The Big Night
Chapter 43: The Big Night
“I’m so nervous.”
Ira was looking out the backseat window of their Escalade to the throngs of paparazzi and fans who were waiting and yelling excitedly at each person who pulled up to the red carpet.
Tawan reached over and grabbed her hand on the armrest she was gripping to shake her hand loose to make her look at her. She offered Ira the best, most confident smile she could muster as she pushed down her own nerves of being under the public eye's microscope. She would try to be strong for her wife by ignoring her nerves of large crowds and social gatherings.
The night had come for the awards show and they both felt like all of today’s preparations for it had sped by them up until now in this moment.
They had hired a driver, a hair stylist, and a makeup artist to alleviate some pressures and agreed on the outfits they had discussed in the bathtub that night. Tawan was always thankful that Ira preferred her in suits whereas Ira could dabble in both her feminine and masculine bags that always stunned Tawan at either way. Ira was glad that modeling allowed her to explore and expose so much about herself to herself.
The whole time Ira was getting ready, Tawan looked at her with so much lust and affection and yearning that it made her squirm under her stare and giggle at the same time.
“We’re here to have fun, remember?” Tawan reminded her, bringing her hand up for a kiss.
Ira broke her eyes away and looked to her for a moment. “You’re right. Like we agreed on. We’re here to have fun,” she remembered, nodding and smiling at her.
“There’s my girl,” Tawan winked and kissed her fingers.
Their SUV pulled up and Tawan leaned forward to tell the driver to stay inside and that she would get the door for Ira. She then turned to her wife to lean towards her and pecked her lips, careful not to disturb their lipstick. Ira smiled at her and she winked back before turning and exiting.
Tawan was taken aback by how roaring loud everyone was as she closed the door. She nervously shot her cuffs out and flicked her bone straight hair behind her back before she rounded the SUV. She smiled and waved a little tensely at the people screaming towards her and fawning over her being a doting wife as the paparazzi blinded her with their camera flashes.
Her hand reached for the door handle and she cracked the door open to peek inside to ask Ira if she was ready. Ira was finishing her checkup of her makeup in her compact mirror then faced her to nod as she put her it back in her clutch. Tawan smiled at her taking a deep breath then winked to her when she looked into her eyes, making her smile more confidently.
The door opened fully and Tawan stepped back to raise her hand to her to grab so she could also watch her exit. Ira stepped out and her bare leg was exposed by the slit of her dress to reveal the sexy YSL heels she was wearing. Tawan gulped and sneakily shook her head to which Ira giggled and rubbed her thumb over the top of her hand to let her know she caught her.
Tawan smiled to herself and tried to keep her head down for as long as possible until her blush went away.
“Hey, guys. I’ll take that,” Mali greeted, smiling as she emerged from the crowd seemingly out of thin air and taking Ira’s clutch for her. She had been waiting there for them for about 30 minutes.
“Good to see you,” Tawan smiled back to her.
Mali smiled and nodded before she stepped ahead of them to lead them inside while also trying to stay out of the way of security, personnel for the awards show & venue, and the throngs of cameras flickering like the sound of a hummingbird's flapping wings.
Tawan hovered her hand over Ira’s lower back, the heat of her skin calling her, and leaned over to tell her she should walk it alone so she could have some pictures of herself. Ira shook her head and grabbed her hand, pulling her to stand beside her. Though this was a moment that they had earned separately under their own merits, it would be one that they celebrated together.
Ira laced their fingers together as she leaned over to her ear. “Don’t let me fall,” she said, her legs starting to wobble a bit in anxiety.
“Never,” Tawan replied back instantly, squeezing her hand. She was glad she elected for platform loafers and loved that Ira towered a few centimeters over her than usual with her heels.
Ira, out of reflex, reached over and fixed her suit jacket for her before adjusting her button up shirt to her liking, opening it just a little bit more on one side. It exposed her chest more than she would have liked, but when you are married to someone this desirably good looking then you show it off while also marking your territory. Her eyes flicked up to Tawan’s as she adjusted the lapel of her suit jacket and she could not contain the grin that broke across her face.
Tawan looked like Sammy, smiling sweetly at her in thanks like when she would adjust his school uniform tie for him so that he was comfortable.
“Thank you, baby,” Tawan leaned over and said as she squeezed her hand.
Ira nodded at her and gave her a thumbs up of approval before turning towards the all too familiar calls from cameramen who wanted her to pose for them.
Both women waved their freehand at the cameras and fans that were calling for Ira to look at them. Tawan squeezed her hand again to tell her she was ready before taking a step to lead them inside. She opted for waving occasionally so she could lead Ira and keep any unwanted contact at bay as she focused on greeting and waving to everyone like an adored princess before they disappeared inside the venue.
Upon entering the venue, Mali ushered them to the entrance hall but stopped them one more time for the awards camera team. Tawan was shocked to say the least when she heard people calling her name for her attention to get her picture. Ira smiled and looked to her endearingly before turning her attention back to the cameras to point at various directions for them to look to and pose.
