The Marauders rarely had a routine. Their livelihood was entirely dependent on being spontaneous and going with the flow. James would suddenly declare that it was high time they pranked someone from the Slytherins and Sirius would come up with some half ass idea of how to go about it and Remus would be the one to finally, reluctantly contribute to it intellectually and make it a thousand times more interesting. Peter, well, he blindly followed everything the others said whatsoever. The other two boys would just be spellbound by Remus's uncanny ability to come up with something absolutely brilliant, so naturally. This used to be the case always, since they were in their first year.
But things took a turn in the 7th year when they returned to Hogwarts.
James, bloody brilliant James, became the Head Boy (Seriously, wtf?)
The marauders always suspected that their headmaster was secretly insane and this year, they were a hundred percent sure that he'd lost his last shred of sanity.
___
Sirius was leaning on Remus's shoulder while the latter read his favourite book and Peter was sitting on the opposite side of their berth when James walked into the compartment. He heaved his chest proudly and looked at all his friends with a smug face. But, nobody seemed to even notice his presence.
'Ahem'
'AHEM!'
This made them all look up.
'Notice something different today?'
Sirius pointedly looked at him up and down and decided to completely ignore him. He was too tired today.
'Yeah Prongs, your hair is sticking out from six different angles today instead of the usual five. New hair gel? Seems to be working', Remus said without looking up from the book.
Sirius chuckled lightly and James kicked him in the shin.
'Oi! I wasn't the one that said it! Bloody prick.'
'You lot are being arrogant little shits today. I'd be careful if I were you, though. Wouldn't wanna be messing with the head boy on the very first day, ya know?'
With this, he pointed at the badge on his chest which indeed showed in bold red and gold coloured letters:
JAMES FLEAMONT POTTER
HEAD BOY
The compartment fell dead silent.
Sirius broke the silence first. 'You're what?! Head boy?! How's that even possible? Has Dumbledore lost his sense completely? I mean, I was sure of that happening someday but not so soon! What, he's only 120 years old, right? Merlin, life is cruel! ' He exclaimed dramatically, sighing with his hands over his chest.
With this, he earned another kick in the shin and this ended in the only inevitable way it would usually between James and Sirius - a wrestling war.
Peter kept himself busy munching on the chocolate frogs and Remus, well, he too was busy actively ignoring them throughout their ride to Hogwarts.
___
The common room was silent but for a few first year students looking around their magical school infrastructure for the first time in awe. Remus was spread on the couch by the fireplace, revising his last year's potions notes (Typical Remus behaviour, nothing unusual) and preparing for the advanced lessons that were commencing in a few days.
Peter had kept himself awfully busy all day long, chasing around Mary McDonald, keen on trying to get into her knickers at least by the end of the term.
And ever since James had found out that his eternal love Lily Evans was the Head girl, and decided to follow her around like a lost puppy hoping to get into her good books, Sirius had felt a little left out.
Of course he still had Remus, the one boy he has had a crush *the size of the giant squid by the lake* on, since the third year.
It had been really difficult for him ever since, to be around his best friend without his thoughts wandering over to the prohibited areas like how he wanted to snog the living daylights out of him.
Remus was different, different from James or Peter or any other person in Sirius's life in so many ways.
For starters, he didn't wanna snog the living daylights out of James (Eww).
But truth be told, he had always felt inclined towards the mysterious, sarcastic, bookish werewolf since their first year. He'd always noticed the other boy carefully, of how patient and kind he was from within, since the day he first arrived.
When they had first figured out about his condition in the third year, Sirius had wondered how this boy, who was just so beautiful and sweet and kind and all the bright things in the world put together, could be put in such unbearable pain each and every month and he had decided to become an animagus to wipe away his pain and suffering forever, right away.
And when Sirius Black decided on doing something, he did it no matter what, and that's how he - along with his two other friends, of course - had illegally transformed into his spirit animal, a giant black dog (No surprise there, what with his constant licking even in human form), and together they all had surprised Remus.
That's how they had become Messrs Moony, Wormtail, Padfoot and Prongs.
All that was okay.
But he knew he was screwed when one day in the third year, after the full moon, he had woken up beside a battered and torn Remus and had kissed him on the forehead absentmindedly.
And that was okay too.
But then he had stroked his hair, thinking that the boy was probably asleep, too tired from the transformation, and had leaned over him and ....
"No no no Black! What the hell are you doing?!"
