you've got the wrong girl

僕のヒーローアカデミア | Boku no Hero Academia | My Hero Academia (Anime & Manga)
F/F
F/M
M/M
G
you've got the wrong girl
Summary
Ochako (with the help of her friends) goes through some extreme tactics in hopes to seduce Izuku the best she can. She tries and tries, and tries, but that boy always seems to bring his mind back to Katsuki. Why is that?
Note
hi!this is kind of funny, i hope.my friend and i are writing this together!i've been writing the bkdk chapters.but in the future (when there's togachako) she writes the majority of that since i don't know their dynamic very well.hopefully you enjoy it! i'm not used to writing crack things.
All Chapters Forward

red boba tea

Izuku spread his arms on either side of him, looking in the mirror with a slight pout. He spun around to scrutinize it. Then, he turned toward Katsuki, who was watching intently from the middle of Izuku’s bed. The blond propped his hand on his chin, feigning disinterest.

“How’s this?” Izuku asked.

The outfit in question was a pair of black pants and a white t-shirt that had an artificial bowtie printed around the collar. Katsuki almost regurgitated just looking at it, however, he found it a bit cute, so he gave Izuku a thumbs up.

“Looks fine,” Katsuki said with an amused grin, “Real fancy.”

“Is it obviously fake?” He questioned, gesturing to the printed bowtie around his neck.

“Is it o–? Yes!How the fuck would that be convincing?”

Izuku crossed his arms over his chest like he was hiding, “I don’t know! Uraraka looks nice so now I feel self-conscious.” He sighed and turned back toward the mirror, trying to flatten down his hair. It wasn’t working very well, “I just feel like–-she’s been making an effort to improve her style. Not that it was bad before! Just, the dresses and stuff…I don’t have anything to match.”

“You’re fine, nerd. She isn’t gonna cancel just because you look like a little boy who snuck into the prom. You’re still friends, after all.”

Izuku smiled at him from the mirror, “Yeah, you’re right. Also, I’m opting to ignore that description.”

Katsuki smiled too, “I have more.”

“Do you?”

“Yeah,” Katsuki tapped his chin, pretending to think, “A penguin. My worst nightmare. My mom’s worst nightmare. Fucking hell, you would not wanna let my mom catch you wearing that shit.”

“Oh, I hope not. Auntie would be very disappointed in me.”

“You bet. Don’t plan on coming to dinner anytime soon if she sees this.”

Izuku laughed and went over to his desk to shuffle through some drawers, “Please, convince her someone is impersonating me.”

“I’ll think about it,” Katsuki looked him up and down, “It is a monstrosity.”

“I thought you said it was fine!” Izuku whined with a shake of his head.

“Fine for you.”

“Gee, thanks, Kacchan.”

“Don’t mention it.”

Izuku scoffed and threw a pencil over his shoulder, which missed Katsuki by a mile and instead landed across the room. He searched until he pulled out an old-looking wallet that seemed to have been around since the stone age. It was stitched, and the thread frayed at the edges, as well as being made of old leather. There were a few questionable scratches on it as well. Nevertheless, Izuku exclaimed triumphantly and closed the drawer, turning around to display what he had been looking for.

Katsuki narrowed his eyes, “The fuck is that?”

“My wallet!” Izuku clutched the object to his chest with an offended look, “My trusty old wallet.”

“That shit is fucking prehistoric.”

“Yeah, well, I’m sure the velociraptors took excellent care of it, Kacchan,” Izuku gave him a glare before reaching over to check his phone. His eyebrows raised, “Crap, it’s 4:56!”

Katsuki rolled his eyes, physically trying to avoid the sick feeling in his core, “You better get going then.”

“Yeah,” Izuku agreed hurriedly, rushing to turn off his bedside lamp while the blond sat on the bed with a bored look, “I invited Todoroki and Iida to join us too! So hopefully I won’t be the last one down there.”

Katsuki’s brain skidded to a stop. He spoke very slowly, “You what?”

“Invited Todoroki and Iida to come with us–?” Izuku replied in confusion, “Is that bad?”

He what?

Bless this oblivious nerd. No way. The weight on Katsuki’s chest became lighter as he suddenly began to laugh at the circumstances. Because Izuku just unknowingly invited two other people to chaperone his date. Except, it wasn’t a date to him. But it was definitely a date to Ochaco.

“Why are you laughing?” Izuku was frozen in place, “Kacchan–”

“Nothing.”

“Tell me!”

"No."

"Whyyyyyy?"

“Just go, idiot! You’re gonna be late, aren’t you?”