Tawan followed her lead and only took back over when it was time to head to their table.
“Thank you, darling,” Ira said sweetly as her wife pulled her chair out for her.
“You’re welcome, my lady,” Tawan nodded, winking to her and taking her seat beside her.
They were seated a few rows back from the main stage and looked around them as others started to slowly enter the venue.
Mali informed them that Meena was already there but she was mingling with a table on the opposite side of the room. Tawan chuckled knowingly and shook her head at her partner not knowing when to shut off work. Ira looked to her and patted her thigh in amusement before resting her hand there to calm her nerves. This prompted Tawan to scoot her chair a little more closer to her knowing she was still a little nervous.
“Ira?" Mali said as she scrolled on her phone from her seat next to her. “Cosmopolitan is here and wants to set up an interview.”
Ira’s jaw dropped some at her words. “Excuse me, Cosmopolitan?” She asked for assurance.
“International exposure. Nice,” Tawan grinned mostly to herself and nodded. “Is this about the global hot new talent issue they want to cover next year?”
‘How did you know?” Mali teased and nodded.
Tawan puckered her lips at her jokingly as she pointed at her ear and let them know that she knows people. Ira laughed at her being silly and squeezed her thigh just as Tawan slid her arm across the back of her seat to rest there. She got comfortable in her seat and her own nerves started to subside as everything started to settle.
As they waited for the guests to arrive and the event to start, Tawan and Mali discussed the interview Cosmopolitan wanted to conduct with Ira. They wanted to get to know her and her goals for next year to feature alongside other new talent. It made Ira nervous so she observed their surroundings as she lightly and absently scratched her manicured nails on her wife’s thigh.
“Fuck,” Ira gritted sharply, quickly turning her head forward.
“What? What’s wrong?” Tawan asked concernedly, leaning over to her. She placed her hand on top of hers that squeezed her thigh to coax her to loosen her grip and look at her.
“They’re here,” Mali glowered, looking behind them.
Tawan looked up to her then back to Ira before turning her head around to land on none other than Mr. Tek, some investors she recognized for Vibe/Me, and - the absolute last person she ever needed to see again for both of their sakes - Lai.
Her blood instantly boiled in rage at the sight of her and it was Ira’s hand on her thigh gripping her into place, as if she subconsciously knew, that kept her from bolting over to her. Tawan immediately faced forward, sharply inhaling through her nose, before closing her eyes to count down from ten to calm herself. She had to dig deep and remind herself that this was a special occasion for both of them that did not need that kind of drama, and especially so publicly considering it was personal for Ira.
The night that Ira told Tawan everything she could recollect about her past with Lai made her sick to her stomach. As Ira cried through her reliving of her assault and trauma at the hands of Lai, Tawan’s heart shattered into a million pieces at how vulnerable she was being with her to tell her about the times she felt so scared and petrified of that she thought she had no control over her life or safe place to go.
What made it worse is that Ira was so young, just barely experiencing adulthood, and she had to go through such a profound and heavy thing like this that could have really ruined her.
Ira bared her soul to Tawan and apologized profusely about keeping this from her which made the pieces of Tawan’s heart break into more pieces. She rushed to assure her that she did not have to ever apologize about this and that she just wanted her to know that she would always be there for her and would never let anything like that happen to her again. Tawan tenderly held her face with both of her hands, stared into the eyes of her most delicate flower and the embodiment of her love, and promised her that she would never ever feel those things again.
Tawan wanted so badly to help Ira in any way that she could, knowing that her blocking these memories from her mind to protect herself was not a good thing. The weight of this had turned into something that Ira felt was like a burden or shame or both or more. Tawan knew she needed to work through this, to see a professional who could help her on a journey to healing so she could relieve this pain towards the understanding that none of this was her fault.
She knew that she had to support Ira on this path the way that Ira wanted to navigate it, but if she had to gently push her with love down the road then she would.
“I’m right here. I got you,” Tawan reminded her softly into her ear, caressing her hand up and down the exposed skin of her back.
Ira swallowed hard and nodded as she felt tears prick the corners of her eyes. Knowing that the person that tried to hurt her wife to destroy her marriage and upend their family was so close now made her stomach churn and her anger flare. She quickly shook it all away and focused on whatever her eyes landed on straight ahead of them.
Though she never wanted to see Lai’s face ever again for as long as she lived, she was glad that Tawan was beside her this time knowing everything she knew. She knew she worried about her over all of this, and she hated the thought of her doing that, but she was not ready for what she knew she was expecting her to do and what she knew herself she needed to do.
Talking about her past with Lai meant reopening old wounds that she thought she had stitched up. Lai managed to have such a profound affect on her in a short amount of time that it consumed so much of her life even up until this point. It made Ira sick thinking about Lai still having her tentacles deep within her, as if she possessed or owned her body, and it made her involuntarily shiver in disgust as if to shake them off.
