Eyeballs and Shampoo
Chapter 26: Eyeballs and Shampoo
November 17, 1993
Remus woke up that morning to see Tonks crouched over him, dabbing at his bare chest with something, a clearly anguished look on her face.
"Tonks?" he whispered. She gave a little shriek and dropped the cloth onto his chest.
"Sorry!" she said. "I didn't know you were awake! How are you feeling?"
"Fine," he managed, realizing that he was not wearing anything, though thankfully, a blanket was covering him from the waist down. "What… I mean…"
"Shh," she coaxed. "It's okay. It's a good thing you had Wolfsbane last night. Did it help?"
"Yeah," he replied. "It allows me to keep my human mind while I transform."
"But you still transform," she said, a frown on her face. "And that's still painful. The good thing is that I've gotten the blood to stop flowing from most of your scars. You didn't break anything last night, thank goodness, but you won't be able to do classes today. Well, technically, you can, but I don't want you to overexert yourself. Okay, now this is going to sting, so just hold on to me." She offered him her hand, which he took gratefully. "All right."
As she cleaned his wound with an antiseptic, he squeezed her hand tightly at each little stinging burst of pain.
"Almost over," she whispered. "Let's just get it out of the way, yeah?"
"Thank you," he croaked.
"Don't mention it."
Once she had finally cleaned it, and he had let go of her hand, she smiled and placed a kiss on his forehead. "You're so brave."
Something in him sensed that she was being honest, that she truly meant it, and he could not have been more grateful for anything.
"Don't you have to go to training today?" he asked, vaguely aware that it was a Monday.
"Yeah, that's why I got here early," she explained. "Once you're feeling better, I can head to the Ministry. But if you're not feeling well, and you really want me here, I can just tell Mad-Eye that I have a prior commitment and…"
"No, Tonks," he said, gently but firmly, "I don't want you to skip training because of me. I've been doing this for years now."
"I know, but that's just in case. You know, if you're going to die." She gave a sad smile.
"It's okay, Tonks." He took her hand again and squeezed it. "Don't worry about all that. Er, how'd I get here?"
"Oh," she said sheepishly. "Well, I found you on the floor this morning, and I levitated you to your bed. Don't worry, I… er, averted my gaze."
"Thanks," he muttered, feeling his face go warm. "That's fine."
"Anyway," she began in an attempt to stray their conversation elsewhere, "did you hear that James and Lily made up?"
"You would think they're still teenagers," he murmured, smiling. "They've been acting so…"
"Sappy?" Tonks offered. "Yeah. But it's okay, it's kind of cute. Sappy is nice."
"Are you suggesting?" he asked, smirking.
"What? No," she said quickly. "I was just making an offhand remark."
"My sweet darling Nymphadora," he teased. "You look so adorable, and so sweet, and so cute, Nymphadora."
Her gaze was serious for a moment, and then she collapsed into uncontrollable laughter. "I take it back, sappy is awful. And don't call me Nymphadora."
He kissed her hand, smiling. "Whatever you say. Thanks, by the way."
"What, for helping you? No need to thank me. It's the least I could do."
He ran his hand along her thigh. "You're incredible."
She smiled and brushed back his hair. "Thank you. By the way, do you mind if I use your shower?"
"Yeah, go ahead. Feel free to use anything."
"Thanks, Remus." She slid off his bed and made her way into his bathroom.
For several minutes, he listened to the running of the shower, and the steam sneaking through the hinges of the door, and he smiled, thinking of his beautiful girlfriend, and how lucky he was to have her.
A few more minutes passed, and she emerged from the bathroom, a towel wrapped around her midsection, showing off a tantalising amount of skin. Her hair was wet and drooping to the side, and Remus absolutely wanted to feel her skin against his at this very moment.
She walked towards him. "Hey. How are you feeling?"
Without hesitation, he pulled her against him so that her chest was plumb against his. He could feel every one of her womanly curves against him, and the swell of her breast as she breathed, and her heart pounding.
"Not that I mind," she whispered, "but aren't you still recovering?"
"Who cares?" he whispered.
She smiled and rested her head on his shoulder, as he stroked her back gently, careful not to unwrap the towel.
After a few minutes, she sat up, frowning. "I'm really really sorry, but I have to go to training, and..."
"Not a problem," he managed. "I'll keep my eyes closed."
She smirked. "Thanks."
He shielded his gaze as she got dressed, the moisture hanging in the air from the shower. She pulled on her robes and tied her hair into a ponytail and turned back to him. "Will you be okay while I'm out?"
"Yeah, I'll be fine," he assured her.
She smiled. "Okay, then. Feel better, Remus. Bye."
"I love you."
