Zombies

The car ride was relatively silent for awhile, Hidan starring out the window as they neared the state of Illinois. He's been here once as a child, when his uncle died. He was the only one who didn't cry. Not a single tear slipping out his eye, and he didn't expect tears to come out either.

"How far are we? " Hidan broke the silence between them, the song playing was Me, Myself and I.

"Three hours or so. "

"I'm bored. "

"Okay. What do you want me to do about it? "

"Get there faster. "

"Ugh. " Kakuzu groaned, and Hidan grinned. He liked annoying Kakuzu, it was quite pleasing. "If you say so. " Kakuzu speed up the empty highway, and Hidan laughed manically. The kid was crazy.

How was he not a zombie?

Not that he could complain.

"That's what I'm talking about! "

"Shut up, I was joking about going that speed. "

"Lame. "

They fell into silence again, and Hidan groaned. What was there to do honestly? Nothing much. Read manga? Eh. Hidan sighed and shuffled in his seat, now positioned in a way he would be looking at Kakuzu.

"I'm gonna bother you. "

"Hidan-""You can't change my mind. Sooo you had a wifey? "

"No. "

"Are you gayyyyyy? "

Hidan grinned at the silence, he was thinking about an answer. "I am bisexual. " This guy even knew the terminology for being old.

"So we're in the same boat eh? "

"It appears so. My turn, ever had a significant other?"

"Haha! No! They all thought I was annoying, and I only ever wanted to fuck. You? "

"Yes. "

"Oh wow! "

"She was unpleasant. "

"How so? "

"She acted crazy, and I think she was. She's probably a zombie. One little mistake and she would turn into a demon and yell and scream. "

"Never stick your dick in crazy. "

"I'll never stick my dick in you then. "

"Wow! Kakuzu! Didn't think you had that in you. " Hidan laughed, "And just so you know, I'm not crazy. " the last part Hidan whispered in the direction of Kakuzu and he shook his head.

"You are so dumb... how did you get music without service? "

"I spent six hours hacking into Spotify to get premium for free, only to see that... Spotify would give it to you for free nowadays. "

"Hacking? How much random skills do you have? "

"Only hacking- oh I play guitar. And the drums. "

Hidan reminded Kakuzu so much of her, his daughter. It was weird, he never met anyone like that. So like her. He was so funky. "Of course you do."

"I miss my guitar though. You got one? "

"No. "

"Ughhh, a ukulele? "

"Hidan I don't have any instruments. "

"Hehe.... "

"How do you act like such a 13 year old but be 27. "

"I'm still the same guy I was when I was 23. "

"That was 4 years ago. "

"Yeah. They locked me up when I was 23. And then two years ago this whole thing broke out so. "

"So you really weren't crazy and they locked you up?"

"Yeah! It infuriated me beyond belief, I was soooo mad. " Kakuzu felt bad for him.

"You poor thing. "

"Oh shut up, no need for sarcasm. " Hidan looked down at his phone and typed a few a things, a new anime intro playing. This kid was a huge weeb... damn.

"How much longer? " Hidan rolled his head back on the seat, humming to the song gently.

"Hidan, stop asking every five minutes. "

"No. "

Hidan went quiet again, and changed the song back to an English one, September. Kakuzu hadn't heard that song in years. Wow. This car ride would be over soon.

He hoped the next long car ride went better.

~~~

"I'm hungry, I haven't eaten in two days. "

"Hidan What- how? "

"I don't eat too much, but you got any I'm starving. "

"In the back, I got stuff. Get me something. "

He hadn't even realized he was hungry till Hidan mentioned it. Hidan climbed into the back and looking for the bag, and found it picking up two things and bringing them to the front. "Canned goods... delicious! " Hidan said sarcasm lacing his voice.

"Well that's all I got. "

"I can deal with it. " Hidan popped open both cans of ravioli, and handed one to Kakuzu with the fork already in it.

Leaving one hand on the wheel Kakuzu ate the food slowly. "Water? "

"In the same bag. "

~~~

"Hidan. We are two minutes away. Get ready. " Hidan smiled brightly at the words, and Kakuzu put the mask over his face... Hidan thankfully didn't question it. Hidan looked at himself in the mirror, making sure he looked okay and shoved the manga back into his bag.

"Finally! " he exclaimed and Kakuzu looked at him and rolled his eyes.

