The Storm
Chapter 5: The Storm
“How long has he been here?”
Tawan was shrugging off her grey suit jacket as she stared nervously out her office window to the conference room. Meena was looking in the same direction as she explained that Mr. Tek had arrived before Dao even opened the office that morning and had been in the conference room the whole time. All she knew, according to Dao, was that he was studying their white board of notes and going through the papers that had been left on the table.
Tawan now wished she had removed everything Friday afternoon before leaving, but she did not want to make the mistake of forgetting to take something important back for the presentation come Monday morning.
“Fuck,” Tawan cursed, causing Meena to jump and look to her.
Tawan rarely lost her cool, but to also use profanity of this extreme was out of character for her. At least, as Meena knew personally due to their outside work relationship, not at work. But they knew how important this presentation was and how difficult the scrutinization of his approval process. Neither woman wanted to be the bad guy in having to tell the team that they had to toss out all the hard work they had already completed to have to go back and start from the beginning.
Everyone was at their breaking point due to the last five out of seven issues they worked on being mostly scrapped by him.
“You would think with how well your issues performed versus his that he would just shut the hell up and sit back and enjoy being a rich asshole or something,” Meena said, looking from him back to her.
Tawan darted her eyes to her and took a second before laughing tiredly. “Sorry about that,” she apologized, smiling shyly.
Meena waved her off and crossed her arms under her chest. “Please. I’ve said worse,” she said and stepped to the door.
Tawan smoothed the arms of her navy blue turtleneck sweater then the thighs of her grey suit pants. She took a deep, preparing breath as she flicked her hair behind her back, her eyes darting to her boss, and dabbed the back of her hand on her perspiring forehead. Meena watched her, just as nervous as she was, then reached for the door handle as she knew it was showtime.
Tawan grabbed her iPad from her desk and opened it, grabbing the pencil from its slot ash she rounded her desk towards her mission. Meena opened the door and Tawan mumbled a distracted thanks as she went through her iPad and tapped on it, deep in concentration. Though she wished this did not feel like as big of a deal as it does, because no one should feel this stressed behind a job, her need for perfection always beat her. Lily had put so much stock into her and what she could bring to the table with her promotion.
Not only did she not want to let her down, she really did not want to let her team down because they worked so hard for her. She could never thank them enough.
Mr. Tek sat at the head of the table near the door, stiff as a board and sifting through some papers in front of him. He looked bored, but Tawan knew that he had a million questions and suggestions behind that facade. She knew that he did not appear at the office as early as he did if he did not want to prepare his remarks before even viewing the presentation. This only ever happened a few times, and those instances were only because he was in town the day before instead of away on business for a conference call.
“Good morning, everyone,” Tawan greeted, trying to hide her nervous smile as she made her way to the front. “Mr. Tek.”
Mr. Tek looked up at her then back to his papers. “Good morning,” he said in a low grunt.
Meena blew out a hard and frustrated sigh, placing her hands in her lap as she rolled her eyes to turn to her boss. The owner always seemed to be in a sour mood and his responses to others always bordered on disrespectful and rude. Tawan tightly pursed her lips and gave a curt nod before hooking her iPad to the cord connected to the television next to the whiteboard.
She hated that she was always surprised by his gruffness, an attitude that reflected the face of a bulldog and possessed none of the personality of gentle curiosity.
Just as Tawan felt like snapping her pencil in half to alleviate some stress, Meena smiled at her and gave her a thumbs up. She returned it and looked around to her other senior team members for issue launches, all six of them, and they smiled at her eager to hear one of her notorious and famous presentations. Tawan had built and fortified a well built castle that recognized everyone's strengths and weaknesses to apply them where they best fit for their collective success.
No ones contribution went unnoticed with her.
The presentation lasted no longer than 15 minutes as part of her strategy. Tawan understood that she had a limited window to construct and time the summer issue launch. This was meticulously planned because that window was even smaller when presenting to Mr. Tek who seemed to have an attention span of five minutes. Though he had a blank and unreadable face as he looked between his notes he was taking and Tawan, her team’s reactions to her presentation reinforced in her that she was on the right track.
This was a solid effort by the entire office, a team that consisted of 18 employees that kept this archaic magazine afloat.
“So, we predict that we can increase the subscription base by 13% over the course of the summer,” Tawan informed, swiping her screen then looking to the television to point. “This would put us well within the margin of the goal we are aiming to hit before the end of the year.”