Tonks, who had just turned around and started heading towards the door, stopped in her tracks, turning around with a wide smile on her face. "What did you say? Say it again."
"I love you," he repeated quietly. "I love you so much I can't describe it. You have no idea what you do to me, how grateful I am to you for everything, how much I look forward to doing anything with you. I love you, Tonks."
There were tears in her eyes. "R-Really?"
"Absolutely."
"Well, then, I guess this is the time to tell you that I love you too?" she asked, beaming.
He pulled her in for a hug, not caring that there was a dull ache in his ribs, or a new set of scars on his chest. He breathed in her scent and held her tightly, as she did to him.
Because they completed each other.
And that was all they needed.
Hermione gripped the can of applesauce tightly under her desk. She couldn't believe she was about to do this.
"Now, try this wand movement," Flitwick was saying. "Flick it, don't jab it! No, Mr. Finnigan, don't jab it! It's all in the wrist, not the fingers. There you go."
Slowly, Hermione raised her hand.
"Yes, Miss Granger? You have a question?"
Hermione stepped out of her chair, her fingers trembling, as she walked forward and dumped the entire can of applesauce on his hair with a splat. "No."
The class erupted in screams and shrieks of laughter as she walked back to her desk with the empty can of applesauce, watching Flitwick's shocked reaction as he fingered his hair and picked off clumps of applesauce. "Miss Granger, what is this stuff?"
"It's applesauce, Professor," Seamus managed, as the class roared with laughter.
"Applesauce?" asked Flitwick incredulously. "What's applesauce? And why is it so sticky? Get out of my hair! Out, out!"
He siphoned the majority of the applesauce off of his head with his wand, a glob of applesauce landing on the ground.
Ron turned to Hermione. "What's gotten into you?"
She smirked proudly. "I think you'll find that The Notorious Watermelons now have a point."
It was a Dazzling Divas meeting.
"Hey, Selena," greeted Candice, one of the other first-years on her team.
"Hi, Candice," said Selena. "Have we decided which prank we're going to do?"
"I dunno," Kylie said, shrugging. "Maybe we could do the applesauce one?"
"Someone already did that," pointed out Katie Bell. "See? It's crossed out on the list and the Watermelons have a point."
She pointed to the standings, where there was one pink dot under the Watermelons' name.
"Darn," muttered Kylie. "I wanted to do that."
"Can we do the one where we all wear pink?" asked Ella.
"Yeah," said the other Ella. "We're all girls, anyway."
Seamus coughed pointedly.
"Too bad, Finnigan," Pansy Parkinson said, smirking. "It's an entire team thing."
"So can't we do another one?" complained Seamus. "I don't want to wear bright pink!"
"I like the pink one," whined a girl named Marie. "Please?"
"Come on, Seamus," said Marietta. "Don't be such a wimp. We have to win this!"
"Fine," grumbled Seamus. "But not extravagant pink, okay? Just like, salmon-colored. Not horrific bright pink."
"What on earth?!" shrieked Pomona Sprout.
Throughout the entire day, there had been students in her classes sporting these ridiculously bright pink getups from head to toe. They had smeared their faces with fluorescent pink paint, and their hair had been doused with the pink paint too too. Sprout had a sneaking suspicion that they had Transfigured their robes pink, because they were sporting horrendously bright pink robes and pink shoes too. And nobody else gave them weird looks, like nothing was wrong. What was going on?!
"What's going on, Mr. Finnigan?" Sprout asked Seamus Finnigan, as the rest of the class sniggered into their knuckles. "Explain this!"
"Is there something wrong with wearing pink?" asked Seamus defensively, crossing his arms over his chest. "No! I don't think there is!"
"I never said there was anything wrong with the color, but why are you dressed like this?" Sprout asked, horrified.
Just then, the entire greenhouse next to them blew up with a deafening crash.
"I didn't do it!" shouted Ernie Macmillan.
"Oh my god!" moaned Liana, covering her face with her hands.
Harry sighed. "What now?"
They were in the library, and so were a bunch of Liana's other friends. There were four Slytherin girls sitting in two distinct groups of two at the far table.
"Mum and Dad are being obnoxious," groaned Liama. "Have you seen them at all today?"
"I only saw Dad drop by at lunch," Harry admitted. "But I believe you. What are they doing now?"
"Well, as if the snogging wasn't enough, which is gross, by the way, now they're calling each other the most atrocious pet names!"
"No," moaned Harry. "This is terrible. Why are they torturing us like this?"
"I wish they'd at least keep it to when we aren't in the room," Liana complained. "It's so annoying otherwise."
"You weren't there that other day," Harry said. "They were on the couch and being all sappy and gross and I had to go up to the hospital wing to treat my migraine."
