Switched

Tsunade sighs, she could not stop thinking of the dimension hoppers she had met earlier that week. Something about the cloaked figures struck a cord in her. She lets out a breath and strengthens her resolve.

“Fetch me Jiraiya!” She barks at a passing chunnin. The chunnin nods fearfully and scrambles to do as commanded.

While she waits for teammate her mind wanders to the three that painfully reminded her of her team during their younger days. From what she glimpsed from their interactions they had a strong bond.

‘That could have been us,’ she thinks, ‘if only we-’

“You called?” Jiraiya interrupts her thoughts.

Shaking away her thoughts she nods.

“Yes. I need you to go to that inn and tell them I’m ready for that meeting,” She says handing him the slip of paper Obito’s wife gave him.

Jiraiya nods and jumps out the window, dodging the paperweight Tsunade throws at him.

“STOP USING MY WINDOWS AS DOORS!” She screams. Calming down she links her hands in front of her and waits for the familiar strangers.

Soon enough there is a knocking at her doors. At her beckoning a cloaked head pops in.

“You called for us Tsunade-sama?” Obito’s voice comes from the head.

“Yes, it’s about time I heard your story. But first I need the rest of your group to reveal themselves,” she answers.

“May I request that team seven be called in. This may affect them,” Obito’s wife and assumed right hand requests, “Of course they don’t need to be here right away.” Tsunade narrows her eyes at the figure.

“I don’t know what you’re up to, but I’ll agree,” Tsunade relents. She sends another frightened chunnin to get team seven.

There is a moment of silence as Tsunade studies the cloaked figures. The ones that remind her of her team are sprawled on her floor idly chatting. Tsunade twitches when she notices their cloaks are still somehow hiding their faces from her no matter how they move.

The tallest of the three was half-sitting and half-lying on the floor, he was barely keeping himself in the position due to his shoulders and part of his upper back being pressed to the wall; his arms are wrapped around his assumed teammates. Tsunade notices that the position doesn’t look too healthy, it’s putting his head in a strange position that cannot be healthy for his neck.

Perched on the tallest’s crossed legs sits the smaller figure his arms wildly waving around as he talks. The quiet one sits leaning against the wall next to the taller figure as they both nod and agree with the smaller figure. Tsunade smiles softly at their interactions and turns to Obito to begin the meeting.Her eye twitches at the scene the other two have made. Obito’s wife was sitting in a chair that was not there earlier, they were reading a book she doesn’t recognize. Now, that’s somewhat normal except for the chair thing. No, the thing that makes her twitch is the grown ass man draped over his wife who was coolly ignoring the ramblings of their husband.

Tsunade sighs but a sudden thought comes to her and she sits up sharply, she studies the reading figure from the familiar slouch (even if it’s from the weight of Obito), to the professional way they ignore Obito’s rambling, and the book she suspects should not be out in public. Putting the pieces together she cackles hard and loud. Jiraiya who was looking at her since she sighed looks at her in alarm and worry.

“I-I think I figures out who his wife is!” She whispers with difficulty. She beckons Jiraiya.

Jiraiya nears and leans down, she gleefully whispers into his ear through her laughter. Jiraiya chokes, this causes Obito’s wife to look up from their book.
“Hm… Did something happen?” they drawl in an unbearably bored tone, the book still in front of the general area of their face.

“O-Oh God!” Jiraiya gasp, “You might be right Hime!” He moans dramatically, “what would Minato say if he found out his precious student was corrupted in this way.”

“Minato-sensei was enthusiastically supportive of us, he was more excited than us for our wedding. Plus, you big hypocrite we know about your thing for Tsunade AND Orochimaru. So, HA!” Obito argues. Tsunade looks at Jiraiya with a raised eyebrow and a smirk, he blushes darkly at her smirk.

“Ha-ha! Ero-sannin got owned!” comes from the three on the ground. Obito’s wife ignores the chaos and turns to Tsunade.
“Tsunade-sama, are we starting?” he asks.

“Might as well,” she says as they all settle down, Jiraiya still lightly blushing. She goes through the motions of activating the privacy seals.

“Kids?” the figure still under Obito prompts.

“Yes sensei,” they say in unison. They swiftly prepare a jutsu, Jiraiya and Tsunade stiffen slightly reaching for their weapons.

“This will get rid of any unauthorized listening seals,” the figures placate. At their hesitant nods they activate the jutsu at the same time.

Tsunade relaxes when the jutsu causes no harm but she does registers the large amount of small pops that fill the room. “I’ll need that jutsu,” she whispers to herself and Jiraiya who nods in agreement.

“Now that everything is settled, time for introductions,” Tsunade smiles with a clap of her hands.

Obito straightens up. “I mean since you guys know who I am and suspect who my wife is we’ll go first, he says. “My name is Uchiha Obito and I’m the fifth Hokage of my dimension.” He pulls down his hood.

“How are you even alive?” Jiraiya asks.

“I don’t actually remember much but Rin told me what happened,” Obito says as he lays an arm around his wife who was clutching his book.

“She told me that after they left me in the cave they were attacked. I guess something in Kakashi snapped because according to her he started to tear throats out with his bare hands and when he lost his mask with his teeth, which to be honest is fucking bad ass. After the enemy was dead or on their way to death Kakashi dug me out with his bare hands and with the help of his dogs.” As he says this Obito grabs his wife’s gloved hands, “He fucked his hands up really bad just to save a half-dead idiot.”

“Obito… I’m fine, I did it because I love you and we’re both alive. That’s all I ever wanted. We’re fine now, we healed up just fine,” Kakashi says softly, standing up to cup Obito’s face. Tsunade’s eyes soften at the tender moment, Jiraiya kind of looks to the side awkwardly.

Obito, not looking away from his cloaked wife, gives a shuddering breath. “When sensei got there Kakashi was heavily bleeding but cradling me in his arms as Rin did her best to keep me alive. He had someone else finish the mission while he rushed all of us back to Konoha.”

He grins sheepishly. “To be honest all I remember from all that, was a beautiful angel over me,” Obito smiles softly at Kakashi and looks up at the sannin, who smile at him.

“I can guess who you are, but I still want to hear it. Who might you be?” Tsunade asks Kakashi.

Lowering his hood, he says, “Uchiha Kakashi or Hatake Kakashi, depending on who you ask. Sometimes it’s Uchiha-Hatake.”

“I have a question. How are you his wife if you’re a man?” Tsunade asks.

“I don’t care what they call me. Most people call me his wife because Obito’s the one who introduces me as that, though some people do call me his husband. I just have no preference. If it makes you uncomfortable you can use husband, I won’t get offended or anything,” he says while reading his book. Tsunade nods in understanding.

“I have a question too. I thought that Obito liked that Rin-girl, so how did this-” he waves at them, “happen?”

“I mean, I did but during our long term stay in the hospital Rin came out to us as a lesbian. She even introduced us to her girlfriend, Anko. So, I got over my childish crush and fell in love. Later she introduced us to Anko’s boyfriend, Iruka. According to Rin, Anko is Polyamorous,” Obito says with a grin.

“OBITO! Please stop talking,” One of the figures whines, “Kakashi-sensei, when are we gonna introduce ourselves!”

“Now would be good, my cute little students,” He says as Obito wilts.

“Alright!” he yells as he jumps off the tallest’s lap. Kakashi chuckles and shakes his head.