His mental voice woke him up and hit him square in the head and he pulled back with a jolt immediately.
That's it!
There was no hope now.
Sirius Orion Black, the eldest heir to the Noble and most ancient house of Black, the son of Orion and Walburga Black, pure-blood all the way - had a gigantic crush on his male best friend, who also happened to be a half-blood werewolf. Charming!
__
After roaming around Hogwarts with nothing much to do, Sirius finally retreated back to the common room and flopped himself down beside Remus on the couch.
'Wotcher Moony?'
Remus didn't even look up at him from where he was scribbling over his old notes and Sirius prodded him lightly on his thigh with his toe. When he didn't receive any reaction, he kept doing it again and again until Remus finally sighed and decided to acknowledge his presence.
'Pads, I'm really busy here so you can go annoy someone else for a change.'
Sirius normally would've come up with the perfect comeback, but he really was a bit sad and lonely and therefore, deflated immediately before getting up from the couch and calling it a night. Remus felt a bit guilty for making Sirius sad and immediately put his book down and hurriedly caught his hand.
'Okay, what's up? Why are you being a sulky little shit today?'
'I'm bored. Thoroughly, utterly bored and James is out there gallivanting with his red headed goddess' - he airquoted the goddess part - 'and Peter isn't anywhere around and I thought I could use some company for a while.' He muttered.
'O-kayyy.. what do you wanna do?' Remus asked expectantly.
'I... I don't know. This is bad. At least you were studying until I came in and actively disturbed you. I'm gonna go try to sleep, Moony.'
'No no! I, I wasn't that busy anyway. Umm… I… I do have something in my mind that we can do...' Remus trailed off a bit and Sirius couldn't really catch his expression. He waited for Remus to continue.
'I mean, I don't know if it's a good idea though, I'm sure you'll laugh at my face and I'm too embarrassed to even ask you because I've been wanting to ask you this since the third year and I just didn't happen to know how. Now that I think about it, it is a bit ridiculous, ya know, and I don't know if I should ask you and -'
'Woah Moony, breathe... Breathe, slowly... Are you okay? Why are you rambling?'
Remus continued again, 'I don't know, I mean, I do know why, but I just can't figure out why I don't know how to ask you this because it really, really is quite ridiculous and -'
'Bloody hell Moony! What is it that you wanna ask me? You know I'd do anything for you!'
'I, I, I just wanted to ask you if you'd be willing to teach me how to fly, on the broom. Like maybe on your broom?' Remus closed his eyes, scrunching his eyebrows and anticipated the usual bark of laughter from Sirius.
Instead,
'Merlin! Is this what you were hesitating to ask me all this while? All these years? Like, since the third year?! Are you insane?! I mean, I'd absolutely love to teach you how to fly, Moonkins!'
The traces of boredom and sadness in his face just disappeared completely and instead broke out into a huge grin that meant all the troubles in the World usually, and Remus wondered for a minute, if he'd made a mistake.
But it was too late already.
___
And that's how they ended up on top of the astronomy tower around 8 pm, standing by the ledge, with Sirius already well settled on his broom, holding it in place with his right hand, the other hand reaching out for Remus to grab. Remus kept fidgeting around and looked at the broom and back at Sirius again and again but Sirius just gave him one last look of reassurance and he let out a heave of sigh, took his hand, hopped on and settled comfortably behind Sirius.
___
'This is bloody brilliant! I mean, we could have done this long back, Moony, and by this time, you could have been an expert *flyer* or whatever, chasing me around on the broom, trying to beat me at my own game, you know?'
'Well, I did wanna become the first flying werewolf to ever exist, so you're doing a great service to the wizarding world by helping me make my dream come true.'
'Oh hush Moons! This is great! I'll show you all the spells and movements one by one. You're gonna love it!'
After flying around every nook and corner of Hogwarts, they returned back to the tower by 9.15 pm. Sirius, instead of getting down from the broom, just settled comfortably on it, facing their large campus grounds from above, every inch now illuminated by the night lights.
He signalled for Remus to put both his legs on the same side and settle on with his back facing the Hogwarts walls just like him, but Remus just gave him a pointed look and decided not to move an inch.
'Pads, maybe we should get down. It's getting much darker and we should get off the broom before either of us accidentally fall all the way down and break our bones into pieces.'
They were on the broom parallel to the top of the astronomy tower, just before the ledge, and at least a couple hundred feet above the ground level.
