Severus hadn’t expected to become a parent at the age of twenty-nine. In fact, he hadn’t expected to become a father, ever. Godfather of one brat was close enough for him. And yet-he had.
There are times that he doesn’t know what he’s doing. For having taught eleven through eighteen-year old's for the past eight years, it should have been easier. Especially seeing as he’s been teaching at a boarding school. Instead, he finds himself constantly worrying he’s doing something wrong, watching his words- attempting to be a good role model.
He doesn’t know what Lily was thinking. Or Potter, for that matter. He hadn’t been friends with Lily in years, by the time she died. Even if he’d still loved her-he'd certainly thought she’d forgotten him. Yet, just before his birthday last year, certain events took place, that caused him to take in the young Potter brat. Not that he was a brat at all times-no more than any other child, at least.
Something in his magic-that later he would identify as the bond he hadn’t known about- had urged him to find Harry Potter. Something wasn’t right. He’d attempted to ignore it (oh, how he regretted that now). Attempted to calm himself with draughts, to brew to get his mind off of it. In the end, he was not successful in ignoring the growing anxiety in the pit of his stomach.
He’d gone in search of Harry Potter, and had not liked what he’d found. Tuney-what was that old man thinking, putting Lily’s child with Tuney? What he’d found, made him wish for his Death Eater days when he could openly torture Muggles. Or at least kill them. Neglected, half-starved Harry, with wide green eyes that reminded him of the boy’s mothers. Only with a pain that Severus knew himself, thanks to his father.
He’d had bruises littering his skin and glasses that were falling off of his face.
Suffice it to say, Severus’ heart had dropped out of his chest and he’d cringed inwardly when the child had flinched away from him. When he’d had to coax him out of the Cupboard. He’d stunned the damned woman and her obese family. Sent for Auror’s and proceeded on to St. Mungo’s to have the too small child treated.
Will’s were looked at and- surprise of Severus’ life- He was named secondary Godfather, should Sirius be unavailable. While Severus had not expected to become a father full time instead of just Godfather- he took his duties seriously after that. He made sure that the young child knew to come to him with problems-something that took a great deal of months to do. The first time of which, Severus’ heart had swelled in pride that the child had finally, finally looked to him for help. It was the first moment that hit him hard-the moment that opened his eyes to the fact that he’d fallen in love with the quiet, cautious child.
Especially when it was something so precious and heartbreaking, as having a nightmare (Nightmemory, more like)-and asking to share Severus’ bed. From the way that Harry had been fidgeting, angled towards the door, it was obvious that he thought he’d be punished. But was attempting anyway. Trying to trust the new adult in his life.
Severus had simply pulled up the covers and moved over on the bed. It was the first time, but certainly not the last that his charge had come to him at night. In the past three months, Harry had started to occasionally not even bother to wake Severus up-just crawl in.
There were other moments with those heartwarming effects on Severus. Same as there were moments when his heart broke. When Harry would flinch. The first time when Severus woke up with Harry in his home, to find him cooking and cleaning. Having to explain to the child that he was just that. A child. Not meant to cook for Severus. And not meant for chores either-because the Hogwarts Elves would take care of that. He’d had to explain to Harry that the only thing he needs to do, is focus on his schoolwork and clean up after himself. And be a child.
Harry had looked so lost when Severus tried to explain.
Severus got him tutors-and expected reluctance from the child (not complaining, no Harry hasn’t complained yet. It worries Severus). Instead, Harry had lit up at the idea of learning. “There’s no Dudley here.” He’d explained. “I don’t have to pretend to be dumber than him.”
While the child wasn’t genius level, he was a very smart child-and with Severus and his tutor’s encouragements of good study habits, Severus believed Harry would do very well in the future. Harry had brought his first report card, shuffling shyly, but looking expectantly at Severus. Emerald eyes glimmering with hesitant hope and giddiness. Almost perfect scores on his subjects and Severus was very careful to shuffle Harry’s hair fondly. To tell him good job. Another time when his heart warmed as that was when Harry first leaned into a touch, outside of his nighttime visits after nightmares.
Now, here Severus was, nearing a year later, with Harry Potter. This time next year, Harry would be attending Hogwarts, instead of living there because his new Guardian was. Severus had gotten Harry a broom for his birthday- one which he was only allowed to ride whilst Severus was present at Hogwarts, or when the Elves watched over him at Malfoy Manor, when Narcissa and Lucius babysat Harry with Draco.
That was another thing that both been heartbreaking and warming. Because while Harry had very much enjoyed the present-it had also been his first. He’d reacted much the same as when Severus had bought the child his own clothes. He’d cried and grinned, clutching the items to himself closely. Thanked Severus.
