Beautiful
The present
5th of September 1976, Sunday
Hogwarts, Potions Tower
Most stories start on a beautiful day, with the sun shining brightly in a clear blue sky and everyone happy and relaxed, sitting outside. Enjoying the sun. Laughing with their friends. Breathing in the fresh air.
This story started much the same, with the grounds of Hogwarts littered with students, enjoying the last rays of sun before fall and winter took them all away from the Scottish hills.
But Regulus stayed resolutely inside. Hiding inside the Potions classroom, bend over a bubbling blue potion and ignoring the constant chatter of one of his fellow Slytherins. Nora was sitting on the other side of the room, on the desk of their professor, trying in feign to open one of the drawers.
“C’me on, Reg, what if there’s not any more sunny days this year?” Kicking her feet up and onto the nearest desk, she leaned back, letting her unruly curls sway past her shoulders. She’d once given him a one hour lecture on good haircare, forcing him to acknowledge the tiny ringlets with begrudging admiration. “Even Lip and Arry are outside!”
He dropped in three drops of Snallygaster blood, watching in fascination how the bubbly potion changed from bright blue to a dark shade of pink. “No one is stopping you,” he muttered, shooting an absent glance at the girl before scribbling down the changes in his notebook.
“Ugh you know Cecile will be with them, you can’t expect me to handle her alone.” Making a noise of discontent, Nora left the desk to walk to the windows, pushing them open. “Look at that, the sun! The real, actual sun! We’ve got to go outside. I will drag you outside if you don’t come, okay?”
Regulus snorted, he’d like to see her try. Flicking his wrist, he silently summoned one of the dove feathers on the other table to his palm. “Watch out,” he mumbled, holding it over the potion after leaning back as far as he could with still having a clear view of the potion. Slowly, he lowered the tip inside, eyes wide with excitement.
The potion sizzled loudly, but the feather dipped inside without burning or exploding, Regulus moved back closer.
“What were you trying to make again?” Nora asked, going to his side. Giving him a pointed look, she swayed around the littered ingredients and notes on the floor. “Maybe Kalin will even be there.”
“Improving, not making.” Regulus pulled the feather out and grinned. “And succeeding, not trying.” Carefully placing the feather down on the table, he picked up his quill and started scratching away in his notebook.
“Yeah, sure, improving, but what?”
“You’re familiar with alchemy, right?” Glancing at the feather, Regulus nodded, still grinning broadly. The dove’s feather that had been fluffy and white before he’d put it in the potion, had changed into a shiny silver, every strand of the feather still visible, but silver and – Regulus reckoned – sharp.
“You’ve transmuted a feather to steel?” Nora muttered, leaning closer and already reaching out to touch it.
“I wouldn’t do that,” Regulus said. “If I succeeded, this feather is now similar to a carbon steel blade.”
“Well, how do you know you succeeded?”
Hearing the challenge in Nora’s voice, flicked his wrist. “Running tests.” Scribbling his notes down, he grinned. “And some more tests.”
“Oh, yeah and let me guess, some more?” Nora went around Regulus to reach his bag and lifted it up resolutely. “What’s in this?”
“Stuff.”
“Right, unimportant stuff, I reckon? Because if you don’t get up and take me outside right now, I’m dropping it out of the window so fast you won’t have anything to do but go outside to retrieve it again.”
Now, Regulus wasn’t one easily intimidated. Growing up with his family, it was nearly impossible. And he also wasn’t one that let it slide when someone threatened him or his things, but he also knew better than to keep valuable stuff in his bag, which he’d done anyways. So really, he should have seen it coming. He knew Nora well enough she’d turn to these methods to get what she want. She’d definitely throw the bag, if only to prove a point.
He didn’t have to be happy about it, though. “You will pay for this,” he informed her coolly, still going to his feet and waving his hand so all his books and notes shuffled together and slid into his bag neatly organized. Turning to his potion, he took out his wand and carefully spelled it with a dozen or so protection charms before moving the potion to the back of the room with a clear note saying it was his and nobody better touch it.
“I’ll stay awake in worry,” Nora answered dryly.
Regulus snorted, letting her take his elbow once he had his bag and cleared everything else away. The rule was that the male lead the female, but Nora never got the memo, dragging him out the door and down the stairs so they could leave the Potions tower.
The Outside.
Regulus wasn’t a fan of The Outside except for when he had his broom and he could fly far away from everyone that always came with The Outside. There were students everywhere, lounging in the shades of the trees or castle, or spread out on picknick blankets fast asleep or playing games. There were a fair few reading books and a couple making out, but mostly, Regulus found there were students being loud.
“So where’s everyone then?” he asked, his face carefully pulled in a disinterested expression.
Nora shrugged, looking around with a wide smile. “Probably at the lake, heard Lip going on about this water test thing? Bet you Arry dared him to go through with it, Candice was floundering about how dangerous it’d be.”
