Youth

Melina gently jostled her daughter awake, talking in a fast-paced whisper “Natasha, wake up and get dressed, pack everything you can’t live without in your backpack as fast as you can. Anything that doesn’t fit, bring to me.” 

Natasha woke up bleary-eyed, but alert, rubbing the sleep from her eyes “Why, where are we going, where’s Alexei?”

Melina grabbed the Ninja-Turtles-themed school bag that sat on her dresser, unzipping all the pockets and dumping the contents on the floor “No questions Natasha, just pack.”

Natasha hopped out of her bed and stood in front of it, stock still, at attention, still looking confused and scared, “What do you want me to pack?”

Melina stopped her frantic actions to put a hand on her shoulder, pushing herself to ignore the frightened tremble in her daughter’s voice, “Anything you want to keep, your dog, your blanket, your turtle figures, pictures, anything. Everything you leave here, we will never see again. Understand?”

Natasha nodded, finally moving from where she stood over to her bookshelf with all her trinkets, grabbing books and bobbles in her hands with a purpose.

Melina went back to rushing, grabbing two old pink duffle bags from the depths of Natasha's little closet, throwing one on her eldest’s bed and throwing the other on her shoulder. 

She opened the top dresser drawer that had all Natasha’s pants and shirts. “Clothes go in the duffle, at least Four outfits, that means four shirts and four bottoms. Three sets of pajamas, two coats, ten pairs of underwear, ten pairs of socks, and three tank tops, pack anything else you want to, got it?”

Natasha nodded again without looking her way, busy stuffing her plush dog and sunflower blanket into the Ninja Turtle bag.

“Good girl, I need to go help Yelena pack, meet me in the kitchen in twenty minutes, not a second more.”

If this plan was going to work then they all needed to move quickly, their window of time to escape safely was only getting smaller.

Melina left Natasha’s room and went next door to Yelena’s, rousing her a bit more calmly than she had her eldest daughter, she didn’t want the six-year-old to panic, she wasn’t as equipped for such spontaneity as Natasha was.

She pushed her hair back and gently sat her up by her armpits “Lena, sweetheart, wake up.”

Her youngest child looked at her with a slight pout, pawing at her tired eyes and trying to crawl back under the covers “I don’t wanna go to school yet mommy, i’m too sleepy.”

Melina pulled back the covers and put on a practiced smile and a high-pitched voice “No school today baby, we're gonna go on an adventure.”

This seemed to wake her up a bit “An adventure?”

She nodded “Yes baby, but if you want to go you have to play a game first.”

Melina left the spot next to her bed and grabbed her school bag to dump it out like she had Natasha’s. She was suddenly thankful for Yelena’s insistence on getting a bag the same size as Natasha’s when they went school shopping last fall. It was about the same size as Yelena at the time, but now it could fit a lot more than any of the other smaller bags she suggested to her instead.

Yelena yawned “What game?”

Melina then went to her dresser, voice still high-pitched and excited. “You have to pack up all your favorite things into your school bag as fast as you can like everything you leave behind is going to get swept up into the ocean and all the way out to sea! Can you do that?”

Mrelina took advantage of her recent obsession with the little mermaid, hoping the sea metaphor might help Yelena understand why she had to pack everything she loved.

Yelena nodded eagerly, hopping out of bed and bounding across the room “I’ll save my toys from the sea, Mommy!”

Melina let out a nervous laugh, haphazardly packing Yelena’s favorite clothes up into the duffle for her. “Don’t forget your light and your pony Yelena, your book and bracelets too.”

Yelena giggled “I know Mama, I won’t.”

She threw in the last item of clothing and zipped the bag up “If you can’t fit something then bring it to me, okay? Don’t leave it behind.”

The last thing she wanted was for them to be two hours away and for Yelena to cry because she had left something of great importance behind.

Yelena nodded again and kept digging in her meager little toybox for all her favorites

“Mama’s gotta go finish her packing, okay little dove?”

“Okay, Mommy!”

When Melina left the room she ran into Natasha, rocking back and forth on her toes with the bottom of her shirt twisting in her hands, backpack strapped on and the duffle at her feet “I’m done, Mama.”