Sirius just chuckled lightly and his hands wandered all around the pockets in his robes before finding the one roll of joint he'd stashed away long back. He lit it graciously, took a drag and slowly relaxed. Remus knew there was no point in trying to convince him anymore and snatched the roll away from his hand and took his own drag.
They both settled in comfortable silence, glancing at the night sky, the moon and the stars. This was one of the places they often came sneaking back to when neither of them could sleep at night.
'Why'd you wanna fly, Moony? I mean, why suddenly in the third year? I remember pestering you in the first year, desperately trying to get you into the team, ya know?'
Remus just took another drag and carefully put both his legs on one side like Sirius had previously suggested and glanced up at the sky.
'I don't know exactly. I never was a fan of quidditch but there was just something about the way people flew around in the air. It felt so, so soothing and I just wanted to feel it too.'
'Also, I'm dead scared of heights and I wanted to overcome that fear someday.' Remus said it too quickly as he closed his one eye, scrunched his nose and looked sideways at Sirius, slightly embarrassed.
'My my Moony, Remus John Lupin admitting that he's scared of something! The world must be ending simultaneously in another corner at this very minute.' Sirius chuckled.
'I'm scared of a lot of things, Pads. Just like everyone else.'
'Uh-huh' Sirius absently murmured and looked at him, and for a second, he saw something change in Remus's expression and within milliseconds, whatever it was, was gone. He stared at him, kept staring at him curiously and leaned forward and felt Remus' breath hitch for a second.
'What? What's wrong, Pads? Is there something on my face?' Remus asked, trying to wipe his face with the other hand.
Sirius reached out and held his hand, took a heavy drag from the joint roll before taking it out and flipping it away for good and said, 'I'm so sorry, Moony.'
'Uh? For what? Pads, what's wrong?'
'For this.'
His face turned into a full grown grin as he pulled Remus from where he was sitting beside him in one go and with a flash, jumped forward from the broom, just like that!
'Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhh'
Remus was sure he was gonna crack his bones and die within seconds before his bum landed on something hard like a stick that hurt a little but held him in place, just about 6 feet above the ground level. He slowly opened his eyes and traced his own hand that was holding on tight to his bastard of a friend's traitorous hand and then slowly lifted his gaze up to meet Sirius'. Sirius had the audacity to grin at him like an idiot, clapping him on the back and wheezing with laughter.
'Merlin, your face! Priceless! Like I was gonna let us die so young, Moony! I was right there with you and you still screamed like a fucking baby Mandrake!'
Remus still had his hand on Sirius' and as he watched his best friend laugh uncontrollably, he could do nothing but laugh along with him. Tears welled from his eyes from laughing so hard and they ended up play-fighting and punching each other for a while, before it started unceremoniously snowing in August.
'We should probably head back to the dorm. It's way past bedtime already.'
'I don't wanna go in just yet.' Remus said softly.
Sirius looked back at him. Remus's face had that unreadable expression on again and Sirius fought desperately with his inner self to just reach out, touch him and comfort him gently.
'What's wrong Moons?' he asked slowly.
Remus didn't say anything. He was glancing down at his feet and this was suddenly becoming too much for Sirius altogether. He kept thinking of ways to avoid having any heartfelt conversations with the boy beside him due to the absolute fear and the dreadful certainty of him confessing his overflowing feelings to Remus without any warning.
However, Remus looked back at him with such soft eyes, his expression still unreadable but with an undertone of shyness and Sirius, after fighting off the protests of his inner self, reached out and touched his face gently. Remus leaned on to his touch and closed his eyes and Sirius couldn't breathe anymore. This really was becoming too much for him.
'Hey, what's wrong?' Sirius almost whispered.
'Nothing. I, I did wanna ask you about one more thing though. Been wanting to... since third year.'
'Yeah?' Sirius gulped nervously and bit his lower lip, anticipating the inevitable flood of embarrassment waiting to wash him over.
'You remember the day after the full moon in the shack? This was after the Harvest moon and we had a really tiresome run the previous night and I woke up the next day with god knows how many new scars and bruises. You were beside me in the morning. Prongs and Wormtail had retreated back to the dorm because they had their OWLs.'
Sirius remained silent. How could he ever forget that day, that moment? How could he ever forget the very second he realized that he was gone for the boy next to him. He looked down beyond his own feet and wondered if he jumped all the way down the remaining 6 ft, would the ground be kind enough to swallow him whole?
