Don't hang the phone up, ellie
Song list
"Pretty when you cry/lana del rey
"Abby-"
"Don't, Williams" abby looks at her, gaze sharp and angry "don't try to convince me, it won't work"
"Abby It's not like how you think it is-" Ellie would never see herself in this situation, begging abby Anderson, the murder, to just listen to her for a second "-just listen to to me, goddamn it" she raises her voice, hands trembling, the papers fall down on the floor, but ellie stands still "if you think that I was there to blame every dropped blood on you, I was not, abby, even- even if you were the one who did it, I would cover it up for you, fuck that I would even lie to them about you being a victim in the case just to get you out of there"
"Don't you realise, Williams?, its not about you 𝘸𝘰𝘶𝘭𝘥 do, its about what you 𝘥𝘪𝘥" abby steps closer to her, her braid on her shoulder, ready to be undone and done again, just like how ellie was so ready to be broken by abby and then fixed also by her.
That was how she saw herself in front of abby, not weak but going to play like one so abby would win and ellie could be able to see that proud look on her face, so she-
"I did what I could do, and that? That finally got you out of the damn mental hospital, didn't it?"
Abby rolls her eyes, "you owned me that one, piece of shit, you fucking did, and don't you damn try to deny it cause there will be consequences that you won't like"
Abby turns, grabbing her backpack and throws it over her shoulder, bord shoulders, and starts walking away.
Ellie watches abby taking slow steps, like the world would wait for her to do everything she wants, or what she needs; like how bad she wanted to kill Ellie, the world would waite for abby and ellie made sure of it.
That was the point, it didn't matter to ellie that she would be another dead body on the floor for abby or someone to fuck or maybe just some girl to love, to miss and to kiss out of deep feelings that are coming from abby's heart; ellie just wanted to be around abby, just wanted to be able to see those eyes and to get lost in them till the world starts living again, ellie would be looking deep into those eyes with love even if abby was stabbing her chest with a knife that ellie had given it to her.
"I love you"
Three words, made abby stop walking, she looks over her shoulder, the only sound is abby's breathing, ellie is holding it just to try the chance of dying in that moment with holding her breath so she could live this moment over and over again even after her had gotten cold and her heart has stopped beating; but, even if that heart had stopped and the body was cold, they would be warm and beating whenever abby wanted them to.
"I..I always had..it was people around me..who..blinded me from seeing it, abby"
Abby does move this time; her eyes scan ellie for hundred million times, but then, they stop right on her eyes.
𝘎𝘰𝘥, ellie let's out a shaky breath, breathing in and holding it again
"How long?" Abby drops her backpack on the floor "how long ago you felt it?"
"The first moment I saw you" Ellie bites inside her cheek, scratching her fingers with her nails nervously, abby wouldn't let her get away with this, and she did not want her to do so.
"From the first moment" abby repeats
"From the first moment" Ellie whispers, looking at the ground, she could never hold abby's gaze
And after that it was just like a dream, that one dream that had gotten true, the one that abby was waiting for and ellie was desiring it all those months
Ellie doesn't know how and when, but abby was not standing right in front of her, maybe with taking hurried and long steps.
Abby's hands fall on her chin and jawline, she looks up when abby titles her head up but can't find her eyes in the right moment cause the second that her head is kept up her lips are against abby's.
She doesn't breath, and begs everything and everyone just so could she would live this moment for as many hours as she can.
She closes her eyes, relaxing her body against abby, letting her hands to have an adventure in abby's hair, the blonde hair that would look so angelic with red blood splashed on it.
Abby pushes her, her back hits the wall, but meanwhile this the break doesn't get broken, unlike their promises to each other.
Abby places a tiny plastic bag in Ellie's hand, her other hand on Ellie's waist.
And finally.
They break the kiss with heavy breaths, abbys nose is buried in ellies neck, she whispers "put this in your bosses drink, and have him dead, Ellie dear" and it makes Ellie shiver, abby squeezes Ellie's full hand one time before leaving her, in that stupid tunnel, for good and bad to find her, but with her eyes always there so she could be there on time to let no harm happen to ellie.
-----
"What's it like/Nxdia
4 months ago, Newyork
"I told you that I won't accept a new case- no no, jesus, I'm already handling one" she sighs, with dina calling her name from the bathroom; she starts getting off the couch and ruffles her hair "yes, that's what I've been trying to tell you, idiot, I cannot-" she steps in the bathroom when she finds its door open, "-do two jobs at a same time, try to call Jesse, he might have some free time" "she picks her head behind the curtain covering dina in the shower, dina points at her to join, she does nothing other than accepting "I'll call you back", and steps in the bathtub after taking her clothes off.