“We need to hit the margin in two months,” Mr. Tek said, his gruff voice cutting the room.
Tawan, mouth half open and pointing at a graph as she got ready to speak again, looked to him as did the rest of the room. He just blankly stared at her, arms crossed over his chest as she sat causally in his seat waiting to hear how she planned to do that. She was confused because that was not the goal they had set at the beginning of the year - with him, oddly enough - and she looked to Meena with furrowed eyebrows.
Meena shrugged, just as confused as she was, then grabbed her own iPad to scroll through her notes.
“U-uh, Mr. Tek,” Tawan stuttered a bit, looking at her friend out of the corner of her eye. “We planned for an end-of-the-year subscription list that was a 20% increase of last year’s final number. We are only 12% away from that goal.”
“Yes,” Meena agreed as she turned her iPad for everyone to see. “I have the minutes here. We all agreed that 20% was manageable.”
“We have been in the red for far too long now,” he said icily, sitting up and leaning onto the table with his elbows as he looked around. “If we stay here any longer then we risk going under. I am sure no one wants that right now with how bad the economy can be lately.”
Meena looked to Tawan who stiffened at his words, jutting her chin as she clasped her hands behind her back. Whether he was insinuating that this longevity in the negative was her fault or not made no difference to her as she saw the numbers, too, and placed the blame squarely on her shoulders. But what made her upset was that he was the reason she blamed herself because no matter how much she stood up to him, he always had the final say.
He overstepped his role as the owner more than one should, and she was still trying to figure out how to battle and win against him. Even though none of this mess was solely her fault, she personally bore most of the blame and it broke her spirit sometimes.
Tawan cleared her throat, setting her iPad down on the podium next to the television and stepped back to her end of the table. She placed her fingertips on it, focusing on the coolness of the wood and took a quick second to close her eyes in preparation. She tried to control her emotions as she could feel the last two years of stress bubbling to the surface.
Her team had worked so hard on this presentation - three weeks of extensive preparation for this moment - and she could sense he was getting ready to scrap it.
“Mr. Tek,” Tawan started, standing straight and forcing a smile. “The team worked very hard for the last month to put this together. It not only is a very good foundation for the summer launch issue, it is something we can build off of for the remainder of the year.”
“If that were true then we would have had this at the beginning of the year,” he countered, pushing his papers away. “I think we need to reevaluate. We need something…groundbreaking.”
Tawan looked at him in disbelief as her team tried to contain their groans and frustrations. The summer launch issue was roughly six weeks away, and with the rest of the team working to ensure they maintained their schedule up until that launch, everyone was stretched thin. If they had to remain on this schedule any longer, Tawan was worried the team morale would drop critically low and in turn affect their performance negatively.
This would only further what Mr. Tek was talking about when he said the magazine could go under.
“Mr. Tek, we cannot afford for the team to keep being stretched as thin as it is right now to accommodate for the summer launch issue,” Tawan argued, leaning on her hands flatly on the table. “If we want to give our best then we should go with the issue I just presented then build off of that.
“Tawan, if we don’t do something now then there won’t be a team to build off of,” he retorted, the coldness in his voice cutting the room as he stood. “My word is final. Everyone, try again.”
The room sighed and tried to not have an emotional reaction as they stood to grab their things and head out in frustration at yet another waste of their time. Tawan swallowed hard, driving her tongue into the roof of her mouth to stop from crying or cursing him out. She knew this meant more late nights and she thought about how she had made a promise to herself to be more attentive with the kids while Ira was away for work.
At the thought of her wife, she desperately wished that she was back in her arms in their bed as they enjoyed the morning sun rise through their open window like they did yesterday morning.
Meena was slow to gather her things as she watched Tawan deep in her thoughts. She worried her friend was going to stress herself to a health issue, something that almost happened around the beginning of the year when she kept skipping meals to have more time to work. She had fainted in the office late one night when it was just the two of them working on some final notes for a launch. Tawan had so much pressure and tension built in her body from all the meetings with Mr. Tek about that issue launch.
Ira almost went to Mr. Tek’s house to give him a peace of her mind or fist, having been there a few times for work parties and dinners, when Meena called to let her know what happened. Tawan was in no place to protest her friend looking out for her as she had no energy, having skipped lunch for the fourth time that week with not much nourishment the last few days. She had skipped breakfast at home, lying to Ira that she would grab something on the way, and would tell Ira she had grabbed dinner on the way home so she would not worry about her working in her home office some more.
