First Day
Harry woke slowly, but even after his eyes were settled he just continued to lay there, looking up at the dark green, with stitches of silver, canopy above him. The Slytherin common room was as beautiful and soothing as he had refused to think it was the first time he was in it as a second year student who was desperate to know who the Heir of Slytherin was. The large window that showed the inside of the lake was stunning and he loved that the dorm he shared with his fellow fifth years had some smaller windows above each of their beds that allowed them to see into the lake, plus a slightly larger one at the end of the room.
The dark light seeping into the room from the windows was rather relaxing, and he had to fight not to go back to sleep.
Even though he desperately wished he could just go back to sleep.
He breathed shakily, deeply as he tried to occlude his bloody mind. He couldn’t…
He had to be strong, right? He couldn’t break down every time he saw his parents, or every time he looked at something that triggered a horrid memory. He couldn’t break down. Not again. He needed to act as if he had never been here before. As if he was completely new. As if he wasn’t older than he appeared.
He couldn’t break down.
He couldn’t let anything slip.
He had to be strong.
Brave even.
But how does one be brave when they are so bloody tired?
When they are so mentally and emotionally drained?
But he had to.
He had no choice.
He had to be strong.
He couldn’t, not for anything, break down again.
Especially around people who weren’t his family.
He needed to calm his mind. Clear it even.
And yet he couldn’t.
No matter how hard he tried everything was still there, whirling around, and it was frustrating him to no end.
“Harry,” he jumped slightly as the gentle voice of Severus Snape came from next to him. He looked at the boy standing next to his bed with a worried look in his dark eyes, “Are you okay?”
“Hm,” Harry hummed, sitting up and leaning his back against the headboard, “Just trying to clear my mind, or something. I can’t go breaking down again, can I?” Severus sat opposite him, crossing his long legs and looking at Harry worriedly.
“Have you tried meditating?” Severus asked.
“I… No. I don’t know how,”
Severus nodded in understanding, “That’s understandable. I can help, though, if you would like me to?”
Harry swallowed almost nervously, “Yes, please,” he nodded.
“Okay,” Severus’ lips tugged up slightly at the sides and Harry smiled at the other boy, “Close your eyes,” he said, his soothing baritone making Harry comfortable as Severus closed his own eyes, and Harry followed suit, “Now then, all you need to do is what I tell you to do,” his voice was so soft, “You need to focus on your breathing, the sound of my voice, and the little sounds all around us, and to do this you need to take deep breaths. In through your nose… and out through your mouth… In… and out… And we will just keep breathing… In… and out… Focusing only on our breathing, and the sounds we can hear… In… and out… In… and out… Until we just let go of everything… In… and out… In… and out… In… and out…”
Harry came out of his meditation to a gentle tap on his shoulder. He opened his eyes to find Severus smiling at him gently, and he smiled back. He had never felt so… clear before. Everything felt so… free. Like a massive weight had been lifted off his shoulder.
“How did you do that? You must have some kind of special power, because I have never felt so free before,” Harry said.
“I just spoke some words, nothing special about it,” Severus said, fidgeting slightly.
“Well, you’re magical, Sev,” Harry said.
Severus gave him a deadpan stare and Harry chuckled.
“Thank you,” Harry whispered.
“No problem,” Severus muttered before standing up and making his way to the bathroom to get ready.
He heard a groan from the bed next to his and turned to his brother waking up, Harry smiled when George looked at him, his eyes thin as he tried, though he didn’t want to, to wake up.
“Why do we have to wake up again?” George mumbled as he sat up, rubbing his eyes.
“Because we have to go to classes,” Harry said.
“Why do we have to do that again?”
Harry rolled his eyes, “Because we are students,”
“Why?” George practically whined.
Harry just chuckled and shook his head, climbing out of bed to get his clothes and stuff ready for the day as he waited for Severus to exit the bathroom.
“How are you such a morning person?” George complained.
“How are you not?” Harry said, grinning at his brother.