“Wha–” He looked down at his phone again, “Fine! But I won’tforget this!” Izuku promised him with a sharp hand gesture, rushing out of his room and not even bothering to make Katsuki leave as well.

 

Downstairs, there stood Iida, Shoto, and Ochaco all waiting for Izuku in the common area. The brunette was gaping at the two of them before she squeezed her temple and leaned against the wall with a deep sigh, “He what?”

“He asked if we wanted to join your friendly hangout,” Shoto explained with minimal expression.

As much as he loved Ochaco, he didn’t believe she would be a good match for Izuku. That boy seemed to prefer explosive things. More explosive things that she couldn’t imitate. He was still here for her anyway.

Ochaco laughed dryly, “Oh my—”

“Uraraka!” Iida said, a little too loudly, “Would you like Todoroki and me to cancel?”

“Ah! No, no! If Deku didn’t think this was a date, then it doesn’t matter anyway…” She said with a bitter edge to her voice, “I might just cancel too.”

She pulled out her phone–

“Wait!” Iida shook his head to dismiss her words, “He may just be afraid to be alone with you. People are nervous around those they have romantic affections for.” Iida, however, was in support of the relationship, “I believe he simply is afraid to be with his crush!”

Ochaco gave him a sad but hopeful look, “You think so?”

“Absolutely! You shouldn’t make assumptions about his feelings so quickly.”

Shoto resisted the urge to call his friend a hypocrite, but instead, he simply grimaced, watching as Izuku came clambering out of the elevator in probably the strangest outfit he had ever seen. All eyes turned toward the new arrival, trying to mask that they were just talking about him.

Iida cleared his throat, “Midoryia.”

“Guys, hey! What’s up? Sorry, I’m a bit late–I uh, couldn’t find what to wear, but no worries! Are we ready to go? Were you waiting on me?”

Ignoring his questions, Iida quickly inclined his head, “Todoroki and I are not feeling well. We will have to postpone this get-together for another time.”

Izuku looked surprised, “O-Oh! I’m sorry you’re sick. I hope you feel better! Um…do you know when you would be able to get together again–?”

“Nope,” Shoto answered. He hated lying, even though no one could tell by his nonchalant expression how much it was bothering him, “We can talk about it later.”

“Ah, right, sorry. It doesn’t make sense for you to know now. Are we all—?”

Ochaco placed a delicate hand on his shoulder. Today, she was wearing blue jeans and a v-neck pink top that dug low. She batted her eyelashes with a smile, “Oh, Deku-kun. Don’t you want to be with me?”

Izuku flushed and waved his hands around nervously, “Sorry! I didn’t mean it like that. We can, um, we can still go now!” He was frozen stiff as she looked at him, “That would be fine.” He paused, “Fine as in good fine, not bad fine.”

She rubbed her hand down his shoulder until it reached his forearm, then she squeezed it before letting go, “Great. Let’s go!”

“Have fun.”

Shoto eyed her suspiciously as the pair walked out of the dorm, Ochaco leaning sensually close as she spoke to Izuku about something. The way she was moving, acting, using all of these tactics that were inauthentically Ochaco. Shoto narrowed his eyes as he watched her discreetly move the collar of her shirt before the door closed behind them.

He suspected Mina was responsible for this.

And he was right.

As of yesterday, Ochaco had been enrolled in what Mina liked to call “flirting 101”. It pertained to the two girls sitting in her bedroom while Mina paced and drilled information she had learned from various romance mangas into Ochaco’s brain.

The brunette sat crisscrossed on the ground, listening intently.

Mina spoke in her "professor" voice. She had also put on a suit, just to sell the part, “You must get close. A lot of little touches mean more than big ones, every little touch makes sparkles shimmer around you. Build up, girl, build up. Got it?”

Ochaco nodded.

Now, as Izuku and her walked down the street, she walked close to his side so that their hands and shoulders brushed every time they moved. Izuku seemed stiff as a board. Ochaco wondered what she could do to make this easier on him, to help ease his nerves.

“Hey,” she said softly, smiling as he looked down at her, “Is everything okay?”

Izuku scratched the back of his neck with a blush, averting his eyes, “Yeah, everything’s fine! Are you…good?”

“I’m great,” Ochaco bumped his hand with hers, “I’m always great when you’re with me, Izuku.” She said with a dash of sugar on his name.

The boy in question laughed nervously before clearing his throat, “Oh, um–-I’m glad, then!”

The way their feet hit the concrete reminded Ochaco of the way Mina’s feet paced when she had said, “Be suggestive. Don’t make it obvious, make it sweet, sweet enough to get him thinking. We both know he likes to think.”