She just wanted to be rid of her and for things to go back to how they were before she showed up. But the more she thought about it, the more she realized things happened the way they did and it was probably for her benefit to come to terms to rectify it all. Furthermore, it allowed for her and Tawan to come out stronger than they both could have never imagined.
“I know,” Ira said, looking to her and smiling thankfully. She loosened her grip on her thigh and scratched her fingers there to soothe both her and herself.
Tawan nodded and reached down to grab her hand on her thigh again to hold in her lap. She threaded their fingers together and Ira laid her head on her shoulder for a moment. Tawan kissed the top of her head then squeezed her fingers as if she was trying to warm her up.
Mali smiled sadly at them before glaring behind them to keep her eyes on Lai who was staring at their table now. She must have felt her death stare because she looked to her for a second before down and away. Thankfully, Meena came back over to the table and greeted everyone jovially given the achievement for a pseudo nomination for their barely birthed magazine.
Meena sat beside Tawan as she congratulated Ira again for own achievement that she said she knew for sure she was going to win. Ira, genuinely, started laughing at her antics and shook her head as Tawan and Mali joined in after observing her for a moment. Tawan kept reminding herself that she and Ira had earned the opportunity to be considered for this moment, so she cannot let Lai have any control over their lives especially as it pertains to their happiness.
She would carry whatever she had to on her back to ensure of that.
“Oh, Ira? I was talking to Elle Magazine about FleurDe and they wanted me to let you know they’re big fans of yours,” Meena smiled, giving her two thumbs up.
“What? Seriously?” Ira asked, smiling in disbelief between her wife and Meena.
“Babe,” Tawan chuckled and shook her head.
“When I said I was from FleurDe they literally said, ‘Oh, yeah! Isn’t the CEO married to the Versace model from Vogue,’,” Meena snickered, eyeing her business partner.
“Hmm, I like that. I need to change my social bios to ‘Wife of the Versace Model’,” Tawan smirked, her hands waving out an arch.
Ira laughed at her and linked her arms with her left one. “Your so sweet,” she crooned and nuzzled her nose to her shoulder.
Tawan pressed a soft and careful kiss to her hair again so she would not mess it up then inhaled her. Mali and Meena smiled at them and how cute they were being before sharing a look of knowing they were both the third wheel for the night.
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
“We are starting the night with the ‘Breakthrough Talent of the Year’ award. The nominees are as follows,” the award presenter said and everyone clapped.
Ira instinctively grabbed Tawan’s hand to hold and play with her fingers nervously in her lap as the nominees were shown on the large screen.
Her eyes started to sparkle when a photo from her shoot with Vogue for Versace flashed across the screen for her nomination. The crowd sounded like it was clapping and cheering louder for her, and Tawan’s whooping next to her made her laugh as she leaned into her to hide her shyness. Tawan kissed her head and rubbed her exposed back before grinning back up to the screen in anticipation for the drum roll.
Tawan looked to Ira quickly to mouth that she loved her and Ira’s eyes welled with tears at how her eyes shone so much of her feelings. Ira mouthed it back to her and scrunched her nose at her causing her signature laugh to escape her for just a moment.
“For ‘Breakthrough Talent of the Year’…,” the award presenter started and reached for the envelope.
Tawan felt Ira’s hand find hers again and she squeezed it as they zoned back in on the presenter. Ira waited with baited breath as she felt the balls of her feet start to bounce.
“And the winner is…,” the award presenter said, looking up at the crowd for dramatic flare then back to her card.
Mali was nervously squirming in her seat as she refrained from reaching for her phone to busy her hands and mind. Meena smirked at her table from her seat, having all the confidence in the world about who was going to collect that trophy on nothing more than her pure instincts.
“Ira-,”
“OMG!” Ira screamed into her hands as the crowd roared all around her.
Tawan reached over and removed her hands. “You did it, baby!” She whooped and pulled on her hands. She motioned for her to stand to take her moment while cheering her on at the same time.
Ira stood as her eyes started to water at the emotions that were overwhelming her.
All around her were the sounds of people cheering her on and congratulating her on a recognition that she had both earned and deserved. She smiled and blew kisses as she waved all around herself and tried to bow in thanks to as many people in as many directions as she could. Tawan clapped for her then quickly pushed her chair out of her way before scooting back herself some so she could head to the stage.
Just as she looked up to clap some more for Ira, she was met with her hands gently holding her face to press a soft kiss to her lips. There were audible sounds of admiration and sweetness at the tender, behind the scenes moment as Ira told her she loved her then headed to the stage without another word. Ira got overwhelmed by her emotions and did not think twice about the overt display of affection in public with Tawan.
She crossed her fingers and hoped she got to repeat it soon when Tawan’s name was called as the winner for her award nomination later tonight.
Tawan’s stomach fluttered at the way she looked at her and told the world that she was hers. She had a lovesick and proud smile on as she watched her ascend the stairs to head to center stage. Ira took her award, smiled down at it for a second with pride, then stepped to the microphone as she cleared her throat and the crowd shushed.
