Chapter 10
Many scholars have noted the importance of the alpha male or female to the overall well-being of the jinchuuriki pack, but perhaps even then the significance of this position is not emphasized enough by the literature. The jinchuuriki forms its family around the alpha male/female much as one would raise a tent from a sturdy center pole. In line with this same analogy, loss of the alpha male or female almost always results in the total collapse of the pack and, often, the subsequent deaths of all members. Human scholars have historically struggled to understand how such a relatively minor event, the death of a mate, can produce such devastating results. Indeed, many wonder if the connection is merely coincidental. In this and all cases of jinchuuriki behavior, the important consideration is that, despite their appearance, the demon vessels are not human and do not cleave to the norms of human custom. Jinchuuriki have been known to recover from such a catastrophe and go on to reproduce with another mate, but such instances are exceedingly rare. The loss of the alpha mate, regardless of gender, shatters the integrity of the pack in the same way that loss of the jinchuuriki itself might. Even if we, as scholars, stand incredulous of such a phenomenon, history teaches us the truth of this effect. Kage Tenzou, the first vessel for the great Shukaku, won hundreds of battles only to starve himself to death following the passing of his wife. His subordinates, of course, died with him.
-Koumyuo Sanzo, Lives and Habits of Far Eastern Demons
Neji sat and watched, unable to sleep or train or even read the books Sakura had brought for him several days ago, when she still visited him regularly. Ever since he had kissed Naruto, if anyone could call whatever had happened between them a kiss, the Uzumaki household had given him the space and solitude he had struggled to maintain. His secret purpose was safe, locked tight inside a prison of seclusion and emptiness that was slowly driving him insane. Neji had never been particularly social, preferring his own company rather than the awkward incompetence of others, but this was the first time he had been actively ignored. The others went on, inducting Sai into the strange dance of passion and temperance that was the Uzumaki pack, leaving him to find his own answers. Yuko-san brought his meals and escorted him to the bathes to shower, but the woman seemed to find human speech tiresome and rarely answered his questions with more than a nod. Days had passed and Neji was unsure how many and Naruto still left the sliding doors unlocked as if in open invitation. He could leave. He was not a prisoner. The message could not have been more clear if the jinchuuriki had tattooed the words into his own skin. Neji was free, free to go or to stay or to do nothing at all. He was completely free, except from his own obligations, and the dissonance of it left Neji feeling like screaming. The sentiment was a lie, of course, but apparently he was the only person in the house who thought so. The Hyuuga wondered briefly what would happen if he tore the damned doors off of their maddening, unlocked hinges and crushed them into kindling.
Neji had never failed a mission before, he had never even been accused of being less than excellent at anything, but Anko would have instantly proclaimed his so called marriage to Naruto Uzumaki nothing less than a total failure. The situation was ironic, really, almost funny. No usable information had been gathered and Naruto certainly wasn't pleased in any way that could be considered remotely relevant. He, Neji Hyuuga, had failed and the knowledge was almost enough to make him vomit. The days passed in silence and he wondered why he had ever found conversation to be tiresome. For the first few hours he meditated successfully and almost managed to relax, but the yawning quiet and the knowledge that he might have made a terrible mistake soon disturbed any possibility of martial focus. So Neji sat, and watched the dancing chakra of the others through the walls and tried to quiet the storm in his own spirit.
Sakura had barely moved in the past few days, but Naruto had said that she wasn't really feeling well and so Neji supposed it was to be expected. Sai knelt at her side most days and Neji could not help wonder if the artist was reading to her, or talking or simply just watching her sleep. When Naruto and Sasuke sat against each other on the wide deck outside, Neji found himself trying to guess at what they talked about or if they talked at all. Knowing the two of them, the men might have even been fighting as they sat together in a near embrace. Perhaps when all of them gathered to watch over Sakura they laughed a joked or sat in a tense silence or even wept, there was no way he could know. Neji wanted to know, badly. He wanted to know the small details that the byukugan left absent. He wanted to know what was said and why when Naruto fussed over the girl. He wanted to know whether Sasuke meditated when he stood guard, which was most of the time. Information was missing, critical information that Neji needed so he could understand…so he could… The Hyuuga shook his head and bit his lip to keep the tears at bay. The feeling, the deep seated, agonizing desperation was so unreasonable. He had wanted so much to be left alone and isolated so that he would not have to feel so sick and terrible every time Naruto smiled at him or Sakura laughed. Now, enclosed in this lovely little cage, Neji was safe along with his secrets and the loneliness was almost like torture. Things were happening, important things, far away from his awareness and he was forced to merely watch and wait for something that might never happen. Neji sighed, bathed in the breeze from the damned open doors and focused the byukugan on the burning energies of the others.