This Holiday...for Yule, Severus planned something different. While he’d also gotten Harry a few books (the boy was particularly fascinated by DADA books and Potions) as well as a broom kit-he'd also gone to the Ministry for something else. He’d gotten paperwork-for adoption. He’s not sure how Harry would take it, however. And he’s not sure he how he would handle rejection from the child-but he knows he would still be there for Harry regardless. The child that had somehow become a bright light in Severus’ life, which had been so very bleak not even a year ago.
“Stop fretting, Severus.” Minerva gives him a small smile. “I tell you; the boy will love the surprise.”
Dark eyes narrow on his fellow Professor. How Minerva had found out, he doesn’t know. He wouldn’t doubt that the Headmaster’s little workers in the Ministry told him-and perhaps he’d told his Deputy Headmistress. “I do not ‘fret,’ Minerva.” He drawls back, one eyebrow popping up.
“Oh yes, I forgot-you're just naturally brooding.” Minerva rolls her eyes.
“Obviously.” The man drawls back. “And for your information-I happen to be thinking of the mischief Harry has been getting into lately.” He adds, lying only a little.
“Oh?” The Gryffindor asks, warmth coloring her tone. “Has Harry finally grown into his heritage as prankster?”
Here, Severus sneers. As if his sweet little child could turn as malicious as those four. He shakes his head at his thoughts. “No. He’s taken to magicking my things out of my room.”
“Out of your room?”
He sighs. “Yes. I was almost bludgeoned in the head with one of my texts this morning.”
“You weren’t too harsh on the child?” the scots-lady beseeches, eyeing Severus.
He scowls. “I was not. In fact, I have yet to raise the issue yet, as it’s only been small things at random. And nothing overly...delicate or not meant for a child’s eyes.” He says.
Minerva snorts. “I didn’t take you for those kinds of magazines.”
“I am not-and if I were, I would place them under a strong ward. I wouldn’t chance Harry’s innocent eyes.” He drawls but does not explain that he meant darker books or perhaps his more adult themed novels.
--
Severus is very tired. He had thought that his ward would stop ‘accidentally’ summoning things of Severus’ out of his rooms by now. Nearing closer to Christmas, Hogwarts was becoming more frantic. Seeing as midterms and finals for semesters were coming up and being taken before the Holiday commenced. Tensions were high- and while Severus still took points from Gryffindor to help alleviate some of his stress-it did nothing for his worry that Harry may not like his upcoming gift. Not to mention dunderheads turning in essays that were entirely incorrect.
He is returning to his rooms just for a quick tea break-to see his ward and hopeful son. But when he opens the door and steps in, he can only thank his years as a spy and his reflexes that he dodges a cauldron flying from his room. But that was not the only thing, this time. He blinks rapidly as he attempts to dodge the assailing barrage of things. His things. His favorite cloak comes flying out, his quill set, the pajama set that the Malfoy’s had bought him two years ago-and a few other things.
He does dodge almost all of the suddenly magicked items, until his favorite photo album hits him in the chest, and he topples over. Pain laces up his spine from where he’d landed, and the pain naturally brings up his temper. His eyes flash open and he cuts his glare to the dark-haired boy. Only for his temper to immediately fade away at the scared look in green eyes, accompanied by worry.
“I’m...I’m sorry. Are you okay?” Harry asks him.
Severus takes a deep breath subtly and lets it out. Picking up the album, he lifts it as an indicator of what he was about to speak of-as well as his eyebrow shooting up. “What, are you doing?” He asks, exasperation entering his voice and his tiredness doubling.
“Er...Practicing and things?”
And things? Severus keeps his eyebrow raised. “You keep this up, and you’ll pull my entire room out here.” He tells the ten-year-old. “Or find something not meant for your eyes.” He stands up and waves his wand, neatly putting all of his things back where they belong.
Harry’s eyes twinkle a little, as he takes his robes in his child hands and folds his arms. “Not meant for a child’s eyes?” He asks in a drawl. “One might think you’re...” He drawls slowly, pausing for dramatic effect, “Up to something.” He finishes, an eyebrow rising.
Severus pinches the bridge of his nose with a sigh, even as he has to push down his slight amusement-he really couldn’t deal with this right now. He was too tired to look into the implications that Harry was picking up things from him. Obviously, the brat had been watching him try to prevent Weasley pranks one too many times. “Go outside and play, Harry.” He grumbles.
The small child blinks up at him, before nodding slowly. He goes to turn around and leave and Severus has to let out another sigh. “Warm clothes on first, Harry.” He reminds the child, whose ears redden.
Harry dashes into his room, coming out a mere two minutes later and dashing for the door. However, the boy pauses and tilts his head. His green eyes don’t quite meet Severus’ obsidian as he asks, “You are okay though?”
At first, Severus is confused. But then he remembers falling over and warmth spreads in his chest again. “Yes, child. Fear not, it takes more to hurt the dungeon bat.” He drawls.