Ah, okay. Regulus allowed Nora to pull him down the hill to the lake, where the loudness slowly ebbed away, as fewer people stuck around. It was usually colder the closer you got to the lake, with more shadows and wind. Regulus always liked it better there.
Though he’d much prefer to be in the Potions tower right now.
“Hey guys!” Nora exclaimed, spotting the others before Regulus, not that he was looking.
His gaze had drawn to the students that had decided on the lake as well, he recognized most of them from face and a couple by name. But there was also the group he knew from name, face and personal dislike.
His brother and his friends. They were spread out around a large looming tree, the short one fast asleep and the tall one – Remus Lupin – reading a book. His brother was laying with his head on the lap of some girl – McKinnon, Regulus really enjoyed pretending he didn’t know these things – and was trying to snatch away the snitch Potter was tossing up in the air next to them. There was another girl – MacDougal – that was braiding a flower crown and chatting to Pandora, the only girl there that Regulus actually liked.
He hadn’t talked to her in a year or more, but he’d always liked the Ravenclaw.
“You got Regulus out,” the booming voice of Lip laughed, dragging his attention back to his fellow Slytherins. “Fuck, Nora, you deserve a prize.”
“Fuck you,” Regulus grumbled, sitting down after conjuring a rock for himself to lean against. Tilting his head back and to the sun, he exhaled. Fine. Screw Nora, but the sun was actually kind of nice. The blanket of magic the other Slytherins had put up around them bubbled softly at their presence, accepting their magic and making them blurry for anyone outside of the bubble to see.
“How’d you do it?” Lip asked, sitting down next to him and handing him a spliff. It was only for the magic Regulus felt around them, that he took it. “Thought you’d be holed up figuring out how to improve the Pyrites theory all day.”
Regulus nodded. “Thought so too, actually.” It was the plan, the great, fantastic plan. The one Nora threw out.
“Mon amour, you know Reg won’t ever say no to me,” Nora exclaimed from where she’d presumably plopped down. She’d been wrong in guessing it was only Lip, Arry and Celeste outside, Crystal, Kalin and Theresa – fellow Slytherins – were there too. “Is that my scarf?”
Lip barked out a laugh. “You damn well know Regulus would say no to you, he says no to everyone.”
“I do not.”
“Fuck you, yeah, Reg loves me more than he does you! And it wasn’t as though he didn’t figure the shit out, he said he had done it.”
Regulus huffed out a breath, this would be a prime example for why The Inside was better. “She blackmailed me,” he mumbled. He glanced at Kalin for a spell of a second, the boy’s blue eyes were already looking back at him, a tilt of a smile on his freckled face.
“That explains it. So, did you figure it out?” Lip asked, lighting his own spliff. “Tell me, would you, I’ve been working on that assignment of Slughorn and it’s being a bitch.”
Regulus shook his head, rolling the small thing back and forth between his fingers. “I did not figure it out, not the Pyrites theory that is. I figured out how to improve his steel potion. It was lacking and as you know, I’ve been testing the workings of Snallygaster blood, I think it worked on improving the-”
“Please, for the love of Merlin’s pink pants, can you both hold off on discussing school subjects until tomorrow? It’s a delightful Saturday afternoon, one of the last precious days of summer, I want to close my eyes and descent into sleep on the music of water rippling and the breeze tingling through my hair.”
Laughing, Lip tore of some grass and threw it in Arry’s direction. “Fuck off, you nut. It’s Sunday and the assignment is tomorrow!”
Regulus shook his head at the two, fighting the urge to get up and go back inside. Nora might still go through with tossing his bag out. Into the lake or something. Though the girl in question was wrapped up in a conversation with Celeste that involved a lot of gesturing and no lack of rude words, from what Regulus could hear.
He shot a glance at his brother and his friends, they were being loud and obnoxious, as usual. It was unfair, he decided, watching the group collectively burst out laughing about something he’d probably never know. Not that they were laughing, screw that, he laughed plenty. But that.. He couldn’t put his finger on it. Life was just unfair.
“Mother wrote me, there’s going to be a dinner next weekend that I need to attend,” Lip said softly, too soft for the others to hear.
A chill shot down Regulus’s spine, the words of his own mother’s letter rerunning through his mind. “Yeah,” he mumbled, toying with the hem of his sleeve, “I’ll be there too.”
“D’you think it’ll be with… him?”
He shrugged, glancing back up at the sun, it had already lowered considerably and was now casting lights on the lake. “Might be. It’s not the first time we’ve been pulled out of school for a dinner with no real reason.”
Lip didn’t answer, only exhaled a cloud of smoke.
Why this story also started on this day, no one really knew. It had been a normal day, nothing different, no changes whatsoever. If anyone asked Regulus why he thought it started that day – not that he’d ever tell anyone that he did think it – he’d shrug and say he hadn’t a clue.