Neji had begun to feel recently that the pattern of the others activity had shifted that something important had changed. Naruto paced frequently when he was alone, nervous or perhaps angry, and Sai painted with the frustrated obsession of someone trying to escape their own thoughts. The most worrisome, however, was Sakura. The girl's body was so still, pale green chakra merely a glowing ember kept banked so low that Neji could barely see her. There was something controlled in the terrible restraint of her energy and Neji had the distinct impression that she held her own chi in check, though he could not fathom why. As for Sasuke, the raven haired traitor had not, as far as Neji could tell, slept in days. Sasuke slept little anyway, he had heard Sai say so, but even a ninja needed rest after a while. Neji had the niggling sensation that something was very wrong. If Sakura were more than sick, would Naruto have told him? Neji could not shake the feeling that Sasuke's terrifying insomnia was merely a symptom of something worse, something that had to do with the pink haired beauty and her awful, unnatural stillness. Neji wanted to know, he wanted to know more than he had ever wanted anything in his life, and not because the information would interest Hiashi. He wanted to know because…because if anything happened to Sakura, Naruto would never smile again and Sasuke would be fall into his own darkness and Sai… it hurt to think about.
Suddenly, in what passed for Neji's peripheral vision when using the byukugan, he saw Naruto's energy flare. The scarlet chakra surged in powerful spirals, hot and vast, moving like licking flames around the demon vessel. Neji winced and squinted as the jinchuuriki's chakra glowed and shifted, almost too bright to look at. For a moment, Neji wondered if perhaps the blond was exerting the thrall, but the character of the resonance was different. Sasuke's energy responded to the change, growing brighter, but the perfect, brutal energetic synchrony of the thrall was absent. Whatever was happening, Naruto was not controlling his subordinate so much as he was…heightening the raven's own energy. Neji nearly gasped as a palpable wave of arousal flooded his flesh and his eyes widened. The Hyuuga knew very little about jinchuuriki, but he had at least learned that the vessels sometimes went into a kind of heat.
Before he could contemplate how Naruto had managed to set his nerves tingling with desire without even being in the same room, Neji's attention was pulled to Sakura. The girl's energy had responded to that of her mate as well, but something was terribly wrong. The soft green glow of her chakra was being thwarted, tangled and torn apart, in the purple energy of her unborn baby. Neji gasped. Their chakra…it was incompatible. Suddenly Sakura's long naps and deep meditation and general stillness made sense, too much sense. She had been dampening her chakra, her own fucking lifeforce, in an effort to save her child.
"Kami!" Neji hissed, incredulous.
Such a procedure was no less than a slow form of suicide, at least if it would have been for anyone else, if anyone else could have achieved such control in the first place. A normal ninja, even one with almost perfect discipline, could never have achieved such a low state of energetic sustenance and managed to survive. Sakura, though, was the mate of a jinchuuriki. She had a reserve of energy more vast than Neji could even easily comprehend and so, for a while, she had managed the balance. Now, however, with her husband's demon energy pulling on her own and demanding a response…the balance was gone. The balance was gone and she was dying. Dying right before his eyes…
OoOoOoO
Sai watched, not even blinking, as Sasuke pulled his arm guards on. He looked like a cat fascinated by a fish in a pond and if the artist had had a tail, Sasuke was certain that it would have been twitching. The raven haired ninja blushed, feeling irate. He would never understand what the hell the fascination was with the damn arm covers and why everyone who saw them instantly developed some kind of kink. Naruto had arm guards almost identical to his own and wore them often and no one stared at him like he was a particularly tempting piece of meat. Sakura liked Naruto's arm covers and so did he, but that was in no way the same. Sasuke could practically see Naruto's teeth getting longer as he pulled the steel mesh reinforced stretch silk over his knuckles and up above the elbow. He wasn't used to such rapt attention from anyone except Naruto and now he had both his alpha and Sai staring at him with matching predatory expressions that would have been enough to chase a lesser man out of the room. Sai's eyes were filled with unbidden wanting and a bit of worry, which was gentle enough, but Naruto's blue gaze held only raw lust. Naruto knelt just behind the artist, pausing every now and then to stroke the pale nin's face or squeeze his shoulder, waiting patiently for Sasuke to finish dressing. That in itself was worrisome, Naruto was rarely patient about anything, but the extra flush over the blond's cheeks was even more telling. Truly, he should have known given the time or year. Sasuke practically groaned.
"You're in heat again, aren't you?" He asked snappishly.
"Heat?" Sai asked, confused.
"Hmmm…are you cold?" Naruto replied, licking his lips.
That was answer enough in itself and Sasuke crossed his arms angrily. Perfect. Just exactly what all of them did not need and the timing could not have been any worse. The Jinchuuriki looked a little sheepish, but that didn't stop him from laying a casually possessive hand against Sai's hip. The poor artist gasped and looked like he was about to have a stroke. They hadn't touched intimately since that afternoon in the dojo and Sai still seemed worried about what had happened. As far as Sasuke was concerned, a few tears were fairly minor considering that the artist later told them that he had never even ejaculated before. Nonetheless, Naruto worried and his worrying made Sai worried and soon everyone was uncomfortable. Perhaps it would have been better if Sakura were with them, but she had been very ill for the past few days and certainly not up to anything like trying to familiarize Sai with his own body. Naruto purred heavily and a dark flush spread over Sai's cheeks at the sound.
