Seventy-Eight Weeks

One and a half years has passed since Kara had seen her the last time. Eighteen months of mourning, grieving, crying and suffering. Seventy-eight weeks since she lost her smile and her own heart.

 Of course she was smiling but it never reached her eyes. It never reached her heart either. Whenever Supergirl saved people and ended the procedure with her Superpose she smiled and nodded her head with her hands on her hips.

Whenever Alex almost tried to force her to finally speak about Lena, she refused it. Each time, Alex was there and held her while she cried. Alex was there when she refused to eat or sleep. Alex was there when Kara drank herself to sleep with some good Alienstuff from Al’s Bar.

 Alex never knew what happened between them eighteen months ago. And if Alex was honest, she missed Lena too. Sometimes she feared that Lena had hurt Kara, but she knew Lena and was sure she would had never done anything to hurt her on purpose.

But now, Lena was unavailable, she was nowhere to be found, it was like she vanished from this earth.

 Even Brainy wasn’t able to find her with his 5-dimension-logic. Nia tried to dream her, but she also wasn’t successful. Jon tried to connect to her via mind but it was like, Lena never wanted to be found.

 Alex tried the most normal way, via telephone and FBI sources, she tried to reach out for Sam, she even tried to get a hint from Ruby, but everything wasn’t successful.  

And Kara?

Kara tried everything in her power. She flew from Paris to London, Tokyo, Sydney- around the whole world just to hear one heartbeat to restart her own. Not even a glimpse of a beat. She never heard anything.

Some days, part of her terrified that Lena might be dead, but to be honest, she knew how much Lena was hurt. Plus in case of her dead, she would have known through Sam or Andrea right?

So Kara knew for sure that Lena was there somewhere. This knowing was the only thing which held her up. Deep down inside of her, she knew as long as both were on this earth, there will be 0,00001 percentage chance for them to reunited, as Brainy would say.

Now, after seventy-eight weeks, Kara’s mind changed into something aggressive. It made her aggressive not to be able to find her. She never felt those feelings before, sure thing she was desperate und hurt before, but being aggressive was totally out of character.

One night she wasn’t able to hold herself together anymore. She flew up to Lena’s former office and hang there in the air, breathing in deeply. Remembering all those moments of happiness with her.

 She felt anger bubbling up inside of her when she saw Andrea, Lena’s new L-Corp CEO.

Andrea was a workaholic like Lena. But no one compared to Lena in any universe.

Andrea felt like being watched and she looked through the windows, without seeing anyone. Kara felt angry tears building up in her eyes and she breathed out loudly to try to calm herself, while she landed softly on the balcony. 

Andrea saw her and huffed out annoyed while moving to the door. She opened it and asked: “Supergirl. What an honor. What do you want?” She moved back inside and sat down on her marble table again and poured herself a glass of wine.

Kara followed her and looked around. Andrea didn’t changed much, and mostly everything reminded her of Lena. Maybe for a possible return? 

She stood in front of Andrea, helplessly and couldn’t form words. Her anger was to much and she wasn’t used to this feeling. 

But Andrea didn’t forced her. She waited because she sensed the radiation around Supergirl. After a while and an empty glass of wine, Andrea asked again, to much time passed in silence. “Supergirl. What’s the matter? I have work to do as you see.” 

Kara took a deep breath and huffed out angry: “you need to tell me where she is.” Andrea raised her eyebrows and poured a second glass. Andrea: “I can’t tell you.” And took a sip while waiting for Kara to continue. 

Kara closed her eyes and inhaled in loudly. She didn’t knew for herself why she came here in the first place. She felt miserably and needed answers. “You.need.to.tell.me!” 

She tried again, more agitated, more forcefully. 

Andrea almost felt bad for her, seeing the woman of steel in front of her, with tears in her eyes. She sat down and sighed: “so you’re here for little Danvers?” She wasn’t conscious if she knew that she was aware of her Identity. 