The child tilts his head before looking over Severus one last time, before nodding again, pivoting, and running outside. No doubt to go join the Weasley snowball fight Severus had passed on his way here. He had not appreciated the twins on their first year here. But he had noticed them protecting his ward from unwarranted attacks from other Houses, solely because he was the Slytherin’s head of houses ward. They didn’t know it was Harry Potter they were pranking maliciously, or sending tripping hexes at, after all. Severus had wanted to hide Harry’s identity to afford him more protection. To not scare the skittish child.
Fred and George seem to have taken Harry under their wings, however. He doesn’t know how it came about, but he was now very grateful for their presence. Even if their influence had led to a more mischievous side of Harry.
If only he could figure out what this particular side was for- accidental magicking his things out of his rooms. Or rather, on purpose wandless magic.
He sighs as he calls for a warm cup of tea-asking the Hogwarts Elf to make hot cocoa for Harry and put it under stasis spell for him when he gets back inside. He sinks into his favorite chair-noting that it seems to have moved a few inches from its usual spot-and pulls the warm tea up to his mouth.
--
He writes to Lucius about it-but gets a reply from Narcissa instead. Some nonsense that she thinks it’s adorable- as well as hinting at already knowing why his son-his ward was doing it. ‘you’ll see, it’s quite precious, Sev.’ she wrote.
Not that it answered his question completely, but it does hint to the fact that Harry was at least doing it on purpose. For a reason. He’s unsure if he should attempt to figure out that reason is-or if he should allow the boy to continue. Seeing as Narcissa had hinted that he would see anyway.
For now, he allows his mind to sit on it on the back burner. The final exams were today-which means he already had tests to grade and focus his energy on. And his frustration. He knows he should expect the stupidity from the batch of dunderheads that he always had for every year. However, he was always exceedingly frustrated and astounded by the drivel they put into their essay portions. If they listened, they wouldn’t put the drivel they did on their exams. He didn’t understand how they couldn't see that if they didn’t listen, they would be a danger to themselves and anyone else around, when practicing Potions.
With another flick of red on parchment, he scowls. He needs a break. A quick stroll around the castle, or get some air. Hopefully, he did not run into these children specifically. He doesn’t know if he could hold back from deducting points from them for anything he could, after one had put that a sleeping potion needed ground pixie wings. Pixie wings! A known stimulant that fifth years should know by second year. The opposite of putting one to sleep! Not to mention, the ground pixie wings was combustible when put with fire flobberworths in the same potion. Which is why when the ingredients were needed together, to combat the combustion, you chopped the wings and put it in after the fire flobberworths were melted into the mixture with unicorn tears.
He’s still perturbed by the thought of fifth year students who thought that. But at least, they would not pass with O’s in his class-meaning he would not have to deal with those particular kinds of students by the next year. Or, at least not those specific ones. He’ll have another batch of dunderhead first years to make up for it next year, he’s sure.
As is typical in his strolls through the castle, especially around this time of year, students quieten and behave as he passes by-or flee right off to avoid being caught breaking a rule, or just caught by him on a bad day. However, there were hardly any students in the halls-which was new. Especially seeing as it was just after lunch. Children were always roaming the halls after that. But, he muses, perhaps this year they were all studying for their final exams.
He decides to take a detour outside. Perhaps go to the forbidden forest to gather more potions ingredients to brew. With that thought in mind-along with the potential that students were taking their studies seriously-Severus' mood lightens if only a little and he turns down a path to lead him to the outside.
Curiously, he wonders what his charge has been up to today. He usually gets the boy to tell him about this day over dinner. Lunch, if the boy didn’t plan on spending it with Fred and George. The first window to the outside opens up next to him and he glances out of it. There’s no fresh air or cold air for that matter, as they were charmed to not let it in in the Winter.
Snow covered the ground and the trees further off. But he also spots a gaggle of Gryffindor’s. He continues to stride forward until he sees them jeering and laughing at something. Laughter that he-as a former Slytherin student-knew all too well. A bit malicious and all mischievous.
Oh good. Whenever a group of Gryffindor’s were laughing at something like that, Severus knew that it meant trouble. Which means he could dock points. With his usual dower expression, Severus strides down the halls further, until he could take the exit and turn back around towards the troublemakers.
“Oi!” He steps onto the grass now facing the group of what he assumes is fifth and sixth years, judging by the few faces he could recognizes. The one’s to exclaim out were fast approaching the group as well. A pair of red headed second years had their wands out, pointed at the older years-anger clear on their faces, as well as worry. Brooms in their hands-obviously having been on the Quidditch field.
Which was surprising for a few reasons. One, the twins didn’t do worry-they did anger, but only through their pranks. So far, anyway. The second is as stated- they didn’t rush in, they waited, planned and then they pranked. Positively Slytherin in the act of revenge. It made a sense of urgency push into Severus’ steps.
