Chapter 2
“I still can’t believe it!” Deidara started once they reached his personal hideout of sorts.
Hidan was looking around, acting like he was more focused on their environment rather than whatever the blonde was saying. It was pretty out there: a nice lake and trees surrounding the small field they were standing in. If anyone else were to find out about it they would want to hang out here all of the time, that much was for certain, no wonder Dei had been keeping it a secret for as long as he could. Good thing he trusted Hidan – for whatever reason.
“We all really thought you and Kakuzu had a thing for each other, yeah!” Deidara kept talking, not even really caring if Hidan was listening or not. Luckily for him that phrase made Hidan angry enough to pay attention. It wasn’t like he was offended that everyone thought that, after all Kakuzu was a good looking man, but if he said they weren’t together than they weren’t together damn it!
“Everyone keeps fucking saying that and we keep fucking tell you guys you’re wrong! Just because we fucked /once/ doesn’t mean we’re fucking in love or some shit-!”
Hidan realized what he just said a moment too late as he watched Deidara’s face go from confusion to surprise-
“Wait- you guys had sex!? When-??”
“Fuckin’ damn it- a while ago, okay? We were both horny or some shit so we fucked but it didn’t mean anything. It was a one time thing. And don’t you dare fucking tell anyone-“
“Why would I /ever/ do that, Hidan?”
“Deidara- I fucking swear to Jashin if you tell anyone-“
“Calm down, yeah? I’m more interested in you and Danna now.”
“There is no me and Sasori- I fucking like him, that’s it.”
“That’s not it! I want details!”
“What details? We hung out a few times, I got a fucking school-girl crush on him and now we hang out without him knowing how hot I think he is. See? No details.”
“Hiiiiidaaaaaan!” Deidara knew there had to be more to it than just that. No way did Hidan, Mr. I’m not gay, have a crush on Sasori that easily without any of them noticing. His attraction to Kakuzu was apparent to everyone after all!
“What!?”
“There has to be more to it than that! How’d you realize you like him? Why do you like him? What would you do if he liked you back? Would you go out with him??”
“Holy shit- what’s up with the fucking interrogation?? I like him. Can’t we leave it at that? You’re lucky I’m even fucking telling you.”
“And you’re lucky I don’t tell him, yeah?”
“Don’t you fucking dare.”
“Then tell me some details!”
“Fine! I don’t know how it fucking happened, okay? We were just hanging out, we just fucking hang out and I realized how much I loved it and eventually realized it was because of him- Like, I like hanging out with you but with him it’s just? I don’t know-It’s just fucking different, better I guess? And I mean- I don’t fucking know why I like him he’s just- he’s hot and not as fucking annoying or stupid as everyone else here and he listens to me- sometimes, I mean sometimes I don’t fucking shut up and he tells me to shut up but if it’s important he’ll listen and we have fun when we hang out and fuck, I don’t know he’s just? Great??”
“Wow, you have it really bad, don’t you?”
“Shut the fuck up-“
“Does that mean you would date him if he liked you too?” He asked, completely ignoring Hidan. He was no about to let this go anytime soon. When else would he ever get to see Hidan fawn over someone that wasn’t just his usual ‘Dude, look at her fucking tits-‘ stuff he pulled at bars?
“Yeah- I mean, why not? But he doesn’t fucking like me. We’re just friends.”
“You like him.”
“And?”
“You’re still his friend. He could like you back, yeah!”
“I’m not gong to fucking ask him out, Dei.”
“Of course not, he’s gonna ask you out.”
“Why the hell would he do that?”
“Because I have a plan, un.”
“Hell no- I’m not letting you fucking meddle in this. We are fine with how things are thank you very much.”
“But Hida-“
“No! It’s bad enough that someone knows about it I don’t fucking need you to fuck with things on top of that!”
Deidara pouted but still agreed. It wasn’t like he had to tell the truth to Hidan after all. It didn’t matter what the Jashinist said to him or threatened him with, Dei was determined to at least try to get those two together. After seeing how clearly smitten Hidan was how could Deidara not meddle? Of course, with Hidan not being a part of his plan things would get a bit trickier but he did know of someone that would be willing to help, even if he was a complete idiot. As long as he didn’t tell Tobi any details then he shouldn’t be able to mess things up that badly.