Sasuke sighed. Every year it was always the same and somehow he always managed to partially forget that the turning of the leaves indicated the beginning of Naruto's heat and the initiation of a sleepless fuckathon that lasted at least three weeks. He was tired already, having found it impossible to sleep with Sakura being so ill. The first time Sasuke had barely noticed the changes associated with Naruto's hormonal issues, except for the fact that the jinchuuriki had been feverish, weak and anorexic. The following year, with the terror of killing his lovers no longer an issue, Naruto had made no effort to resist the effects of the season. If it was possible to die from too little sleep and too much sex, Sasuke was certain he would have succumbed long ago. The jinchuuriki's sexual appetite was tremendous even under normal conditions and in the heat Naruto recovered almost as quickly as he was spent. The blond eyed him, his pupils slitted and dark as the fiery blue gaze roved over Sasuke's body, and the raven felt his flesh respond to the look alone even as the fine hairs on the back of his neck prickled with trepidation. This year the heat would kill him, he was certain of it.
He and Sakura had managed to hold onto relative consciousness last year by taking turns and employing somewhat sneaky methods of getting the blond to release quickly and with very little actual sex. Now with Sakura too ill to even stand and Sai barely able to deal with something as innocuous as a blow job, he would be alone against the sexual onslaught that was Naruto Uzumaki in the fall. Sasuke decided that the almost miraculous healing ability a demon vessel conferred upon its subordinates had a rather distinct evolutionary advantage as otherwise no one would ever survive for more than a single mating season at a time.
"Geez, teme! No need to look so worried!" Naruto exclaimed, running his tongue over the muscular arch of Sai's throat. The ink nin shivered and gasped.
"Leave him alone, you're freaking him out." Sasuke snapped, crossing his arms.
"Hmmm…are you freaked out?" Naruto asked Sai, cupping the ink nin's cheek and turning the man's face to meet his own.
"Um…" The artist managed, eyes wide.
Sasuke rolled his eyes as Sai fumbled, clearly overwhelmed as Naruto licked the artist's lips and engaged him in a deep kiss. Sai's hands clenched into fists and released again, uncertain whether to return the embrace of remain aloof. Naruto pulled the artist close, running his hands boldly over the slender nin's body, his long claws casting shadows against Sai's preternaturally pale skin.
"I thought you said that he needed more time?" Sasuke groused.
"I…I don't know what I need…" Sai panted.
"Maybe he just needs more experience…" The jinchuuriki purred.
"Naruto, put him down. He can't handle you when you're…like this." Sasuke ordered sharply.
With a long sigh, the blond allowed Sai to slide out of his lap, pouting. Sasuke grabbed Sai's shoulder and jerked the ink nin to his feet, impressed despite himself by the smoothness with which Sai responded to the movement and rose to his feet. The artist stood, still flushed and breathing hard, surveying Naruto as one would a rather fascinating animal that may or may not be planning to eat you. The jinchuuriki smiled brightly, a gesture somewhat ruined by the rather prominent fangs, and shrugged in a way that was nearly apologetic…nearly. Perhaps on another day Sasuke could have said something, appealed to Sakura for support or merely pointed out that Sai had broken into actual tears once before, but the cadence of Naruto's breathing and the flush of his face negated any such diplomacy. Sasuke sighed and moved forward only to slide to his knees at Naruto's feet, feeling submissive already just from the scent of the vessel's skin and the way the blond's posture was both active and looming. Naruto's eyes followed him, their movement too directed and serpentine to be human.
"Sai, go check on Neji and make sure he isn't doing anything stupid." Sasuke huffed, resting his hands on Naruto's knees and moving to spread the other's legs.
"But…I know you're tired and Neji never does anything." Sai argued, looking uncertain.
"Go." Sasuke said tightly and the ink nin left the room.
"Sasuke, are you offering yourself to protect him from being overwhelmed?" Naruto whispered, brows drawing together in a worried scowl even as his clawed fingers played over the edge of the raven's jaw.
"Does it matter?" Sasuke breathed, moving to kiss the hardened ridge between the jinchuuriki's legs, mouthing the blond's erection through the thin cotton cloth of his pants.
"Yes." Naruto replied evenly, hooking his fingers under Sasuke's chin and tipping the raven's face up to meet his own.
"I want you…" Sasuke purred.
"And…" Naruto urged, raising an eyebrow.
"…and I am tired." Sasuke confessed, letting his eyes fall closed for just a moment.
"I would never make you do something that you didn't want to, believe it." Naruto hedged.
"Tch, whatever."
"Baka." Naruto said fondly.
"I know what you need and I can handle you. Dobe." Sasuke hissed, mildly annoyed.
"Hmmm, handle me then…" Naruto purred as his pupils expanded to nearly fill his eyes.
Sasuke pushed Naruto's knees wider, moving his mouth boldly over the hardness there even as Naruto wound his deadly fingers into the raven's hair. The jinchuuriki grunted as Sasuke closed his teeth gently over the firm ridge of flesh through the cloth. The fingers in his hair were tight and possessive and Sasuke jerked his head just to test Naruto's grip. The blond rumbled a warning and tightened his hold, moving his other hand down Sasuke's chest to hold his right nipple through the fine mesh of his shirt, fingers firm and hot against the sensitive flesh. Sasuke moaned, suddenly hard and aching. Naruto knew him, knew his body and how to make him feel eager, desperate.
