A B Minus Performance At Best
As Yelena and Natasha were trying to keep a low profile— and they didn’t have any money— at least, Natasha couldn’t access her money without giving herself away— Maria went out to pick up food for them, despite the late hour there were a few bars and all night places open not that far from where they were. Maria was a bit skeptical about the plan, was she going to come back with food and Natasha and Yelena would be gone? Based on Yelena being so hungry that she ate an off brand Russian Oreo that had been out in the open for an undetermined amount of months (or years) Maria had to take a reasonable guess that at least she would be here when she got back.
In Maria’s absence Yelena plopped herself right next to Natasha, on the messy queen size bed that was weirdly in the living room of this residence. Yelena’s face was eagerly waiting for details. Natasha turned her head to the side and looked down at Yelena, she groaned.
“No.” Natasha said glaring at Yelena before she even asked.
“Uhm, you can’t just say ‘no.’” Yelena huffed in an annoyed tone.
“I just did.” Natasha looked away from her.
“A hot spy lady just showed up out of the blue, who used to be your boss and your girlfriend apparently, and she took a bullet for you and you shot someone in the face for her? I need the story here.” Yelena said with a whine.
“That’s the story. You got it, all of it. That’s it.” Nat shrugged.
“I guess I’ll ask her then.”
“Ha! Good luck.” Natasha snorted to herself, if Yelena thought Nat was a closed book, just wait until she tried to get something out of Maria, Maria could beat a literal stonewall in a stonewalling contest. “Plus, she’s leaving, tomorrow.” Natasha said confidently.
“Does she know that? Why?” Yelena asked.
“What do you mean why? So she doesn’t get killed.”
“But she was your boss right and the boss is usually better than their employees.” Yelena baited.
“No, no, that’s not how that works.”
“Are you just afraid that if she stays you’ll realize she’s more talented and better than you?” Yelena continued wondering what was the issue preventing these two women from working together.
“No, of course not. We are both very talented and skilled, we have different strengths, and she’s smart, really smart, that’s kind of her thing.”
“Oh, you’re both skilled, talented, and she’s smart, and you’re an idiot.” Yelena nodded. “I get it, we don’t want smart capable people around.” Yelena teased and Natasha sighed.
“I am not an idiot.” Natasha glared and smirked at her sister in a playful way and Yelena smiled at her and made a face.
“She’s a spy right? That’s what she said?”
“Yeah, something like that.”
“Can she get supplies and gear and stuff easier than you?”
“Yeah… probably.”
“And, no one is looking for her, right?”
“Probably not…”
“So she can access her money and things and move around easier than we can?” Yelena asked in an obvious tone.
“I get the functionality of having her around, but I do not want her here.”
“Why? Because you broke up or something?”
“No. We’re always broken up, or together, it’s complicated, it’s annoying.”
“Stop breaking up, that would solve the problem.”
Natasha sighed loudly, yeah, it sure would.
“You don’t understand it’s more complicated than all of this.”
“Why?” Yelena asked like an obnoxious toddler.
“It.. just is…”
“That’s not a reason, what’s the reason?”
Natasha sighed loudly, was having a little sister always this annoying.
“If you don’t tell me I am going to tell her that you used to have blue hair.” Yelena threatened.
“She’d probably think that was awesome.” Natasha smirked to herself.
“Let me just tell you, it was not awesome on you.” Yelena grinned and Natasha threw a pillow at her.
“I am doing you a favor!” Yelena laughed.
Natasha sighed, was this really what having a sibling was like?
“What’s the reason? If she can help and she wants to help, let her help.” Yelena remarked again and her stomach growled from hunger.
“I already almost got Maria killed once, on accident. I was trying to help and I made it worse, I think, I don’t know. I can’t be the reason something happens to her.” Natasha had done an total 180 on her stance a few years ago when Maria was saying this exact same thing to her and Natasha couldn’t understand why Maria would not accept her help or plan something with her, or work together. Natasha couldn’t wrap her mind around it then, but now she understood, she understood it deeply.
“Oh…. you love her.” Yelena said with a light smile and Natasha paused.
“No, absolutely not.” Natasha lied without an ounce of conviction.
“You love, love her.”
“No, that’s not the reason. I am incapable of romantic love.” Natasha said coldly and robotically and Yelena laughed at her.
“Apparently not…” Yelena smirked.
“No, it’s not because I ‘love, love’ her… it’s because she’s an important person in the world, she helps a lot of people, she’s smart, she needs to be around. Trust me, the world can go on without me here, but losing Maria could cause a global catastrophe.” Natasha tried to make up something convincing and Yelena stared at her.
“When’s the wedding?” Yelena asked with big bratty grin. “Am I am your maid of honor?” She smiled widely teasing her sister.