But he did. He remembered perfectly. That moment. A single moment that could’ve been dismissed and never thought about again, but instead, he remembered it. Later. After days- weeks. That flicker of a moment. A second. Where his gaze flittered back to the other group of students, to his brother that had fallen asleep on the lap of the girl with a muggle magazine, to the tall boy with scars and a book, to the short boy that had now awoken and was ooing and awing at the laughing boy playing with a flying, golden ball. Potter caught his snitch and his gaze snapped down, right to where Regulus was sitting, his gaze meeting Regulus’s and not leaving.
A second. Maybe two. Potter’s hazel eyes were only thing Regulus could see, before he snapped his gaze away, fixed it back on the smoke Lip was blowing out and focusing his attention back on the story Arry was loudly telling everyone. But his mind was racing. Nothing. It meant nothing. Beautiful, his mind whispered traitorously. Nothing. Gazes caught. Potter had probably looked away as well. In an hour, he’d have forgotten.
And he had.
An hour later he’d switched places and was laying on the grass next to Kalin and Theresa. Theresa was describing the shapes she saw in the clouds and Kalin was tracing figures on the back of Regulus’s hand with his own, both hands hidden under his cloak. Exhaling softly, gaze on the sky, Regulus decided that maybe he wouldn’t take revenge on Nora. It was quite nice, this Outside.
∞
The past
23rd of July 1966, Saturday
Cygnus and Druella Black’s Mansion – garden
In a world where children with magic in their feigns were blessed with drawings or words sketched onto their skins, it was sometimes odd how it was the pure magical families that despised them most.
Regulus was five years old when he first learned about the marks. He was at his aunt and uncle’s mansion, sitting on the edge of their pool with his feet swinging up and down to admire the tiny ripples on the surface of the water he was creating, when his gaze was drawn to a peculiar black design drawn onto his cousin’s shoulder blade.
“That’s my mark,” Andromeda explained, swimming over and allowing the young boy to inspect it more closely. It was a shield made of a detailed design with vines of rosemary wrapped around it, curling up its sides. It moved. The vines moved slowly in the wind.
“A mark?” Tracing the black lines, his silver eyes were wide with awe. He’d never seen anyone with ink on their skin, except for strangers on the street that his parents forbade him to ever go near.
Bellatrix, his other cousin, let out an indignant laugh. “A stain,” she said, eyeing the drawing distastefully. “Something that is best to ignore.”
Andromeda send her an annoyed look, shaking her head in disagreement. “It’s a mark that you will get as well, Regulus. When you turn eleven years old. Someone else, a boy or a girl, they will have the exact same mark as you do. When you touch them for the first time, they will change shape- mine used to be an empty shield with leafless vines that never moved before I met my-” Her eyes snapped to Bellatrix, whom had lifted herself out of the water and onto the edge on the other side of the pool. “My person,” Andromeda settled on, huffing out a breath. “And when you’ve seen their mark and they have seen yours, they’re supposed to gain colour.”
“Really?” A person? His person? “Everyone has one?” Regulus found it a bit unrealistic. How could everyone have a mark? And, if everyone did, how did only two people have the exact same one? “How is that even possible?”
Andromeda smirked. “Why, magic of course.” She swam away backwards, pushing her fingers over her head to press down her unruly curls. “Your person’s supposed to make you a better version of yourself, complement all the good parts in you as you will in them. Most people say they never truly felt complete before they met their sou- person.”
“Do not listen to her,” Bellatrix cut through. The fourteen year old eyed her sister with obvious disinterest, flicking her wrist up so a wave of water washed over the girl. “My sister is a romantic. You don’t have a person, Regulus. Maybe there’s someone with the same mark, but so what? They will not do you any good. You are a whole person on your own and you do not need some ridiculous self-absorbed nobody to ‘complement’ or ‘complete’ you.”
Bellatrix got to her feet with an air of elegance Regulus could only hope to achieve one day, moving around the pool so she could come to a stop right behind him, eyes narrowed slightly. “Do yourself a favour and stay away from anyone that might have the same mark as you do, they will try to get into your head and make you miserable. Mark my words.”
She left swiftly after that, slipping on her robe and stepping back inside. Regulus watched her go thoughtfully, he hadn’t seen any mark on his cousin. Perhaps she hid it with magic, he hadn’t looked well enough to see the tell-tale glimmer. He wondered if his parents were soulmates, he’d never seen any mark on them either.
Glancing at Andromeda, whom was slowly making laps through the pool, he frowned. “Does truly everyone have a mark? And are they always on your shoulder?”
“Yes and no,” his cousin answered, glancing at him. “Every human with magic, has a mark. This includes squibs and muggleborns or halfbloods.”
Regulus gasped softly at the words, jerking his head. “Squibs have no magic.”