"Teme…I want you…" Naruto growled.
Sasuke said nothing, but moved to undress, sliding the loose pants from his hips and tugging the skin-tight training shirt from his body. The blond followed him, yanking his own clothing away even as he knelt as well. Naruto bracketed Sasuke's hips with his own, running his hands appreciatively over the raven's trembling body. Sasuke gasped, tried to catch his breath as Naruto ran his knuckles over the heated skin of his exposed erection. Biting his lip to keep from moaning again, Sasuke began to tug the arm covers off again, but Naruto stopped him. The blond's hand caressed the exposed curve of his shoulder muscles above the steel and silk, the touch both appreciative and outright sinful.
"Leave them…" Naruto breathed.
"Pervert." Sasuke accused.
The jinchuuriki merely chuckled and moved closer. Suddenly Sasuke was caught in a hot cage of flesh and teeth and burning indigo eyes as Naruto pressed his arm to the small of the raven's back, folding him against his own body. It felt like they drifted slowly, like falling snow, down onto the floor and then Naruto was nudging a knee in between his thighs. The movements were ardent, hurried and a little rough, and Sasuke could feel how much his alpha wanted this, needed this. Naruto moaned above him, face flushed and eyes dark as he lathed his tongue over the quivering planes of Sasuke's chest, sucking his nipples roughly. Sasuke shut his eyes tightly and fought not to scream. The jinchuuriki's skin was so hot, like a fever, the touch of his hands startling and also erotic. Sasuke moaned as Naruto stroked the hardened flesh between his legs, the cool edges of the vessel's claws a strange counterpoint to the heat of his palm. The raven's belly tightened as his alpha ran his long, agile tongue along the underside of the organ, caressing the skin in long, wet strokes.
The touch was almost painful in its intensity, each brush of the blond's tongue like burning coals against his skin. Naruto wanted him wet and aroused and his flesh yielded to the will of the jinchuuriki with the same unquestioning willingness that Gaara's desert moved in the wind. He felt the fluid begin to collect at his tip only to be gathered by Naruto's clever fingers. The raven shuddered as Naruto spread the warm wetness of his own pre-come over their aching bodies, holding their erections together and moving. The rhythm was demanding and the lubricant barely sufficient and Sasuke had to grit his teeth in an effort not to cum. Naruto stroked him, cupped him and reached lower to gently squeeze the heavy weight of his testicles, each touch more thrilling and possessive than the last. Sasuke dug his fingers into the blond's shoulders, nipping his alpha's chin aggressively, relishing the feel of the jinchuuriki's hands against him.
Naruto's teeth teased against the skin just above his arm covers, the razor fangs clicking maddening against the steel mesh of the garments. Sasuke moaned and arched up against Naruto, helpless to resist him, the feel of the jinchuuriki's muscular hips moving between his legs both sensual and terrifying. In moments like these Sasuke could sense the power in Naruto's body and it made him feel fragile and vulnerable, as if Naruto could shatter him with less than a breath. Sasuke was a strong person, a warrior undefeated in battle, and yet the blond could make him feel this way…he was the only one who could make him feel this way.
Naruto produced a vial of oil apparently out of thin air and before Sasuke could breathe or even think, he felt the jinchuuriki's strong fingers pressing against him, massaging his most intimate flesh and seeking entrance. Sasuke yelped, and tried to still the deep, visceral quivering that settled into his flesh at the touch.
"Relax." Naruto snarled and the thrall pounded through Sasuke's nerves.
"Oh…Oh FUCK!" Sasuke roared.
He screamed as pleasure more intense than anything merely physical forged through his flesh and his body became loose and open for Naruto's hand. Sasuke tried to breathe, tried to stop screaming, as the burning pleasure ricocheted through his heated flesh and sent spearing darts deep into his soul. Naruto pressed in with two fingers, purring in approval as Sasuke's body yielded to him like cold honey melting before a flame. The deep, visceral ache of penetration filled Sasuke's flesh and he was full with only the blond's fingers inside him, but the thundering roar of the thrall made the discomfort seem minor and very far away. Naruto stroked him, opening the tender flesh carefully, finding the tingling nerves within and pressing. Sasuke was not sure if he had cum or if he even could, if there even existed a higher peak to reach.
"Oh Kami! Sasuke! You feel so good, so good…" Naruto was murmuring against his throat, voice rough and husky with lust.
Sasuke moaned and gasped as Naruto removed his fingers and pushed in with a single fluid thrust. The jinchuuriki rocked him, holding his hips tight to his own, thrusting deep and hitting Sasuke's prostate again. The tatami was rubbing the skin off of his shoulders and Naruto's teeth were deep in the muscle of his shoulder and Sasuke didn't care. He moaned and trembled and angled his hips so that Naruto could penetrate him more deeply, nipping his alpha's lips until Naruto's mouth was coated with blood. The blood was pretty, like lipstick, only better and Sasuke couldn't concentrate enough to feel guilty about how completely sick that sentiment was. He couldn't do anything, held tight in Naruto's inhumanly powerful grip, but moan and writhe and cum with enough force that he saw stars.
