Dumb, Wicked, and White
Often times Jessica is awoken at late hours of night by Miguel alerting her of a mission. In fact she spends more nights out catching anomalies then she does sleeping. Which is not recommended for a pregnant woman but girl power. Its not like that reslly matters as most of that is made up on slow afternoons
But on nights like these she is quick to jump into action her uniform in mere seconds, no doubt because of the years of practice of being Spider-woman, and she's off to Miguel's call.
Unlike the occasion Jessics is very much not used to seeing Miguel in such a state after an alert. He's also not used to it just being the two of them for one of these meetings. She has half a mind to think he's going to fire her but the look in his face is comical enough that she doubts that's.
So they sit down at the table and Miguel is there quietly gawking over a problem she had yet to be informed of.
"You wanna tell me why im here?"
The dialogue comes easy for her but Miguel still struggles a bit.
Which was not at all shocking he'd never been good at words but right now it was more irritating to Jessica than it was entertaining.
"Listen if you dragged me out of here to watch you look stupid, this could've waited until the morning."
She stands and begins to walk away, she swears that man is losing his mind more and more each day and she doesn't have the appliance or tune to take care of two babies.
She's almost at the door and Miguel has half a mind to let her leave and forget that the reason he brought her here was because he needs help. He doesn't do any of that tough.
His plea burns his throat and falls off his tongue faster than he cared for it to.
"I need you hel- advice." Miguel admits head downturn.
Jessica snaps back to look at him and for a second she doesn't believe him. How could she? Miguel was nothing short of some sort of bio-engineered freak with an insane work ethic.
"You. Miguel O' Hara meed, my, help?" She teases him her arms crossed.
"Advice." He corrects but she doesn't care.
At least not for too long, because when she does care, she notices the tense corners of his lips and the sound of his tapping foot against the linoleum, a material she voted against.
Jessica sits down the smile that was playing at her lips slowly dropping. Shes not used to seeing him like this. Miguel's upset and since Jessica is somewhat of an empath she's upset, and she doesn't care for that so she's quick to distract herself with the wrinkles and crows feet that are above and around Miguel's obvious cues of distress.
After her pretty effective distraction Jessica leans back in her seat wondering what Miguel could've done now. The last time he asked her for help like this he had asked her to help pick out a thank you gift for the spiderpeople that built the giant training facility.
He had figured a thank you card and a couple months off would compensate for their labor. How they didn't unionize was beyond Jessica but she would never say it.
"Whats going on?" It's an invitation to talk about both the reason for this meeting and whatever is causing that haggard expression. Miguel of course only recognizes the first one.
"I have this friend." Miguel starts and his tone tells her that this friend is a bit more than that.
"You have friends?" Lyla pops up and Miguel sighs.
"Can you not say things like that? I'm trying to have a serious conversation here and you just keep psyching me out here." Miguel pouts.
"So you have a friend?" Jessica ask trying to get them back on track.
"Yes!" Miguel says and nods saying nothing else.
Jessica nods as well motioning him to continue, her hands cycling each other.
"And, I like them." He finishes.
Jessica looks at him. She knows what he means but whats the point of being here of she didn't poke a bit of fun at him.
"I too like my friends Miguel, that's why they're my friends."
"No, like, like like them."
If you'd have ask Jessica the biggest marvel of her carrer as Spiderwoman seconds ago, she probably would've said her kid. If you ask her now, she'll still tell you exactly that, but she'd be damned if Miguel coming to her about a crush didn't come close.
Suddenly the tense lips and tapping made sense. She supposes it's natural for someone like Mifuel to feel so worried about, emotions and she let's him know that.
"Have you never had a crush?"
It's a stupid question on Jessica's end but Miguel's answer doesn't make it any easier.
"Of course I did. I was married, I had a wife."
"So then what's the big deal?"
"The big deal is I don't know how to tell them that!"
"To their face, Miguel. You're a grown man act like it."
"I know but have you ever been, scared of how something would go."
"Wow. You're scared of something? As much as I would've never thought you the type!"
"The type to what?"
It's urging. He's urging her to say something he knows he won't like. Jessica doesn't get that.
"You know. Feel things."
And he had succeeded. There's no doubt to him that it sucks because he now has confirmation that Jessica, someone he trusted fairly well, saw him how he saw himself and that was just the worst.
They talk about this for a while all while dancing around the actual person because Miguel could never admit that his somewhat hazardous taste in men.