"I've been on this trip longer than you. "

"Whatever 20 hours in a car isn't ideal. "

"I guess you are right. "

The two fell silent again as they got closer to the location, that looked like a motel; similar to the one Hidan used to stay in. It was much smaller. And more guarded up. Everything about it just looked... better. Kakuzu parked the car a minute from the motel and motioned Hidan to get out. Hidan nodded and they both got out to walk towards the area, locking the car and hiding all their stuff in the process, Hidans knife in his back pocket and Kakuzus gun in the holder.

The two got to the gate and it opened slowly, and they slipped inside. Arriving inside the fenced in area, a group of 7 sat around in a circle. "You said there was 8? " Hidan whispered, and Kakuzu shushed him.

"Kakuzu, is that you my old friend? " Nagato asked, getting up to look at him better.

"Nagato? " Kakuzu asked and Hidan awkwardly looked down at the ground as the two old friends reunited.

"Who's this? "

"Hidan. " Kakuzu said, motioning towards Hidan who looked up and waved.

"Nice shirt loser! " Hidans head snapped up at the voice of a blonde haired teen.

"Who are you calling loser? "

"You. "

"Deidara don't start trouble. " Another man said, a very pale and weird looking dude.

"Fuck off. " This Deidara scoffed and looked away... well clearly he was a teenager.

"Ahem, Hidan I'm sorry for his behavior. We've been having a bad time, a bit of controversy through the group. " Nagato glanced back at them, and Deidara pretended he was being good.

"It's fine. " 'Why did Kakuzu answer for me' Hidan looked at Kakuzu, who had a stupid mask on. He liked him better without the thing on. Those green eyes looked so good though.... wow.

"Hidan go introduce yourself. " Hidan scoffed but walked over to the group. They all looked unique. None were ugly either- never mind.

"I'm Hidan. "

"So? "

"Look blondie, lets put our differences aside. "

"No, you look fucking stupid. "

What the fuck was up with this kid?

"Did someone shit on your bed or something? "

"Yeah actually- This stupid asshole Tobi did! He's so fucking stupid he's 33 years old but acts like a fucking man child. "

"Loser. "

Deidara looked at him, and then laughed. "Deidara why do you do this everytime a new member shows up?" A black haired man asked, a dog on his lap. A big ass dog too. What the fuck? How'd they feed that thing?

"Itachi, I've gotta do what I gotta do to see if they are worthy. "

"You really don't-""Yes I do. "

"You act like such a child. " a redhead one said, and Deidara scoffed.

"You look like a child-""Shut the fuck up dumb bitch."

These kids were feisty. Hidan liked em. "Sasori~Kun such foul language? " That's the one he didn't like, he was fucking weird looking.

"What's your deal? Why do you look like that? " Hidan asked, completely accidentally. This Sasori held in a laugh and Deidara let it all out.

"Excuse me? "

"You have a weird accent too. "

"What-""Oh my god. No one has ever talked to Orochimaru like that. " Some masked kid yelled, and Hidan raised a brow.

"That's Tobi. He's actually fucking stupid. " Deidara explained, and Hidan nodded, still looking at the man fumbling to get a response out. Without anything to say he reached into his hostel and pulled out a gun, shooting Hidan square in the chest.

Hidan laughed as the man stared in shock as he wasn't affected, and some stared in disbelief and Deidara was asking all sorts of questions. Reaching into the bullet hole, he pulled out the bullet that still didn't go very deep. They never did.

"Pussy. " Hidan stuck out his tongue and Orochimaru got called over by the so called leader, Nagato. He liked the group. The seemed fun.

"How did you survive that? " Sasori asked, poking at the bullet hole that was already starting to close.

"I'm immortal. "

"Sounds fresh. "

"That was the most normal reaction you okay kid? "

"I'm not a kid I'm 17 years old. " He declared, and Deidara scoffed.

"Not with that height your not. "

"Tobi-""No! " Deidara put his hands over Sasoris mouth before the rest of the sentence could be heard, and Sasori laughed.

"You two are dumb. "

"Life of the group yeah? "

"Might take that spot. "

"A horde is gonna hear you guys. " A guy walked by, a big hunk of a man with a Mohawk.

"Kisame, Samehada won't get off. " Hidan remembered his name being Itachi complained and the guy Kisame chuckled softly.

