Lockwood Part 4

It had been two weeks since Angelina left for Tibet and in that time, Remus had been extremely busy. A troll had managed to find its way into the school and the teachers were sent to deal with it, though the full moon was the following evening so Remus wasn’t exactly fighting fit. Hermione Granger had been the one to go looking for the troll and Ron and Harry had gone after her, though Remus seemed to be the only teacher who didn’t believe that. He was well aware of Harry and Ron teasing her and he disapproved greatly, he made sure they knew he knew they were lying with a look after the other teachers left to deal with the students. Remus was very disappointed in them.

His role at the school had become more complicated since Harry’s arrival, his duties to Harry as his student and to his parents as their friend was a line that was blurring by the day. Remus didn’t want to tell James and Lily about their son’s every infraction, but he also didn’t want to cause any kind of separation between them. Thank goodness Lily understood this and was a little more trusting of Remus’s decisions to leave Harry alone while he makes new friends and adjusts to his life within Hogwarts.

Remus was aware that Dumbledore kept various things safe within Hogwarts, usually because the minister had asked him or a very old friend. Remus wasn’t surprised to hear that they were now playing host to the Philosopher’s Stone and some of the teachers had been asked to help protect it. It was his job to deter people from going to the third-floor corridor, something that hardly seemed a difficult job, until he remembered the things James used to get up to in school. He kept a closer eye on Harry after that.

Angelina had written to him a few times, she was having difficulty finding the village she had read about, ‘Dǎkāi xīnlíng’. It didn’t appear on any map, not that Remus seriously thought it would, but it was worth checking. It also didn’t appear in any book he could find about soul magic or even blood magic for that matter, so where exactly had she read about it? He wrote and asked, struggling to understand how she went from one subject to another, before wondering if the brother had anything to do with it. Remus had a sinking feeling about her whole trip.

‘I should probably start from the beginning.’ Remus sighed, sipping his tea, he had decided to go to George with his concerns and maybe shed some light on Angelina’s thinking. George was kind enough to make him some tea while they waited for Anna to arrive home. ‘You remember Dumbledore came to you and told you about how Angelina was getting bored and we had devised a plan to keep her occupied so that she would be less inclined to misbehave.’ The tired and greying Healer nodded, sipping his own tea. ‘She came to me during her second year to learn about boggarts, though when I had spoken to her about it, she claimed not to know what she feared. Of course, you know we soon found out that she feared possession more than anything… she came to me a little before she left for Tibet and said she felt like a prisoner in her own body.’

George took a breath of realisation.

‘She’s gone out of fear.’ George said quietly.

‘I think so.’ Remus nodded. The two men didn’t have time to sit and take any of it in before Darren spoke from the stairway, having heard their conversation.

‘Why didn’t you stop her?’ He asked, he looked tired, like his quidditch season was taking a toll on his body that he wasn’t ready for. Remus and George watched him. ‘If you knew she was scared, why didn’t you tell her to stay?’ He was staring at Remus with an anger he’d never seen on Darren before.

‘Darren-‘ George stood up.

‘No, let him speak, let him try to explain himself. If my sister was scared and ran off to some dangerous place where she could get hurt or killed, why didn’t you tell her to wait? Or better yet, go with her?’

‘Darren that’s enough!’

‘She’s been gone nearly three weeks and all you’ve done is hide away in the castle and pretend like everything is fine!’ Darren was taking a few steps closer to Remus and it was very clear that he wasn’t himself. ‘You claim you’re in love with her, but do you know what I think? I think you’re just using her so that you can have an easy life.’ Remus stood up as well, Darren was touching a very fine nerve.

‘Darren!’ George was failing and Remus was being put in an awkward position.

‘I think this has all been very convenient for you,’ Darren’s eyes were blood shot and it wasn’t difficult to tell that he’d barely slept. ‘You’ve got what you need, Lockwood’s Wolfsbane, the Anti-Flaring and now she’s gone. Most likely she’s being killed right now, ripped open by some stray Yetis, because we all know my little sister cannot resist her curiosity getting the better of her, something that you encouraged to no end.’

‘How could you think that?’ Remus said, quietly. He could feel his hands shaking, but he needed to remain calm. ‘How could you possibly think that I am using Angelina for any reason?’

‘Oh, I think it’s very easy for you, I think this is second nature to you.’ Darren was sweating, and George was making subtle movements towards him, reaching slowly for his wand. ‘I’ve seen your kind before, the supposedly shy ones, the quiet ones, the ones who no one pays any attention to. You’re observers, you watch the people around you and figure out what use they have to you… you weren’t here, when she was unconscious and possibly dying, you weren’t here, you decided your precious teaching job was more important than the supposed love of your life. You are a fraud and I can see it now, so clearly.’ Remus could see deep into his eyes, they didn’t look like Darren’s, they were darker and somehow wilder.