Then, Mina crouched down and looked her in the eyes, “Also, say his first name!”

Ochaco made a mental note of everything Mina had said, and she was reviewing it now as she and Izuku approached the shop, making conversation about anything. When they reached the door, Izuku stepped to the side so he could hold it open for her.

“After you!” He said with a smile.

Ochaco could have kissed him then and there, but because of Mina’s insistence that she not make any big moves, she refrained.

And thank goodness she did.

Ochaco smiled, her eyes flicking down to his lips, and tucked a strand of hair behind her ear, “Thank you. You’re so sweet.”

“It’s no problem.”

Inside the shop, there was a pink theme surrounding all the booths and counters. The lights were hanging with little glass orbs around them, and the atmosphere was dim and cozy. When they entered, they were first greeted by a giant menu, which looked like an overwhelmingly long list. Izuku hummed and squinted his eyes at the small calligraphy.

Ochaco recommended something she had gotten before, and because Izuku was starting to sweat as he tried to decipher the menu, he ordered the same thing as her. While they waited for their drinks, they took a spot in a booth by the window. It was sunny outside. Despite the warm appearance, the autumn chilled the air.

“It’s nice in here,” Ochaco commented, “Very romantic.”

“Hm. I was thinking it looked more ominous. Like you could tell a ghost story,” Izuku gestured to the low shadows hanging on their faces.

“Mm, I’ve always preferred love stories.”

“Why’s that?”

Ochaco pretended to think, “Well, I love the constant chase in them. How they're always grasping for each others’ hearts–” she rested her chin on her hand, gazing at him with hooded lids, “–only for one of them to eventually give in.”

“I see!” Izuku nibbled on his nail, thinking, “I guess that chase happens in ghost stories too. It usually ends with someone dying though, so that’s not as rewarding as love.”

She gritted her teeth into a tight smile, “Totally.”

“Are you sure you’re okay?” He leaned closer to her, “You look like you’re trying to push out an egg. Is something wrong? Are you hurting?”

Ochaco leaned forward as well, “No, I’m not hurting.”

Izuku raised his eyebrows at the proximity, “Is it something else?”

“What do you think?”

“You might have to tell me.”

“Mm–” She closed her eyes and allowed her body to take her forward.

However, the tip of her nose collided with something cold, and she fell back with a squeak. Her eyes flew open. The waiter held a drink between them, waiting for someone to take it. Ochaco glared daggers at him. But Izuku only took the drink with a smile.

The waiter set the other drink down in front of her, and she angrily wondered why he had to hold it between them anyway. She only knew that the universe was not on her side. But that wouldn’t stop her!

“Thank you!” Izuku said happily.

“You’re Welcome,” The waiter said, walking away with a push-cart and off to serve another table.

Izuku admired the drinks. They were bright red with black pearls floating at the bottom, and the sunlight reflecting against the glass gave the illusion of summer. He hummed appreciatively and glanced up from them and over to his friend.

“This is strawberry tea right?” He got a look at her face “Um, are you–?”

Ochaco, who, if this was an old cartoon, would have had steam coming out of her ears, forced a quick grin. She couldn’t believe that had happened. She could have sworn Izuku was on the tips of her fingers, his lips a breath from hers. All she had to do was move faster, with less hesitance. Maybe he didn’t want to kiss her anyway. But nevertheless, Ochaco believed they could have had it then, and her heart was hammering.

Izuku took a sip, “Woah! This is so good. Thanks for recommending this one.”

“You’re welcome,” She smiled, “I think we have similar tastes. Compatible, in a way.”

“Yeah, we both like sweet things, huh,” Izuku continued drinking it down quickly. He swallowed a pearl, “I’ve also been craving spicier things recently! I think Kacchan’s been getting me into that stuff.”

If Ochaco had a dollar for every time Izuku mentioned Katsuki, she would be filthy rich. Wealthy enough that she wouldn’t need a hero salary.

“Mhm!” She took a sip too, “You like spicy ramen and broth? He makes a lot of that, right?”

“Yep! It's super good. I could eat it all the time, but that isn’t very healthy, I guess,” Izuku laughed lightly, “How about you?”

Ochaco gazed out the window and then back at him, “I think I could eat sweet things all the time.” (She wanted to wink but that felt like too much).

“Ah, that’s fair. It’s addicting.”

They fell into a comfortable silence with a few conversations here and there. It was going smoothly, nicely, well enough that Ochaco’s heart was feeling incredibly encouraged. She kept making more flirtatious comments that she couldn’t tell whether Izuku picked up on or not. But it didn’t matter. He blushed enough to keep her going.