Kara laughed out bitterly and nodded at first, trying to make sense of her thoughts in her mind and shook her head one second later. One single tear sliding down her cheek as she answered: “I am little Danvers. And I don’t care if you will sell the news to CatCo or any other newspaper.” She took a deep breath, closed her eyes and slammed her hand down to the marble table- it crashed, while she continued: “So please, tell me where she is.” The feeling of her eyes started heating up was unbearable. This feeling inside of her made her powers furious and uncontrollably.

 But still Andrea sat there, completely unimpressed and in silence, sipping her wine. “You know, I can buy a new table, but I would be delighted if you wouldn’t burn down Lenas Office. So take a breath and calm down a moment.” 

Kara shook her head, more and more tears left her fiery eyes, but she refused to open them. She didn’t want to lose control. She stammered: “I can’t.”

Andrea sighed and said, almost compassionate: “I won’t tell you where she is, because it was her wish and you should accept it as long as she needs time.”

 It gave Kara the opposite feeling of becoming calmer.

Andrea stood up slowly, walked around the table and put a hand on Kara’s shoulder softly, when she said: “but I’ll tell you that she is alright, as much as she could be with everything. She isn’t in danger, she is healthy.” 

Those words hit Kara differently. To hear those words calmed her nerves, because it was the most important thing to hear that she was alive and healthy.

Her eyes stopped glowing and she was finally able to breath again. But knowing Andrea, with her heart on her tongue, she said: “but she’s heartbroken and needs to heal.”

Kara whimpered and sank down to the ground on her knees. She hid her face behind her hands and sobbed heartbrokenly. Every hidden feeling all those month bursted out of her right in this moment.

In front of Andrea. A woman with a heart of stone, but with a weak spot for Lena. Sometimes Kara was jealous and suspicious of their relationship, because she feared that Andrea would hurt Lena. She didn’t trust Andrea.

In the end Kara was the one who hurt Lena.

Andrea caressed her shoulder softly, careful to not overstep any unspoken boundaries and said softly: “I know how you feel. But she’ll come around when she’s ready.”

 Kara huffed, angry about herself, ashamed that she put herself into this situation. “How can you know what I feel.”

Andrea laughed bitterly: “Because I made the same mistake as you when Lena and I went to collage. I also voted for work and against feelings. It took us 7 years, when she reached out again.”

 Kara looked up with puffy red eyes and felt a peng of Jealousy inside her stomach again. But she pushed it away and said: “I didn’t know.”

Andrea smiled and shrugged her shoulders: “I bet. If Lena forgave you once, she’ll never speak about it again and move on. And now as adults, we are closer than ever.”

Kara body tensed up immediately  and Andrea chuckled when she adds: “in a non romantic way.”

And Kara relaxed. They sat there in silence until Kara said quietly: “Thank you for telling me that she’s alright. And…” she showed to the table nervously: “Sorry about that.”

Andrea furrowed her brows, jokingly: “you don’t want to offer to pay the costs for a new table?”

Kara laughed and wiped away her tears and shook her head: “No, I’m sure I can’t afford the costs for the next 10 years.” Andrea laughed.

Kara stood up and felt slightly better. The anger was still there but she was relieved to know that Lena has Sam and Andrea. At least she was sure of that, that Lena has friends who look out for her. There was one more thing she needed to know. A crinkle in her brow appeared while she asked: “You didn’t seem surprised when I told you I’m Supergirl.”

Andrea moved around the broken table and shrugged her shoulders. “I knew. Glasses won’t hide you when you look through peoples eyes. I’ve known for a while, but be sure, if I wanted to sell it to the media I would have long ago. We don’t might be on best terms, but Lena cares about you, so I wouldn’t do anything to jeopardize our friendship.”

 Kara smiled and muttered “Thank you. For Everything.” Andrea nodded and Kara was gone with a wush.

The first time since months she slept more than a few minutes.