“Of course they do, they simply have too little to use a wand. If they didn’t have any magic, they’d be called muggles,” Andromeda answered solemnly. “And as for the location, it’s different for everyone. Some people have their mark on the same place, others don’t. I have mine on the same location as a friend of mine, yet we do not have the same mark.”
“Does Bella have a mark?” Regulus questioned, leaning forwards eagerly.
The fifteen year old chuckled. “Yes, she does. Ever since she turned eleven. She chooses to hide hers, many others do and many don’t. You can chose for yourself once you get yours.”
Regulus thought about it, wondering both what his mark could be and where it could be placed. What if it was near his face? He would cover it up then, obviously. Or what if it was really ugly? He liked the shield one his cousin had, he might not even want to cover it up if it was pretty like that.
∞
The present
6th of September 1976, Monday
Hogwarts, Potions Tower
Regulus was safely back in the Potions tower, tables shoved to the sides and books littering the floor around him. He was in an abandoned classroom this time, it was drafty from the broken windows and all the chairs were broken or had splinters, but that was fine. Regulus had a coat and spells to make the floor comfortable.
“You are the worst,” Nora declared, announcing her presence as she stepped inside. Slamming the door shut, she manoeuvred her way through his clutter so she could finally settle down on the floor next to Regulus. “How could you leave me with that man?” Picking up a pile of sheets he’d torn out of his notebook, she shuffled through them, scanning the notes. “He held a half hour speech on the importance of his slugclub before he continued to talk about his ‘special’ relationship with the minister for fifteen minutes. Fifteen minutes, Regulus, I’m half convinced they’re shagging. If I wasn’t fully convinced he was doing professor Amparo behind closed doors.”
Regulus wasn’t impressed. “What are you doing here?”
“Ouch, I’ll try not to take it personally.” She pulled up one of the sheets. “This one makes sense.”
“Yeah except it didn’t work, no matter the concentration, it kept exploding,” Regulus sighed, giving a resigned look to the shirt he’d lost in the process. The burned item lay discarded to the side of the room, no use working in burned clothes, he just put on a new one.
Nora shrugged. “Maybe it’s not about the concentration but about the age, I overheard someone talking couple days ago about the importance of age. I know,” she hurried on, seeing him open his mouth to retort, “I don’t mean about how old the blood is but the age of the creature.”
Mouth snapping shut, Regulus frowned. “What? There’s no proof that the age of the creature matters besides some change in effects from blood of new-borns, but that’s because their chemical balance is different.”
“Right, yeah, except that there’s like this whole theory thing about if it did matter. There’s not a lot of research on it, so you can’t really dispute it either.”
Regulus stared at Nora, disbelief evident on his face. Not about the information, that would actually come of use and was definitely something he was interested in looking into. But the fact that it was Nora that was telling him.
Nora nodded, something akin to horror crossing her face. “I just heard that.”
“Yeah.”
“Yeah, I overheard someone saying it, I didn’t know that myself. So… It’s fine.”
Regulus snorted. “Maybe I should start working with them, apparently they’re smart.” Nora was plenty smart, but Potions definitely wasn’t one of her specialties.
Shaking her head, Nora snorted. “Wanna get lunch? Heard from reliable sources there’ll be custard!” Nora and her custard. A duo no one expected yet everyone saw coming, the horror couple. “I’m gonna try dipping chicken wings in this time,” she informed him when they’d gotten back to their feet and left the room, Regulus of course warding the room to hell and back so no one could mess with his notes.
∞
The past
27th of July 1966, Wednesday
Black Mansion – The Blue Room
The excitement about the marks was sizzling in his stomach, how had he never heard of them? Who else had them that he knew? Were there magical people that didn’t have a mark?
He was in the Blue Room, sharing tea with his mother and brother – well, they were having tea, he was practicing playing the piano. His mother was going on about something she’s read in the paper, he hadn’t really be listening. He’d found out about the marks only a few days ago and he hadn’t been able to think about anything else, he had to know more.
When their mother turned her back to them to look wherever, Regulus send Sirius a pointed look, luckily he was sitting right behind him. “I learned about the marks,” he whispered.
“What?”
Regulus nodded vigorously, turning to their mother to carefully ask her about the mark. He had a million questions. She had to know more, she knew everything!
Their mother tensed, her fingers tightening so strongly around the porcelain cup, the handle broke off.
“Do not ever mention that thing again,” she hissed. Glancing up at her sons and discarding the broken cup, she rose to her feet, a slap stinging Regulus’s cheek a second later from an unspoken spell. “Those things are for the weak. The pathetic excuses of beings that shouldn’t be allowed to breathe the same air as us, to walk among us as if they’re our equals, to pretend they’re like us. They’re beneath us, do you understand me? They have nothing of what you have and are nobody compared to you. You are above them, because you are my son. Mine. You carry my name. Have my blood. And you will make me proud because of it. Never speak of that mark again. It is not to ever leave your mouth again, do you understand?”