It only takes an hour of constant panicking and constant reassurance for them to reach some form of conclusion.
"Just talk to her, whoever she is and tell her. You can even do it softly if you would like."
"I would like that, yes."
"Great then do that just don't scare her away with that face of yours. You look constipated." Jessica comments before leaving the room.
"Told you," Lyla remarks. "As much as you wear it constipation is not a good look for you."
"For the love of- stop saying I look constipated!"
"Then stop looking constipated!"
The two go back in forth for a bit and by the time they're done it's early enough for breakfast so Miguel makes some coffee and holes himself away again. He holes himself away and so the only thing he can do is think. And he thinks a lot about a lot of stuff but mostly about himself and mostly about Peter.
If he was being honest with himself he was being dumb and all around illogical which is the exact opposite of Miguel O'Hara and everything he worked so hard to portray. He felt helpless. Somehting he hasn't felt in years and worst of all he feels it over some white guy. How human of him.
Lyla would say thats because of his rose tinted glasses or whatever but there was nothing rose tinted about the way Parker made him feel. Miguel doesn't know much but he knows that he might more than like like Peter and he knows that calling it anything else will make it real so he sticks to his elementary lingo.
This is because while he's holed up he's still working, which means he's still checking the feed, which means he's still spying on Peter which means he's still admiring Peters work from his small den which is both unbelievably close and far away from Peter.
The perks of a multiverse.
His morning is long and mentally draining. The rest of the day, however, goes somewhat well with only minor hiccups mostly from a certain punks rebellious nature. In the afternoon Miguel has a rare break and decided to use it to finish filing patrol reports because he doesn't no one will.
Hours go by and his head pounds relentlessly he would ignore it but its so bad he's currently clutching all he can in his grasp with the grip strength of a steroid induced ape.
"Let's catch up on some sleep?"
Lyla suggest and Miguel wants to tell her no and how he shouldn't because, "a heros work is never done." Although he is not that righteous. So he does and she yells at him again and he tells her the same thing but then he tries to look back up at his screen and that almost takes him out.
"Maybe a few minutes."
"Maybe."
Miguel sleeps and he sleeps good. So good in fact that he doesn't even hear Peter dropping in on him.
"Hey Miguel!"
It takes Peter a few seconds to realize that Miguel isn't 'just' ignoring him and is in fact sleeping, something that Miguel swears he doesn't need to do.
Partly in adoration and partly because of the pure novelty Peter pulls out his phone and begins snapping photos and some of them he joins in dressing Miguel with bunny ears. By the end of the photo shoot he has a new folder dedicated to Miguel.
Setting up his usual hammock Peter settles into place rocking back and forth. He does this for a while until he decides he's bored of it. So he turns to his side and looks at Miguel. He does this for two reasons.
Number 1. This is the only time he'll be able to look at him for so long without Miguel noticing, although he does appreciate the way Miguel gets shy.
Number 2. Its one of his favorite past times.
A bit creepy he knows but that's why he does it at times like these. When he's the only one judging him, albeit it does more damage to him than the jaded words of the other Spiderpeople.
Turns out when you're such great friends with the stone cold boss people begin to envy you to a degree that is understandable, which is exactly why Peter never really complains about the snarky remarks he hears.
It was a fair trade in his eyes. Emphasis on his.
Minutes pass as Peter studies Miguel's face and he isn't quite tired of it yet but he is bored so he decides to mess with Miguel for a bit. Soon many webs can be found splattered all around Miguel. Turns out target practice is more necessary than Peter thought, 23 webs shot and only half hit Miguel's sleeping form.
With one final shot Peter hits his target and Miguel's mouth is covered by a web. The blockage of his airway seems to be enough to wake the sleeping man who lurches forward in his chair. He calms down once he sees Peter but he's still breathing harshly.
"Sorry buddy, accuracy practice is important."
"Parker." He groans.
Now awake Miguel reluctantly returns to his work the sound of Peter droning on coupled with the beeps of his screen filling him a familiarity he had grown accustomed to over the months they'd been doing this.
Peter has been swinging next to him for half an hour talking about trivial things. Suddenly he thinks back to the advice Jess gave him. " tell her." And. "Try not to scare her." She didn't know that it was actually a him but then again Peter is close enough to a woman in the aspect of Miguel's complete lack of inability to talk to him.
