"I CAN'T BELIEVE PEOPLE ACTUALLY READ THIS HERE'S SOME CHARACTER INTRODUCTIONS"
MEET THE CAST (aka the reason Hogwarts might collapse before Christmas)
-Lily Evans-
House: Gryffindor (with special access to Slytherin and Ravenclaw common rooms because the Sorting Hat is still recovering from that experience)
Vibe: Texas-born, lightning-fast temper, will fight for her people, and throw a chair if necessary. Severus's unofficial bodyguard.
Quote: “Touch him again and I’ll make sure you regret your entire bloodline.”
-Severus Snape-
House: Slytherin
Vibe: Quiet, observant, emo boy who got adopted by a redhead with rage issues. Constantly confused why everyone is obsessed with him.
Quote: “I didn’t ask for this.”
Is being stalked by Lucius. Send help.
-James Potter-
House: Gryffindor
Vibe: Born with main character syndrome. Tries to impress Lily. Fails. Gets up and tries again.
Quote: “I swear I didn’t do it. Okay, maybe I did.”
-Sirius Black-
House: Gryffindor
Vibe: Heir to family trauma, but make it hot. Probably fighting with his relatives in three different languages. Is either extremely chill or ready to throw hands. No in between.
Quote: “I’m fine.” (He is not.)
-Remus Lupin-
House: Gryffindor
Vibe: Smart, tired, and pretending he’s not babysitting everyone. Secretly the most dangerous one here.
Quote: “Why is this my problem again?”
-Dorcas Meadowes-
House: Slytherin
Vibe: Sass levels are lethal. Might flirt with you, might hex you. You won't know until it’s too late.
Quote: “You think I care? That’s cute.”
-Xenophilius Lovegood-
House: Ravenclaw
Vibe: Already living in 3025. Speaks in riddles. Might be right. Might be completely off. Either way, you’re confused.
Quote: “Time isn’t real and neither is the Ministry.”
-Lucius Malfoy-
House: Slytherin (5th Year)
Vibe: Grooming problems. Pretty privilege. Favorite hobby: ruining people’s lives while looking good. Currently obsessed with two first years.
Quote: “Don’t act like you don’t like the attention.” (He semi-gives your body my choice but less bad.)
-Narcissa Black-
House: Slytherin (5th Year)
Vibe: Cold and calculated until she snaps. Might actually kill for Lucius. Or because she’s bored.
Quote: “Don’t ask questions you don’t want answers to.”
-Melanie “Mei” Rosa Black-
House: Ravenclaw (5th Year)
Vibe: The quiet one who sees all. A walking side-eye. Shares bloodlines with chaos, but stays out of it—unless it gets personal. Narcissa’s anchor. (She's like sirius's 7th cousin)
Quote: “Cissy, babe, leave him.” (Everyone's is so dark then we have mei's-)