“Oh, wow. This was so unexpected. I thought the viral pandas at the zoo had a better year than me,” Ira joked, eliciting a laugh from the crowd. “In all seriousness, you all have been so very kind tonight. I want to start by saying thank you to the governing body for even considering me for this very highly respected recognition."
Everyone clapped and murmuring sounds hummed the building. Tawan's eyes glistened as she thought about how far her wife had come since she started this journey.
"Thank you to the voters and thank you to the other nominees who I am so honored to have shared this space with," she continued, nodding and bowing some at the applause. "Thank you to the people who follow what I think is my boring life but find so much in common with it, and thank you to every single brand that has taken a chance on me.”
The crowd clapped and Ira nodded again, swallowing as she tried to remember her speech she wrote that only her eyes had seen. Tawan stared at her on stage like she thought she hung the moon, mesmerized by the way the crowd was enthralled with her wife and the words she had so clearly thought out and kept private for this moment exactly.
“To my friends, thank you for supporting me with your advice and kind words. Especially to my manager, Mali; we did it just like we always said we would. I love you, sister,” she continued, swallowing hard in thought and nodding at the crowd. “To my family, especially my parents, thank you for letting me trip and fall and scrape my knee even when it hurt you to do so, so that it would shape me into the woman that I am today. Your love knows no bounds and I am blessed that you are my examples and support.”
Mali wiped at the corner of her eye and cleared her throat into her fist. Meena patted her hand over her heart as an audible “aww” rolled across the room. Tawan sniffed and quickly wiped under nose thinking about how that must have touched her in-laws hearts.
“And last but most certainly not least…,” Ira said, smiling to the crowd knowingly and looking in the direction of her table. “Thank you to my wife and our children for always reminding me of my purpose. To my babies, I hope I can serve as an example to you about what perseverance is in the face of adversary. Never give up on yourself just like me and your mother will never give up on you.”
The crowd let out another “aww” except this time it sounded like fawning. Tawan blew out a breath through her lips as her wife’s words pricked her heat. Mali and Meena watched her and smiled knowing personally from experience by simply observing them how important this last part of Ira's speech was going to be.
“To my adoring wife, Tawan,” Ira chuckled shyly as the crowd murmured knowingly, sniffling and nodding at her. “Thank you for always pushing me to realize my full potential. You inspire me every day to give my best and to always be genuine. I dare not to ever wonder what my life would have been like without you. You are my heart, my soul, and my love.”
Tawan grabbed at her heart as the crowd clapped and cheered Ira on, a shot on the large screen near the stage of her completely lost to her wife flashing to the crowd. Ira wrapped up her speech and waved one more time in thanks before moving to exit to a standing ovation. Mali and Meena looked to Tawan and gushed at how she was reacting to Ira’s beautiful and sweet sentiments.
“I’m sure they’re asking her for a quick interview,” Mali chuckled knowingly as she stood. “We’ll be back in just a moment.”
Tawan and Meena nodded in understanding and asked her to pass on their congratulations and praises again when she saw Ira.
Mali rushed off to hug her best friend and the sister she always wanted so they could have just a small moment to celebrate for themselves how hard they had worked for this. Meena started talking about how Tawan's nomination was around the middle of the show, so they still had about 30 minutes to go. Tawan nodded and looked at her wristwatch to note the time.
Ira managed to quickly hug Mali as she rushed to her to pass along Tawan and Meena’s congratulations. She was being swooped up and rushed away to dozens of microphones being thrust into her face to ask her a few questions. Ira answered them a little distractedly as she watched the television in the room that was showing the award ceremony so she would not miss Tawan’s turn for recognition.
As only Ira could do when distracted a little, she still managed to charm the room and reporters with her bubbly personality and striking beauty for a successful interview.
“Thank you all for the questions,” Ira smiled, hands clasped under her chin and bowing.
Mali swooped in and grabbed her trophy that sat in front of her on the table to then lead her back to their table with her hand at the small of her back. She congratulated her profusely and told her that her phone had been blowing up with congratulations and even some people wanting to set up meetings as soon as possible. Ira, bending her knees some to the shorter woman so she could hear her as they walked, nodded to what she said and gave her both thumbs up.
She was still on Cloud 9, her body buzzing and her mind jovial.
Tawan immediately stood when she saw them making their way back to them. She smiled as she watched Ira, illuminated and glowing from the flashes of cameras, wave and grab a few hands from people reaching out to her on her way back to her seat. Ira looked like a beloved people's princess with the way her eyes disappeared and her gums beamed while smiling and thanking her public who adored her and threw themselves at her beyond just loyalty.
She was serving as a role model to both younger and older women who saw her representing so many different things.
“Ahhh,” Ira squealed joyfully as she got closer to her wife. She raised her arms at her and scrunched her hands as she walked up to her to wrap her arms around her neck.
“I’m so proud of you, baby,” Tawan said by her ear. “I love you so much. Congratulations.”
Ira squeezed her close and rocked her a bit. “Thank you so much, my love. You helped make this possible. I love you more than words can say,” she responded emotionally then kissed her cheek.