It's worth a try though, he thought.
'Pads, I was awake. I was awake when you leaned over me and then pulled back abruptly. I saw you pace back and forth the shack and flop down on the chair in the corner. You looked like you regretted it immediately and - '
'I'm sorry. I'm so sorry, Moony. I wasn't thinking. I don't know what came over me that day at the shack, but I swear I wasn't even actively thinking. My mind just sort of, I don't know, maybe short circuited for a second there and I immediately pulled back because I didn't wanna lose you, lose our friendship. You are way more important to me than anything else in the World, more than my own bloody feelings and I realized it then and there. Can we just forget this whole thing, please?'
Remus remained silent.
'Moony?'
'Moons!'
'I don't wanna forget it though, Pads…' Remus spoke so quietly that Sirius almost missed it.
'That day in the shack, I just desperately wanted to try and stop you from pulling back. I wanted to just hold you close, pull you in and finish what you almost started because... Because that's exactly what I've always wanted too. All this time, Pads.... And I don't know if you've changed your mind though. Hell, I hadn't even considered the possibility of it until now, this very second, that probably you would have had second thoughts about -'
Remus didn't get to finish that sentence because Sirius was not gonna let him believe for one second that he ever had second thoughts about this.
He leaned forward and caught his lips in a swift motion and placed his hands carefully around Remus's neck. Remus in turn, reached out and fisted Sirius's hair, tugging it behind his ear with one hand and held his face steadily with the other hand, tilting his face up to angle their kiss. This led Sirius to involuntarily let a moan escape his lips and Remus mentally decided to store this beautiful sound away in his mind forever. He would remember it till the very end because HE did that to Sirius Black.
Sirius pulled back and gasped for breath before lunging forward and taking Remus's lips on his again and this time, he let his tongue passionately slip inside his mouth. The response from Remus made him chuckle mentally and his brain did a little back flip before landing perfectly on the ground and doing a victory dance.
He moved his body forward, inching closer and closer towards Remus and settled almost entirely on his lap without breaking the kiss. Remus greedily pulled him further in, closer and closer, wrapping his arms around him, and held him tight from the waist, slowly grabbing Sirius' legs and putting them each on either of his side, wrapping them both around his own waist. This passionate snogging session that involved a lot of tongues and lips and hands caressing and fumbling with whatever they could find in between, lasted for a very long time until it started snowing very heavily. They both pulled back from one another when the snow fell down upon them rather harshly and rested their foreheads against each other's.
'The broom isn't very comfortable, ya know? How about we head back in and continue this in our dorm?' Sirius offered rather breathlessly.
Remus wiped away bits of snow from his smiling boyfriend's face and pulled him in for one last kiss before they both headed back to their dorm.
___
'I'm telling you, her heart's melting away slowly for me and by this time next year at least, I'll be in a relationship with the very woman of my heart - Lily Evans, lads.'
The marauders were sprawled lazily in the common room late at night, with Remus and Sirius by the fireplace, Sirius spread on his lap completely and Remus idly playing with his silky hair.
Peter was on the couch, snoring deeply. He needed the rest to chase after Mary for an entire term after all!
James was proudly talking about the events of the entire day but neither of the awakened marauders was actively listening.
'And then she called me an annoying git only thrice the whole day! That must count for something, right? She also said she'd never met anyone like me in her entire life and proceeded to walk away from me, probably trying to hide her blush.'
'Am I the only one who's noticing that Jamie's eyebrows are missing?' Sirius asked, looking up at Remus.
'No Pads, we can all see it too, but apparently our Prongs here is convinced that it's a symbol of Lily's steadily diminishing hatred towards him.'
'Yes, Moony! She could've easily hexed me and strapped my own underwear to my head like the time she did in the second year, but you see! The times are changing. She's growing to love me.' James said rather dreamily.
'At this rate, she'd probably be your valentine by the time you're on your deathbed, Prongs. Your first and the very last date with her would be your own funeral, but hey, looks like you're going in the right direction though!'
With this, Sirius showed his thumbs up and grinned at James sincerely.
This time when they were both sprawled out on the floor wrestling aggressively with each other, Remus looked over at his boyfriend with an adoration and love that he knew wasn't going away anytime soon.
Sirius had his heart, and Remus had his.
And they were gonna be just fine.