It’s the question that hasn’t been leaving his mind, ever since Tony properly explained the panic attacks to him. Your body fears something you can’t remember. Try to learn the triggers and save your body the stress. It’s a short list, really. Touch. Certain intonations. Steve.

“Thank you.”

“This is up to you, James. I wish to see you free of this, but not at any cost. Consider this carefully.”

James nods, trying for a smile. “I will. I promise I’ll try.”

Vision rises, a pleased smile on their face as they turn towards the door. “That’s all I ask, my friend.” They hesitate at the door, their eyes growing a little distant as their awareness shifts, suddenly looking more machine than man. “Mr. Stark has returned. I am sure he’d like to see you.”

***

They’re sitting in the workshop, and at this point neither of them know for whose comfort they are here. Tony insists it’s the best place to be in the compound. James glances to the man beside him and is inclined to agree.

“How was the trip?”

Tony scoffs, taking a sip of his coffee. “You don’t want to hear about the trip, believe me.”

“If you say so.”

“Boy do I. But tell me about you, how was your week? Friday has been keeping me in the dark, something about a top secret mission.”

James chuckles. “Sure, yeah, something like that. Can I get you another cup?”

He takes Tony’s cup without waiting for an answer, using the moment as an excuse to brush his fingers against Tony’s. His heart seizes unpleasantly a the contact, but Tony’s smile makes so much more than up for it.

“Maybe I should be gone for this long a little more often if this is the kind of pampering I can expect when I get back. And yes of course I want another coffee, what a question is that even?”

James smiles, the domesticity of the moment almost painful, and dodges Dummy and U to get to the counter. He fills Tony’s cup and pinches a bottle of water for himself between his arm and his chest before he heads back to the couch Tony had dragged him to the minute James had found him in the kitchen.

“Yeah, I’ve been following your advice. Trying to make friends.”

James watches carefully as Tony’s whole face shifts with joy, a wide beaming smile lighting up his features.

“And? How did it go? Who did you talk to, did you finally talk to Peter? He’s been dying to meet you, it’s been one hell of a hassle to keep him off your back, let me tell you.” Tony’s words spill out of him like water, and for a moment James just lets himself soak all of it in. The nervousness from touching Tony just now has almost settled again, and he’s learned that if he lets these spikes settle they don’t build up as much. Then he can push himself to do it again soon.

“Friday? You can share the list.”

“List?”

“But James, that’s a highly sensitive document!” Friday protests with mock affront. Tony’s eyebrow arches even higher and James is failing to contain his laughter.

“Tony has earned the clearance, I’d say.”

Tony scoffs. “I see how it is, conspiring with my own AI against me. I think I’m going to regret introducing you two.”

“I have no idea what you mean, Boss. Clearance issued. You now have access to… The List.”

James puts down Tony’s coffee cup on the table by the couch before he spills something with how hard he’s shaking with laughter, letting the water bottle fall into his hand.

With a sparkle in his eyes Tony looks over at James. “So, what’s this about?”

James regains control over himself, the nerves helping a good bit. Friday has assured him again and again that this isn’t anything bad, but still. HIs heart beats in his throat as he makes the gesture to open the list. He considers explaining, but Tony’s eyes flit over the hologram and James know he’ll understand it well enough on his own.

“Made it easier, approaching it like a mission in a way. Less overwhelming,” he mumbles, keeping his eyes down on his hands. He can take disappointment from Steve and from most other people, but as he offers up his most glaring fault, he finds that he cannot take it from Tony.

Because nobody wants the Winter Soldier in their house. James understands well enough that his being welcome anywhere is contingent on keeping that part of him in check, not letting show that the Winter Soldier isn’t called into existence by a few russian phrases. The Winter Soldier is in his bones and blood, years of reflexes and instincts and training that won’t leave as easy as the conditioning may have. The conditioning was always just there to control, to make sure the weapon was aimed in the right directions. The weapon part is all James though, always will be.

So he structures friendships like missions, keeps lists and gives mission reports to his handler, because it makes things make sense. It’s grotesque and–

“Clever.” 

James jerks up, but Tony is still engrossed in the list.

“What’s pink mean?”

“Uhm, documented desire for future time together,” James tries to explain, taking in Tony’s expression. BUt there is no disgust there, no fear. Not even disapproval. No, if anything Tony just seems.