“You wankers-get him down!”
“Back off, Weasley twits.” Mandoroy-a sixth year-scoffs.
Wands were raised in response to seeing the twins’ wands. Thankfully, this is when Severus comes up right behind the group now turned to the second years. “And what-” He sneers, “have we here?”
As expected, all of the brats stiffen. The bigger group of troublemakers whirling around quickly. Their faces were...more terrified than the usual brats have. Before anyone could say anything, one of the twins stumbled, arm with his broom outstretched-until the broom is ripped from his hand.
Everyone’s eyes follow it up-and up, and up- until-Severus' heart falls out of his chest. There, hanging from one of the statues spears-was his son. His arms outstretched but not looking panicked at all. Not like he should be-hanging from a hundred or so feet up in the air. Only held in place by the back of his robes.
Severus’ wand is up and he’s about to start casting, when he sees his son’s hand fill up with a broom. Which he uses to raise himself up-to unhook his clothes from the statue. Then, he pulls himself up a little with his arms, and throws his leg over the broom. Despite knowing his son was far better than any wizard who only learned brooms could fly eight months ago should be-despite knowing his son was better than most of the Quidditch players here at Hogwarts-Severus' heart does not slow down. He keeps his wand up-ready to cast if his son should fall.
He hasn’t known fear like this since...not ever. Not really. He’s feared for others, he’s feared for himself, but somehow-fearing for a s-ward, his ward (the one he wants to make his son officially), it was different. Far different. Close to the feeling of when he’d suspected he had lost Lily, without the devastation that had followed on confirmation. Yet still, somehow different.
“Harry.” The word was punched out of his chest, wheezed in fear. And then the boy was doing a loop before landing.
“That the best the oh-so brave Gryffindor’s have got?” Harry asks, Severus frozen in place as relief washes over him at the sight. His Harry on the ground, safe. “Almost killing someone five to six years your junior really makes you feel brave, hmm?” He raises a brow-so perfectly that Severus felt he was looking in a mirror at the action.
But he hardly cares about that in the moment. Instead, he’s falling to his knees and grabbing the dark-haired boy up in his arms. Holding him close, verifying that he was truly okay. His heart hurts when Harry flinches at the unexpected contact but settles for the warmth riddled after affect pounding from the adrenaline and fear when he feels Harry relax into him. “Hi.” His son whispers.
Severus’ eyes cut up to the stupid Gryffindor’s to see them looking absolutely petrified. He wanted to Bombarda them. He wanted to expel them-or at least give them detention over the break. But he knew he wouldn’t be allowed that. And even if he were-he wouldn’t waste his time with them, when he had Harry this Yule. “One hundred points from each of you!” He hisses. “And Detention for three weeks with your head of houses after you come back from the break.”
“What-you can’t do th-”
“I think you’ll find I can. I will be telling Professor McGonagall all about how you’ve just put the life of a ten year old boy-who doesn’t even have a wand to defend himself-in danger.” He seethes, still holding onto the small boy.
“Yeah-don’t you know-”
“Attempting to kill defenseless little kids-
“-Is something that one would expect from Death Eater’s...”
“Guess you guys should write home-”
“-Tell mummy and daddy that you’re ready to sign up for a cause-”
“-They were terrified of.” The twins sneer out.
The reminder of Death Eaters eats at Severus, but he brushes it away with Occlumency. Instead, he watches as the group leaves, grumbling to themselves, but fast paced. He also watches as the Red head’s look at him and his child, before nodding and leaving as well.
“You could have died.” Severus says, heart clenching at even the thought. He pulls back from his son, to look at him. “You-you weren’t even afraid.” He also states, disbelieving that the child wasn’t afraid.
Harry blinks up at his guardian in innocence. “Obviously.” He drawls, slow and clipped-an obvious attempt to copy his Guardian. “Because I knew that I’d be okay. I saw you.” He adds, far more earnestly. “You’ve always saved me before.”
Severus’ chest warms with the notion of trust. From an abused boy and to a spy. “Yes, Harry. And I will continue doing so. But never allow that to let you grow complacent, understand?”
The boy cocks his head to the side before nodding.
“That said-it was quick thinking, using that wandless Accio to retrieve a broom. Good job.”
The messy haired boy preens. “I’ve been practicing a lot because I-” He stops himself, eyes widening. Severus watches as green eyes are accentuated by red as the child blushes.
The man sighs. “I will allow you to keep your reasons to yourself for now.” Honestly, it was slightly adorable that the boy had flustered so easily. At the same time, now that the adrenaline has worn off he feels ten times more drained than before he’d taken a walk to clear his frustrations. And angry. A bit proud too, in his heart of hearts, he knows that it was extremely clever and impressive of Harry to be able to do such a thing-and to think on his feet. “For now, let us return to our living quarters.”