"You two are definitely fucking. " The two sent Hidan a glare, Itachis eyes turning a red color... wait a second- "An Uchiha! Wow! That's so cool! "

"Ugh, they totally aren't. " Deidara scoffed and Sasori laughed.

"You're just mad Sasuke wouldn't blow you haha- Ow! " Sasori pushed him back and the two had a back and forth until Nagato stepped back with Kakuzu and Orochimaru.

"Behave. " Sasori and Deidara instantly straightened up, they clearly were the youngest. Hidan just followed their lead, and looked at the leader of their group. "Well, lets introduce our newest and last members, Hidan and Kakuzu. Tomorrow you will get a stamp of your affiliation, and then we, the akatsuki will finally be ready for our mission. "

"Wait what's the mission? "

"Oh... finding a certain man and getting revenge. "

"And the recovering our old friend. " A blue haired woman added, and the blue was starting to fade and her natural hair was starting to grow in. Wow.

"Yes. "

"Alright. "

"Oh! Right... introductions, Zetsu start. "

"I'm Zetsu. That's it. " Hidan looked at a kid who had a Melanie Martinez hair cut, and was white as fuck. He was fucking around with some plants, and he looked pretty occupied.

"I'm Tobi! Hiyaaaa! " A kid with an orange mask exclaimed, and he was clearly stupid as Deidara had said. He had some green scarf on as well... hmmm.

"I'm Itachi Uchiha. " The black haired one said, and the dog was off him and he was up. He was quite skinny. Long legs. Wow, that Kisame guy sure had a treat.

"I'm Kisame, Now Nagato me and Itachi were to head out today right? "

"Yes, come back before nightfall. "

"Alright, it was nice meeting you Kakuzu and Hidan. Samehada! " the dog ran up behind them as they exited the gates.

"I'm deidara, and this short little loser here is Sasori."

"Deidara we are the same height""No. I am an inch taller. "

"If you keep sucking your own dick you are gonna get it. "

"Boys. Stop. I'm Konan, pleasure too meet you. " She had manners unlike some of the others.

"Hello. " Hidan waved and she smiled, and Kakuzu ran a finger through his hair.

"Hidan, lets bring in the car and our stuff. "

Hidan nodded and jogged over your Kakuzu as he walked towards the gate to get the pickup truck. Hidan jumped in the car when he got there, and packed up everything neatly, or as neatly as he could. They pulled back into the 'base' and parked in a spot a little off from the middle area. There was two other cars, and a one floored series of rooms.

Hidan looked around more, and there was spray painted clouds and just spray paint everywhere, and he thought he knew the culprits. It was most definitely Deidara and Sasori, they had spray paint on their pants that didn't wash off from when they did the graffiti.

Kakuzu turned off the car and pulled out his bags and motioned Hidan to hurry up. Hidan nodded and quickly grabbed his bags and followed Kakuzu.

"Did you make some friends? " Kakuzu asked, as they reached a door and unlocked it with a key.

"Yeah. " Hidan said, and as they walked in he was greeted with power... this place had power? "Wow, power. "

"Yeah, they run two generators. They are pretty set." Kakuzu laid his bag down next to the bed to left and Hidan took the bed on the right. He placed his duffle bag gently, and pulled out his Bruno figure and placed it on the nightstand gently.

"My husband. " He said gently and Kakuzu rolled his eyes.

"Gay. "

"Yeah. "

"Funny. "

"Yeah, you are pretty gay too. "

"No proof. "

"You told me in the car idiot. "

"Those kids already have that much influence on you? "

"I guess so. "

"Well they're both teenagers be careful Hidan. "

Hidan rolled his eyes, and took a little look around. The room had a bathroom, and few other things. A tv, that had a note on it that said to only use it on power days. He should obey that.

"I'm heading back out, need to discuss with Nagato." Kakuzu turned around and Hidan nodded, deciding he would go out and bother more people. As he walked towards the circle, he saw Deidara and Sasori talking between themselves as Orochimaru walked up to them. He had a bad feeling about that.

He speed up a bit and got there just as they started talking, "What do you want? " Sasori asked, annoyed. He clearly didn't like this guy huh?

"Oh Sasori~Kun, Don't be so rude. " the guy said, smiling weirdly.

"Stop being weird. " Deidara said, and Orochimaru scoffed.