“Wow, I’m so proud of you, James! Looks like you’ve been quite the chatterbox since I’ve been away, this is so much progress. I’m impressed.”

“Really?”

Tony rolls his eyes. “Of course. And don’t think I’m not flattered that you’ve included me and Friday. I’m really glad you’ve gotten this far all by yourself, it’s great! And now I get to say I told you.”

James grins to cover up the ache in his chest. “Oh? And what about?”

“Told you that once everyone else got to meet you they’d love you. Just sorry I wasn’t there to see Peter’s face, he must have been over the moon.”

“Oh, he was. I’m sure Friday made a recording for you.”

“I did, Boss.”

But Tony waves it off. “Nah, I’m sure I’ll get to hear all about it as soon as I show my face upstairs again.”

James plays with the bottle, channelling his nerves into following the cool ridges in the plastic.

“I wanted to do it on my own,” he confesses, keeping his gaze on his hand. “I’m so glad I have you and Friday, you’re like my backbone right now, home base in a way. But I don’t want to have to rely on you all the time, that’s not fair to you guys.”

“Or you, James,” Friday chimes in gently, and James nods distractedly.

“Yeah, course,” he murmurs, focusing most of his energy standing his ground, on not apologising. He didn’t do anything wrong. This was a good move, he did nothing wrong. Sure, he doesn’t want to disappoint Tony, but even if he did, that would be alright.

He gets torn out of his thoughts when Tony reaches out to him, his whole body tensing pre-emptively to prepare him for the fear. But Tony doesn’t touch him, simply takes the water bottle out of his hand and opening it for him before handing it back.

“I’m glad to hear that, James.”

“You are?” The gentle assuring tone of Tony’s voice gets James to look up with surprise. Tony meets his gaze with warm brown eyes and a smile that makes James wonder what it might feel like to kiss that smile.

“Of course. I’m glad you can find some kind of safety with Friday and me, but you deserve so much more than two people in your corner, snowflake. The New Avengers are good people, and you deserve more good people around you. As much as I want to, trust me, don’t let me hog all of your time.”

James nods and takes a few deep gulps from the bottle to process those words, to adjust to the genuine joy at his progress radiating from Tony.

“I, uhm– did Vision already talk to you?”

Tony’s brows furrow. “In general? Not since I came back, you found me first after my cunning escape to the coffee machine. Why?”

Another new kindness to slot into this new web of people forming around him. James trusts Vision, had believed them when they said they had come to him first, but somehow James had still expected Tony to have received some kind of heads up about this. It’s strange that this is up to him now. The choice whether to involve Tony, who to involve with this at all.

“They and Dr. Strange think they know how to get the enchantment off me.”

Tony pulls a face at the word, just as James knew he would. It’s why he never cushions his word choices whenever he talks about magic, just to see Tony’s antics.

“They said it’s not a guarantee, but it honestly sounds like a pretty good shot.”

Tony takes a sip of his coffee, listening to James relay the explanation Vision had given him.

“I hate desecrating the holy ground with talks of magic,” Tony says and gives a theatrical shudder at the word. “What do you want to do?”

James sighs and rubs his hand over his face. “Vision asked me the same thing.”

“Yeah, as they should. It’s your choice to make, snowstorm.”

“I know.” James stalls for a moment, holding the bottle carefully between his thighs and screwing the bottle cap back on. “It doesn’t feel like much of a choice, if that makes sense?”

Tony nods. “I get what you mean. I think the choice we’re asking you to make is whether you’re comfortable going for it already, or if you want to stall until Vision and Strange have more assurances. The more time you give them, the more they can study Maximoff’s work. You could give it another week, fuck it, a few months if you wanted to.”

James looks over at Tony, reclining against the couch with one arm draped over the backrest. He looks stunning like this, still dressed in his business suit with a deep blue tie hanging loose around his neck, the cuffs and first button of his shirt undone, taking the edges off his attire. He looks beautiful and powerful, and when Tony looks at him then, the truth slips past him so easily.

“I don’t want to wait a few months.”

Tony smiles, an almost predatory languid thing that sends heat shooting straight to James’ stomach.

“Flattering,” Tony purrs, his voice golden and soft. “But this isn’t a decision to make with your dick, love.”