Izuku was drinking his tea much faster than her. And when his was gone, he was watching her cup with a tilt of his head as if he was thinking about something. She was pretending not to watch him, opting to gaze outside.

Ochaco’s periphery convinced her Izuku was watching her.

She tried to look as dreamy as she could manage.

However, Izuku's eyes were on something else.

After a beat, Izuku spoke up, “That color really reminds me of Kacchan’s eyes! Red and daring.” He paused, “Beautiful, in a way.”

Ochaco choked on her tea.

 

When they arrived back to the dorms, Izuku was rambling off in her ear about something, while Ochaco listened half-heartedly. Her mind was elsewhere. She thought it was going well, and it did go well enough, but still, Ochaco was having difficulty focusing. Because did Izuku really just use the word beautifulwhen referring to Katsuki of all people?

The blond was sitting on the couch, playing video games with Mina. It wasn’t an intense game, they had Minecraft projected on the screen. Neither of them had looked up yet. Ochaco took this opportunity to observe Katsuki’s calm expression, the way it rested when it wasn’t contorted or sanctimoniously taunting. She considered it. She wanted to see what Izuku saw in it.

Katsuki’s lips protruded slightly as he gathered iron. His lips were full and smooth. His nose sloped with a slight bump near the middle, his eyes without aggressive regard. He looked almost gentle. She couldn’t really find anything other than an accurate description. But she supposed he was beautiful.

Ochaco wondered if he always looked beautiful, and she just hadn’t cared to notice. Katsuki never regarded her with a gentle disposition.

She glanced over to Izuku.

And Izuku was watching Katsuki with an expression she couldn’t place. Almost as though he wasn’t aware of himself doing it, it just came naturally that Katsuki was the one Izuku chose to see. Izuku’s eyes looked melancholy, almost desperate, far away.

However, Ochaco didn’t understand why.

“Hey, guys!” Toru greeted them, walking over to the couch with a phone in her hand (or a floating screen inches away from her body).

This prompted everyone to look up from what they were doing. Their classmates greeted them briefly before returning to their tasks. And when, finally, Katsuki looked over, he caught Izuku’s eye.

Ochaco could have sworn she felt Izuku shiver.

He turned to her quickly, “I-I had a lot of fun! Thank you for inviting me.”

“Yeah, of course. I had fun too,” Ochaco smiled tightly and nodded, turning away from him and making her move to the elevator so she could go upstairs and scream into her pillow.

 

Mina came up not long after, hardly knocking before she entered and softly shut the door behind her. Ochaco was laying starfished on her bed, face buried in her pillow, and her hair sprawled across her eyes. She perked up when she heard her friend enter.

“Hey,” Mina took a long look at her, “Uh, what’s up?”

Ochaco responded by banging her fists furiously into the mattress and kicking her feet around, her screams of agony swallowed by the pillow.

Mina rushed over to her and tapped her on the back, “Hey! Hey! Honey, what’s wrong? Are you okay?”

“I hate him!” Ochaco exclaimed, rolling over to look her friend in the eye, “No, I don’t hate him. Why is he like this?” She demanded, “WHY?”

“Love, I don’t know what’s going on,” Mina sat down beside her, “What happened?”

Ochaco cleared her throat, “I want to wrap my arms around his neck and strangle him to death. With love. Not with love. I don’t even know! I want to pinch his cheeks and also make him float into the sun,” She made an aggressive face and wrung her hands, “Grab his head and squeeze it until he–”

“Slow down,” Mina, using her critical thinking skills, deciphered her rant quickly with a nod, “Ah, so good old Midoryia is confusing you.”

“You could say that,” The brunette grumbled, glaring at the ground, “I go from thinking he wants to kiss me to thinking I’m his bestie in less than a second.”

“Maybe he doesn’t know what he wants either,” Mina suggested.

Except, Izuku did know what he wanted.

Something neither of them would have considered, that is.

“Well, he better figure it out!” Ochaco grabbed her pillow and chucked it across the room.

Mina raised her eyebrows and ducked out of the way, “You gotta go to a rage room or something…”

“I want to rage on Deku’s face!” She shouted. Then covered her mouth with her hand, “Oops, not–”

“It’s okay, it's okay,” Mina reached out to take her hand, “It’s gonna be fine. Remember, we have other ideas, okay?”

“Okay...”

They smiled. Mina squeezed her hand.

“Let’s stop thinking about boys. Come play games with me!” Mina suggested, dragging her friend off of the bed and bouncing toward the door.

Ochaco smiled, “Okay.”

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