Detention

“I hear footsteps…” Seokjin whispered, looking wide-eyed at Yoongi beside him. “I think Filch is heading right over here!”

“We better make this convincing then,” Yoongi grumbled. He really did not want to get out of bed today. It was a Saturday after all, his day for sleeping and playing piano all day. But then again, if the mission Namjoon thought through failed, Yoongi will surely have to sacrifice his next Saturdays for more detention time.

“Mr. Filch! You don’t have to go in, everyone else is in there for sure!” he heard Jimin yell from outside the door.

“Then if everyone’s inside, it won’t hurt if I took a look then,” Filch replied as he resumed trying to open the door.

“Quick! Do something Namjoon would do,” Yoongi hissed at Seokjin.

“Um… uh…” Seokjin stammered. “Namjoon-ah! Watch out for that box there!” he yelled before slamming himself onto one of the boxes on the ground.

“S-sorry! I’m such a klutz!” Seokjin yelled again but in a much deeper voice that Yoongi could only describe to be a bad imitation of Namjoon’s.

“See! Namjoon’s inside too!” Yoongi heard Taehyung yell.

“Quick, your turn!” Seokjin hissed back at him. “Say something Jungkook would.”

‘Okay, something Jungkook would say…’ Yoongi thought to himself. ‘You’re around that crazy kid so much, you should at least know something.’

“J-Jungkook-ah! Don’t throw that empty box!” Yoongi yelled before switching his voice to a higher-pitched one. “T-this bitch empty! YEET!”

“What the heck was that?!” Seokjin hissed.

“I don’t know, Jungkook says it all the time!” Yoongi argued.

“We’re so screwed,” Seokjin groaned. Just then, the sound of crashing was heard on the other side of the door followed by Filch yelling.

“KIM TAEHYUNG! IF YOU THROW ONE MORE CHAIR I’LL—”

“DETENTION SUCKS! LET’S GET OUT GUYS!” This time, it was Jimin who was yelling.

“Are they trying to get themselves double-killed?” Seokjin asked.

“They’re trying to distract Filch even more,” Yoongi observed.

“That’s it! You two are coming with me back to the office!” Filch yelled. The sound of Jimin and Taehyung’s protests were heard again and then footsteps before everything fell quiet again. Yoongi and Seokjin waited anxiously for what was going to happen next when they heard knocking on the door.

“Yoongi-hyung, Seokjin-hyung, the coast is clear,” Hoseok spoke. Both Seokjin and Yoongi breathed out a sigh of relief before opening the closet door and leaving the room.

“Man, I was so scared,” Seokjin exclaimed. “I thought Filch was going to get us for sure.”

“Kudos to Taehyung and Jimin’s quick thinking for sure,” Hoseok grinned. “What’s the next part of the plan again.”

“If things are running smoothly, Namjoon and Jungkook should be breaking into Professor Snape’s storage room right now,” Yoongi answered. “We’re supposed to meet them upstairs after a while.”

“Hopefully nothing goes wrong like it did with us,” Seokjin sighed.

…

“Can’t you go any faster?” Namjoon pressed as he watched Jungkook slowly picking the lock on Professor Snape’s storage room. The longer he stood watching, the more he felt as if the scary Potions Professor was going to come around any moment.

“Lockpicking takes time, okay?” Jungkook protested as he used a screwdriver to slowly turn the lock.

“Professor Snape will be here any moment!” Namjoon argued.

“Just a few more turns and… there!” Jungkook exclaimed as the lock clicked open. The padlock fell to the ground and began to emit a high-pitched whistle. Namjoon and Jungkook jumped back.

“What the hell is that noise?!” Jungkook yelled as he covered his ears with both hands.

“Professor Snape must have cast a Charm on the lock to have some kind of alarm system!” Namjoon answered. “He’ll be coming back soon! Get to the secret passageway Yoongi-hyung talked about! And take my phone too so you have some light!” Namjoon reached into his pocket and tossed Jungkook his LG phone.

“What about you?” Jungkook asked.

“I’ll distract Professor Snape so you better hurry. You remember what ingredients I told you to get, right?”

“Yeah,” Jungkook nodded. Suddenly, the lock stopped sending the noise. Jungkook stopped covering his ears just in time to hear the sound of footsteps coming down the hallway.

“GO!” Namjoon yelled. Jungkook gripped his phone tightly before going to the portrait next to the storage room. He lifted it slightly from the wall and saw a hole in the wall big enough for him to crawl through. ‘Thank you, Genius Slytherin Min Yoongi,’ Jungkook silently prayed before lifting his body into the hole.