"I wasn't speaking with you, no? "

"I was talking with Sasori though. "

Hidan watched as Orochimaru made a face, and Deidara looked just as annoyed as Sasori. They really didn't like him huh? "God, I don't know why Nagato doesn't just kick you out. You are such a bad addition to the the group. "

"Sasori-kun! Why so rude hm? " The guy was getting to close, and Sasori looked disgusted. "Let's go have a private chat no? " Sasori gulped in fear, and Deidara couldn't do anything. Hidan could.

"You should stop. "

"Why are butting in, this doesn't concern you. "

"Because, you are being weird. "

"Well, it has nothing to do with you Hidan. Go mind your own business. "

Deidara looked at Sasori and felt bad he didn't know what to do to help his friend. He knew that Orochimaru was molesting his friend, but he didn't know what to do. Sasori had always acted like nothing was wrong either, but at night when he was sure that Deidara was asleep, he would cry. And Deidara felt bad, bad that he didn't do anything. Bad that he didn't know what to do, but this Hidan guy had just meet them and was trying to help, no no, he was helping.

"No, you leave Sasori alone. "

"This doesn't concern you-"A sound of someone getting punched silenced them all... Sasori had punched Orochimaru.

"I'm tired of you! Just leave me alone! " as Orochimaru stumbled back, he stared in disbelief.

"My little Sasori finally fighting back? "

Sasori made a disgusted face, and Orochimaru hit him back, with double the force that Sasori had hit him. Sasori held his nose, which was the area he was punched. He pulled his hand away and wiped away the blood, staring at Orochimaru. He despised this guy, he hated him. He wanted the guy dead.

"I fucking hate you. "

"No, you don't. "

"Yes I fucking do, get the fuck away from me. "

"Now Sasori you are thinking irrationally-""Nagato!"
Sasori called out, and Nagato stepped out his room a few seconds later and walked over to the group.

"He's doing it again. "

Nagato looked at Sasori, empathy in his eyes.

"Orochimaru. " Orochimaru looked at Nagato, and Nagato sighed. He pulled out the machete from its holder and held it up to Orochimarus arm. "We've spoken about this no? "

In one movement, a piece of skin was off the mans arm and he bent over holding at the skin. "Kabuto! It's time. We are disbanding. " The man yelled, and a silver haired man came running with their bags and the two took their leave, and Nagato sighed.

"Member Orochimaru has disbanded. " Nagato announced, and walked back too his room. Sasori took a deep breath and held his face in his hands, and Deidara stared at his friend. He couldn't do anything, he was useless. Why couldn't he ever do anything for his friend when it came to serious things? The only thing he had really ever done for Sasori was two years ago, when this whole thing started. Which was, the two joining up and fighting through the situation together. They had been through so much, and he still couldn't help his friend in something so serious.

"Thank you Hidan. " the voice was muffled, but the two heard it. Deidara barely heard those words leave his friends mouth, and someone who they had only just meet got it, and he deserved it.

"There's nothing to thank me for. "

"Yes there is, " Sasori removed the hands from his face and looked at them, "There is plenty. Deidara I'm going to our room. " With that, Sasori walked away to where their room is probably and Deidara sighed.

"I'm such a bad friend, I couldn't help at all. I haven't helped for the 6 months we've been here, I just stared in horror. "

"It's okay, you're still young. You weren't taught how to handle this and you shouldn't. "

"Well I should be, I'm gonna turn 18 in a few months. "

"18 year olds aren't taught to deal with those situations either, it's fine Deidara. "

"How old are you, 22? "

"27. That's besides the point, I'm old enough to know what to do to try and help, it's okay Deidara. "

Deidara closed just eyes and opened them slowly, looking up at the sky through all the trees, the clouds covering up almost everything. They sky was something that stayed the same. "Thank you. "

"Go check on Sasori. "

Deidara nodded, "I will, goodbye and... thanks. "
Hidan nodded and Deidara ran back to his room. Now what? He asked himself, and looked around. Not finding much of interest, he just went back to his room and laid in his bed, staring up at the ceiling. It was still only 3 something PM, and he was far from tired, what could he do? Day dream? Yeah about what? Haha!

Where was Kakuzu and why was he taking so long? Almost as if on cue, Kakuzu walked in, and collapsed in the bed next to Hidan, staring up at the ceiling with him. "How has your day been? "

"Weird, saved Sasori from getting rapped by the weirdo. "

"Kind of you. "

"Not time for jokes. "

"I wasn't joking or being sarcastic. "

The two fell into silence, and Hidan caught himself glancing at Kakuzus far to often. He had his mask off now, and probably only just took it off. His hair was down as well, and he looked hot.

