His mumbattan admirerer

“Yeah… we can talk…” Miles softly whispers. He sits on his bed, he pats the space next to him for Pavitr to sit down.

He doesn’t.

Although it seemed a bit odd, Miles ignores this. For a moment, they stay in the room silently. Miles clicks his tongue onto the top of his mouth, looking the other way.

“I’ve been… meaning to talk to you too actually.” He starts. He closes his eyes and swallows the lump in his throat. His head spinning a bit as his palms get sweaty.

He was starting to get nervous.

Slowly, Pavitr approaches him. His heart is pounding and his face looks guilty as he extends his arm to hand the flowers over. Miles accepts the flowers with a deep breath. He examines them as a way to calm down.

Truth be told, Miles didn’t know much about flowers. He just knew they were pretty.

He only knew the ‘main ones’ like Roses and tulips. As well as daisies and what not.

Though these ones were ones he had never seen before. They were a bright and bold red color, almost the color of roses. The light radiating from his room gave them a bit of a shine.

He changes his attention to the flowers leaves. Their leaves were almost a heart shape. Like a valentine’s day card or a cartoon heart that you draw for your mom on a mothers day card. Truth be told, they were absolutely gorgeous. Infact, they were so pretty they almost looked fake. Like the plastic ones you’d get from the supermarket or dollar store. Their stems were neat, these flowers were carefully picked and taken care of.

He looks around the bouquet for a tag or something that would tell him the name of these flowers. He wanted to look them up, to find out the symbolism behind them. It seems Pavitr noticed him looking for the name, because Pavitr then speaks.

“They’re Anthurium flowers.” Pavitr informs, still looking away from Miles.

“My Maya auntie has a friend who’s a florist, I saw them and thought of you.” He adds on, fidgeting with his hands.

“Now,” Pavitr breaths in, starting to speak again slowly. “Let’s… talk about the kiss.”

His voice was soft and low, like he didn’t want to be heard. It was as if he didn’t want to hear himself speak.

Miles noticed, though he didn’t comment on that part, he just nodded and spoke.

“I’ve been wanting to talk to you about that too.” He admits, his voice a whisper.

“You can talk first.” Miles utters, placing the flowers down. Right now, he knew what he wanted. He knew that he was ready for Pavitr to have his heart. Afterall, he had already stole it without either of them knowing.

Though he could let Pavitr speak first, it was important enough for him to come all the way to another dimension. So he should have the mic.

Pavitr took a breath in, he looks at Miles face. His own filled with sadness as he begins.

“I think that… the kiss was just a rush of emotions that came crashing into us too fast for us to really fully understand and grasp. I was worried sick for… what felt like weeks, wondering if I did something to hurt you or if we both rushed into stuff unintentionally.” He explains, his voice cracking a bit as he remembers the events. Before Miles could comfort him by putting a hand on his shoulder, Pavitr gets up.

“But now… I think I know what it is.”

“Miles, those flowers I gave you.. they symbolize many things… and in this case. Theyre meant for an apology.” Pavitr informs, backing up from the bed and heading closer to the window. He turns around to hide his face as he lets the next part escape from his lips.

His voice is soft and low. He speaks so silently, it’s like he isn’t speaking atall. It was like he didn’t want to hear himself say what he was saying. It was almost like he didn’t want MILES to hear it either.

“I’m sorry, Miles.” He starts, his voice turning into a soft and low whimper.

Before Miles could even speak, before Miles could comfort Pavitr. To ask him what’s wrong, SOMETHING. Pavitr says something that Miles was never going to be prepared to hear. Not even in a million years.

“Though I think we should really just stay friends.” Pavitr announced, his voice was small as he let a small sniffle out. He uses his watch to make a portal behind him, stretching his mask over his face and turning around to face Miles again.

“मुझे तुमसे प्यार है” He whispers under his breath. Finally, he said something low enough for Miles to not hear.

Not that it would matter if he did, being that Miles couldn’t understand Hindi. He turns around again and enters the portal, his hurt aching as he rethinks his decisions from tonight.

As for Miles, he just stood there. A thousand emotions running through his head at a time.

For starters, he wanted to yell or scream or throw something at a wall. He wanted to be angry. He wanted to let out his frustrations. Why him? WHY???? Right now was the first time he was ever actually in love with someone. This time it wasn’t just some lie he was forcing himself to live in. He never loved Gwen just like how She never loved him. He just got over the lie he lived and NOW he couldn’t even live in the truth he had for himself.

Though right now, he couldn’t yell. He couldn’t scream. He couldn’t throw anything. He couldn’t even fully be mad. He knew he walked into this, he knew he had waited too long to do something about this situation.

And as much as he was angry at himself, at the narrative that was his life for betraying him yet again and making him deal with the pain of his reality and stupid choices, he was also sad. Not because Pavitr wanted to just be friends, but because it was Miles fault Pavitr did it.

And so, instead of screaming or yelling or throwing things at walls… he stood against his wall, slumped down to the floor, and cried.

Truth be told, Miles hadn’t cried in a long time. Infact, it was around two years since he had. Which almost sounds unbelievable, but it was the truth. He had come close to crying a couple times, like when he remembers his uncles death or other sad things, though he never… actually did end up crying. He just sucked it up and moved on with his day.

So right now, he was allowing himself to fall apart.

To say the very least, he didn’t like it.

He usually outran his emotions by doing art, though right now it all hurt too much to ignore.

He couldn’t draw the feelings away, this time it was different.

The tears came down his cheeks, hot and hard. His heart aching as he sobs into the palm of his hand, his face heating up as he does so. He cried so hard that he felt dizzy, his head hurt and his eyes stung. Yet he couldn’t stop, even though he physically hurt he couldn’t stop it. He just kept on.

He was feeling so much at once, namely Anger and Sadness.

He wanted to punch a wall, to kick a desk, SOMETHING.

Yet he also wanted to curl up and cry until he couldn’t feel his face anymore.

He stammers from the floor to his bed, though before laying down, he notices something in the corner of his room.

A bear.

*The bear Pavitr gave him*

Stares at it for awhile, admiring the sewing and soft fabric.

For awhile, it makes him feel better.

Though then it makes him remember the exact thing that got him into this mess.

The kiss.

That stupid freaking kiss.

He walks over to the bear, fist balled up. He almost wanted to punch it.

Though then he remembered how Pavitr was the one who gave it to him as a gift.

And that just made him sad again.

He sits down on the bears legs, curling up and squeezing it. He closes his eyes, breathing deeply as he inhales the scent of the bear.

It still smelt like Pavs cologne…

And just like that, he calmed down.

Slowly, but surely, he did.

His chest still felt hallow, deep down he was still a bit upset.

But for now? He could bring himself together. Just be calm for a little.

Besides, crying so much made him tired.

He mummurs before falling asleep, a small frown semi present on his face.

“I love you..”