Remus reached into his pocket and pulled out the small box he kept with him at all times. Everyone had frozen. Remus carefully opened the box and made sure Darren could see his mother’s ring very clearly.

‘This was my mother’s ring and I have kept this box with me since before the World Cup,’ Remus explained carefully. ‘I have every intention of giving it to Angelina at a time when she is clear minded and sure of herself. Darren, you know full well how I feel about her, the same way you feel for Clara.’ He could see the logic playing out in Darren’s head, his eyes began showing shades of deep blue. ‘I think George, it’s clear to see that Darren cares greatly for his sister’s wellbeing, something we have in common, however, there is someone else who requires as much attention, don’t you think?’

George released a small breath. ‘Darren, when is the last time you spoke to Clara?’

It was as if a bright light had been turned on and all the darkness left Darren’s eyes, leaving only two pools of deep blue. ‘Clara.’ He whispered. Soon everything hit him all at once, making his body weaken. Remus was the first to him, quickly putting the ring back in his pocket and easing Darren’s surprisingly heavy body onto the floor. Darren had begun shaking and George did his best to tend to him, but Remus could see the pain the Healer was in.

Anna had walked in just as the two men were taking Darren upstairs to his room, she helped them as best she could until they could explain what had happened. It was Remus that she cried into, while George did his job with his son. Remus noticed a familiar smell, something light and non-intrusive, it was the same way Angelina smelled, but somehow Remus hated it on Anna.

He stayed a little longer and did his best to explain everything to Anna and comfort her while George did his best with Darren. Remus sent a message to Clara via Floo network and hoped she would be there soon. Anna held Remus’s hand and gave a half smile through her watery eyes.

‘Thank you, Remus,’ she said, losing her voice halfway through. ‘You know Darren doesn’t mean what he said, don’t you?’

Remus sighed. ‘I know that it wasn’t quite him speaking, yes. It was just a little overwhelming and worrying. He tapped into some very harsh insecurities I have and I worry that it’s something he might be able to do again.’

‘You mean with Angelina?’ Anna frowned.

Remus sat forward and tried to think of the best way to say it. ‘Anna, Darren would never let anything happen to Angelina, you know this, but this isn’t the first time he’s lost control. Did Angelina tell you about the argument they had?’ Anna shook her head. ‘She had come back from the Alban Hills with those symbols and Darren was upset that she hadn’t translated them as quickly as they would have liked, from what she told me, he questioned a lot of things that she questions about herself. Anna I’m not saying that you and George have done anything wrong as parents, you’ve been put in a very difficult position, but I wonder if more can be done.’

‘Like what?’ It wasn’t a snap, or even defensive, it seemed Anna really was looking for a suggestion.

‘I have no idea,’ Remus half smiled. ‘But maybe we can start by looking at the prophecy? Maybe we can start trying to actively help Angelina in her research? I’m not an expert in any of this and George will know more, but all I know is that what we are all doing right now, is simply not enough.’

Anna nodded and thought for a moment. ‘I always thought you were wise beyond your years Remus,’ that pulled a much more genuine smile from him. ‘I’ve said it before, but I am glad that Angelina found you.’

Remus didn’t stay long after that and left before Clara arrived, he had a lot of thinking to do. He arrived back at the castle soaked through from the rain, but a part of him didn’t mind. He kept his hand in his pocket and his fingers curled around the ring box. For some reason he took it out and looked down at the beautiful ring his mother used to wear. It was simple, nothing fancy and nothing outrageous, silver with a small ruby on top. It wasn’t much, but it was all Remus had to offer.

He wasn’t sure why he started crying, but he missed Angelina and she was the only thing on his mind.

‘Sir?’ Remus’s head snapped around to see Nathan behind him.

‘Nathan, shouldn’t you be in bed?’ Remus quickly composed himself.

‘Yeah, I was just walking Millie back.’ His cheeks lit up pink.

‘Well, you’d best hurry back up to the tower.’ Remus suddenly realised he still had the ring out and began putting it away.

‘Did she say no?’

‘What?’

‘Your girlfriend? That’s an engagement ring, did she say no?’

Remus wasn’t exactly in the mood for entertaining anyone at the late hour, but Nathan had always been more mature than most. Remus titled his head, indicating Nathan should follow him to Gryffindor Tower.

‘Truthfully, I haven’t asked her yet.’ Remus found himself saying. He took his wand out and began drying his clothes. ‘She’s still in Tibet.’

‘When will she be back?’