Tawan rubbed up her back a few times before pulling back some. “You’re more than welcome. You’re parents said to tell you congratulations and that they love you,” she told her then grabbed her face to give her a quick and sweet kiss, not caring about all the pictures being taken.
They pulled back and smiled at each other, love swimming so vast and deeply in both of their eyes. So many things accumulated up until this moment and they did not take any of it for granted no matter how hard or tough it was to get here. It was moments like this that reminded them to relish in it and absorb it for all that it was while they could.
“Are you happy?” Tawan asked her, caressing her cheeks with her thumbs.
“Very happy,” Ira smiled then pulled her in for a hug around her waist. She squeezed her close and nuzzled her nose to her neck making her ticklish.
The host of the ceremony let everyone know that the show was about to start back up again and everyone took their seats.
Ira leaned over to Mali to ask for the trophy so she could show it to Tawan, and Tawan took it and examined it with the widest grin she had produced in a while. She thought about how hard Ira had worked and how she had accomplished so much in such a short amount of time. There was no one more qualified or earning of this honor to her than her wife.
The night seemed to want to end just as quickly as Tawan needed it to as her anxiousness about her nomination bubbled at the surface. As she watched very important people around the country come up to talk to Ira in between breaks of the show, however, she realized she would suffer through it if it meant seeing her wife being so doted on by such influential people. If Tawan did not know any better, Ira could have been a politician in a past life but without the corruption she used to write about and more like a beloved historical figure of significance.
“It is now time for the ‘Most Influential Writer of the Year’ award.”
The crowd clapped and every person's attention turned to the stage or the large screen that showed the nominees.
Tawan took a deep and preparing breath just as Ira’s hand shot out to take her hand from her lap to hold in her own as they kept their attention on the stage. She kept reminding herself that no matter what the outcome was that it did not define her especially after so many industry leaders had congratulated her and offered guidance over the last few months. More importantly, they were leaving this award show with something for Ira and that was always more than enough for her.
The nominees flashed across the screen and Meena had to refrain from snorting when Mr. Tek and Lai were named as the representatives of Vibe/Me.
Tawan almost rolled her eyes with her but refrained and Ira squeezed her hand. As Meena had predicted, the summer issue was successful in bringing in a spike of mothers who praised the fashion magazine for including them where they are typically not considered. The irony was that, technically, Tawan and Meena were also apart of that nominee due to their contributions to the issue.
When Tawan's headshot came across the screen, she put her hand near her mouth to hide how shy she felt at the rather raucous applause she received. She knew some of it was from fans of Ira’s, but she also could tell it was genuine. The day after they received their nominations saw her running desperately into her home office to go over and analyze reports for metrics in engagement, comments, likes, shares, etc., for all of her most recent works to confirm to her most assuredly that her nomination was not some sick joke or fraud.
“And the winner is…,”
There was a ringing sound in Tawan’s ears all of a sudden that made her feel like she was falling down a spiraling hole. It felt like time had slowed and she was stumbling through the dark like she was drunk or something, as if she was staggering and reaching out for something to balance herself. She did not know why she was being what she felt like was so dramatic, but she also knew how important this particular award was for her and what it meant for her career.
Winning something like this would make her feel like she was an actual writer. It would bring back that scent she used to chase back in her early journalism days when speaking truth to power scratched an itch in her brain. All of her hard work and the difficult but great experiences she endured would have led to this moment.
Suddenly, Tawan felt Ira pushing on her shoulder like she was desperately trying to wake her up from a coma or deep sleep or something.
The blood rushed and drained out of her ears, and the ringing started to subside to a dull pound in the back of her head as she turned to her. The room was bouncing as the crowd cheered and yelled and whistled, and Tawan quickly swallowed as she looked to Ira to ask what was going on. Ira’s heart skipped at her doe-eyed expression.
“You won, baby!” Ira cheered, clapping and grinning in her face.
Tawan thought she was talking to someone else. “W-what?” She asked, blinking her eyes a few times.
Ira laughed as she bounced in her seat then reached over to grab her hands to pull on her to stand up. Tawan gulped and turned around to nervously wave and genuinely give thanks to everyone as they congratulated her. The more she acknowledged people and their response to her win, the more she started to accept that this was real and she had accomplished this on her own merit. A governing body of prestigious and respected people from around the country thought that she was deserving of such an honor and award.
Tawan became overwhelmed by her emotions and turned to Ira to lean down to hug her, holding the back of her neck and whispering how much she loved, appreciated, and cared for her. She pressed a kiss to the spot between the back of her jaw and her neck, whispered a few more sweet nothings, then kissed the corner of her mouth before standing again. Ira was left speechless at how gentle and caring and earnest she sounded - how vulnerable and affectionate she was being in public to her.
Before she left the table, Tawan nodded at Mali and gave Meena a back hug from her seat as she clapped for her and a few happy tears for her business partner sprang to her eyes. She knew that she would not have made it to this moment without the support and dedication of her team, so she was very happy that Meena was able to attend when she asked her to come to the ceremony. Tawan shakily reached her hand over her stomach to nervously button her suit jacket as she ascended the stairs to the stage.