Naruto moved once and then again before tensing and releasing his heat deep into Sasuke's tingling body. The jinchuuriki gasped and shuddered, breathing hard. For a moment only the effort of bringing air into his lungs and exhaling it again dominated Sasuke's thinking. Naruto nuzzled his cheek and Sasuke could feel him hardening again. He groaned. Suddenly, Naruto stilled in the way that only a jinchuuriki can, completely so that not even his pulse seemed to move. The blond, crouched low over him and growled, eyes fixed like blue coals on the door. Sasuke felt disoriented and it wasn't until his own pulse stopped pounding in his ears that the raven was able to hear what Naruto was listening to: the crashing thump echoing through the house.
OoOoOoO
Sai had barely had removed the seal from the door before Neji was barreling out of the room, moving like a hurricane. Sai might have asked why the Hyuuga had such an urgent need to leave the room where he had secluded himself for the better part of a month, but he could not seem to find the words. Sai moved before he could think, his body moving to intercept the other ninja without any kidn of conscious effort. Neji snarled and tried to move around Sai's stance. The artist blocked him, but the Hyuuga easily dodged around him and shot down the hall. Neji was good, very fast and very capable, but he had not managed more than a few feet before the artist turned with a snap on his toes and brought his elbow down hard onto Neji's shoulder. The Hyuuga responded by ducking with the momentum of the blow, only to rise up in a fury of perfectly aimed kicks and flying fists. Sai caught most of the blows, but the other ninja was unbelievably fast. Neji caught Sai with a snapping twist of his first two fingers in the thigh and suddenly the artist's entire leg was numb and unbalanced, the chi to the limb completely blocked. The ink nin ignored the pain, considerable though it was, and used his weight to throw both of them to the floor. Neji spun towards him, fingers held firm in preparation for another devastating strike. The artist dodged and closed quickly, trying to force the mahogany haired ninja into a hold and slamming his face brutally against the wooden post of the hallway.
Neji grunted with the force of the blow, and re-positioned his body to throw Sai over his head and into the unyielding wood of the floor. The air thumped out of Sai's lungs in a single, painful burst, but the ink nin still managed to lock Neji's torso in a bone breaking knee hold. The Hyuuga hissed as Sai broke one of his ribs, the crack of the bone loud and obscene in the cultured grace of Sakura's home. Neji responded by punching Sai soundly in the face. They grappled desperately, nearly matched for strength and for speed, rolling in a snarling tangle on the floor. Sai threaded his arms between Neji's even as the other ninja tried to writhe out of his grasp and jerked. Hissing, Neji relaxed his shoulders and narrowly escaped having the joints dislocated. He thrust with his hips and Sai was suddenly caught beneath Neji's body, fighting hard to protect his throat. Neji however, did not spend the time in an attempt to choke him out and lunged forward. Sai thrust the heel of his hand upward, nearly connecting with the Hyuuga's solar plexus even as Neji rolled to the side. Sai pursued him, crashing hard into the opposing wall.
The splintering crack of breaking wood resounded around them as Sai grabbed Neji by the hair and slammed his skull into the wall. Blood gushed generously from the wound in the Hyuuga's scalp and Sai had to pause to spit blood from his own mouth, but neither man was finished by far. Though badly stunned, the Hyuuga still fought well and kicked Sai smoothly in the side, throwing him to the floor. The artist gasped as the air was forced in a burning rush out of his diaphragm, but moved with the force of the strike to spin a kick hard into Neji's knee. Neji folded his body in a graceful dive and took the hit on the muscle of his thigh, sparing the joint, and lunging forward to engage the ink nin again. Neji brought his knee up and into Sai's chest with a terrible crack of breaking bones even as the artist leapt to avoid the full force of the strike. Sai locked his legs around Neji's knees and twisted, sending the Hyuuga sprawling onto the floor again. They grappled, blood smearing across the polished wood of the floor.
"Let me go!" Neji snarled.
"Where are you going?" Sai asked blankly as he moved to strike the Hyuuga in the throat.
Neji dodged the strike neatly and moved to punch the artist again, but Sai blocked the blow against his forearm. For the next few breaths Sai moved on the defensive, evading Neji's attacks or blocking as the Hyuuga became a veritable tornado of movement. The artist pulled a kunai from his belt and flung the weapon into the Hyuuga's face, his ability to dodge badly hampered by his dead leg. Neji avoided the weapon and tried again to run down the hallway. Sai tripped him hard.
"Sakura! I have to get to her!" Neji screamed, kicking free.
"Sakura is not feeling well. Leave her alone." Sai said, finally sounding almost annoyed.
"No! You don't UNDERSTAND!" Neji shrieked.
"WHAT in the HELL is going on!" Naruto roared, suddenly looming above them in all his naked, and considerably furious, glory.