Harry might not need a calming draught but Severus might need a few drops in his tea.
--
Three days before Christmas-and having just celebrated Yule the day before- Severus catches Harry...knitting. With a spell. It was only a quick flash, as the boy had quickly hidden the thing. Along with a book and...a wand. “Harry.” A few days ago, the random Accio-ing of his things from his room had stopped. But now there was this.
Harry looks up at him from under his bangs.
“Where did you get a wand?” He asks, slowly.
“Um...I’m not supposed to tell you.” He says, looking very uncomfortable by it.
Irritation flares up and Severus’ eyebrow raises in sternness. With a flick of his wrist, the wand is in his hand instead. The young boy lets out a meep as the wand slips through his grasp, before looking anywhere but at Severus. “Harry.” a little amusement at the way the boy was acting, but only a little. “There is a reason that Magi are not given wands until they are about to come to Hogwarts, Harry. We teach you to use your magic safely and properly here. You have not had these classes.”
A bottom lip juts out at him. “But I can’t tell- I promised.”
“Then I shall have to confiscate the wand indefinitely.”
“What-but-but!” Harry stands up now, shock and dismay on his face. “I need it!”
“For what?”
Harry backs up a little and looks away. “Can’t say.” He says quickly. “But I do need it. And It’s not for anythin’ bad, I swear!”
Severus doesn’t lower his eyebrow. He cannot allow the boy to continue without supervision. Or knowing who would give a child a wand. Something could go extremely wrong- Hary could get hurt.
But instead of answering, Harry’s lips purse even more before he grabs the blanket he’d hid the knitting and the book in and dashes towards the door. Severus-not actually expecting that, blinks in surprise as his Ward runs. “Har-” The door closes behind him.
He huffs, but there’s a seedling of worry in his stomach. Had he pushed the boy to hard? He couldn’t continue treating Harry as if he were made of glass-as he very much was not. Not anymore. But it was difficult, at times, to know what would trigger him and what would not.
For now, he decides to give the dark-haired boy his space. At least he does not have the wand to get into mischief with. Severus sighs-noting that he does that a lot since Harry Potter turned up in his care- and sits on the sofa un-elegantly. He summons some tea-putting just a splash of bourbon to ease his nerves.
If Harry were not back by dinner, Severus would go look for him.
--
Harry did return by dinner-but went straight to his room. He did not even look at Severus and it made the man realize that he’d grown accustomed to the way the boy would smile at him upon seeing him in any given setting. It also made the unease in the pit of his stomach twist.
He knocks on the child’s door but receives little more answer than that Harry was tired. He wants to explain that he’s only looking out for the boy-but his mouth is as if it were glued shut. With yet another sigh-he summons a house elf and has her take food in to the boy. To make sure he at least ate a little.
--
Severus’ nerves were growing increasingly. It’s Christmas Eve-and still Harry had not spoken with him. Indeed-it was hard to even catch the boy in the same room as Severus. The past two days, the boy had been up before Severus was-a feat, as Severus was up early most mornings to check on overnight brews. Up and gone, before Severus even got his slippers on.
It was...down heartening to say the least. Whatever Harry had been working on with the wand, it seemed it was...very important to him. And Severus had made a mistake in not offering to allow him to work on it so long as Severus could supervise. At the very least. Or perhaps made him stay and explain-though he doubts that would make it any better. Perhaps make the boy hate him, which was the last thing he wanted. Instead, the winter break he’d hoped to spend with the green-eyed boy- turned into a winter break in which he'd barely seen the boy.
Severus made sure that the Hogwarts House Elves were checking in on Harry. Making sure he was fed, that he was safe. Giving Severus updates. Seeing as anytime Severus got close, the boy would up and run. The sight made his heart clench in his chest as harshly as it made his hands clench into the cloth upon his lap.
None of this spoke well of his chances of Harry wishing to be adopted by him in anyway, paperwork or blood adoption-and it made Severus all the more upset by the prospect of it. Of rejection. Of him doing something wrong to make it that way.
He attempts to knock on Harry’s door for dinner that night. Tries to get the boy to come out. He does not succeed. “Harry...I’m...” Severus hesitates. He isn’t used to apologies or explanations. The last apology he gave was to... He shuts his eyes and rests his forehead to the door. “I hope you know that what I did, I did because I want you to be safe, Harry. At all times. I’m sorry if I pushed too hard. But my top priority, is to your safety.”
The silence is loud. And yet strangely deafening too. Like a chasm. And then a voice speaks to break it. “I know.” It’s quiet, but Severus hears it. “I’m not mad, d-er.” Harry cuts off before changing whatever he was about to say. “I’m not mad I just need...a little more time.”