She went to stand by the microphone, staring at the trophy the whole time as the award presenter handed it to her.
“Oh, wow,” Tawan said to herself into the microphone as she observed the trophy. “I just looked at Ira’s and I still can't believe its this big.”
The venue laughed boisterously at her very honest reaction and Tawan shyly flashed them a charming smile as she adjusted the microphone to her liking. Ira laughed between cheers and clapping her hands as loud as she could in hopes that she could pick her out of the crowd. It was like she was at the twins soccer games.
“Um, where to start…,” Tawan said to herself then cleared her throat. “I want to first say thank you to the voters, the nominees, and this prestigious institution for all of its hard and dedicated work."
The crowd clapped in acknowledgement, a few whistles and cheers coming from them, as well. Ira had her hands clasped under her chin as she smiled adoringly up to her person, a few tears already slipping down her cheeks.
"Thank you to my mentor and an industry legend, Lily, for taking a chance on me. I can never repay you for all that you have done for me," she continued, a lump forming in her throat in remembrance. "Thank you to my old team at Vibe/Me and my new team at FleurDe. It is you that has made this possible. You always guide me on how to be the best leader, the best support system, and a genuine, empathetic person. Thank you for always believing in me and my vision.”
The crowd applauded and whooped, and Tawan, eyes glistening again, smiled and nodded at those she mentioned having their moment. Ira and Mali smiled over at Meena as they clapped knowing how much this means to her hard work, as well.
“My family and friends have been so very influential in my life,” Tawan continued, shifting her weight to her left foot. “My friends, you have so patiently helped me think through a lot of things so that I can be better and I owe you forever. Especially my business partner and sister, Meena, whom I can’t wait to work with to be back up here on this stage again with next year. To my family - especially to you, my parents and my big brother - your unwavering love and support has always carried me. I love all of you more than you could ever know.”
Tawan swallowed then looked to the crowd to smile as they applauded a very touching moment. Meena had her hand to her mouth to try to control her emotions as she looked to her mentor and best friend. Ira, hands clasped under her chin as she watched the love of her life, smiled a little watery as she thought about how loved she knew Tawan was by those same people.
“So, I know I won’t be able to top my wife’s speech about our family…,” Tawan started, quickly letting out her signature laugh making everyone laugh harder. “No, no. Just kidding. I’m only really even standing here right now in front of you because of my wife and our twins. My family is my inspiration, my purpose, and my reminders. When I feel like I'm undeserving of praise or things like this achievement, they are my encouragement.”
Tawan got choked up, so she paused and the crowd started clapping and whooping harder some encouraging words that made her smile. This was the most important part of her speech for herself because of what it meant for her journey so far. Ira put her hand over her mouth as she watched her collect herself and be praised.
“To my children, I love you more than words can say. Use this moment as a reminder that you can do anything you set your mind to. That’s why Momma keeps making you practice your high kicks in karate and your bicycle kicks in soccer,” Tawan said into the camera, making everyone laugh. “And to my wife, Ira. I would spend an eternity telling you something new about why I love and adore and appreciate you so much. You make every day an exciting adventure. I love you forever, my butterflies.”
Ira tried not to react in fear of making her makeup run, but she knew it was foolish to think she could.
Mali reached over to her with tissues so she could carefully dab at her eyes as Tawan finished her speech to a loud, standing applause. Mali and Meena leaned over to Ira to clap and express how good they thought Tawan’s speech. Mali, who would sometimes act like Tawan’s unofficial manager since they were usually all attending events together lately, told Ira she would go to her and help guide her through any interview processes.
“You guys cleaned house,” Meena praised Ira again, reaching over to high-five her.
“It’s almost too good to be true,” Ira laughed and nodded in agreement.
Ira smiled as she settled back into her seat, adjusting her dress and flicking it around her legs to her liking. As she waited on Tawan to return so she could give her a proper congratulations, she reminded herself that this was still just the beginning for the both of them.
__________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
“My feet hurt,” Ira winced, putting a hand on her wife’s shoulder for balance. She took turns picking each foot up to relieve the pressure from the heels.
Tawan looked to her, breaking away from the conversation she was listening to with a group of other winners.
They were all mingling at the after party of the awards show and Ira realized she had been passed around from brand representatives to television executives to various CEOs who wanted to meet her and praise her win for the night. Some were already familiar with her growing popularity and offered their praises in that regard, as well.
All of the moving around, however, had her feet sore and her lower back was starting to beg her to sit down.
Ira’s frowning face that would occasionally wince when she worked out a sore area in her body made Tawan immediately grab her hand to lead them back to their table. She thought they were just going to sit down for a while, but Tawan pulled her chair out to face hers as she instructed her to sit. Ira watched quizzically as her wife lifted her right foot through the slit of her dress, careful to not expose anything on accident, and undid her heel to remove it.
