Chapter 9
NARUTO POV
Light seeped through the faded curtains, hitting his closed eyelids, warming them as if he were laying on the beach. Naruto grasped the covers and pulled them over his head, burrowing himself into his own cave.
“Why must the sun rise?” he thought.
The sun meant responsibilities, and responsibilities came with expectations, and expectations were thought up by other people, and other people were met with interactions, and
interactions meant that you had to be satisfactory to how they expected you to act. It was like when people asked you how you were doing, and you were supposed to answer that you were doing
fine. Then you were expected to throw back the question of how they were doing. But the problem was, they probably didn’t care how you were doing, and were just being polite or making
conversation. If they had actually cared, they would only ask you how you were doing if they noticed that something was wrong or if you were catching up because you hadn't seen each other in a
long while.
He sighed, kicking off the covers. He rubbed his temples as he made his way to the bathroom. The toothpaste tasted bitter, stinging his eyes. He spit water into the sink, slightly splashing the mirror that lay in front of him. He peered at his reflection. The water drops tracked like tears down his face. There were dark circles under his eyelids, as if he had been putting on war paint.
“Wait, was I…crying?” He pulled his fingers down his cheeks, causing his eyelids to droop.
How embarrassing, he thought.
He didn't know how, but he’d managed to drag himself to the bridge. As he was the only one there, he took the time to peer into the water below, his reflection staring right back at him. He adjusted his forehead protector, tightened his leg sheath. The plan was to act as if nothing had happened, to not let them know that he’d been home in bed all day because he couldn't bear the thought of facing him. Everything was normal, and he was completely fine. That was until a curious voice called his name.
He was caught by surprise, yet relieved when he saw pink hair.
“Naruto? You actually came today” she said, slowing her walk.
He stayed silent, unable to think of a response.
“Well it's not like we missed you yesterday or anything.” Naruto was almost sure this was a lie, as Sakura turned her back to him, crossing her arms. He could almost feel the forced scowl she wore.
“Sorry about that”, he said rubbing the back of his neck “I was si-” His words faded, carried away by the wind, as his eyes focused on something, or rather someone, coming down the path towards the bridge.
If he had owned a watch, he was sure it would've been frozen at that moment. All the resolve he had built up fell to the ground, utterly shattered like broken china.
He wanted to run away, to climb back into bed and pretend that he didn’t exist. He wanted to steal the sun and lock all his doors, trapping his thoughts, unable to get out. He wanted to forget all the bright colors that overlaid his memories, all the dark ones that clouded them. Everything could be dark, and nobody would know that Naruto Uzumaki was ever here. Problems weren’t given to the nonexistent. He wished that he had never met him. Or more, he wished that he had never had to meet him.
He felt as if he were about to fall over, like the air was pushing down on him, suffocating him. It would’ve been nice if that were true, as his thoughts would be cut off just like his lungs. The beaming sun only made it harder to stand, his eyes feeling as if they were being pushed back through their sockets, tearing into his skull. He grabbed the railing to steady himself, feeling cooked, the wood hot to the touch.