Ira would have killed her herself if she was not so scared about her fainting episode, so instead she forced her to promise to eat the breakfast, lunch, and dinners she personally prepared for her.
“I’d like to speak to Tawan alone, Meena,” Mr. Tek said, smoothing his tie before looking to her.
Meena gave one last look to her friend who nodded. “Yes, sir,” she mumbled as she gave a quick head bow before leaving.
As soon as the door closed behind Meena, Tawan felt the tension in the room cover every corner. Her boss was now walking up to the whiteboard, hands behind his back, and studying the numbers that she knew he already had saved in his brain. Her annoyance was starting to prick her nerves and making her ears ring as blood rushed to them, so she closed her eyes tightly. She blew out a breath and went to grab her iPad before returning back to her papers on the conference table.
“What did you need to speak about, sir?” She asked tightly since he was purposefully slow to start the conversation he asked for.
Mr. Tek hummed as he inspected the numbers and Tawan started to feel like he was not even looking at anything worth his time. It was as if he was exerting dominance by only moving and speaking on his terms. His arrogance had been weighing on Tawan for quite some time now, and no matter how expert the council that Lily provided once a month was, she felt like she was moments away from snapping on him.
No one would be able to work for him and fulfill his expectations unless they sold themselves for less. Tawan refused to sell herself that short and not trust her instincts.
“I am headed to a conference in New York tomorrow,” he stated, not turning from the board. “There will be a lot of experts in our industry from all over the world presenting ways to stay afloat in this new digital era.”
Tawan nodded, looking up to stare straight ahead while trying to relax her tongue from the roof of her mouth. She did not know why he decided to share his travel plans nor did she care. He went to conferences and luncheons all the time and did not seem to retain and apply any of the important, crucial pieces of information as evident by his ways never changing.
She looked to him from the corner of her eye, debating on speaking or waiting for him to. As far as she was concerned, she was done speaking to him and wanted to head to her office to search for a new job.
“Is that all, sir?” Tawan asked, trying to hide her disdain.
Mr. Tek leaned closer to the board and grunted. “I want a new presentation when I get back next week,” he ordered, ignoring her as she headed back to his seat.
“Next week?” She said, knowing that was impossible if they were wading in the fog. “Sir, with all due respect, you cannot expect us to have a fresh presentation from scratch when we don’t even know what it is we are aiming for.”
“Next week, Tawan,” he said with finality, putting his suit jacket on. “I return next Monday and I am expecting the summer issue launch that beats our competitors.”
“Mr. Tek, if you would just look at our presentation again then you will see that is already done,” she insisted, picking her iPad up to pull it back up.
“Your presentation was okay but it is not what I am thinking,” he retorted, shooting his cuffs. “I expect a new presentation Friday after next.”
“Can I email you the presentation and you take another look at it?” Tawan persisted, trying to show him her screen.
“Enough, Tawan,” Mr. Tek snapped, looking to her and slicing his hand through the air. “I’ve made my decision. Your presentation was good, but it is not the direction we need to head towards right now. Gather your team and try again.”
Tawan bit her tongue, defeat finally settling in like it tended to when having this argument with her boss. There was no changing his mind, ever. Once he had set his sights on something or came to a conclusion, the best she could do to stay afloat in her position was to do what he asked.
Despite her hating those people, the ones who always said yes and never stood for themselves, she was starting to come to the realization that maybe she was no different even if she did pushback some. All of her hard work, the journey it took to get to her position, was not what she had expected. Tawan’s regrets, all the time spent away from her family and their home, were all sacrificed for nothing.
And that was threatening to break the damn she had built to protect herself from that realization.
“I’ll see you soon,” Mr. Tek said with a gruff and exited the conference room.
The air in the room that he had sucked out when he entered it that morning had immediately returned, but not much as Tawan felt a dry sob in her chest.
Meena must have been around the corner waiting because she immediately entered the conference room, slipping through the door as it shut behind Mr. Tek. She approached her friend who had sat down in her chair and turned towards the white board. Meena slowly approached her and her heart ached at the sight of Tawan, who’s eyes were brimming with frustrated tears.
When Tawan saw her out of her peripheral, she turned a little from her to sneakily wipe at her eyes to clear them.
“Hey,” Meena coaxed, stopping in her tracks to give her privacy. “What did he say this time?”