Sai said nothing, but allowed Neji to wriggle out of his grasp and stand as the blond vessel glared at them with his fangs bared and claws extended. Naruto was still half hard, bleeding sluggishly from where Sasuke had bitten him, and Sai felt his skin flush at the sight. Neji met Naruto's eyes haughtily, using his greater height to put more force behind the look, but Sasuke flung him to his knees in a movement too fast to follow.
"Tell me why I shouldn't kill you…" The raven hissed.
"Sasuke!" Naruto barked and the dark haired killer crossed his arms and moved to the side.
Naruto tipped Neji's chin and forced the Hyuuga to meet his eyes. The muscles in Neji's jaw works as the Hyuuga clenched his teeth and Sai prepared to spring again if he tried to fight them. There was a moment of tension and Neji dropped his eyes under the onslaught of burning blue that was the jinchuuriki's glare. Sasuke made an approving noise behind him, kimono still in rumpled folds around his hips, sharingan blazing angry scarlet. The Hyuuga blushed hotly as Naruto crossed his arms.
"You don't understand…" Neji growled.
"Then explain." Naruto snarled.
"Please. I have to go. Sakura is dying." Neji whispered urgently and Sai felt the very plasma go still in his veins.
OoOoOoO
"You must fix her." Sai stated, staring levelly at the Hokage.
Tsunade sighed and closed the folder of reports she had been half-heartedly reading. The ink nin stood before her dressed in a new and obviously custom made set of the Uzumaki livery, his expression as blank as always. Sasuke and Naruto had reported to her that Sakura's health had continued to fluctuate, that the girl still experienced spells of sickness, but thus far she had always recovered quickly. Now, apparently, the newest member of the Uzumaki household had come to the conclusion that her favorite student was in danger.
"Sai, does Naruto know you are here?" Tsunade asked pointedly.
"No." The ink nin replied blandly.
"And why not?" Tsunade asked.
"Naruto has to stay home and make sure that Sasuke and Neji don't kill each other. I have finished my training for the day and I have the time." Sai reported, his face utterly impassive.
"Fine, but you're wasting it. I have done all that I can for Sakura at this point. Naruto says that she has been doing better…"
"Something has changed." Sai said, moving closer.
"What?"
"I don't know. She won't tell me, but her breathing is different and I can tell that she is in pain. She has been sick this time for much longer and Sasuke won't sleep. She cannot go on like this." Sai said, his nearness bringing an intensity to the words that his intonation did not.
"That is somewhat to be expected. She is trying to dampen her own chakra so that her energy won't reject that of the child's." Tsunade explained.
"She is dying." Sai said.
"Sai, isn't that a bit melodramatic?"
"Her kidneys have ceased to function optimally." He argued.
"How do you know that?" Tsunade asked, raising an eyebrow.
"I can smell it on her, the smell of the creatinine in her blood. I've smelled it since yesterday." Sai replied.
"Surely Naruto can smell it too and I can't imagine that he wouldn't have said something…"
"He smells it, but he doesn't know what it is or what it means. He had never seen someone die that way." Sai replied.
"Sai, Sakura is not dying." Tsunade snapped.
"She is."
"If she were, then the child would have been miscarried by now!" Tsunade argued.
"The child has no knowledge of it's mother or her pain. It is only a life. It wants to live and that is all. It will kill her to survive." Sai said coldly.
"That is a very inappropriate way to talk about a baby!" Tsunade snapped. Sai blinked.
"That's just how life is. Life wants to live." Sai replied shrugging.
"Sai, that opinion might have been forced on you by Danzo, but you of all people should know that it is much more complicated than that." Tsunade practically snarled.
"I know that. Don't misunderstand me, I want our baby, I want to see her and hold her and I want Sakura to be happy, but you have to help her or she will die." Sai stated again.
"The problem is that even if you are right, there isn't anything I can do! The energy just isn't compatible and there is no way anyone has ever found in medicine to make a square peg fit into a round hole!" Tsunade said.
"But, we need her…" Sai argued, sounding very young.
"This is Sakura's body we are talking about and it is her right to say what she is willing to do with it." Tsunade said, rubbing her brow.
"And so, if the only way for Sakura to live was for the baby to die…" Sai said, suddenly looking ashen in the sunlight slanting through Tsunade's office.
"Then Sakura would choose and you and I both know what her choice would be." The Hokage said and tried to ignore the sick feeling that tightened her gut.
OoOoOoO
Sakura focused on the ceiling and counted backwards from a hundred, saying the numbers out loud to help her finish the set, trying to keep her heartbeat slow and steady. She had barely even managed to get half-way through the exercise when another wave of nausea hit, this one accompanied by sharp, deep stabbing pain in the large muscles of her chest and abdomen. She groaned. The child had grown and her chakra had grown with her and the kunoichi had lost the balance between the two again. Sakura wretched hard, clenching her teeth together and resisting the temptation to flare her own chakra as her body jerked with the force of it. The sickness would pass as it had before, with concentration and deep meditation, and everything would be fine. Naruto and Sasuke knew she was sick and they worried, worried more than enough without her screaming, worried too much already. Sakura was tired of seeing the shadows on their faces from nights spent watching her try to relax, helpless to do anything, but wait and dote and wait some more. Her illness was taking a terrible toll on Sasuke and Sakura knew that the raven had not slept for more than three days, ever since the beginning of this most recent bout of nausea. Before, the sickness and pain had only lasted as long as it took for Sakura to master her own energy and meditate, but now…she shut her eyes and tried to breathe. The creaking of the sliding door opening was like broken glass against her nerves, but the girl held onto her silence as a drowning sailor might a sturdy piece of wood. It would pass, it had to pass, she just had to hold on a little longer.
