Deidara
-Deidara and Sasori are around two hours away from base, collecting a bounty because Akatsuki has to get money somehow and Kakuzu definitely ain't sharing
-Deidara is impatient, because their target is annoyingly fast, so they're having trouble catching him
-It's taking a long time and he has to pee >:c
-He gets mad and almost blows up their target, which would mean no money because without the head they can't confirm a kill
-Sasori is Done
-He sticks Deidara in an approximately Dei-sized hollow puppet so he can't cause any more trouble
-Sasori, being a human puppet, tends to forget about bodily needs and tunes Deidara out when he starts whining about being let out for some reason or another
-Just the bomber being annoying, probably
-So Sasori doesn't let him out to take a piss, and by the time they get back, Deidara's... having trouble
-By which I mean the first leak happened he doesn't know how many minutes ago, his clothes are soaked to the knee and he's just barely holding the rest back
-And because he's in a puppet, he can't cross his legs or even press them together, can't hold himself, there is absolutely nothing he can do to make it easier to wait
-And he can't see a damn thing so he doesn't even know how much longer he'll have to
-(just imagine how frantic he is by now)
-He can hear someone talking
-It's Itachi
-Itachi would like to know where his not-boyfriend is please, he seems mostly disinterested but he's secretly freaking the fuck out because where is Deidara
-Sasori makes the puppet let Deidara go and stalks off without looking back, which is good for him because
-Deidara stumbles out and falls as soon as he's not stuck in one place, grabbing himself because the impact made him leak a little more and it's harder to stop every time
-Itachi is Interested In This, but also Deidara looks absolutely miserable so he asks if he needs help instead of pinning him to the nearest hard surface
-Dei blinks his eyes open (it was dark okay) and makes sure no one else is there before he admits that he does, actually, need help getting to a bathroom in time
-He is very grateful that Sasori dropped him inside, where it's not raining, but he still doesn't think he'll make it if he tried to get up on his own
-Itachi is very much okay with helping
-Deidara has been reminded that his not-boyfriend has a piss kink and is now rather amused by the whole situation but also he feels like he's about to explode (and not in the good way) so can Itachi please take him to the fucking bathroom now
-Why yes, yes he can
-Unless Tobi shows up, hi Tobi (who I am aware is not actually Tobi but Tobi is still cute so get in the story)
-Tobi is Concerned
-Tobi is not concerned enough to deal with Itachi death-glaring at him
-Bye Tobi
-...
-So we're back in Itachi's room because it's closer (no one wanted Deidara blowing up the important parts of the building so his room is way off to the side)
-They have to stop for a second so Deidara can collect himself, so he hopefully won't just immediately start going when he sees the toilet (the thought is almost too much for him as it is)
-Yeah that kinda fails and Itachi has to come to the rescue again because Deidara can't fucking move
-But it works out okay because he gets to go and he makes it to the toilet without anything getting on the floor
-Go Deidara