Tawan dropped the heel to the floor then quickly squeezed her foot like a massage before she did the same to the other one.
“You can wear my shoes,” Tawan offered, smiling assuredly at her. She removed her platform loafers and slipped them onto her wife’s feet before putting her heels on to wear for herself.
Even if Ira wanted to protest, which she did but was too focused on her sore feet, Tawan was too smooth and swift for her to register and realize what she was doing. She watched as Tawan made sure the heels were securely strapped to her feet before flicking her dress around her feet to hide her shoes as best as she could. Tawan patted her knees in satisfaction then looked up to Ira to smile sweetly before standing and extending her hand down to her.
“I don’t want your feet or back to hurt either,” Ira pouted in worry, looking up at her.
“It’s okay,” Tawan laughed and shook her hand at her. “We’ll leave soon, I promise. Just 30 more minutes, okay?”
Tawan wanted to do nothing more than to leave the party so they find a late night noodle shop and celebrate with Mali and Meena. That was still the plan they had made once the ceremony ended, but they also knew they had to attend the after party. It was a chance for them to promote their win and expose themselves to the countries most influential figures to make some meaningful and profound connections.
Tawan especially wanted this for Ira since she was gearing up for a full year of what she had experienced in these last few short months.
“I just need to rest my back for a little while then we can switch back,” Ira promised, taking her hand and standing.
“Keep them,” Tawan stated simply, leading them back to their group.
Ira smiled as she threaded their fingers together and watched her lead them back to the party. She could not wait for them to head back to the SUV with Mali and Meena to leave and find something to eat and drink the night away in celebration.
Ira tucked some of Tawan’s hair behind her ear as she explained something about a piece she wrote to a newspaper editor. She smiled affectionately at her as she enthusiastically talked about her favorite topic before she reached around to flick her hair on the opposite side of her shoulder behind her back.
Tawan nodded along to a journalist telling her about some stories they had wrote last week when she felt Ira’s hand cup her left hip. Her thumb caressed her there and she tried not to lose her focus thinking about how her stomach grew warm and the nerves of her spine tingled. Ira was not really paying attention to what discussions were going on around her since she was mostly scoping out the place to note all the guests.
There were a lot of really important, classy people in the room and she was still shocked she was considered one of them.
“I’m going to the restroom,” Ira said by her wife’s ear, squeezing her hip. “Do you want me to grab you anything on my way back?”
“I’ll come with you,” Tawan said as she turned to her but was stopped.
“No, you keep talking,” Ira smiled assuredly, moving to rub her lower back. “You’re having fun. I’ll be right back.”
Tawan still looked unsure about her being by herself somewhere unfamiliar, but Ira just chuckled and grabbed her face to give her a kiss. Ira waited until she opened her eyes so she could give her one last smile to reassure her that she would be fine. Tawan smiled back and nodded then closed her eyes to lean to her again making Ira giggle as she pressed another kiss to her lips.
She was glad that they switched shoes because she did not have to worry about tripping or falling to rush to the bathroom as quickly as she could.
Ira weaved her way though the crowd as fast as she could considering that many people stopped her to say something. Just before she emerged from the crowd to head to the bathroom, she spotted Mali talking to some television executives she had met earlier that night. She was reminded to head to her for her clutch to take with her.
Ira respectfully bowed to the executives before asking Mali for her clutch so she could go to the bathroom. Everyone offered Ira another round of congratulations and she thanked them before slipping away. She then headed in the direction the signs pointed to for the nearest bathroom and was glad there were only a few people at this one.
A few of the women there gave her congratulations and they chatted a bit as they waited for a stall. She was in and out of the bathroom in less than five minutes, so she smiled to herself in the mirror by the sink as she washed her hands. She watched as the water ran over her hands and cooled her flushed body from all of the excitement and the few cocktails she had consumed a moment ago.
Her mind flashed to her and Tawan surprising Star and Sammy with the trophies and how excited they were going to be. They told them all the way up until they were dropped off at Ira’s parents house how much they loved them and were proud of them and to kick whoever or whatever’s butts they needed to, to win. All they wanted to do now that the pressure and expectations of tonight were completed was relax and recharge with their children for a day or two.
This also meant that they were very close to their much needed getaway for New Year's.
Ira smiled thinking about so many good things to come as reached for her clutch to pull out her lipstick. She applied some and then closed it to put away in her clutch again as she popped her lips to spread it. Ira smiled at her reflection, glad she was the only one in the bathroom now so she could take a moment for herself.
She winked at herself in the mirror then grabbed her clutch and used paper towels to throw away before grabbing the door handle to exit. She was perusing her clutch for some mints when she felt a strong hand grab her bicep.
“Hey!” Ira yelped and yanked her arm back. “What the fu-,”
Ira came face-to-face with none other than Lai and her eyes fluttered as she fell back a step at something flashing in her memory.
Lai had a deep, dark scowl on her face as if a shadow was casted over it. Her hands that now rested on her hips and the fingers that pinched her there as she stared at Ira were pulsing. It was as if she could see something rippling off her body, something dark and foreboding.