Regulus nodded, eyes wide and heart hammering in his chest.
“Tell me you understand,” his mother hissed, another magical slap stinging his cheek.
Regulus swallowed. “I understand, mother. I will not speak of it again.”
“Good. Now go to your room, I do not want to see your face again today.”
Silently, he put down his cup and went to his feet. With one last glance at the woman, whom had turned to the window, colourful lights dancing across her pale skin and shimmering black dress, Regulus hurried out of the room, catching Sirius’s gaze right before the door fell shut.
He went to his bedroom, closed the door and climbed on his bed with tears in his eyes. He rubbed his cheek and bit down on his bottom lip, he shouldn’t cry. Black’s didn’t cry. Crying was weak and he was not, should not be.
“Is Master Regulus okay?” His elf popped into existence in front of him, wide eyes filled with worry as he inspected the reddening cheek of the young boy. “I have ointment for you,” Kreacher muttered, showing a glass bowl.
“Thank you,” he whispered, a single tear slipping down. He didn’t mention the mark again, because even though it wasn’t the first time his mother used magic on him like that, it was the first time she’d done so like this. And he never forgot his mother’s reaction, the walls that had momentarily shattered behind her silver eyes, something that he learned, over the following years, rarely happened.
∞
The present
8th of September 1976, Wednesday
Hogwarts, Great Hall
“You’ve got mail.”
Gaze darting up, Regulus frowned. There was a large black owl sitting in front of him, paw stretched out with a rolled up parchment tied to it.
“Who’s is she? She’s beautiful,” Nora whispered, reaching out to pet the animal. That hooted back, snapping her jaws in warning.
Regulus snorted, scanning the words on the parchment quickly. “My cousin’s, Bellatrix? She’s a feisty one,” he said, too late. Nora yelped, pulling her hand back to safety against her chest. Lifting a piece of bacon, he fed it to the owl before it took off again.
“Your cousin’s? What’d she want then?”
“Wants to have brunch with me, tomorrow.” The parchment in his hand burst into flames, erasing the words before anyone else could read them. Nora’s expression showed her disbelief, but she stayed silent, thankfully.
“Mate, the lads and I are going to Paris for the weekend, you coming?” Lip yelled, arriving at the Slytherin table and dumping his bag on the seat next to him with a loud thud. Someone should tell him about the weightless charm.
Regulus folded his fingers around his cup of coffee calmly, already shaking his head before Nora could go ahead and accept on his behalf. “Sorry, I cannot. My cousin is coming to Hogsmeade and wants to have lunch with me.”
Nora send him a disbelieving look. “Thought she was coming tomorrow,” she said.
“Different cousin, you’re familiar with Narcissa? She got married last summer, to the Lord Lucius Malfoy,” he answered absently, wondering what his last class was and if he could leave it early to go to the potions tower.
Lip nodded, shrugging. “That’s fine, we’ll be heading there in the afternoon. My mum’s got this meeting with some baroness, she was going to pick us up after. Come on, it’ll be fun. Maybe the girls will come too if you come.”
The girls would come too if he came? Regulus arched his eyebrows in wry amusement. “Unlikely, but I will see about coming. Thank you for inviting me.”
“Please, they’ll come if you come, it’ll be a once in a life time experience,” Lip informed him, grinning knowingly.
“Fuck you.”
“Wait, so, Paris this weekend?” Nora budded in, looking between the two. “Who’s going?”
“Uhm, I am and Arry, Kalin and Edd? And Regulus, if he can make it,” Lip answered, staring back at Nora with wide eyes. He’d never been great at hiding his emotions, it almost made Regulus smile, though he was better at hiding his emotions and managed to maintain an indifferent smirk on his face.
Nora clapped her hands together, nodding to Regulus, oblivious. “You’ll be going. And I will be going! I’ll talk to Theresa and Crystal, they’ll come too.”
“If they’re coming, Cecile will come as well,” he informed her distractedly, having returned his attention to his food.
Nora nodded. “Yes, well, we’ll take our losses.” Turning to Lip, she grinned. “We’ll get our entire year to come, the Slytherins that is.”
“Not Wild,” Lip answered instantly. “My parents won’t have it.”
“Yeah, yeah, obviously.” Nora went to her feet and gestured at Regulus. “I’ll see you for drinks tonight, please, please don’t go back to the tower for the rest of the day. Those fumes will start fucking with your head, I swear on Merlin’s ballsack.”
Regulus shrugged. “I would love to see that ballsack.”
Lip chocked on a short bout of laughter, grinning up broadly. Once Nora had left – not without flipping them both off – he gave Regulus a pointed look. “Told you the girls would come if you came.”
“What?”
“You got Nora, mate, you got Nora you got everyone.”
Regulus snorted. “I do not have Nora, I don’t do friends.”
