Tony is dead now
tones: wth was that dish ?!
nat: wdym ?
tones: IT WAS SO SPICY
greenguy: you’re just exaggerating
tones: I’m not ?!
There were at least like 69 jalapeños in that dish
archer: dude, like no else found it spicy
cap: I must agree with Tony, this dish was rather spicy
nat: Not u too :’)
tones: SEE EVEN CAP AGREES
AND DONT U THINK I DIDNT SEE HOW BANNER ALMOST CRIED
greenguy: yeah, but only cause I’m allergic to one of the spices she but in there
nat: I won’t do it again
sorry Banner
greenguy: Dw :)
tones: WBY THOR ?! Did you find it spicy???
thor: NOT REALLY, THE DINNER TODAY WAS PERFECT IF I MUST ADMIT
tones: OH CMON
archer: sorry to disappoint you but there was like one jalapeño max in there
It wasn’t spicy at all
cap: now that can’t be true now, right
tones: guys………
nat: yes ?
tones: somehow I think the food just got spicier
archer: HELP ???!!?
tones: YES SEND HELP
my mouth is burning
ISTG
MAKE IT STOP OR ILL DIE
archer: BAHAHAHAHAHA
literally lmfaoooooo
cap: tony, are you still alive ?
also I might have to join Tony
Because Nat, that food is spicy as hell
archer: anyone else also finding this rlly funny ?!
greenguy: yes
nat: yup
thor: indeed
tones: GUYS SRSLY MAKE IT STOP
nat: no
suffer
tones: you’re mean
nat: ik :)
tones: :(
archer: has anybody seen cap
he’s been quiet for some time now
nat: I’ll go check on him
……………………………………………………………………………………………
nat: he’s fine
drank like three litres milk when I found him
archer: BAHAHAHAHA
tones: help, not even I did that
cap: now that’s just mean from all of you
tones: imagine being a supersoldier and not being able to eat smth spicy
nat: imagine thinking you’re better than everyone and dying because of a dish
tones: :(
nat: :)
tones: imagine not being able to pull any bitches
greenguy: :(
cap: that’s mean
archer: couldn’t be me
nat: can’t relate to that at all
thor: NOT ME
tones: w h a t
SO YOURE TELLING ME EVEN NAT GOT HERSELF A MAN
TF
archer: THATS LITERALLY NOTHING NEW ?!
tones: nah you’re joking
nat: acc I’m married
tones: BFFR
nat: /srs
anyway me and Hill are upstairs
be too loud and die
;)
tones: guess I’ll be quiet then
greenguy: so is no one gonna address that Barton is dating someone ???
nat: no
cause Ik her
greenguy: ofc u do :(
nat: :)
greenguy: ok
WHAT ABOUT THOR THEN
GUYS ???
ANYONE STILL HERE ???
……………………………………………………………………………………………
* private chat of greenguy and archer *
G: pls tell me who you’re dating
A: ok so first of all I’m married
G: you too ???!!??
A: yeah, have been for abt 10 years
G: w h a t
ok tell me more
A: so I met Laura at Shield, when we were both agents. Later when I captured Nat, she helped me, keeping her safe during the deprogramming. We started dating while we were in charge of her. About two years later we married and we have two children, Cooper and Lila. They’re currently on a small farm.
G: YOU HAVE CHILDREN TOO
* dies of cuteness *
AND NAT GOT CAPTURED
W H A T
A: not my place to tell, but they don’t call her Black Widow for nothing, where do you think she got her reputation as worlds deadliest assassin and best spy from
G: I have never heard from that until now
A: literally how
We’re alr like one year a team or smth
G: it’s almost two years acc
A: RLLY ???!??
G: yup
pls Tell me how you and Nat met
A: ok, so………
……………………………………………………………………………………………
* private chat of Masha and Nat *
M: where did u put the towels
N: next to all the jewellery
M: thx <3
Awwwwww you still have that necklace I gave you on our first anniversary
N: ofc my love
M: can you bring some snacks
I wanna watch glee :(
N: ofc you do, gimme 5
M: :)
Btw the food was so delicious
N: Tony and Cap died from it
M: help
Also can you bring some vodka and a hot chocolate
N: alr got it
Got Friday to agree to not record anything in my living room
M: thank goodness
imagine the heart attack Tony would get if he saw that footage
N: u mean last week ???
M: yup
N: totally forgot about that
M: you really need to think of the cameras before doing me on the couch Nat
N: not my fault my wife’s so hot in her uniform
M: you’re lucky I love you
N: <3
……………………………………………………………………………………………
tones: nat wth happened to Fridays recordings
nat: idk what u mean
tones: don’t play so innocent
Ik it was u, no one else would have the ability to hack my Friday
nat: what bout Bruce ( sry banner )
tones: not the balls
greenguy: are u calling me a pussy ????!!?
cap: LANGUAGE
tones: anyway who was it
nat: not me
greenguy: me neither