“I won’t deign that question with an answer,” George said, sounding rather put upon as he also gathered his clothes and items for the day ahead. Both making sure that their magically expanded, on the inside anyway, bags had everything in them that they could need.
When Severus left the bathroom, dressed and ready, Harry and George went in, the rest of their dorm mates were still asleep. And soon they were ready, too, and walking alongside Severus as he led them both to the Great Hall for breakfast.
And no one would ever guess who they saw outside the doors to the Great Hall. The bloody Marauders were there, making their way in for breakfast. Or, at least, they were. Until Sirius clocked them in his periphery and grinned mockingly at them, stopping himself and his friends from actually entering the room as he turned to face the three of them.
“Oi, Snivellus, do you want to introduce us to your new friends, or should we introduce ourselves?” Sirius said, and Severus stiffened at the words.
Harry smirked, though, “Oi, Sirius Orion Black, do you want to introduce us to yours, and your friends, other sides, or should we introduce ourselves?”
The widening of the four’s eyes was almost comical, “How do you know my name?” Sirius said.
“I’m psychic,” Harry deadpanned, “Oh, and James Fleamont Potter, I do believe you have something that belongs to my brother and I,”
“What on Earth are you talking about?” James sputtered.
“Oh, just a certain cloak that was passed from the Peverell family to the Potter one when the Potters married in. Nothing special. We will be writing to your parents to officially claim it back into our family of course, since it is rightfully ours by birth right, especially since we ourselves are descended from the youngest brother. We just actually have the name of Peverell, and so have more claim to it. So be prepared to say goodbye to your cloak. If you keep it from us, we do have more power than you and your family, and we would hate to use it,” George said, grinning at the boy’s ever paling skin.
“Nice meeting you,” Harry smirked as he gently grabbed Severus by the arm and pulled him into the Hall and over to the Slytherin table.
It wasn’t long before Regulus, Barty, Lucius and Narcissa joined them. Regulus and Barty sat opposite the twins, smiling at them. Barty in his Ravenclaw uniform. Severus said that they often sat together at the Slytherin table and no one paid any mind to it when he noticed George and Harry’s confusion.
“Good morning,” Regulus said, “Why does my brother and his friends look like they are planning something? And why are they so incredibly pale?” he almost sounded worried, but there was a glint of something darker in there that overshadowed it.
“Oh, they just had the pleasure of meeting us this morning,” Harry said sweetly.
Barty raised an eyebrow, “And what did you do?”
“Nothing,” George huffed, sounding rather affronted.
“I called Sirius and James by their full names, without being introduced to them, said I was psychic, may have mentioned their other sides, then George said we would be writing to James’ parents to claim back the cloak that is rightfully ours,” Harry grinned.
Regulus sighed, “You two are going to be troublemakers, aren’t you?”
“Of course not,” George huffed again.
Severus snorted.
“We’re going to be problem solvers,” Harry said, grinning at his mum.
“Problem solvers who make trouble,” Barty mumbled, shaking his head at them, but his eyes held nothing but affection, and happiness.
And Harry smiled as he looked down at his plate, eating happily… freely.
Classes went swimmingly. Although that was perhaps because George and Harry already knew it all. They had already done most of the classes, and they had been studying since they had arrived back in the past, and even before then. But it really just made things easier for them. They wouldn’t have to worry about their education too much, when they had so many other things to worry about.
Severus. What the Marauders may do to them and their family. Dumbledore. Their memories. The halls they walked.
It was hard. Walking around the school and remembering. But Harry knew it would have been a lot harder if not for the meditation he did with Severus that morning. He may be a natural at Occlumency, but his emotions were too high for it to be of much use. People couldn’t get into his mind, but it didn’t mean he wasn’t in it.
The meditation helped, though.
That was the main thing.
He didn’t have a breakdown.
Neither did George.
And that was something.
After dinner the whole family met in the Room of Requirement. Though Harry was shaking as he made his way down the corridor, with George at his side, both taking up the back of the Slytherin group.
He almost collapsed when he entered the room and the doors shut behind them.