Now, it is Severus’ turn to turn quiet. “Will you not come out-so we may talk?” The silence tells him enough and he leans back, breathing in deeply. “Very well. If it’s time you need, I shall leave you to it.” He attempts to keep the usual clipped-ness from his tone that always turns up when he was either irritated-or in this case-hurt. He should understand-he does-that sometimes what someone needed was space. But it did not help the worry that he’d been feeling for days, nor the hurt.
With that, he did an about face and went to the kitchen. Slumps at the kitchen table and rests his head in his right hand. “Tatty.” He calls out. A female Elf appears. “Please be sure to make Harry a good Christmas dinner.” It was Harry’s first, after all. Severus would not allow him to miss out on at least the good food, for his first real Christmas Eve. “Include some treacle tart, they are his favorite.” He adds tiredly.
--
Going to bed that night had been difficult. He’d tossed and turned-but eventually he fell asleep. Or at least he assumes he did, as he now wakes up to a figure near his bed. He blinks rapidly-mind already registuring the small stature as Harry. “Harry?” He asks in a sleep rough voice, confused. Confused, but then it dawns on him that he’s finally seeing his charge after almost three days of not seeing him. He slowly sits up, noting the way that the boy is wringing his hands and slightly trembling. “Did you have another nightmare?" He asks gently.
At his words, the boy's hands still, but clench together harsher for it. “I...” He says, voice small. Almost as small as it had been in the beginning. “Can I...still...sleep with you?” He ends in a whisper.
Severus heart does the same thing it did when the boy had started this. Twists with warmth at the trust-at coming to Severus. But at the same time, pain that the boy still thought he needed to ask. That he had to be there at all, because of Nightmares. Those damn muggles were lucky he hadn’t a say in how they were dealt with.
He doesn’t answer, specifically. But he does raise the other end of his blanket. Watches as Harry’s green eyes widen before he dives for the spot. Wraps his arms around the Potions master and buries his face into Severus’ abdomen. Severus lets out a breath of relief to have the boy in his arms again and he re-arranges them so he could lay down once more. “It’s okay.” He says, soothingly running his fingers through the boy's hair.
“I had a dream that you hated me because I hid from you. That you didn’t want me around anymore because of the way I was acting.” Harry cries into his stomach.
How funny-in a non-laughing way-that the boy was worried about a much similar thing as he. “No, Harry. I will always want you- no matter how you act.”
“I’m sorry for hiding. And for not coming out and for not telling you things.” Harry continues, his grip tightening.
“It’s alright.” Severus says, surprised that he’s content to merely be able to hold Harry for a little while. To know that the boy still obviously cared and trusted Severus. “We can talk about it in the morning. After presents. Okay?”
A face is nodded into his pajamas. “Thank you. For still taking care of me.”
“Always.” Severus promises, and holds the boy closer, closing his eyes. He listens as the boys breathing evens out and eventually, he falls asleep to the very sound.
---
Dark, obsidian eyes blink open to the soft vibrating of his wand under his pillow. Being Christmas, he’d set the spell to go off an hour later than he usually would, and it was now eight A.M. He reaches under said pillow carefully, realizing that his company from the night previous was still resting partially on top of him. He brings out his wand and flicks it in the right ways to turn the vibration feature off.
Normally, Severus would get out of bed the instant his spell went off. But normally, the messy haired child wasn’t still in his bed in the mornings. Being woken up at five to six a.m. consistently for around eight years of one’s life will do that. But considering the late hour that it likely was when Harry came to him last night, it doesn’t surprise Severus that the child had for once, slept in.
He was pleased by the fact, however. He had been afraid that Harry’s poor sleeping habits and nightmares paired with this internal alarm, would make some nights go by with very little sleep for the child. He’s glad that, at least for this time, he was proven wrong.
He looks down, taken out of his thoughts, when he hears a soft chuffing noise. He sees the boy snuggling his face closer into Severus stomach-where his head had migrated over night from his chest. A soft smile takes over Severus’ face as he takes in the adorable sight-to which he would not admit to thinking. Ever. His reputation and all. At least, not out loud.
Instead of attempting to move out of the bed, Severus quietly calls his current reading material, and settled in for a wait. Not willing to risk that trying to get out of bed would wake up the child.
An hour passes like this, a DADA journal that had recently come out floating just above Severus as he read. His magic turning the page when required whilst one of his hands softly stroked the surprisingly (for how messy the boys hair always is) soft black hair, his other being trapped between his body and Harry’s. His left arm-the one trapped-was pins and needles by now-however he’d borne worse things and was only slightly tempted to try and remove his arm from where it was.
“Mmm.” A tired voice sighs, causing Severus to look down at his charge. Tired green eyes blink up at Severus slowly.
“So the Kelpie awakens.” Severus drawls, picking up his wand that had been resting on his chest and banishing his book.