‘It’s up to you now, Jungkook,’ Namjoon bit his lip worriedly. He picked up the lock and clamped it back in place. ‘Okay, now I just have to pretend that the lock just fell off and I—’

“Mr. Kim Namjoon,” the sound of Professor Snape’s famously passive-aggressive voice jolted Namjoon from his thoughts… and caused him to scream maybe a little.

“Oh! P-professor!” Namjoon stammered and adjusted his glasses which fell off a little during his shock.

“What do you think you’re doing breaking into my storage room?” Professor Snape narrowed his eyes suspiciously. “For a Ravenclaw, you seem to not know what locks are used for.”

“I-I know what locks are used for… sir,” Namjoon swallowed.

“Then tell me,” Professor Snape took a step towards him. “Why did I just hear my lock alarm going off?”

“Well, I was just wondering… what kind of lock you use..?” Namjoon stammered.

“What kind of lock I use?”

“Yes sir. I’m very interested in… locks,” Namjoon said. “And I wanted to see what kind you would use for your own potion ingredient storage room. I mean, there must be some valuable stuff in there so you’d probably use a pretty good, durable lock but the one you use is pretty interesting to have some sort of alarm system because of the Charm you used which I could guess, based on how it works, is some kind of—”

“Your incessant rambling is wasting my time,” Professor Snape waved him off with a sneer. He pushed Namjoon aside and waved his wand while uttering a few words. The padlock glowed bright red before turning back to normal. “Now, Mr. Kim Namjoon, if you’re done inspecting this lock, it would do you some good to leave my sight. Now.”

“Yes Professor!” Namjoon nodded and scampered away to hide behind a wall. From behind it, he saw Professor Snape eye the door of his storage room before walking away.

…

“Ow!” Jungkook exclaimed, rubbing the painful bump on the back of his head. Yoongi told him about the secret passageway but he didn’t really tell him how small it was. Jungkook had bumped his head several times already as he crawled through. ‘Well, at least it’s not totally dark here,’ he thought to himself as he held out Namjoon’s LG phone to shed some light on the path ahead. Ahead of him, he spotted a fairly large, square-shaped hole on the ground.

“That must be the entrance!” Jungkook said excitedly and began to crawl faster. As soon as he reached the hole, he shoved Namjoon’s phone in his pocket and lowered himself down the hole. The floor of the storage room was much farther than he thought but he landed on his feet without much of a sound anyway. Outside the door, he could hear Namjoon-hyung with Professor Snape. It was hard to miss his passive-aggressive tone. ‘Just stall for a while longer, hyung,’ Jungkook bit his lip worriedly and began using Namjoon’s LG phone to illuminate the labels of boxes on the shelves.

“Okay… Flubberworm slime… Dung Beetle shells… Mandrake fertilizer… Salamander eggshells,” Jungkook muttered as he stuffed the potion ingredients into a giant sack he found lying around in the storage room. Once he finished, he tossed the sack up into the hole he came from. Then, he used one of the large crates in the room as a stepping block to climb up to the ceiling, through the same hole, and back into the passageway.

“Mission: success!” Jungkook grinned to himself as he crawled back to the entrance.

…

“Where is he??” Namjoon muttered to himself as he paced the hallway in front of the portrait worriedly.

“Maybe a box of lionfish spines accidentally fell on him?” Inner Namjoon said worriedly.

“No way, Jungkook’s smart and coordinated. That won’t happen to him,” Namjoon explained.

“Hey! I’m back!”

“AH!” Namjoon yelled in surprise and turned around to find Jungkook crawling out of the hole from behind the portrait.

“I got all the ingredients you told me to get,” Jungkook said, tossing the sack over to Namjoon. “Do you need a cauldron to brew that potion?”

“I’m not brewing it,” Namjoon shook his head and inspected the contents of the sack. True enough, Jungkook got everything.

“So… what are you making then?” Jungkook asked curiously.

“Well… it’s basically a giant stinkbomb made from a bunch of stuff mixed together,” Namjoon said. “But… worse.”

“Awesome!” Jungkook grinned and high-fived Namjoon. “You better teach me that.”

“Sure thing!” Namjoon smiled back. “We just need to wait for Seokjin-hyung and the others to come here.”

“Good luck to them going through that passageway we went through,” Jungkook snickered. “I bet they’re all screaming right now.”

…

“OH MY GOD I THINK SOMETHING BRUSHED PAST MY LEG!”

“SHIT I FEEL IT TOO!”