"Sakura…" Sai's soft, flat voice carried through the thick air of the bedroom.
"I'm awake." She replied, hating the way her voice sounded so weak and tired.
The ink nin came and knelt beside her, as smooth and graceful as one of his own brushstrokes, feet barely a whisper on the tatami. Sai's face was a paper-pale blank, but Sakura knew from the set of his shoulders and the position of his body that the artist was deeply upset. The girl extended her hand to him and Sai caught her fingers in a snap, the movement too quick and too eager. He brushed her knuckles reverently against his lips and Sakura sighed at the silken feel of the light kiss.
"Sai are you going to tell me what's wrong or do I have to guess?" Sakura said, managing a smile for him.
"Please…please don't die." The artist whispered.
"I'm not dying. It's just the same as it was before…" Sakura said, rolling her eyes.
"Liar." He hissed.
"Sai…"
"I…I can see it on you. Please…" Sai begged, his slate black eyes full and filled with terror.
"Baby, you are worrying over nothing…" Sakura laughed a little.
"Then get up and fight me, show me that I'm being stupid, just like you used to." He whispered miserably.
"You know I can't…"
"I do know. I know what you are hiding from the others." Sai said.
"I'll be fine." Sakura snarled and tried to believe it.
"When…when I was in Root, one of the girls chose to drink the cyanide offered instead of killing her opponent in the match. They were friends I guess, but that wasn't allowed. She took the cyanide and smiled about it and I thought she was stupid…"
"Root was a very weird, very bad place and it has nothing to do with…"
"That was the choice, you see, to kill or to die yourself because survival was the only thing that mattered to us back then. I watched her. I shouldn't have, but I…she did not die quickly…she kept saying that she was fine…" Sai whispered, the muscles in his jaw working beneath the pale smoothness of his skin.
"Sai, this is nothing at all the same. I'm not dying of poison…"
"Yes! Yes you ARE!" The artist shouted, his usually flat eyes suddenly filled with fear.
Sakura was taken aback by the sheer power of the raw emotion in his words, emotion that she had never before seen from the ink nin, not even in the most dire situations. Sai shivered, staring hard at the floor, trying to regain his control. The girl's eyes were wide with shock, but she managed to keep her hand still in his trembling fingers. She managed to wait and say nothing even though if he had been anyone else she would have been up in a heartbeat, she would have been angry, if only she still had the energy.
"Sakura, I…I'm not sure I can survive without you." He whispered, black eyes startled and miserable.
"Sai, I am not going to die." Sakura whispered, stroking his knuckles with her thumb.
The artist closed his eyes, savoring the touch. He nuzzled her hand, cool lips desperate and hungry as he kissed the captive flesh. Sai had been so different ever since Naruto had engaged him sexually, so much more unstable and yet more alive. Sakura wondered if they had moved to quickly, if Sasuke and Naruto had unlocked a pandora's box of terrifying psychological pain by melting the ink nin's composure. Pain that no one had ever seen and no one could comprehend.
"The child…the child is the poison and it is exactly the same. It's killing you, slowly, cell by cell, bit by bit…" Sai asserted.
"Sai, say that again and you will regret it." Sakura hissed, her voice low and full of menace.
"It's the truth. Your daughter is killing you. Just by growing, just by living, she is ending you…" He whispered.
"Enough!" Sakura snapped and he flinched at her tone.
"Every time you get sick it's worse and then you control it for a while, beat the poison back, but it's inside of you. I have seen this before and I know how it will end, but I just…I can't…I can't…" Sai moved to hold her, gripping her closely, his hands shaking hard.
"It isn't the same. You're getting upset over nothing." Sakura said, her voice hard.
"Am I?" Sai asked her and Sakura bit her lip.
"Honey, you're just scared. Everything will be okay, I'll be okay…" Sakura said, kissing his hair and trying to soothe him.
"Just like the cyanide. You can wall it up and for a while people will hope, but the killer is still there…" Sai said, holding her shoulders so tightly that Sakura knew she would have bruises.
"Sai, you are acting very strange." Sakura said, shoving him a little.
"I know."
"Well stop it!" Sakura snapped.
"I love you." He said, as if it were just the truth, as if he were saying that fire was hot.
"I know, but you can't get so worried. You're even worse than Sasuke!" She sighed.
"Sasuke worries because he sees what is happening to your chakra, he knows how sick you really are, but there is nothing he can do." Sai replied.