Melina glanced at her watch, it had barely been six minutes “Are you sure you have everything?”

Natasha nodded like she was reluctant to, eyes cast down to her feet.

Melina narrowed her eyes, the bag didn’t look nearly as full as it should be, she moved her hand under her chin and lifted her head to look her in the eyes “I mean everything baby, don’t leave anything behind, even if you think it's too much.”

Her daughters deserved to have belongings, they deserved to keep everything they loved and cherished. They were people, and people were allowed to have attachments.

With another glance at her things, Natasha scurried back into her room

Melina called after her “Help your sister when you're done, make sure she’s dressed and hasn’t forgotten anything.”

“Okay Mama, I will.”

Melina finally went to her and Alexei’s room down the hall, lifting a few boxes in the back of her closet to uncover her own duffle she had pre-packed with clothes and a new pair of sneakers weeks ago. Her next stop was to the place that held her girls’ most treasured belongings, the bookshelf in the living room that held their photo albums, taking only the two on the far left with only pictures of the three of them and stuffing them in with the clothes.

Over the past six weeks, she had taken out all the pictures in the other albums of her and the girls, knowing Alexei wouldn’t notice their absence until it was too late. She gathered all the ones she didn’t want to keep and burned them with her excess research in what she passed off as a bonfire. 

All those stupid staged photos with empty boxes and faux-smiles, Alexei standing next to them like a disgruntled sergeant next to their terrified platoon. She was more than happy at the sight of Yelena and Natasha toasting marshmallows over those burning images.

The last stop before she met her girls in the kitchen was to the hall closet next to the basement door. The place that held everything she needed to ensure her girls' safety.

 Melina crept towards it slowly, blood turning to ice in her veins the closer she got. She listened intently for any sounds behind the basement door, but much to her relief it was silent. The metal folding chair was still tightly wedged under the door knob and the solo cup of loose nuts and bolts on the top of the chair was still exactly where she left it. 

She opened the closet door and crouched down on her knees, prying up the boards to reveal the stash of things she had been squirreling away since the day the words ‘Returning home soon’ left Alexei’s lips 

Red room files on all four of them, the hard drives, cassettes, and packets containing all the research she had done at Shield, forged IDs, birth certificates, and social security. Two handguns, a white plastic kit with a few chemical weapons of her own invention inside, and finally, folded up in a brown paper lunch sack, eight thousand dollars in cash.

It had taken secretly pawning off all the extra weapons in their cache over the past years and pretending to plan a surprise vacation for Alexei at work just so some of her paycheck was paid to her directly but it was just enough to get away comfortably.

She placed all of it into her bag and fit the floorboards back into place. 

Just as she stood up two sets of little footsteps came bounding towards her, she put the bag over her shoulder and turned right before a fully dressed and awake Yelena, ran into her

“I’m packed Mama, Nattie helped!” Yelena yelled, dodging Natasha’s hands trying to grab onto her.

Melina quickly swept her up into a hug and directed them both towards the kitchen before they could see the chair against the door or the puddle of vomit Alexei had left on the floor when she lured him to the steps.

“I bet you did a very good job little dove.”

Natasha glued herself to Melina’s side “Sorry Mama, I tried to catch her. I packed her bracelets and her light, all the toys I know she’ll miss too.”

Melina caressed the top of her head “Thank you, big girl, did you get everything you wanted in your room too?”

“Yes, Mama, the clothes and my turtles and my stuffed animals, everything. What are we doing?” Natasha asked the last part again with insistence

Melina shook her head and squeezed her hand, signaling for Natasha to stop talking, she glanced at her watch again, fourteen minutes had passed “Good job packing so fast girls, you finished early!”

It was still going to be close, Melina had estimated it would take at most an hour before Alexei’s body had metabolized her extremely scientific solution of booze and an entire bottle of crushed sleeping pills. He would be delirious for a few hours but having to confront him in that state almost scared her more

She led them both into the kitchen where Natasha had placed all of their bags, plus a large, well-loved, stuffed Snoopy that Natasha had won in a school raffle two years ago. She set Yelena on the kitchen island and grabbed the go-bag she hid under the sink.