“SHUT UP YOU TWO I’M SURE THAT’S NOTHING BUT NOW I’M STARTING TO FEEL SOMETHING TOO!” Yoongi yelled at his friends walking behind him. ‘Come on Yoongi, the Slytherin common room is just as cold and dark as this is,’ he tried reasoning with himself. But that would be a lie. The Slytherin room was way better than this passageway. Even though people often said that he didn’t look like he was scared easily, Yoongi was pretty jumpy himself when it came to loud noises and such. But right now, his two annoying best friends were making a racket.

“I really wish we had our wands right now…” Seokjin grumbled as the three of them climbed up the steps in the dark.

“And a gas mask or something,” Hoseok added.

“You can say that again,” Yoongi agreed. The steps were slippery, the walls were slippery, and there was a smell all around them that Yoongi didn’t even want to think about either. ‘I wonder how Namjoon and Jungkook survived this?’

“Hey, isn’t that an exit right there?” Yoongi heard Hoseok speak up. Seokjin climbed up further to stand beside Yoongi.

“You’re right! I think that’s the exit!” Seokjin exclaimed excitedly.

“Alright!” Yoongi cheered and began walking up faster while trying not to slip on anything at the same time. Then, he came to the top of the stairs which had a wall blocking the way. Light shined around the edges which meant that it could only be a doorway.

“Finally! We can get out of here!” Hoseok cheered.

“Okay, let’s all push at the same time,” Seokjin said. Yoongi nodded and placed his hands against the door. Beside him, he felt Hoseok and Seokjin do the same thing. “3…2…1… PUSH!” The three of them pushed against the door which swung outwards immediately, leaving them to fall through on the floor.

“Light! At last!” Seokjin exclaimed.

“There you are!” Yoongi looked up to find Jungkook and Namjoon staring down at them. “We’ve been waiting for you for forever,” Jungkook said.

“Shut up! That tunnel was not easy to go through,” Seokjin protested as he stood up and dusted himself off.

“You could say that again,” Namjoon grinned.

“I bet there were snakes there too!” Hoseok added. “I swear, something slithered by legs a few times.”

“That’s just your imagination, hyung,” Jungkook chuckled.

 “Anyway, did you guys get what you needed?” Yoongi asked as he stood up.

“Yup, all here,” Namjoon said, shaking a sack in front of them.

“Show me how to make that stinkbomb hyung!” Jungkook said excitedly.

“Stinkbomb?” Hoseok and Seokjin chorused.

“But worse,” Namjoon said.

“That’ll make Filch leave his office,” Yoongi nodded.

“So… how do we make it?” Jungkook asked. Namjoon crouched down on the floor and began pulling the packs of ingredients out of the sack.

“Alright, watch and learn,” Namjoon cracked his knuckles. Everyone else began to form a circle around him as well. “The first thing you put is mandrake fertilizer, a whole lot of it,” he said as he tore open the bag and poured all of its contents into the sack.

“God, that smells gross,” Hoseok wrinkled his nose. Yoongi coughed and covered his nose from the stench.

“Mandrakes are pretty gross too,” Jungkook said, his voice sounding nasally since he was pinching it closed too.

“Then, add the dung beetle shells and the flubberworm slime. A whole lot of both too,” Namjoon said as he added the two ingredients. Those ones didn’t smell as bad. “Lastly, the salamander eggshells. But add those when you want to detonate the bomb.”

“We’ll need to do this over the stairwell then,” Seokjin said. “It’s better if it lands in the lower floor than this one so it’s nearer to where Filch is. And after causing a commotion here, we’ll be closer to our rendezvous spot afterwards.”

“Good thinking,” Namjoon nodded and stood up. The five of them then made their way to the stairwell. Namjoon added a couple of the salamander egg shells into the sack and began shaking it vigorously. Not long after that, the bag began to smoke and shake.

“Shit! It looks like there’s something alive in there!” Jungkook exclaimed.

“We’ll need to throw it far down onto the floor downstairs. Right near where Filch’s office is,” Yoongi said, pointing to a ledge downstairs near the right wall.

“Care to do the orders, Captain?” Namjoon grinned and handed the bag over to Hoseok.

“You got it,” Hoseok grinned and took the bag.

“We’ll have to scatter once the bomb lands,” Namjoon said. “And cause more of a commotion. But we meet up at the stairwell like we planned, okay?”

“Alright,” Hoseok nodded. He looked downstairs and then at the stinkbomb potion thing in his hand. “Here goes nothing then…” Then, he hurled the sack.