James laughs, breaking out of the spell Tony has over him and shaking his head. “I’m not, trust me. As much as I want to know what it’d be like to touch you without feeling sick from it, I am more scared than anything else. I just figured, what’s the worst that can happen?”

“It’s magic, James, there is quite a lot of worst that could happen,” Tony remarks deadpan.

“I get that. But really, going through it. Worst that could happen is that the enchantment snaps back. I’m back to floating, barely conscious while my body acts out good ol’ Bucky Barnes. Steve will be over the moon and off your back. Or maybe you break me out of it again. You’ve done it once, you can do it again.”

Tony opens his mouth to protest, but now that he’s started, James keeps talking, nights of imagining the worst all to himself finally spilling out.

“Maybe it traps me in my nightmares again while I’m trapped. Okay. I have nightmares of memories, my brain can’t really come up with worse shit than that. And I went through all that once already and came out alive on the other end. I can survive that again.”

“But you don’t have to, James. You shouldn’t have to. You never should have gone through this in the first place,” Tony interjects, his tone pleading with James to stop.

“No, Vision explained it to me. From what I understand they’re pretty confident that as long as I’m here and Steve and the witch are somewhere else, they can get it out of me. And then what’s the worst that could happen?”

“You could remember,” Tony whispers, and James tenses.

“I always thought that was the goal? For me to remember. Be able to share the intel of what happened.”

But Tony groans, his head dropping back against the couch as his eyes screw shut. “No, James, please. I… You’re not a resource. You’re not a tool to us, to me.” His eyes fly open and land on James with a weight and sincerity he isn’t sure he can bear. “You’re my friend, James. Fuck, probably more at this point. The goal here is for you to be free, to live happily, whatever that looks like.”

James nods, letting the words wash over him, past his immediate defences that no, he’s not worth this, if he isn’t useful then what is he.

“I’m sorry.”

“It’s alright,” Tony sighs, looking so tired.

“No, it’s not. I need to be more careful what I say. Vision doesn’t show it, but I know he also gets upset. Hell, even Friday.”

“It’s just painful to hear you talk about yourself like that,” Tony admits quietly to his coffee cup. “You’re such a good person, you’re amazing, and it kind of hurts that you can’t see that.”

“I’m sorry,” James whispers again, because there’s nothing else he can do.

“No, don’t be. It’s not your fault.” 

“I don’t know how to stop it. I’m always worried I have nothing else to offer.” 

“Your being welcome here, fuck, our friendship isn’t contingent on you being useful, James. If anything, it’s contingent on you being yourself.” 

James scoffs. “Whatever that means.”

“Whatever that means,” Tony agrees completely earnestly.

James smiles to himself, watching as Tony rearranges himself on the couch, becoming a human pretzel holding a coffee cup.

“What happens if I remember?” James asks quietly.

Tony hums and twists his cup. “I don’t know, to be honest. You’ll be safe, between Vision, Strange and me, you’ll be safe. And then we’ll take it one step at a time.”

James nods. “And I can stay here?” he asks nonchalantly, looking out into the workshop while he asks the question he’s been dreading most of all.

“Of course, yeah. You can stay in the compound until you decide differently, snowflake. Now or otherwise too.” 

“No, I know that. But, like… with you. Can I come here still? Would you want that?”

Tony smiles, tapping the tip of his loafer against James’ sneaker. “What I want doesn’t matter.”

“I know,” James whispers, his voice crawling further down his chest. “But it matters to me.”

Tony turns towards him fully, drawing his leg back towards himself so as not to risk touching James. He curls up around his coffee cup and looks at James, all the sharpness of his business outfit fading away under the comfort of the moment.

“Well, in case I haven’t been clear enough,” Tony starts softly, “I would love if you stayed here. You’re a delight and my friend. I like spending time with you, and I don’t want to stop.”

James cannot help his smile then, cannot help the blush rising to his cheeks. Tony sees it too, his smile growing fond, and James has to look away then or do something stupid.

“So when do we do this?”

“Whenever you’re ready, snowstorm.”

James scoffs. “I won’t ever be ready to let someone fuck with my head, even if it is to unfuck it.”

“Fair,” Tony concedes.

“Can we do it tonight?”

Tony blinks. “You sure?”

James forces a smile. “It’s not getting better than this.”

“Guess I’ll call Strange then,” Tony says with a grin, pulling out his phone.