"Finally" dina murmurs under her breath, rolling her eyes "it was taking you forever to arrive, honey, traffic?" She teases
"Mhhm...I would rather traffic than whatever that call was about" Ellie says, her face few inches away from dina's, her eyes pierced on her lips "but this would be even better than the traffic"
"Oh yeah?"
Ellie replys with pulling her into a kiss, under the hot water of the shower
.
"I can't stay"
"Oh" dina doesn't stop her movements and covers her body up with clothes, her hair damp "though you had gotten a day off?"
"It's Joel, he wants to see me"
"Family business?"
"Job-mixed-in-family-business" Ellie sits on the floor, pulling her socks up
"Right"
"Ok" Ellie rolls her eyes, grabbing dina's ankle, looking up at her from where she is sitting down on the floor "you know that I don't want you to be mad, babe, it's just..It's not like I'm not going to come back in what? Like, an hour or two?"
Dina shakes Ellie's hand off of her ankle and moves to the other side of the room, opening a drawer "I know" she murmurs, acting busy
"Oh, and I know that you do not know" Ellie gets up, standing behind dina after grabbing her keys, kissing her shoulder "I love you" she breathes in, holds it
Dina humms, nodding
"You're not going to say it back, hmm?" She places a few kisses behind her ear, hands traveling up and down her waist and hips, and then stopping on her belly
"Don't do that"
She let her hands fall down, that was how dins was like after loosing her unborn child, she had gotten all too sensitive about someone -who was only ellie- touching her belly
And that day she had felt like she had lost everything at the same time, her child, her fiancé, her home and her happiness.
Her therapist kept telling her that the depression would get worse if she could go on a vacation with her fiancé-ellie-, and to also her therapist had mentioned that it would be easier to deal with those memories by getting rid of the clothes she used to wear while carrying the baby that never got to the point where he could get to be born and live.
Dina couldn't do anything other than staying silent most of the time and just letting ellie to fill out the silence that was a guest in their house with reading the case that she was working on out loud so dina could have her mind off from everything about her own life for an hour or so
"And I love you"
Ellie breaths out, giving her a smile, and leaving the home.
The home, which was turning out to be only a house for dina, she wouldn't admit it.
.
"So? That's it?, we just let go of the case? Right 𝘢𝘧𝘵𝘦𝘳 I got told to that there's a new case having no-one working on it?"
"Look, kid, I know it sounds crazy, but this case? It cam be solved by a 5 year old, no point in keeping up with this, we've always had a better name out there, the people who would solve the cases that no-one else could" Joel sighs, placing the cup of his coffee on the table "and I know so well that none of us is interested in having a glow-down, mostly when it's about ruining the name that we have had made for our selves or the other way"
"I.." Ellie shakes her head, hands crossed on her chest, body relaxed on the chair "I just told the guy that we don't have time for another case, joel" she kicks Joel shoe from under the table, "I told him to contact 𝘫𝘦𝘴𝘴𝘦 cause the bitch 𝘢𝘭𝘸𝘢𝘺𝘴 has free time"
"Then call the guy and tell him that you do have some time now, ellie, I ain't playing about this one, where could you find something like this story, huh?, the only goddamn thing that you need to do is to just go to a damn mental hospital for a few days, find the murder and have them in jail, you need something easier than that? Though you have had solved a lot of more difficult cases"
"I know what you're doing, and I'm telling you, don't" Ellie takes a bite from her cake, looking around the almost empty cafeteria, and then looking back at Joel "Don't think I'll say yes with you trying to prove me that I have done better than this easy ones before" that's how it always worked.
Joel would sweet talk her to accept a case that was a hell to get it done, the ones that always made her have those mental breakdowns that dina did not like.
And Joel did absolutely not wanted that to happen, but also, he couldn't force ellie to leave a case unfinished. She did not work like that, Joel did not like it, but fuck him cause when he was the one who had told ellie to work on those stupid papers and stupid people with more stupid pasts, why would they need solving when there was only 3 more years left till their lungs stop breathing? Like, 𝘳𝘦𝘭𝘢𝘹 𝘮𝘢𝘯, 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘢𝘳𝘦 𝘵𝘢𝘬𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘭𝘪𝘧𝘦 𝘴𝘰 𝘧𝘶𝘤𝘬𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘴𝘦𝘳𝘪𝘰𝘶𝘴𝘭𝘺, ellie would repeat that in her mind, all the time.