“Kelpie?” The boy asks, sitting up and stretching.
“Quite. Turn your back and they cling to it and drag you down into the water to be eaten. Though I doubt you could achieve such a thing.” Severus says, now subtly shaking out his arm.
Harry’s face flushes a little as he glances down. “Sorry.”
Severus waves his hand dismissively. “I assure you, had I a true problem with it-I would not have allowed you to sleep.”
A small smile alights up on the child’s face and warms Severus’ heart. He’d missed the brats smile in the last three days. Hesitantly as always, Severus returns the smile with a small one of his own. It is in that exact moment htat the child seems to remember the day, as his eyes start to sparkle and his grin grows wider. “It’s Christmas!”
“It is.” Severus confirms.
Within two seconds, the child has hold of Severus and is attempting to drag him out of bed. “Come on-you have to open your presents!”
Humoring the ten year old, Severus allows himself to be taken out of bed and pulled into their tiny sitting room. They had set up the Christmas tree-at Harry’s behest-at the very start of December. Now, it sat near the fire, glowing fairy lights- lights shaped like real fairy’s- bobbed and danced around the evergreen’s branches in a soft glow. Below the trees lowest branches, sat a mountain of presents.
At the overflowing presents, Harry seems to stop. “That’s...a lot.” He mumbles, looking over at Severus. “You have a lot of friends, huh?”
Baffled, Severus can’t help but to chuckle a small bit. “No, Harry. I think that you’ll find that most of these ghastly wrapped presents are for you.” With a flick of his wand, he separates the piles. Indeed, only five of the presents were for Severus. One more present than Severus had been expecting. However, he could gander a guess as to who the gift was from, based on the way it was covered in golden ‘W&W’ labels. The twins-which makes him all the more hesitant to open it. But later.
“That pile is yours.” He says, turning back to about thirty or so presents. Harry’s eyes are wide and his jaw opens in surprise.
Once more, it causes something to twist in Severus’ heart that the boy was not expecting presents at all. While it was an obscene amount of presents, it did not surprise Severus. For one, some of the presents were for Harry Potter-all checked and triple checked for malicious or nefarious spells, curses, and potions. The other’s were for Harry as the boy everyone only knew as Severus’ ward. No last name had been given to the other students. Perhaps the Weasley twins, Severus was never sure what exactly those two knew or did not know.
Reaching up, Severus shuffles the boys hair. “Which would you prefer to open first, Harry?” He asks.
The short boy turns his head up and looks at Severus. “Yours, of course!” He says. “But first-you have to open my present!”
“Your Present?”
“Well, not my present, but the present I made for you!” Harry says, rushing over to the pile of presents that were Severus’s. His small hands grabbed up a silver gift box and came back to Severus. “Sit, sit!” He says, once the gift has exchanged hands.
“You seem abnormally excited to be giving a gift instead of receiving one.” Most children preferred to at least open their own presents and then be excited over gift giving.
“That’s because you’re always taking care of me and you’ve given me loads of things, and now it’s my turn to give you something!” Harry says with a grin. Severus smiles a little at that, and sits down. “Open it.” The impatient child says, even as Severus was already unwrapping it. Severus gives the child a look, pausing in his unwrapping. “Sorry.” Harry says, sheepishly.
Nodding, Severus turns back to unwrapping and then opening the box. He blinks several times as he sees a scarf resting at the bottom of the box. The color of the scarf is a deep almost black, green. Quietly, he reaches into the box and picks up the scarf. It’s soft and warm to the touch and he can feel some sort of magic to it, as well.
“It has a few charms on it, so that it can do some neat things.” Harry starts to talk, Severus turning his eyes to look at the boy. “Like-it can’t get dirty ever, even from things like potions fumes! I also charmed it to faintly smell of pine because that’s your favorite scent. It’ll keep you warm in the winter or cool in the summer. It’s also semi-sentient and it’ll pull a bit at your hair when in the area of Blue or red vervain. Cause their normally hard to find, but really popular in potions. It’ll point you towards them! I had to have help from Professor Flitwick on that last one, though. So technically it’s a present from him too.” Harry babbles excitedly and nervously.
Severus remembers the knitting from a few days. “You...made this?” He asks, turning his gaze back to the scarf. It certainly did not look professionally done. In fact the knitting was sort of terrible. But somehow, he feels it’s the best present he’d ever received. Besides, the spells and charms were there, so it’d still function warmly.
“Er, yeah. I mean, I had no idea at first what to get you. Like-what do you like, besides potions? So, Fred, George, and I all started to look into ways to tell. And they heard a fifth year practicing the ‘Accio’ spell and we devised a plan. I just practiced wandlessly calling something of mine to me. And when I got that down, I started Accioing your favorite things. Favorite color, favorite books, favorite clothes...you know, to get a feel for it. It took forever, but then I figured something soft, Dark green and useful would be the best bet. So, I Owled Auntie Cissa and she told me a list of charms that I could practice and try and do for useful as well as the warming charm.”