Alice and Frank, along with Barty, were already there. But George and Severus helped him stay standing until they reached the sofas. Even though George was struggling, too.
He collapsed onto a sofa, with Severus and George on either side of him and he tried to breathe deeply, though shakily, through the memories of… the memories of Fred, and their unborn daughter. The memory of the Room burning down around them, of saving Draco and Goyle, of Crabbe dying, of the diadem bursting apart in the flames.
He squeezed his eyes shut, trying to block out the flood of memories as he breathed. He could hear people talking to him, but he couldn’t hear the words against the onslaught. He could feel gentle hands in his. And it helped, somewhat to pull him back into reality. Aways from his past, but the future of his current timeline if they don’t solve the problems that need solving.
“Harry,” he heard his mother say gently as the onslaught slowed to mere flashes of terrified grey eyes, and the broken cries of an older sibling, “Can you hear me, baby?”
Harry nodded.
“Okay, that’s good,” Regulus said gently, “You’re okay, Harry. You’re here. You’re safe. You’re not alone. Your family is here with you,”
Harry breathed shakily and opened his eyes. He saw George sitting next to him with bloodshot eyes and pain clenched his heart.
“I’m sorry,” he said, his voice trembling slightly.
“Not your fault,” George said, his voice quiet.
“Merlin, we really need to stop breaking down like this,” Harry chuckled darkly.
Although he was glad that it wasn’t as bad as it was the day before. That it wasn’t as powerful. And that they managed to last until the evening before doing it.
“Hm,” George hummed, chuckling just as darkly as Harry.
“You’re still grieving, both of you. You’re healing. It’s okay to break down every now and then,” Regulus said.
“It’s not safe for us to do so,” Harry muttered.
“Hm, maybe not in public. But when it’s just us, just our family, you can break down however much you want. You just fought a war. You need time to recover. And we will all be here to help you do so,” Barty said from his spot behind the sofa they were on as he kissed both of their heads and brushed his fingers through their dark hair.
“We’re here to help you both through this. The last time you were here, in this castle, it was a battle ground. It’s okay to not be okay. And you are both so very brave for coming back to try and fix things. And we are all so very proud of you. And if you need to let it all out every now and then, around our family, then you can. We aren’t going anywhere,” Regulus said.
Harry tried not to cry.
“And we will help you fix things, so that the future generations of this timeline don’t have to experience the things you did,” Severus said, his voice both soft and deep.
It was as soothing as it was that morning, during their meditation session. And Harry let it relax him fully as he let himself lean back properly into the back sofa cushions, his head resting on the back and looking up at his young father who was looking down at him with worried eyes.
“I’m sorry. I’m usually stronger than this,” Harry muttered.
And it was true. Despite everything he had been through, he had never broken down. Not really. Not until after the war. Not until he went to Gringotts and had his whole world turned on its head, again.
“It’s not weak to cry, Harry,” Barty said, “Not after all the crap that you have been through. Not ever. And, in any case, it is okay for you to not be strong around us. We are a family. And we will always support one another, through everything. If we need to cry, we will cry. And that’s okay. When we’re together, that’s okay. We look after each other. Always,”
“The same goes for you, George,” Regulus said gently, “If you need to cry around us, if you need to vent, if you need to break down, then it is okay to do so. We are family. And we will support you. Always,”
“Always,” everyone said together, even Harry and George joined in, though theirs were only whispers.
When the twins had settled a bit more conversation moved swiftly onto other topics. Though Regulus, Barty and Severus stayed close to the twins, not leaving their spots on or around the sofa. They spent time getting to know each other properly, talking about school, and what they were thinking of doing in regards to certain people. Though not much of that was discussed because they couldn’t think clearly at the moment and honestly had no idea of a plan. Or not much of one anyway.
They just knew they had to protect their family, however they could. And somehow get the horcruxes, destroy them, kill Voldemort, and destroy Dumbles.
It wouldn’t be easy, or most of it wouldn’t be at any rate. But they would do it.
Together.
Always.