Chapter 1
‘Sirius?’ Harry looked across the table, it was early so only a few of them were there and Harry had wanted to ask this question for a while.
‘Yes, Harry? Finally going to ask me the question that has clearly been wearing away at your mind for the past week?’
‘You know how I don’t have a soulmate mark?’
Remus looked up from his newspaper, having a slight idea of where this may be going but Sirius didn’t seem too worried and Molly was still casually walking around the kitchen, not listening to the conversation.
‘Yes? If you’re going to ask if not having a couple of letters on your arm makes you any less of a wizard that the rest of-’
‘No. No, I wasn’t. I know that not all wizards get marks. I just wanted to know if my dad had one, that’s all.’
Sirius paused and leaned back in his chair, though before he had the chance to answer, Remus put down his paper and nodded. ‘Yes, Harry, he did.’
‘What?’ It was Sirius who spoke then, not Harry. Harry didn’t know why he looked so surprised at that response, surely he would know if Remus did?
‘James had a mark. He got it when he was 15 just like the rest of us.’ He took a sip of his tea, not looking away from Sirius for a second.
‘I knew there was a chance he had one and was hiding it but-...why did he tell you and not me?’
Remus scoffed and looked away, looking down the table, avoiding the gazes of both Sirius and Harry. ‘Why wouldn’t he tell me? Am I not trustworthy enough? Did you think we weren’t close enough for it?’
‘It’s not that, Remus. I just don’t get why he would tell one of his friends and not the other. I told you all about mine the second I got it. We were always honest about that kind of thing. Did Pete know too?’
Remus still didn’t look up from the table. ‘Yup. He told us both a few minutes after he got it. You were still asleep.’
He was silent for a moment, then: ‘This is fucking pathetic.’
Molly’s head snapped up at that. ‘Language! This may be your house, Sirius Black but you can’t go around saying such words around children.’
‘He’s not a toddler, Molly.’
She only shook her head and went back to what she was doing.
‘Why didn’t he tell me? Why didn’t you tell me?’
‘Because we knew you’d get angry if you found out.’
Sirius leaned forward and Harry suddenly felt bad for bringing up the topic. ‘Why would I be angry and not you? Surely I wouldn’t be as bad as my mother when she found out that I had your initials on my arm?’
Remus shook his head, looking back at Sirius blankly. ‘No. You would be worse.’
‘Remus, she threatened me with the cruciatus curse.’
‘Exactly.’
Sirius leaned back and huffed, leading Harry to feel the need to interrupt this…tension that had formed.
‘So my dad had a soulmate?’
‘Yes.’
‘And I’m getting the impression it wasn’t my mum?’
Remus smiled. ‘No. He did love her but they weren’t soulmates. He had already lost his soulmate by that point.’
Sirius looked up again, even angrier than before. ‘Oh, so now he apparently lost his mark, one of the most painful things somebody can experience, whilst I had no idea?’
Remus nodded again. ‘Correct.’
Harry frowned. ‘When?’
The year before you were born. Your father was 19 years old.’
Sirius still hadn’t moved, remaining in whatever strop he had decided on placing himself in.
‘So…you know who it was? My father knew his soulmate and they died? Did he ever tell you who it was?’
‘Ah, I knew alright. It was quite obvious. The initials could belong to anybody but we knew that there was only one person it was likely to be. Not only was it the handwriting but we knew somebody with those initials already and James was pretty sure it was them. We’d known them for a few years at that point and he had noticed taking a certain liking to them, not that he was able to admit it, of course, Sirius would have gone ballistic and he was sure they would reject him if he asked.’
‘So he really had a type then?’ Harry remembered hearing similar things about how his father had been with his mother and was glad when Remus laughed.
‘Yes, quite.’
‘Was it you?’ He was looking down along his nose in that snooty way only a boy with such a posh upbringing would.
Remus looked at Sirus with a look of slight amusement on his face.
‘What?’
‘You said I would be angry. Was it you? Were you his soulmate?’
‘No, Sirius, of course it wasn’t me. We had each other, if you have more than one soulmate, you have both, or all, of their names on your arm, don’t you? That wouldn’t work at all, stop being ridiculous.’
Sirius only seemed to be getting angrier.
‘Well, I don’t understand! Who could it possibly be if not you? Who else could I be angry over? Unless it was my bloody father, I really don’t see what you mean!’
Once again, Harry regretted saying anything. Although…he was just as curious as Sirius, so he piped up, looking at Remus in a way that made it almost impossible to say no. The curious orphan who just wants to know about his parents face had never failed him before and he doubted it would now.
‘Who was it? What were the initials?’
Remus paused for a few seconds, then, without looking at Sirius, he spoke so quietly that anybody more than a foot away wouldn’t have thought he had said anything at all. ‘Seeing as he’s no longer…here…to stop me, I suppose there is no harm in you knowing. The initials your dad had on his arm, the ones he covered up until they faded 15 years ago.’ He took a deep breath still not looking at Sirius, as though looking at him would stop him from wanting to say anything further. ‘They were….well...The initials on James’ arm were R.A.B.’
It was silent for a moment.
Then Sirius slammed his fist against the table and stood up, the fury in his face almost strong enough to kill a man.
‘BULLSHIT!’
Molly started to scold Sirius again and the sound of the portrait in the hall beginning to screech again mixed with it, making it that Sirius had to yell even louder to be heard over the top of them.
‘YOU ABSOLUTE FUCKING LIAR, REMUS LUPIN! WHY THE FUCK WOULD YOU SAY THAT? NOT ONLY TO HARRY BUT TO ME? FUCK YOU!’
Remus’ face did not falter, still looking as calm as ever.
‘See? I told you that you wouldn’t take it well. I suggest you go upstairs and calm yourself down from that selfish rage because it isn’t helping any of us, least of all Harry. Go.’
Sirius almost yelled again but then sighed and stormed off, the sound of a few others waking up due to the noise echoes throughout the house but Harry ignored it and turned back to Remus, still curious as ever.
‘So…this R.A.B, my dad loved them?’
‘Yes, they were seeing each other for almost the entirety of our 6th year and most of our 7th too, before things went wrong. But that’s not what you want to hear right now. The point is, yes, they were soulmates, of course they loved each other. You father loved him dearly.’
Harry hesitated. ‘Him?’
‘Oh, yes.’
‘Oh, okay. I’m not being rude, I just never thought that he would love someone apart from my mother in the first place so it’s sort of just surprise after surprise, that’s all.’
Remus smiled, nodding. ‘Of course.’
‘Thank you for telling me. I’m sure Sirus will calm down eventually.’
‘It’s no problem, Harry. No problem at all.’