She did a once over of its contents, a heating pad, a first aid kit, extra bottles of medication, a portable kettle, juice, water, all the girls' favorite snacks, and three boxes of Natasha’s favorite tea. 

Everything was there.

“Okay, Natasha can you help bring everything out to my car?” Melina made sure to specify which car, even though they rarely used Alexei’s pickup truck.

The girl nodded diligently and grabbed two of the bags to haul outside, Yelena squirming off the counter to help too, grabbing her pink and purple backpack and following her sister out the door.

While they loaded their bags Melina made one last trip, grabbing the girl’s toothbrushes and the bag of extra toiletries, giving their rooms one last check to ensure they hadn’t forgotten anything.

When she was satisfied that everything was in order, she grabbed the rest of the bags plus Snoopy, and left in the kitchen following her girls out the door and into the cold night air.

“Wait, Mama!” Natasha ran up to her with a worried expression

Melina halted the key in the lock just before she turned it “What is it, big girl?”

Natasha worried at her lip “Our…our photo albums, I didn’t get them.”

She smiled, turning the key and smoothing the blue locks from her face “They’re in my bag sweet girl, I wouldn’t leave without them.”

Yelena was sitting in the backseat of the car, about to unbuckle herself from the car seat she was sitting in “Mommy I forgot my shoes!”

Melina held the light-up sneakers in her hand for the girl to see. “I got them, Yelena, I wouldn’t want you to leave the house barefoot.”

Yelena giggled “Do we get to go on the adventure now Mama?”

She loaded up all the bags into the trunk of her car, next to an extra survival kit and some blankets. “Yes Yelena, we get to go on our adventure now.” she crouched next to her “But we have to drive a lot first so I want you to take something that will keep you from getting carsick and let you sleep, can you do that?”

She grabbed the bottle of children’s Benadryl from her pocket and put one into her palm, handing it to Yelena with a bottle of grape juice from the kitchen bag. 

Yelena always got carsick for the first few hours of car rides, she bought children’s Benedryl to give her after the little girl threw up on Alexei during a trip to Lake Erie, the man yelled so loud Melina was almost certain he had busted the girl’s eardrums.

Looking over her shoulder to locate Natasha, she found her standing close glaring at her in anger. She pushed herself in front of Melina to intercept the pill on its way into her sister’s mouth 

“Spit that out! You won’t get carsick if you stare out the window Lena, you don’t need it.”

Melina’s lips pinched into a tight frown, “Natasha, you and your sister need sleep, please get in the car.” she gently moved her out of the way and turned her attention back to Yelena “Take the pill, sweetheart, it’ll make the trip go faster.”

“It's okay Nattie, I don’t mind, it’ll make the trip part go faster!” Yelena parroted happily, complying with Melina’s orders instead of her sister’s.

Melina kissed her forehead and shut the door, Natasha still standing next to her with balled fists and dark eyes illuminated only by the porch light. 

She ignored her, her priority was getting them all away from the house as fast as possible “Into the car Natasha, we will talk when Yelena is asleep.”

She got into the front seat, surprised that Natasha opted to sit in the passenger seat instead of next to Yelena. 

She leaned over to whisper to her eldest daughter “Only while it's dark Natasha, I don’t want to be stopped by police.” Melina spoke lowly, turning the ignition and rolling back out of the driveway. 

Natasha shrugged, poorly concealed anger evident on her face. 

Melina put on another faux cheery voice “Off we go, girls!”

As she drove down the street, Melina looked back at the place she had been forced to call home for the past three years, and, for a brief moment, she almost felt sad. That house was no home but it was where she taught Natasha how to ride a bike after hours of teaching herself, where she spent months trying to train Yelena out of pull-ups. 

Ballet lessons in the garage and agility training in the backyard. She was leaving the only place Yelena ever even remembered living and the place where Natasha learned that it was safe to be a child. She had become a mother within those walls. A mother of two bright beautiful girls, girls she would kill and die for before letting them suffer the same fate she had been given in her last lifetime.

That sadness faded from her quickly as it came, being replaced with a new sense in of determination, her girls would make new memories, better ones, realones. They would find a place to call home that wasn’t a glorified prison cell. They would grow up without the fear of their bodies and minds being taken from them. They would be free.