There's been a silence surrounding them for the past few minutes and Miguel hates it. The slight creaking of the webs swinging motion provides something for him to lean on but he's still pretty spineless.
"Hey Peter." Lyla calls out to the man
"Yeah?"
"You hear the story about the boy who cried wolf?"
"Yeah. Why?"
"You remember how much of a coward he was and so he locked himself away in his house waiting for the wolf to leave?" Lyla ask turning to look at Miguel. Who gets the messages and glares at her.
From his hammock Peter hums.
"Are you sure we read the same story because that sounded heavily targeted. And wrong." Peter comments still looking at his magazine.
"Hm. Must be a dimensional thing." Lyla comments.
From a sudden burst of courage and spite Miguel clears his throat before speaking up.
"So, I have this friend."
Immediately both Peter and Lyla speak up. "You have friends?"
Theres an intense wave of Dejavu and Miguel cant help the sigh that escapes his mouth.
"I have this friend that I like."
The sound of Peters makeshift hammock stops so after his sentence he pauses getting ready for a repeat of his conversation with Jessica earlier. But Peter seems to get the memo better than her and Miguel supposes he should've expected that because Peter doesn't call him unfeeling. He does however barrage him in questions.
"O hara you womanizer, which lucky girl is the spectacle of you attraction?" Peter ask and he sounds so happy that it makes Miguel sad.
Even though Miguel feels bad he tries not to let it show on his face on account of the second piece of advice.
"You don't know them."
"Well duh, but you like someone." Peter is fully at attention and leaned into Miguel's personal space unintentionally causing a heat to rise to Miguel's face.
Peters teasing tone only carries on for a bit and once he finally stops giggling at his superiors confession the sound of silence is deafening and just once Miguel wishes that Peter would never stop talking.
"Yeah, I do. I like them a lot."
His response is awkward and more of an attempt to fill silence that anything else but Peter doesn't bite at the bait. So he rambles himself into a spiral.
"They're OK I guess." He spills
"Well they've gotta be more than OK if they caught your eye." Peter raises his brow a few times and Miguel's face twist into a displeasing expression.
"But that's fine right. Because that's totally normal." Miguel elaborates searching for validation, still a spidermans greatest weakness.
"I don't think it's normal to like like your friend." Lyla teases coming from no where.
Aa subtle as it is Lylas disappearence leaves them staring at eachother. The quiet air that surrounds the two is stale and leaves their mouths dry.
"Maybe not. But I don't think it's normal to deny yourself what you want." Peter says responding to Lyla even though she isn't there anymore.
Miguel scoffs. "I don't want them. I don't want anything. I need them."
The air somehow gets stale and Miguel swears he can almost feel his eyes getting wet. That was a very personal admission of something he doesn't recognize and it's awkwardly quiet on his end.
"But you won't tell them that?" Peter asks.
"No-"
"Then die." Peter says and it's said with such stoicism that Miguel almost thinks he's being serious.
There's a tense silence and Miguel is unsure and his leg is bouncing more than normal and Peter notices.
"I think you're being a bit dramatic." Miguel says his voice higher than normal.
"Probably."
There's no doubt to either of them that this was the most open Miguel had ever been and it was no doubt to Peter that he would lose this quickly so he does nothing to set off Miguel, as if he's a deer. Peter simply smiles to himself and enjoy the feeling of Miguel feeling with him.
"Do you. Have someone you...?" Miguel ask trying to not outright ask his crush if he has someone he's seeing.
"Migs are you asking me about my relationship status. You're gonna make me blush!"
Jokes in Peter he already was and It made Miguel redden a bit too. Peters teasing gets to him more than he would care to admit but his blush makes it obvious that he's not actually upset.
"Relax Migs, I'm just teasing."
It's said with a pat to the knee and a fleeting moment if eyecontact that communicated more than what Miguel knew how to express.
After a deep breath Miguel's face returns to normal. 'Of course he's messing with me.'
"But if you're that curious yes, yes I do."
Miguel looks at him quickly. He knows that Peter is less emotionally guarded than him so it might be easy to get information out of him so he shoots.
"Whats her name?"
"I'm not just gonna tell you his name. Where's the fun in that?"
"His?"
"His.
Its a confirmation of everything he wants and yet he's still not close enough and he's also naive to think that Peter means him.
This is because Miguel knows plenty of 'he's who could be Peters, 'his'. And Miguel's an idiot.
He's also himself and really confused.