“Shut up!” Natasha fell backwards onto her bed and Yelena was stunned to see her sister this way. It made Yelena really happy, that normal things and relationships would be out there for her too. If Natasha could have them, so could she.
“If that’s the reason, just tell her that’s the reason, why do you two have to make things so complicated, just discuss it like adults?”
Natasha groaned, Maria and Natasha do something in their personal lives that straightforward, sincere, and simple? Not possible.
“It just doesn’t work like that.” Nat mumbled.
“Why?” Yelena asked again.
“Wow, this is just like when you were a toddler.”
“Not an answer.”
“I don’t want her to think I’m a sap.” Natasha suggested and Yelena laughed and then Natasha leaned up on her messy comforter, propping her shoulders up because she just got an idea. She knew exactly how to get Maria to leave and go back home, Natasha smiled to herself. Yelena saw the light go off in Natasha’s brain and she raised a brow.
“What are you plotting?” Yelena questioned.
“Nothing, you’re right, I’m just going to be honest with her.” Natasha said with a little shrug and smirk to herself but Yelena knew she was up to something.
A short while later, Maria returned with Russian bar food for them to eat, pelmeni, fried potatoes with seasoning and sour cream to dip it in, some drinks, vegetables, kielbasa, kind of a wild mix of anything the pub would make her. Russian food had such a distinct smell, it always kind of smelled like cabbage even if there was no cabbage with it. That’s how Maria would describe it anyway.
As the women dug into the food, Natasha could tell that there was a benefit for having Maria around, she had money that she could access from anywhere, she had supplies she could access or request from anywhere, she had connections she could contact for help without raising concern that she was working with Nat, Yelena was right about that, having Maria around did give them some freedom. Natasha could see the benefit. It was a very quiet dinner and Maria and Natasha were still sort of eyeing daggers at each other.
“So, how did you two meet?” Yelena asked trying to get something going.
Maria narrowed her gaze at Yelena’s question.
“At work.” Natasha said quickly.
“And where you worked, that’s normal, a boss dating a subordinate?” Yelena asked and Maria chocked on her sip and had to cover her mouth as she coughed.
Natasha laughed a little to herself.
“Are you okay?” Natasha asked Maria.
“I’m fine.” Maria sighed.
“So it was fine then? No problems at the office?” Yelena tried to act innocent.
“We weren’t together then.” Natasha answered quickly.
“Ohh, okay.”
“We we worked together.” Maria finally added in unprompted with made Yelena smile a bit getting her to engage.
“Yeah, Natasha said that you were an important person.” Yelena started and Maria shook her head no.
“No.”
“Yes you are, you’re with the Avengers, you’re like an integral part of our team.” Natasha corrected quickly.
“You’re an Avenger!? Wait, which one.” Yelena started to study Maria and Maria tilted her head back taken aback from this.
“Okay, wait, is Iron Man really a woman? Because it would be baller if under that suit was you this whole time and everyone just thought it was man.”
“Yeah, I’m the real Iron Man.” Maria rolled her eyes with a little laugh.
“Are you the Hulk?” She asked jokingly.
“Nah, I’m worse than him, when I’m angry you don’t get the warning of me turning green.” Maria snickered and Natasha laughed.
“Did you ever break my sister’s heart?” Yelena asked with a gotcha-style tone and Maria paused.
“Trick question, I don’t have a heart.” Natasha jumped in.
“Me either.” Maria smiled and Natasha and Maria bumped their fists together and Yelena rolled her eyes.
After Yelena stuffed her face with potatoes and dumplings she took a nap on the couch in the room next to the main room. Maria and Natasha had moved to the awkwardly placed queen bed in the living room that Maria questioned if she should sit down on.
“There’s no bugs.” Nat offered to give Maria some ease and Maria sat down next to her.
“When’s the last time you washed this?”
“Great, so tomorrow when we take off you can stay and take everything to the laundry mat for me.” Nat smiled and Maria looked unamused.
“I’m kidding.”
“I don’t know that you were.” Maria looked at Nat skeptically and Natasha sighed.
“That’s a nice jacket.” Natasha said to Maria under her breath changing the subject.
Maria gave Natasha a scowling glance as she believed this was a sarcastic comment.
“It’s mine.”
“Yeah, trust me, I can tell.”
“Oh, so it’s not a nice jacket because it’s not yours?”
“Uhm, slow down, I said it was a nice jacket, and I know it’s not mine because it actually fits you.” Natasha acknowledged.
“I thought you were being sarcastic.”
“Yeah, I just always have that tone in my voice. It’s a nice jacket, but it’s really worn.”
“Because I wear it a lot.”
“It kind of looks like this jacket I had a few years ago….” Natasha smirked.
“It doesn’t look anything like that jacket.” Maria snapped and Natasha laughed.