Remus sighed. ‘Whenever she decides Tibet is no longer the place she needs to be or if there is nothing further to explore.’

Nathan’s eyes widened. ‘You mean she just goes to these places and you have no idea of when you’ll see her again?’

‘Yes,’ Remus half laughed. ‘That is pretty much how it works.’

‘I don’t think I could do that.’ Nathan shook his head, his messy dark hair swaying as he did. ‘If Millie went away, I’d have to know all the details, where she is, when she’s coming back, if I could go with her.’

Remus couldn’t help his laugh. ‘Well, young love is often slightly obsessive like that. You get used to it over time.’

‘Obsessive?’

‘It’s new and exciting, it’s an exploration and often people your age cannot resist the temptation to explore constantly.’ Remus wasn’t exactly sure why he was talking about love with his sixth year, but he didn’t seem to mind it too much.

Nathan seemed to be pondering a question. ‘Sir, is it too forward to ask how long you and Angelina have been in love?’

Remus laughed again. ‘That is a very forward question, one that, I’m afraid doesn’t have a simple answer. No, Angelina and I are not a conventional pairing, never have been.’

‘Because of your condition?’

Remus stopped in his tracks and lost all the breath in his lungs. Nathan just watched him, frowning slightly. ‘Nathan, I… how…’

‘I have an uncle with the same condition, he knows Alfred Hughes, the watchmaker and when he mentioned someone called Remus, I just put two and two together. No one else knows, I promise. I haven’t told anyone.’

Remus managed to gain his motor function back and swallowed, guiding Nathan into the DADA classroom just down the corridor. ‘Well, thank you for bringing this to my attention.’

‘I’m not going to tell anyone sir, you’re the best teacher we have and you should hear how some of the other-‘ Nathan stopped mid-sentence. ‘People like you, talk about you, about your life. I think it gives them hope. You certainly give me hope.’

Remus let his breath go in relief.

‘Professor, I want to be a Healer, I want to help people with the condition, I want to help my uncle, he’s so lonely and he’s always miserable when the time comes, he can’t afford the potion, but I figure if I get a good enough job, he won’t have to.’ Remus could see such goodness in Nathan, for all of his misbehaviour and humour, his heart was in the right place.

‘Thank you, Nathan.’ Remus smiled. ‘I feel sure you will make a fine Healer.’

‘I hope so, need the grades first I suppose.’

‘You’ll be fine,’ Remus said, matter of factly. ‘Just keep working hard and don’t let your personal life interfere too much. Your studies come first and my door is always open if you’re struggling with anything.’ Remus could see that there was something bothering him and readied himself to answer Nathan’s questions. He took his cloak and jacket off, flinging them over a desk and invited Nathan to sit with him, in case it was a long conversation. ‘If you have concerns about your safety or my ability to-‘

‘Why would I be concerned?’ Nathan frowned. His brown eyes scanning Remus’s face. ‘Surely if you were a risk, you wouldn’t be here?’

‘Well, precautions are being taken, but it’s never one hundred percent safe.’ Remus tried to make him see. ‘As long as you stay away from this classroom during the full moon, there’s nothing you should be worried about.’

‘You change in here?’

‘Well, in my room.’ Remus suddenly thought on how strange this conversation was. ‘I keep it locked, put protection charms up on both the classroom door and the corridor outside, just to deter people from coming anywhere near here.’

‘That sounds like a lot of precautions.’

‘Unfortunately, it’s necessary.’ Remus said, a little sadly.

‘But anyway, that wasn’t what I wanted to ask.’ Remus frowned at him. ‘Look, this is a little humiliating for me to ask, but it’s not like I can talk to my friends about this stuff, but I just wanted to ask your advice about Millie.’

‘What about her? I thought you were getting along?’ Remus cringed a little as his phrasing, but Nathan didn’t seem to mind.

‘No, we are, I just… she’s really great, I know it seems a bit soon to be saying it, but I think she might be the one and you managed to get Angelina Lockwood to be your girlfriend, who really is hot, I know I’m not supposed to say that, but she is and no offense but she could get James Potter or Gilderoy Lockhart if she really wanted.’ Remus laughed and felt his cheeks burn pink. ‘How do I keep Millie the way you’ve kept Angelina?’

Remus took a breath and could see that it was a genuine question. Nathan really did love Millie. ‘Well…’ Remus began and realised he had no idea where to start. ‘I’m afraid, I don’t have the answers, like I said, Angelina and I work a little bit differently to everyone else… I suppose that’s what you need to figure out, what works best for you and Millie and can you build a life around that. Angelina often leaves for a few months at a time to explore new places and research new things and I stay here and teach bright young things like yourself.’