“Right, course, your whole friend thing. I swear, one day you’re gonna wake up and realize you’ve been lying your ass off the last couple years.” Lifting a spoonful of beans to his mouth, Lip nodded. “And not about the gay thing, this is not a phase joke, but a you’re-an-idiot-and-you’ve-got-friends-just-fucking-accept-it joke.”
Regulus scowled at him.
Lip blew him a kiss.
Regulus didn’t do friends, he just didn’t. Not after- No. He wasn’t going there, not even thinking about it. It hurt. Shit, it still hurt. Glaring down at his plate, he shook his head. He didn’t do friends. He couldn’t.
∞
The past
17th of January 1968, Friday
Black Mansion – Regulus’s bedroom
Waking up to white light filtering through the windows, Regulus’s entire face lit up with joy. Snow. He jumped out and raced to the window, pressed his nose against the cool glass. “Kreacher!” His elf materialized behind him. “Kreacher, look!”
“I see, master,” Kreacher grumbled, also looking out of the window.
Regulus turned to him, cheeks flushed and eyes sparkling. “Get my warmest clothes! Mother and father are still in Milan, no?”
“Until this evening, yes,” Kreacher nodded. “I will get it done, master Regulus. Does you wish a shower first?”
“Yes, please. Is Sirius up yet?”
“Not yet, should I’s wake him?”
“No, I’ll do it, warm the shower please?” At Kreacher’s accepting nod, Regulus jumped up and raced out of his room, to his brother’s. “Siri! Siri, look!” Jumping on top of his brother’s bed, he bounced up and down on his knees. “It’s snowing! Snowing!”
Sirius was a horrible morning person, but he opened his eyes this morning like someone had dumped him in freezing water, wide and shocked before he flung his body out of bed and to the window. Pressing his palms against the glass, he pressed his nose forwards as well. “Indeed there is!” he declared, his grin wide. Turning to Regulus, he wrung his hands together. “You know what this means, do you not?”
Regulus jumped up from the bed as well, feet trampling though he stayed on one spot. “I do, I do!” Giggling, he raced to the door. “Hurry!”
“Me?” Sirius yelled. “You hurry!”
Regulus had never showered and dressed so quickly. Decked in sweaters and charmed socks and trousers, he wrapped himself in his heaviest cloak before racing down for a quick breakfast and following Sirius out into the garden.
Sirius flung himself to the floor instantly, spreading his arms and legs. “SNOWANGEL!” he declared.
Regulus was already half way to the garden house, leaving tiny footprints behind him. “SNOWMAN!” he yelled back, entering the garden house he skipped the pool equipment and went straight to the shovels. Grabbing two, he raced back to where Sirius was already ordering his elf, Bean, to get them some carrots and buttons. “SNOWMAN!” he yelled again.
“SNOWMAN!” Sirius agreed, taking one of the shovels and starting their work on gathering the snow.
After two hours, one beautifully ugly snowman and fingers that had definitely lost feeling, they returned inside to warm up on hot cocoa and waffles. The elves were fuzzing over them, putting extra charms on their gloves and hats, trying to convince them to not go back outside again.
Sirius patted Bean on the head amusedly. “We’re fine, Bean!” Jumping up and going to the window that looked out onto the street, he beckoned for Regulus to come look to.
“What are they doing?” he whispered. There were kids playing there, throwing snow at each other and dragging wooden creations behind them – some of which were being dragged by adults, children on the creations.
Sirius grinned. “Those are sleds, I think! Andy showed me one once, they’re…” he lowered his voice, eyes widening slightly. “They’re muggle creations. You can go down hills with them!”
“How?”
“Like a carriage, but instead of wheels, they just slide,” Sirius said, voice full of wonder. “And they don’t need to be pulled because they go downhill!”
“That’s so weird!” Regulus exclaimed with a giggle, shaking his head. “Why do they do that?”
“Because it’s fun!” Jumping back and running to the door, Sirius waved his hands around. “Bean, can I have my things again, please? C’me on, let’s go see if Nick has a sled!”
Regulus followed him, unable not to smile widely at Sirius’s own smile. “You think so? Kreacher, can I have mine as well?”
“Of course, master.” Kreacher helped him put everything on again before they rushed outside, Sirius loudly proclaiming how sure he was Nick would have one. After all, every muggle had one, didn’t they?
Nick was their muggle friend, he lived across the street and was 8 years old, the same age as Sirius. They met a couple weeks ago when they’d snuck out during the day to visit the playground at the end of the street.
Sirius and Regulus snuck out to the place all the time, after Andy and Cissa took them there first when they were little. Nick had just moved into the street and he’d been fascinating, still was, really. Regulus could talk to him for hours, muggles were so weird.
“Nick! Open up!” Sirius banged his knuckles against the door, going to his tiptoes to press his eye against the peephole. “Nick!”