“‘It doesn’t look anything like that jacket’ she says as she knows exactly which jacket I am talking about.” Nat mocked with a laugh and Maria looked at Natasha unamused but then Maria tried to fake a smile.
“You look well…” Natasha struggled for something to say and Maria raised a brow at her.
“You look like you are on the run.”
“Well, I am.”
“Well, you probably shouldn’t look or act like it.” Maria reminded. Natasha sighed deeply and she scooted herself closer to Maria and Maria looked skeptical.
“Look, thanks for checking on me, and being worried about me and for being someone who genuinely cares about me regardless of the state of our relationship…” Natasha started. “But, I need you—and I know this sucks— but I need you to leave tomorrow.”
“No.”
“Please, you cannot stay here. I can’t I just can’t be responsible for something bad happening to you, you’re too important to me, I.. “ Natasha sighed loudly as it seemed like she struggling for words as she tried to pour her soul out to Maria, acting over the top, her eyes turning glassy. “I love, love you. More than anything, and you cannot be here endangering yourself because of me. I could never live with myself, I couldn’t live here without you, it’s too much.” Natasha said emotionally as if she was getting choked up.
Maria lowered her brow skeptically at Natasha and then as Natasha pretended to pour her heart out Maria started laughing at her.
“… are you laughing…?” Natasha was shocked. Feelings usually made Maria back into a corner and hide.
Maria laughed louder and covered her face, tears were forming in her eyes from laughing.
“I am pouring my heart out to you and you are laughing?!” Natasha asked disgruntled.
Maria calmed herself as she pulled her hands from her face unapologetically.
“This is like a B minus performance at best.” Maria was not phased for one second.
Natasha pressed her lips together and narrowed her gaze glaring at Maria. Maria wasn’t dumb, this was not how Natasha showed her emotions or feelings, they had been together long enough to both know that.
“Did you think you were going to scare me away with your feelings?” Maria asked with a smirk.
Yes Natasha thought to herself, yes she sure did.
“Well, I figured if my feelings don’t work I figured I always had my gun.” Nat joked.
“That probably would have worked better.” Maria shrugged. “If I were you, and I was concerned about time, I’d be using this time to brief me instead of try to run me off.” Maria said with a smirk and Natasha let out a loud huff.
The two were quiet for a minute.
“You’re not going to take no for an answer, are you?” Natasha asked.
“You didn’t.” Maria reminded.
“And that was a mistake.” Nat recalled.
“It saved my life.” Maria pointed out and Natasha made a face.
“It almost got you killed.” Natasha sighed.
“No, Natasha, it almost got you killed.” Maria reminded and then Natasha paused. And she thought about the argument that she and Maria had after Maria took the bullet for Natasha, Maria said it meant nothing, it was just strategic because she was wearing the fabric an Natasha wasn’t. That’s what Maria said when they were fighting.
“It’s too dangerous to try and do these things with people you care about.” Natasha mumbled.
“You don’t care about your sister?”
“I do.”
“You don’t care about Clint or Steve, or even Tony?”
“Of course I do.”
“It’s not different.” Maria rolled her eyes.
“You know it is, that’s why you let May and Woo help you and not me. You called May to help you before you called me— you didn’t call me! I showed up when May called me, now that I remember!” Natasha said like she was holding a grudge from something years ago.
“Oh my god. I didn’t call May, she called me in a moment of crisis and you know what she is closer to me in physical appearance than you and I needed someone who could be me. It was strategic and convenience and not personal!”
“I am not mad that you needed May’s help I am just .. you didn’t want ME to help and now I understand why. You didn’t want me around because you were worried you couldn’t make smart choices and would be clouded by emotion and I get it now.”
“I was wrong.” Maria emphasized and Natasha was taken back because Maria almost never said that — mostly because Natasha never thought she was wrong but Maria thought she was wrong all the time. As Maria recounted it she made mistakes all the time.
“You think when you showed up, you messed me up and almost got me killed, but Natasha, if you didn’t show up I probably would have died.” Maria pointed out and Natasha grumbled.
“You don’t know that you are just speculating.” Natasha cautioned.
“I do know that! I absolutely know that.” Maria said confidently. “And when I was alone, the next time something happened with Yuri, I choked. I was afraid and I was alone and I failed, and you showed up.” Maria explained and Natasha sighed and both Natasha and Maria leaned back on the bed on some pillows laying next to each other.
“Do you want to tell me more about how you ‘love love’ me?” Maria asked sarcastically with a big smirk.
“Oh, shut up.” Natasha grunted and rolled her eyes and Maria laughed and the two of them tilted their heads inward on the pillow they were sharing and looked at each other intimately. Natasha forgot who blue Maria’s eyes were, they were bluer than she ever remembered, each time she saw her it was like she could see different shades of blue.
“Was my acting that bad?” Natasha asked with a little laugh.
“You are rusty, thank god I am here.” Maria mumbled.