Severus is honestly touched at the amount of effort and time that Harry had put into this. And the amount of thought. It warms him up inside to know that Harry cared about getting the perfect gift for Severus. At the same time, his exasperation levels rise, because why couldn’t the child go and ask someone he knows? Or himself? Like a normal Wizard?
This all comes out in amusement as his small smile turns into a smirk. “So that is why I have been continuously almost bludgeoned by my own things.” He states, remember all the things in his room that moved-or that came flying at him. Even his chair had been moved by a few inches. Which he just imagines Harry sitting on when he’d Accio’d it and being startled when it moved-as Harry loved sitting in that same seat as much as Severus did.
“...Yes?” He states more question like than answering. His typical sheepish grin takes over his face.
Something dawns on Severus, however, when he thinks closer. “I assume that the wand was for the charms, then?” He asks.
“Yes.” More confident there.
Severus nods. “I understand you wished for this to be a surprise, Harry. However, in the future-please have an adult supervise you. Understand?” At Harry’s nod, he continues. “How did you finish?”
“Er...well, I got another wand, sir.”
“You-” He sighs.
“But I mostly was supervised by Flitwick while doing the charms- just the knitting is what I did on my own.” Harry continues quickly. “And I used Flitwick's wand while with him.”
“Who is supplying a ten-year-old with wands, Harry?”
But the boy’s lips remain closed, though his eyes look wary.
“Fine. But I expect you to return the wands. Immediately.”
Harry nods Vigorously in response. “Okay.”
“Now.” Severus says, waving his wand at the ridiculous pile of presents on the ground. Three pick up and float over to the boy, who is now seated on the ground near Severus’ chair. “All of these are from me. However, I should like you to open this one first.” He says, thanking his Occlumency training for not allowing the tremor of unease to leak into his voice. Fear of rejection and all.
The thinnest present-one he knows is just paperwork that needs to be signed-floats to Harry first. The rest he sets down nearby. Harry plucks the present out of the air and proceeds to slowly and meticulously open it-sure not to tear the wrapping. Severus watches on with an outward appearance of ease-but inside his nerves were fried. Harry’s face contorts into confusion as he slowly starts to read the document. The further into the document he got, the more his face slowly turned from confusion to slack jaw and surprise.
“Is this...” Harry looks up at Severus.
“Formal Adoption paperwork, as well as blood adoption paperwork?” Severus asks, before nodding. “Indeed.”
There’s two seconds in which the boy doesn’t react that feels like an eternity for Severus. But then Harry is on his feet and charging towards Severus in happiness-a huge grin stretched across his head. Severus barely has time to contemplate that Harry means to give him a hug-as Harry had never been one to initiate hugs, the closest he got was when he asked to share Severus’ bed when he had nightmares-before he was engulfed.
“Oh.” Escapes his lips, as his hands hesitantly come up around the small child.
“Can I call you dad?” Harry asks and wow, does that send something soaring in Severus chest. Now, he brings the child closer in the hug on his part. Smiling into raven locks of hair.
“That is typically what these adoption situations incur.” He snarks.
Harry laughs and Severus feels like the whole world is settled peacefully-or at least his own world is settled into content happiness.
--
Later-after much unwrapping of presents for Harry, Severus finally gets to his presents. Socks’ from Dumbledore, a new Crystal phial set from McGonagall. Surprisingly, the only thing the Weasley twins had gotten him was a Chocolate Frog, which upon opening and eating, Severus saw that Dumbledore’s picture had been spelled to have regular-colored robes (And looked very displeased with the outcome), instead of his usual garishly outlandish robes.
Alongside the rare Dark Arts book from the Malfoy’s-spelled to ward children from seeing as well as wanting to touch-came a letter from Narcissa.
Dear Severus,
By now, I imagine that Harry has had you open his present to you-so I despair not a moment of worry in spoiling it. I do hope you love your new scarf, handmade and all! As for your earlier letters of suspicion and worry as to why Harry had been spelling things from your room, I think it is obvious that he was looking to get a sense of what you like. You now agree that it is adorable, yes?
I hope your Holidays are going well. Draco wishes Harry and yourself to visit soon. He’s missed having actual competition while playing Quidditch. The Nott heir would rather read books and Crabb and Goyle make okay beaters, but not very good at any other position. Or so I’m told. Harry however can apparently play all but the Beater position well. Though he’s sure to say that he doesn’t want to play the game too much. I’m sure from a sense of not wanting to be bested too often.
-Narcissa Malfoy
P.S. Do return the wands-they are expensive enough getting extra ones.