So
"I'm not trying to do that-"
"Oh fuck off-"
Joel holds his hand up, ellie stops talking, "-all I'm trying to say is that, didn't you mention that dina's therapist had said that a vacation would be good for both of you two?"
"For her, she didn't mention my name, I guess"
"Whatever, this case? It has some good money in it, and it's located in Mexico, I'll go with you if you want to, ellie, and I'll help you with it-"
"-I dont need your help-"
"-and then later you can come back home if you're that disparate for America"
Ellie stares, sighing and shaking her head in disappointment "Oh I wouldn't"
"Who would?" Joel murmurs under his breath, taking a sip of his now cold coffee
"So, that's a yes?" He lowers the cup down, looking ellie in the eyes
"Guess so"
Ellie gets the details about the case a few minutes later when she and Joel are walking towards his car and out of the cafeteria, "your friend's there? Thought you had only me" she teases
"Haha, very funny" Joel opens the cars door, gets inside the driver seat "my friend jerry" he starts the car but-
"I wanna drive" Ellie appears next to his window
Ellie doesn't have to say another word for Joel to step out of the car and gets in the passenger seat.
Ellie gets in the driver seat,"Jerry? That highschool friend of yours?"
"Yeah, he was the one who called me for it, seems like he is trying to create an safe space for her daughter in the mental hospital"
"The fuck, her daughter's there?"
"He told me that the court had done wrong by her, and instead of jail, they have had sent her there, cause of her boyfriend death"
"So she would be in jail or a mental hospital anyways" Ellie wishpers, "what was her name again?"
"Anderson"
"First name?"
"That's for you to figure out, kiddo, go there and make some friends"
"Sure" she let's out a laugh "with the crazy daughter of your friend, why wouldn't I?"
---
After hours/The weeknd
"Williams, you're early today, unusual" her boss says with his mouth full, "get me a coffee, will you?"
Ellie turns on her hills and rolls her eyes, acting all ignored but that's what you want,hmm? Or should I say it's what she qants and you're taking notes of every little word that leaves her mouth only to do them as soon as you can so you can prove her that you deserve her, huh?
𝘛𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘪𝘴 𝘩𝘰𝘸 𝘸𝘦𝘢𝘬 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘩𝘢𝘷𝘦 𝘨𝘰𝘵𝘵𝘦𝘯, 𝘦𝘭𝘭𝘪𝘦? 𝘚𝘦𝘳𝘪𝘰𝘶𝘴𝘭𝘺?
Ellie shakes her head "fucking shut up" murmurs under her breath and pours the hot water in the cop, with a add of coffee powder and the shit that abby gave her a day before, don't do it ellie, it won't end well, they will figure out that it was you who did it
She freezes, "that's her goddamn plan"
𝘕𝘰 𝘪𝘵𝘴 𝘯𝘰𝘵 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘪𝘥𝘪𝘰𝘵, 𝘴𝘩𝘦 𝘪𝘴 𝘫𝘶𝘴𝘵 𝘢𝘴 𝘴𝘵𝘶𝘱𝘪𝘥 𝘢𝘴 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘢𝘳𝘦
"Then why didn't she-" she shuts up when one of their newbies enters the the small part of the building where they call the kitchen, the young man (boy) gives her a worried look, grabs his thing and walks out
"Look" she sighs, "she must have figured something out because she wouldn't just tell me to kill someone with drug or whatever the fuck that this is, there has to be a reason"
𝘛𝘩𝘦𝘯 𝘧𝘪𝘨𝘶𝘳𝘦 𝘪𝘵 𝘰𝘶𝘵 𝘣𝘦𝘧𝘰𝘳𝘦 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘥𝘰 𝘪𝘵
With a shake of her head, she pours the coffee in the sink, making a new one, handing it to the boss and sitting behind her desk in her office
𝘕𝘰𝘸 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘢𝘳𝘦 𝘮𝘢𝘬𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘴𝘰𝘮𝘦 𝘴𝘦𝘯𝘴𝘦, 𝘸𝘪𝘭𝘭𝘪𝘢𝘮𝘴
The journey in her computer is a long one, checking every website and browsing over it till her eyes hurt, still after 2 hours of doing it she finds nothing important, just a few details about her bosses ex-wife, the child who abounded him since she turned 18 and-
A cold case about him
𝘎𝘰 𝘧𝘰𝘳 𝘪𝘵, 𝘨𝘪𝘳𝘭
"Find me a number with this name" she hands Jesse a paper with abby's name on it after running out of her office "be quick"
Jesse seems fucoed on his laptop, typing fast, eyes darting from side to side of the screen "there's nothing"
"What?"