The door got pulled open after Sirius had shouted so loudly, Regulus wondered if they could hear it a street over. “Guys!” Nick was standing next to his mother, already jumping up and down with excitement. “Was hoping you’d show!” He was already working on putting his coat and scarf on, his feet trying and failing to go into the muggle boots he owned.
Muggle fashion was weird too. He wore a coat that stopped at his hips! How weird was that? Every muggle had it. Regulus pulled his cloak closer around him, grateful for the magic inside it that warmed his entire body nice and toasty.
“You lot and you weird cloaks, you look like you belong with the gnomes!” Nick laughed, following them outside after promising his mother to come back home before dinner.
Sirius snorted indignantly. “No, we don’t! We’re nothing like them,” he exclaimed, running forwards a couple steps so he could turn back and throw some snow towards them. “Gnomes are awful!”
Nick cried out in disagreement. “No, they’re not! Gnomes are great! Have you not seen the Gnome-Mobile?”
“Seen the gnome-what?” Regulus asked, picking up his own snow to shape a snowball and throw it back to Sirius. “We saw a gnome at our aunt’s once, she was researching it for her paper. It wasn’t very nice.”
“Yeah, it kept trying to bite us!” Sirius exclaimed.
Nick started giggling, shaking his head wryly. “You lot are a bit weird, you know that, right?”
“We are? Have you looked at yourself?” Sirius yelled, throwing another snowball.
Regulus cried out in surprise when it hit him straight in the face and took off after him, shouting everything he was going to do in revenge.
An hour or maybe two later they’d befriended a couple other muggles on the street. One of which had a sled! She took them to the small hill at the end of the road and showed them how to use it, her name was Sandra, she was 10 and she had bright pink clothes on. “I go skiing in this,” she’d told them proudly.
Sirius and Regulus had both been unwilling to admit they had a clue about what that was, so they’d just nodded and kept staring at the sled. It was fascinating.
“Okay, who wants to go first?”
Sirius went first, whooping and screaming in joy, throwing his hands up on his first go. Regulus took a steady step back once the sled was back on top of the hill and it was his turn. “No, thank you,” he muttered.
“C’me on, Reggie, it’s fun! You’ll like it, it’s like flying!”
How was that like flying? It didn’t even leave the ground!
“We can go together,” Nick offered, still grinning.
“I don’t know..” Regulus whispered, crossing his arms defensively – something his mother would have a fit at if she ever saw, so he quickly dropped his hands to his sides again.
Sirius gasped. “Can we go with the three of us?” he asked Sandra. “Please?”
“Yeah sure,” she shrugged. She was working on a snowman with one of the other girls who’s name Regulus had already forgotten. “Just don’t break it!”
“Okay!” Sirius took Regulus’s hand and pulled him towards the sled. “Come on! You sit between us, yeah?”
“Right..”
Regulus loathed to admit, but it was fun. It was really fun, actually. They went again and again and he put his hands up and it was almost like flying. Flying was better, but this… it came close!
Face flushed and giggling about a stupid joke Sirius had made, they went back home when the sun started to set. “My mum’s gonna go bonkers!” Nick yelled, breaking out in a sprint when he realized just what time it was, but still laughing.
They sprinted after him. “Bye!” Sirius shouted, running to the door of their house. “See you next time!” Regulus echoed the statement, following Sirius inside.
“Bye!” Nick yelled, disappearing inside his own house.
“See who next time?”
They both froze. Regulus’s heart slammed right up against his throat, the magic in his cloak didn’t do anything about the cold that he felt right now, chills racing down his spine.
“Mother,” Sirius was the first to answer. “Father. How was Milan?”
Their mother stood at the railing of the balcony looking out onto the entrance hall, fingers clasped together. Their father was standing a little behind her, looking down at them with unhidden disappointment.
“See who next time?” she repeated, voice icy.
Regulus swallowed, forcing his face to remain completely blank and therefor letting it fall into it’s trained, charming smirk. Sirius’s face mimicked his to a T. “Our neighbour,” he answered slowly. “Nick.” If Sirius hadn’t said it, their mother would’ve known with a single glance inside their minds.
“Nick,” their mother echoed.
Sirius nodded. The silence around them was deafening, heavy. Regulus felt like he couldn’t breathe.
“A friend of yours?” their mother finally broke it, hand trailing down the railing as she slowly descended the staircase on the right of the room. “A muggle?” The quiver in her voice scared Regulus, because he recognized it.
He was already steeling himself, already had his nails digging into the palms of his hands, so the blow he felt against his stomach wasn’t unexpected. But it still hurt. Their mother hadn’t even taken her wand out, sending the wandless spell silently.
“The neighbour boy,” she hissed. A cut this time, a long one reaching from the top of his spine all the way down. He could feel blood trickling down already. “Your friend?” Three cuts, gashes, like three whips had come down on his back at once.