Ira felt a familiar and alert sensation, the kind that only she could produce, as she swallowed hard and stood straighter to appear not as scared as her stomach felt. The twitch up her lower back that she had not felt in ten years made her curl up and back into the corner like a cornered animal. She looked around for anyone or a quick escape but saw nothing that could help her.
“I have nothing to say to you,” Ira choked out, her throat tightening in fear. She moved to step around her as quickly as she could.
Lai quickly grabbed her bicep again and roughly pushed her back. “Well I have something to say to you,” she grunted, stepping to her to close the space.
Ira stared at her fearfully as she winced and grabbed her arm to rub it with a shaky hand. “Y-you’re scaring me,” she said nervously, putting her hand up between them.
“All I wanted was a real chance with you, Ira,” Lai started, stepping to her darkly. “All I wanted was a chance to show you how I could give you the world. How I can take care of you like you’re supposed to be taken care of. To show you how we have something special, Ira. All you have to do is give it a chance.”
“Fuck off, Lai,” Ira growled and pushed her back, her courage pushed by her anger. “I will never want you. Ever! I never want to see you again. You tried to destroy my marriage and ruin my children’s lives in the process. You hurt my wife to get to me. I hate even the sight of you! You’re lucky we are choosing to move on from all of that.”
“What did you say to me?” Lai said quietly, her icy tone eerily laced with venom.
Ira, emboldened, stepped to her and got in her face. “You. Heard. Me,” she bit out, relaying her message with her angry wild eyes.
Lai searched her eyes as her nose inhales picked up pace. “You don’t mean that,” she warned, her voice shaking.
“I have meant it for the last ten years,” Ira responded immediately, her mouth swirled in rage and fearlessness.
Lai searched her eyes again, hoping and begging that she was lying to her. There was no way that she could mean such horrible and terrible things about her or them. Not when she was still here before her practically begging her to give her another chance and hoping she would honor their past.
She deluded herself into thinking that Ira was always waiting on her, always the one thing she could come back to and make feel special. What she never paid attention to, however, was that Ira was not like the other girls she dated.
Ira told Lai every single time that she asked to get back together that there was nothing about them that was compatible for a romantic relationship. Sure they had some similarities, but Ira valued much a deeper connection with someone who knew what she was thinking before she said it and knew what she needed just by looking at her. That was why she was so entranced and enamored by Tawan when she first met her because she was already looking at her like she was connecting her dots.
“This is my last time warning you, Lai. You stay away from me and my family…or I will go to the authorities for an injunction,” Ira promised, standing straight and not backing down.
Lai’s breathing became erratic in her chest as she finally saw that Ira was serious about her leaving her life and never seeing her again.
She actually figured that since she never received an angry phone call from her father plus no trouble from the law when she left for New York after college that Ira still cared about her. If Ira never reported or told on her then she had to have still cared about her. Even when she saw Ira talking to friends after class a few days later with a wrist brace and some of the bruises poking out of it on her left arm she still believed there was a chance.
In her ignorance, it never once crossed her mind that Ira only kept the law from bringing her back on charges of assault because she was embarrassed she let it happen and ashamed of the potential scandal. She had been living in her fantasy world truly alone and never had a chance to win Ira’s heart. Ira meant every word she said that she was a happily married mother of two children. They were her life and she would give hers for them without hesitation.
Lai’s stomach now boiled rather than churned like it had been when she was around her the last few months.
Ira could see that her message had finally seeped into her brain so she rolled her eyes and moved to brush past her.
Suddenly, there was a very strong grip on her forearm and she cried out in pain at how it felt like what she could only imagine a boa constrictor squeezing the life out of its prey felt like. Though she worked out consistently and felt capable in her strength, she immediately felt small and unable to defend herself. She tried to wrench her arm free but every time she pulled she felt like her bones were cracking.
Ira's forearm was unexpectedly twisted and she was suddenly whirled around and yanked to be forced close into something hard, crying from the back of her throat in excruciating pain.
Lai had an evil, dark, menacing look on her face with her teeth set on edge as her grip on Ira’s forearm squeezed her bones. Her body was shaking with rage and envy at being denied what she felt was rightfully hers. Ira’s eyes met her darkened, almost dilated-like pupils, and a pained and terrified whimper escaped the back of her throat.
To her, it was like staring at a monster that wanted to chew her up and swallow her. It was like staring into the eyes of death.
Ira had never seen such a thing in her life ever, and it made her cower as her heart beat out of her chest and her blood ran cold. She wanted to scream so badly at the top of her lungs, but she was paralyzed by fear and her arm feeling like it was breaking with even the slightest movement. The merciless and intense pressure on her arm froze her in place and she closed her eyes to brace herself, unsure of what was to come as a silent sob escaped her and her arm blazed like fire.
Just as her tears squeezed through her tightly closed eyes, there was a whoosh of wind like something pushed her back, and she blinked a few times.
“Fuck! My arm!”