“You don’t wanna know,” Tawan said quietly, quickly and sneakily sniffing before standing again. “He wants us to present something new next Monday.”
“Oh, come on!” Meena groaned, putting her hands on her hips. “He can’t be serious. That is damn near impossible at this point.”
“I know,” Tawan agreed, tone laced with defeat and tiredness. “I tried explaining that to him, but he won’t listen.”
Meena sighed and stared at her, trying to read her mind. “I know, I know. You tried your hardest and that was all you can do with him,” she said, sighing again.
“A lot of good it does me,” Tawan grumbled and stacked her things on one another on the table. “I don’t even know where to start. I can’t even think about it right now. Ira leaves in a few days for Paris and I promised my kids I would spend more time with them. I don’t want her to worry or else she will back out of it.”
“Fuck, Tawan,” Meena said, tutting her tongue knowingly. “Look, we’ll figure something out. We always do.”
“I am sick of always having to figure something out, Meena,” Tawan groaned and rubbed her temples.
Meena flinched some at the clip in her tone causing Tawan to close her eyes tightly before looking back to her to raise her hand in apology. She never had to apologize to her because Meena understood what it took to get her here which tended to be rare as Tawan was always so cool, calm, and collected. Mr. Tek just had a way of pushing everyone's buttons to the point that he could make them explode.
It was a wonder no one had not already strangled him after a disgruntled episode caused by him.
As she watched her friend try to calm her emotions and gather herself, she thought about the idea they had conjured up at lunch last week. It was also created in the midst of the chaos of trying to meet Mr. Tek’s expectations, but it was a solid, creative, groundbreaking idea that the archaic paper needed. Because the more Mr. Tek had final say on issue launches, the more the magazine slipped behind fresh, exciting launches from their competitors.
Tawan had been trying to tell him this, but he ignored her pleas and dismissed her concerns.
“I think we should do Project Omega,” Meena said, a sudden surge in confidence. “I think we should bring the team in on it first thing tomorrow morning and have the presentation ready by the end of the week.”
“Project Ome-,” Tawan started, confused but then was hit with realization. “What? No way. We made that up on a whim because we were upset at lunch.”
“And for good reason, too,” Meena insisted, placing her palms flat on the table. “We didn’t just come up with those ideas because we were emotional. They are things we have talked about for our future magazine launch. It has everything we need and we can combine some of the current project if we have to, to make it whole. It’s solid.”
Tawan stared at her in thought, unsure if she was serious or had just lost her mind. They were joking around at lunch about ideas for their future magazine, something they often did when they were stressed at their real job. It let their creative juices flow and their muscles would loosen, feeling less restricted. Though many of their proposals they would bounce off each other during this time were outlandish, they were not too far fetched when reevaluated with some critical thinking.
“We talked about what fashioned looked like 100 years from now across the globe,” Tawan reminded her, blinking her eyes incredulously. “We talked about flying cars and space colonies. ‘Can space helmets be fashion or are they just for safety?’”
“And it was a good things to think about,” Meena persisted. “So we don’t do 100 years from now. We do, say, five years or ten years from now. What does fashion look like then? What are the conversations we are having? Do things really repeat every few decades? What does the industry look like and who now will be leading it. It’s all strong stuff - stuff I see online all the time.”
Tawan sat on her musings, looking up at the corner. “Hm, well that makes more sense,” she thought out loud.
Meena bit down on her bottom lip hard, trying to contain the excitement that threatened to burst from her. She could see Tawan, who may hesitate at first but is always open to some transformative ideas, wheel start to turn. When that happened, her boss was processing every possibility, good and bad, as she considered and weighed their options carefully.
No matter how many times Mr. Tek shot her down, Tawan never let it take away from her belief that the ideas she and her team had created were the best work. She knew the grumpy, arrogant man was out of his league when it came to the industry as it stood now. Tawan knew she had her finger on the pulse of the market and what readers were after.
The hard part was convincing Mr. Tek that she knew that.
“At this point, there is nothing else that I can think of that would make him green light us either way,” Tawan said, accepting this truth and looking back to her.
“So we bet on ourselves?” Meena asked, reaching her fist out expectantly.
Tawan looked at her hand and then back up to her. Meena looked at her, hopeful she was leaning where she thought she was. At this point, they had nothing else to lose except their dignity.
“We bet on ourselves,” Tawan said, nodding as she reached out to bump her fist.
Meena smiled triumphantly then they prayed to themselves that they came out on top of this risky decision.