"Do showers work here? "

"Yes Hidan. "

"Sick, I'm gonna take one. "

"The time limit is 10 minutes. "

"Okay. "

There actually was no time limit, he only said that so Hidan would be faster in the shower. "Where's the towels? " Kakuzu pointed at the small closet and Hidan walked over too it and picked up the white towel that was folded neatly with two others.

"Don't have to much fun with out me. "

Hidan stepped into the bathroom leaving Kakuzu in complete silence, his own thoughts racing through his brain. A sigh escaped his mouth, and he sat up and stared at the wall. This whole situation... is unique. There was probably a small chance of everything going as well as it went, and apparently from Nagatos words, they would be heading into the city in a few days, taking care of their vendetta for a certain man, Danzo. He heard cities were dangerous, and he has seen some in action. The amount of Zombies was insane, he couldn't imagine how LA or New York looked like, with the big population. One zombie could turn ten people with ease. He didn't know if zombies liked to bite or scratch more, but... there was probably a lot more people dead than alive. Zombie or not.

Before he knew it, Hidan was back out of the bathroom with a towel wrapped around his waist and a much cleaner face. He watched as Hidan shuffled around the room, picked a knife from his bag and walked back into the bathroom, and started to shave his face with the knife, not before adding something that resembled shaving cream. “Isn’t that dangerous? “ Kakuzu asked as he he got up to take his own shower.

“No. I know you shave too, how do you do it? “

“A razor. “

“You are fortunate enough to have one of those. “

“Indeed. “

Kakuzu enter the room in the bathroom that held the shower and toilet, and turned the water to hot. He would take 15 minutes. Hidan wouldn’t notice.
Stepping into the hot water, he let a deep breath escaped his mouth. Showering in lake and rivers wasn’t pleasant whatsoever, this was much better. He felt all the dirt and grim that was building up from the past three days just start to fall away, especially from his hair.

He couldn’t regret joining this group.

And he didn’t.

~~~

The next morning the two were up early, Nagatos demand is awake by 9 am. The two got dressed, and Hidan spent ten minutes deciding on what shirt he should wear, a Jojo one or The promised neverland one. He was such an idiot. He ended up with the Jojo one, it was from part two as Hidan exclaimed when he asked if that one was his favorite one.

“You are such an idiot. “

“Strong words for someone in the same boat. “

The words silenced Hidan, and he couldn’t think of a response. “Uh-hey! Fuck off! “ was all he could say as they did some more minor things to their person, like Kakuzu tying his hair up and adding the mask while Hidan tied old converse shoes on. This kid was just a 18 year old emo kid in an adults skin.

He wondered how Hidan looked and acted as a teenager. Probably more emo, more weeby, and just... weird. Or maybe he was cool and popular than had an identity crisis.

Finishing with getting ready they walked out to the whole group ready in the circle, Deidara and Sasori looked like they did not want to be there. They didn’t sleep at night did they? Irresponsible.

“I will be giving you your official ticket into the group, our cloud tattoo. Konan if you would? “ The blue haired lady walked over to Hidan first, with a hot stick of metal... that was gonna hurt.

“Will you please remove your shirts? “

Hidan laughed and pulled it off, “No date first? “ She rolled her eyes and planted the hot metal in the shape of a cloud on his shoulder, and Hidan had never felt more pain. “What the fucK! “ He yelled but kept still, not wanting to ruin the tattoo.

“Alright, Kakuzu one moment please. “ Konan said and she walked back over to the fire pit that was always in the middle, and picked up the other stick of metal.

Hidan looked over at Kakuzu, who’s shirt was off, and the sight woke him completely up. He had scars covering his whole body... Hidan really wanted to know why... “Wow dude! That’s so cool. “ Deidara exclaimed and Kakuzu scoffed.

“It really isn’t. “

“It sure is. “

“Oh my god I can’t win this can I? “

“No. “ Konan walked back to Kakuzu and pressed the metal against his shoulder, and he barely winced. Hidan stared in awe at the man not even reacting to the burning hot metal, and felt shame on how he reacted. Bullets didn’t hurt him, but a hot metal did? What? Well he did have a higher tolerance for gunshots. He had been shot at least 20 times in his life.

“I officially welcome you two to the akatsuki. “