‘Months?!’ Nathan exclaimed, making Remus chuckle slightly. ‘How can you be without her for months?’

Remus sighed. ‘Patience. The woman you love should have all of it. Angelina is a little younger than me, so she needs the time and space to do some things on her own, something you and Millie need to allow each other to do, to grow into the people you are trying to be, to accept each other for any flaws or mistakes you make and build something stronger from it.’

Nathan thought for a moment, Remus wasn’t sure why he felt a degree of comfort talking about Angelina to him, but he could see that Nathan desperately wanted the answers for himself and not for any malicious reasons.

‘Is that why you haven’t asked her to marry you yet? Because you’re waiting for her to make her mistakes?’

Remus chuckled. ‘There are a lot of reasons why I haven’t asked her yet, most of them very personal, but waiting for her to make mistakes isn’t one of them. She’s made plenty and I’ve never thought any less of her, I’ve made mine and she doesn’t think any less of me… my only advice for you is exactly what I said in class, hard work, patience, commitment and a sense of humour.’

Nathan smiled and looked down at his hands. ‘I hope she says yes professor and I hope you make each other happy.’

‘As do I.’ Remus nodded. ‘Now, let’s get you back to the Tower before anyone else finds you out of bed at this hour.’

Remus walked him back up to the Tower and they spoke a little about his studies and no more about their love lives, but Remus had a good feeling the subject would come up again. He finally laid his head down to rest and dreaded the next day of classes.

It was cold when I first arrived and I didn’t mind in the slightest. My long black coat kept me warm enough and there were plenty of small settlements between myself and the base of Manaslu. I had asked a few of the locals about the village I was trying to find and no one seemed to know anything.

I rested in a small settlement close to the base of the mountain and the next day I would make the trip, but for now, I needed sleep.

‘Why are we here? Where is my brother?’ He didn’t stop screaming at me, he made my bones ache in an effort to slow me down, but I knew it was just an illusion and pressed on anyway. ‘Angie, you cannot make this trip, my brother is in distress, we must go to him.’

‘I’m not going back, we’ve come all this way.’ I said as I began laying myself down onto the soft mattress on the floor.

‘You won’t find what you’re looking for.’

‘You don’t know that.’

The brother was silent as my eyes closed and I knew the night would be filled with nightmares.

The sun shone through the cracks in the window and I felt my body aching in every joint and bone. The brother had been busy. I took a breath and tried to focus on Remus, the way his hands moved over my body and relaxed my muscles, it was enough to get me out of bed and send me on my way to the base of the mountain. I thanked the locals for their hospitality and listened to their suggestions on different routes to take so as to avoid the bulk of the yetis.

I got on my broom with some difficulty and sped off in the direction they had suggested. The cold wind was cutting into my skin and I knew I would need to stop soon. The whole place was beautiful, covered in snow and clear skies, the yetis wouldn’t come out during the day as they could easily be seen, but I knew they were there, watching me.

I finally found the village at the bottom of the mountain, it was filled with people watching me curiously. Families of witches and wizards, all of them curious about the stranger who had arrived from apparently nowhere.

I wandered up to the small market and carefully approached one of the merchants, selling what looked to be various animals in jars.

‘Excuse me? Erm… Dǎkāi xīnlíng?’ The merchant shook his head and I began asking various other merchants the same question, but no one seemed to have any clue of what I was talking about.

‘You see, it’s a myth.’ The brother hissed and I tried to just ignore him.

It was a solid three hours of asking around the market place, pubs and public areas, but no one knew anything. I eventually settled in one of the small pubs for the night and wrote to Remus as I had done every night.

Remus,

I’m still searching. I haven’t found the village yet, but I have made it to the base of Manaslu, the yetis haven’t managed to eat me just yet, but I imagine their curiosity is peaking the more time I spend here.

I know you want me to come home soon, but I can’t leave until I’ve found what I’m looking for or at least be certain it doesn’t exist. I’m sorry, but I know you understand this.

I’m currently resting in a pub in a wizarding village, someone here must know something, I’ll try again tomorrow.

I hope you are well and I hope Harry is doing well in his studies.

Yours

Angelina

I sighed and closed the book, I just wanted to sleep, but it seemed that sleep was something that the brother had no interest in. He just didn’t stop talking.

I watched the people in the pub as they went about their routine and the barman kept his eye on me. I could see a curious figure out of the corner of my eye, a monk. He wore red robes and was sitting with someone dressed entirely in black with a black hood, I couldn’t see his face, but the monk kept looking over at me. I decided not to approach them just yet, but it looked like they could have been the kind of people who could have led me to where I needed to go.