Liana snorted. "Seriously? Well, honestly, I don't blame you. They're like that all the time, but like… it's so weird to see your parents doing stuff like this."
"I…" Harry began, but he was cut across by Kylie, who came running over.
"Hi, Liana," said Kylie excitedly. "Guess what? Our team for the prank war has a point!"
"So does ours," Liana pointed out. "And so do the Watermelons. Harry, your team is the only one that hasn't gotten a point yet."
Harry sighed. "We'll get some points on the board soon, don't worry."
"Anyway, what's up, Liana?" asked Kylie.
"Well, nothing, other than the fact that my parents are being absolutely sappy," grumbled Liana. "Now they're calling each other disgusting things like 'baby' and stuff."
Harry choked. "What?!"
"Seriously. I heard Mum calling Dad that just now. Like, they always had names for each other before, but not this bad."
"Well, at least you know your parents love each other," Kylie said with a shrug.
Harry saw one of the Slytherin girls at the table get up and march out of the room.
"What's her problem?" asked Harry.
Liana turned around. "Oh, that's that Allesia girl. She's really rude. Don't mind her."
"Anyway, I have double Potions with the Slytherins now," Harry grumbled, rolling his eyes. "Bye."
Liana smirked. "Say hi to Draco for me."
"Hey, Tonks. Finished with training?"
Tonks turned to see James in the hall. "Hi, James. Yeah, just finished for the day. What's up?"
"Nothing much," James replied. "What about you?"
She shrugged. "Yeah, same here. How's everything at Hogwarts?"
James frowned. "I didn't even check in, and I feel so bad! I had a night shift last night, which meant I couldn't…" He lowered his voice to a whisper. "Couldn't transform with Remus, and it was full moon last night! I went and saw him at lunch, but still, that's not enough. He looked pretty good today, though, compared to normal. He did a good job of healing today."
A smirk appeared on her face, but then it was gone. "I hope he feels better. He goes through a lot."
James nodded sadly. "Yep."
"Right, then," she said. "I'll see you tomorrow."
"Bye, Tonks," he said, and as she walked past him, her hair brushed against his face. He took a deep breath and frowned.
"Wait."
She stopped and turned to look at him. "Hmm?"
He reached for a lock of her hair and sniffed it again.
"What? James, what are you doing?"
"This…" he realized slowly, "is Remus's shampoo."
She regarded him with a weary expression.
"This is Remus's shampoo, I'm sure of it! What are you…" He stopped dead. "You and Remus in the shower… together…"
"What the heck, James!" she cried. "No! Why do you jump to such conclusions?"
"But Moony's already dating someone..." he continued, paying her no attention. "Unless… you're the one who he's dating?"
There was a smug little smirk on her face.
"You are?" he yelped. "Seriously? It's you?!"
"Why are you so surprised?" she asked, looking a little hurt. "Is it that far-fetched?"
"You're dating Remus!" he exclaimed, jumping up and wrapping her in a hug. "That's the best news I've gotten all week!"
She looked a little surprised, but she laughed. "Thanks, I guess. Please don't take the mickey out of Remus for this, he's going to be so upset if you know."
"No guarantees," James said, thinking happily about all the ways he could torture Remus with this newfound information.
Ajit was the youngest kid on the Popping Apples, but he was about to perform arguably the scariest task.
He took the frog eyeball that he had stolen from the Potions cupboard and, with a deep breath, slipped it into Snape's shoe.
He was going to die for this.
Ajit watched as Snape's eyes widened, his face skirting down to stare at his shoe. He murmured a spell, and the frog eyeball flew into his shoe. A furious look formed on his face.
"Who did this?" he snapped.
"Did what?" the class chorused.
"Whoever did it, you know exactly what you did," he growled. He was right. Ajit did know what he had done. "I want you to admit it right now, or else this is going to go to the headmaster."
No one said anything, and Snape snarled. "You're making me do this."
His eyes bore into everyone's in the classroom, one-by-one, until they reached Ajit. He crossed his arms over his chest. "Sippy. Can you explain?"
"Explain wh-" Ajit stopped in mid-sentence as a burp ripped out of his throat. The class sniggered. "Explain what, sir?" he asked, ignoring the blush that was rising on his cheeks.
"The eyeball in my shoe!" spat Snape. Another chorus of sniggers rippled around the classroom. "It's not funny," he added in a deathly calm manner. The class shut up. It wasn't a humorous environment anymore.
"I don't know what you're talking about," Ajit said casually, wondering how on earth Snape possibly knew this.
"Oh, so you're lying as well?" Snape's eyes flashed. "We'll see how much of these guts you have remaining after your detention tomorrow."
Ajit gulped.