Sakura was silent. No matter how much she wanted to deny it, what Sai said was at least partially true. She was very sick, very weak, more than she had ever been in her life. Her chakra was tangled with that of her baby, strands being cut and torn away as the little life struggled not to suffocate within her. Her body was at war, but Sakura had been to war many times and she had always returned. This time would be no different. She would be fine. Their daughter would be fine.
"Sai, come here." Sakura ordered, moving so that he could lie down beside her.
The ink nin obeyed her, moving to curl around her body just as he used to when they were only teammates trying to endure the cold on a long, distant mission. Sakura sighed as the warmth of his flesh eased the pain in her back and belly, moving her hand up and behind to stroke the silken soft strands of his black hair. Sai moved against her, trying to get closer, kissing the nape of her neck in a way that might have been sweet, but was really almost desperate. Sakura lay against him and breathed and enjoyed the affection, trying to think what she could possibly say to him. Sai's hand drifted down from where he held her shoulders to rest against her belly, stroking the roundness there.
"You're right. I'm really sick, but I'm going to get better. I won't die." She whispered.
"If you leave us…we won't survive without you." Sai replied.
"You'll be fine, everything will be fine…" Sakura argued.
"If you were your own doctor, what would you say?" He asked, mouth a hard line against her shoulder.
Sakura swallowed and bit her lip. Truly he could not have asked a more awful question. Sakura shuddered as the first hot tears leaked out from beneath her tightly closed eyelids. Oh Kami, he knew and she had been so careful…how could he know? Sai knew about the small, terrible things that she had chosen to ignore and hide from the others. If she was the surgeon now instead of the patient, she would have said that her vital organs were inflamed and that her muscles were beginning to break down, leaking creatinine into her plasma. She would have used words like 'critical' and 'hypovolemia', words that meant placement in the ICU for any patient given such a sentence. Truthfully, perhaps she wouldn't have said anything, just ordered her anesthesiologist to gas the patient and prepare for emergency C-section. She would have said that it was hopeless and that it was better to save one life than lose both but…it was her baby.
"Sai…don't tell Naruto." She whispered.
"Even if I did, there is nothing he can do. Sasuke knows this also." Sai said and his voice was harsh and ragged.
"You just…you just have to trust me." Sakura said, her hands shaking where she twined her fingers with his against her shoulder.
"I want our baby, I want to hold her and play with her and…" He took a breath and suddenly Sakura had a terrible feeling about this conversation.
"Sai…"
"I want to see what she will be like, but…I won't let her kill you." He whispered and his normally flat voice was cold and too firm.
"Sai…it isn't like that…" She whispered, feeling a deep rush of panic as his hand stilled against her womb.
"It is." The artist said.
"No…please, give me more time…" She begged as his grip on her body tightened like the slow embrace of a python, deadly and inescapable.
"I love you. I love you too much to stand aside and do nothing." Sai said and his voice finally cracked with the emotion.
"I know…I know, but if you hurt her…" Sakura gasped, looking at where his right hand lay against her, still and taught.
His hand, his beautiful, deadly hand was tense and ready. He was ready to strike and in a single swift, perfect blow their baby would be gone. Sakura knew him too well, knew that he was still hesitating and that if she screamed or called for the others that their daughter would be gone before she could even breathe. Sai could do it, too easily, and he thought that he had to.
"I won't hurt her. She won't even feel anything, it will be very fast…" He whispered and Sakura struggled against him, but it was useless.
"Sai, you can't do this…she…she isn't even yours!" Sakura hissed as his hand flexed and formed into a blade, fingers straight and solid.
"I know and that's why I'm the only one who can, Naruto can't bear to choose and Neji won't intervene and Sasuke…Sasuke would never do anything to jeopardize your love. I want you to live…even if you hate me." He said and sobbed and prepared to strike.
"Please Sai, please…I'm begging you!" She whispered.
"You are our home Sakura, you have to know…without you we'll all be lost again and the baby will die anyway…Don't worry, it won't hurt much." He said and she could feel his muscles gathering.
"Sai! If you kill my daughter then I'll never forgive you!" She wailed.
"I don't deserve your forgiveness…"
"You have to give me more time, you have to let me try! What if there was a way and you didn't know! What if you killed her for nothing! For NOTHING!" Sakura shouted, shaking.
"A way…?" The artist faltered, his hand still in the air above her belly.
"Yes! Yes a way! A way for us both to live! There's still a chance…" Sakura argued urgently.
"Tsunade said…" Sai hedged.
"Tsunade doesn't know everything!"
"But…Even if there is and I wait and then it's too late…I can't…I can't…"
"You have to let me try. You have to believe in me, if you don't then…then you never really loved me at all." Sakura whispered urgently and the words were poison in her own ears.
"Sakura…I do love you." Sai moaned, his voice broken.
"Then wait. I'll find a way, I promise." She said, gripping his hand against her shoulder hard and breathing a sigh of relief as he finally relaxed against her spine..
"I'll give you time, but I won't let you die. I won't." He asserted, voice still low and chilly even with the tears, and Sakura knew it was an oath.
"Just give me a little more time, baby, and I'll save us. I promise." Sakura said, shaking, as she kissed Sai's knuckles.