Sirius made a soft, chocking sound. “Sorry.” His silver eyes darted to Regulus’s. He was feeling the same things Regulus was, he knew by that one look. It searched his, to see if Regulus was feeling it too. “It’s my fault.”
Regulus shook his head. “No. He’s my friend too,” he said the words before he could stop himself. He didn’t want Sirius to take the blame, he couldn’t let him take the blame. But he’d made a mistake. A horrible, horrible mistake. Blood drained from his face.
He’d just admitted Nick was their friend.
“Ah.” The smile on their mother’s face was horrible, wide and thin-lipped, pressed together with unveiled fury. “You do this now? You befriend muggles? Worse than mudbloods, worse than traitors, you befriend the scum at the bottom of our shoes? This is how you choose to thank us for all we’ve given you?”
“No- No, we-” Regulus fought the fear in his voice.
“We’re sorry,” Sirius whispered, his own voice sounding fragile.
Their mother laughed. “You’re sorry.” Another blow and another, a cut on his leg and a burn on his shoulder. “You’re a BLACK! WE DON’T APOLOGIZE FOR ANYTHING!” Suddenly she was screaming, her wand was in her hand and she was firing spells at them.
Regulus choked on a cry, his knees finally giving way and letting him drop to the floor. Sirius was at his side in an instant, curling around him. “We will do better!” he exclaimed, again and again, in feign.
“YOU DESERVE THIS!” their mother screeched, more spells of pain, it didn’t matter that Sirius was between them. “YOU DID THIS TO YOURSELVES! DISGRACEFUL! AN EMBARRESEMENT! HOW COULD YOU HAVE DONE THIS TO OUR FAMILY?”
It stopped, the constant onslaught of pain. “Get up.”
Slowly, every bone and muscle hurting, they helped each other back to their feet. Regulus was shaking, his entire body. “We will do better,” he managed to say anyways, his voice didn’t even tremble.
“You will.” Their mother nodded, her wand twirling between her fingers. “I will make sure you do better.” She was standing not a meter away from them. “I see now I have been too kind with you, too soft.” She scoffed. “Get out of my sight.”
They turned and walked away, Sirius followed him right to his room, where Kreacher and Bean appeared with ointments and bandages. “Mistress has ordered not to heal,” Bean whispered, large green eyes glossy. “Bean is sorry, master Sirius.”
“It’s okay,” Sirius whispered, he was shaking too. “Regulus too?”
Kreacher nodded shortly. “But we can clean,” he muttered, removing the bits of clothing that had stuck to the open wounds on Regulus’s back. “And in time it will heal.”
“Thank you,” Regulus whispered shakily. Leaning against the pillows of his bed, he closed his eyes. It’s okay. They’re fine. Tomorrow everything would be forgotten.
Nothing was forgotten.
Their mother forced them to study, make them lean every nasty spell she’d been casting on them all their lives. And she made them practice. On the elves. On each other. “Be better,” she kept saying, low and cold. “Be pure.”
It wasn’t enough.
One day, weeks after the fact, they entered the White room. They used it to duel and learn magic. Standing there, in the middle of the room, hands and feet bound together. Was Nick.
“Look who knocked on the door today,” mother whispered. “Wanted to see if the lads were up for a snowball fight.”
Regulus couldn’t move. Next to him, Sirius couldn’t either. Nick was crying, red cheeks and red eyes and his entire body shaking. He opened and closed his mouth, but no sound came out.
“He kept going on and going on, so I made it stop,” mother shared haughtily. “I thought it was time you boys had new practice.” She smiled, clasping her hands together. “Learn exactly what happens when you make a ‘friend’.”
“No.” Sirius took a step back.
Their mother tilted her head to the side. “I didn’t ask, son, I’m telling. Let’s start with the letter A, Sirius, what spell did you recently learn that starts with an A?”
Sirius jerked his head negative. “I can’t.”
“Do it,” their mother growled. “Show me that you learned to do better. Do it now, or Regulus-”
“Aegrum,” Sirius whispered.
Nick fell to his knees, sobbing. Regulus knew the spell, made you feel grief beyond anything, like part of you died and you didn’t even know why. He almost cried at the memory of the feeling.
“Good, good, now Regulus. B.”
The spells they’d been taught didn’t need a wand, they were simple and they’d been taught how to bend their magic to their will. Regulus felt his own tremble underneath his skin, it didn’t want to. But he’d been learning how to ignore that feeling, every time he spelled his brother. Every time he spelled Kreacher or Bean or any of the other elves, the lower ones that worked in the kitchen. Just pretend they were dummies. Just pretend.
“Bellum,” the word choked out of him. Nick couldn’t breathe, his lungs tightening from exhaustion and every muscle feeling like he’d ran a million miles. Like he’d just fought in a war.
“C,” their mother hissed, staring at Sirius.