"You heard me" jesse looks up at her from his seat "nothing is here"
"Bullshit" Ellie murmurs, moving so she can stand behind Jesse's chair, leaning closer to the table to take a proper look "try again"
"Ellie-"
"Try again, maybe you have misspelled the name" she taps his shoulder "a-b-b-y"
Still nothing
"You sure that's her full name?, I have had a friend in highschool named Johnny and we would call him John, people are interested in shortening their names to sound cooler"
"No..no She wouldn't do it...try the last name"
"I already have tried the full name you gave me-" he argues
"Only the last name, hurry"
He types Anderson down, hundreds of names and pictures pop up, informations and everything else that ellie won't need until its about her abby
You sound pathetic, your abby? When did she become yours? Hmm?
"Send me this page, I will check it myself"she turns on her hills, walking out and murmurs an answer to the voice in her head "Since I met her in the damn mental hospital"
She scrolls and scrolls, doesn't stop, she writes down a lot of numbers of different abby Andersons, a lot of them don't answer and the few that does, well, they are the one she wants
"Hi, it's ellie Williams calling from the-"
The person hangs up
The next number, "hello its ellie Williams calling from the south-check agency, can I have a minute?"
"You already took that before asking"
Right. The voice is not even close to abby's voice "I think I have the wrong number-"
"No, you actually got me red handed, ellie Williams, what did you call for?"
"I..." she tries to get her shit together, so, she grabs a paper, writing down in it "can I know your name?"
"It's David"
"Right, I have found your number with another name on it, can you tell me the reason, David?"
"What name?"
"It's not important, the thing that matters is why you have-"
"I have a lot of numbers, ellie" he laughs "a lot that you can't even count, now, I think that I might want to have a number with your name on it too, it's a big collection of mine, the collection of people who make me interested in having more and more conversations with"
"How are your conversation with those type of people who you are interested in?"
"Just like this, ellie, count yourself as one of them, and please, remember that I'm not too far from where you are" he sighs loudly in the phone "I mean...I would love to have a conversation with you when we are face to face, in a fancy place and a-"
David stops when ellie hangs up, taking a look at his side, he faces the crying girl, "Hey hey...it's ok" he approaches her, taking a look at her wrists that are tied up "I was talking to a new friend of mine, don't tell me that not being around you for a second made you all sad and jealous"
The girl trembles, eyes red from crying, the tape on her mouth muffling her voice
"Don't worry, I won't leave until you do"
---
Devil's advocate/The neighbourhood
Ellie doesn't have any idea of what she is trying to do, she just hangs the phone up, covering her face with her hands, murmuring to herself
She kinda expected this to work out, so she could get a hint of what abby is up to, excluding being a patient needed to be in a mental hospital but currently is out cause of ellie's hands.
𝘋𝘰𝘯𝘵 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘳𝘦𝘨𝘳𝘦𝘵 𝘨𝘦𝘵𝘵𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘩𝘦𝘳 𝘰𝘶𝘵?
No, ellie does not regret it, she had put a lot of thought in doing it, so it wasn't a hurried-like choice, it was calculated
That was how everything for ellie worked like; she knew what she would do if anything turned in a way that would surprise her
Her day was planed, her meal was ready, but some days, being a mess would be the way that dina used to describe ellie's life, "I can't deal with you and the life that you have made for yourself, most importantly for me, ellie, I have had enough" dina had said that her before leaving, famous last words was what ellie had titled the sentences that dina made before breaking up with her.
And dina? She was calm, her days going with the flow, she wouldn't mind a last minute plan, unlike ellie
And they have had a lot of disagreements since ellie told her that they have to go to Mexico for the job, dina didn't like the idea of leaving her sister behind, "you can never say 'no' to Joel, can you ellie?, I have never seen you disagreeing with his words for once" dina's question were left unanswered by ellie, by the way it was not like she had made no protest against Joel for taking this case, she did, but gave in after just figuring out that she wanted to accept the case.
Ellie and Joel were, and are, very familiar
Dina had recalled that with "it's almost terrifying", and it was, if Joel wanted to have a chill night by the lake, ellie would too, if ellie wanted to stay silent and don't talk about the topic joel would stop talking and not because of ellie, no, because they were both comfortable with doing the same things in life