NP Pimp Daddy
Dora:
reg….
Reg:
How’d the baby thing with Xeno go?
Dora:
Not great.
Reg:
What happened??
Dora:
he said he didn’t want to raise a baby
‘with some crackhead’
and a bunch of stuff like that
and how I’ll mess it up.
Reg:
wait so you have to raise it without him?
Dora:
Ig..
Reg:
We will be here for you.
Dora:
Yeah ik
I think he was right tho.
Reg:
he was horrible to you.
Dora:
Yeah but hes right!
Im a crackhead
I don’t want to raise the baby and mess it up
Reg:
You’ll be a great parent
ik you will
Dora:
No my mother messed me up with all the drugs she took
im not going to be like that
Ok?
Reg:
Yes ok
we will help you get clean
Dora:
Thanks
now I have to tell the rest.
Try to lighten it up
Reg:
Wow no one has ever asked me to lighten things up
~~
Dora Explora:
I have to raise it without Xeno.
Reggie Peggie:
damn right to the point.
Bartamust:
WHAT DID THAT ASSFUCKER SAY
Dora Explora:
That’s pretty homophobic
Ev Delphine 😝:
HOW
oh yeah Bart that is
Bartamust:
OH fuck you guys
IM GAY
Ev Delphine 😝:
WTF DO U MEAN XENO WON'T RAISE IT
Reggie Peggie:
I just realized we are calling the baby an it
Dora Explora:
😭
I just noticed tooo
Bartamust:
because we don’t know what it is!
Reggie Peggie:
It’s a baby dumb fuck
Dora Explora:
That’s not very light.
Bartamust:
WELLL NOO SHIT
I thought it was a horse.
Ev Delphine 😝:
You did?
and I’m the himbo
😹
Reggie Peggie:
wow that was sad.
Dora Explora:
KNJNVFJKNF
Bartamust:
🤦
Ev Delphine 😝:
whatever.
is
+ ############
Xenos Phone number?
Reggie Peggie:
wtf
Bartamust:
OMFG
Dora Explora:
Wth yeah
why…
Ev Delphine 😝:
Great.
Reggie Peggie:
💀💀💀
Bartamust:
REG WHERE IS HE
Reggie Peggie:
idk prob at home
im at work.
Dora Explora:
Texting on the job is bad.
Bartamust:
BAHAHA
hold up im heading over there
I need to hear this phone call.
Ev Delphine 😝:
DW ill wait for you
😚
Bartamust:
Thanks bbg
Ev Delphine 😝:
NP Pimp Daddy
Reggie Peggie:
I would hate to ever see their private messages…
Dora Explora:
FRR
JCSHKBFH
😭😭😭
~~
Reggo:
hey furry.
FaceBook Mom:
Hey kitten whiskers💕
Reggo:
die.
FaceBook Mom:
cute.
Reggo:
eww
wrud
FaceBook Mom:
trying to help my Bestie 🥰👯 ♀️ 💕🤞 find his sister.
Reggo:
oh.
what happened to her?
FaceBook Mom:
she died a few years back I think
Reggo:
wtf are you digging up a body?
FaceBook Mom:
NO
Im just a slow typer.
😓
Reggo:
Oh
FaceBook Mom:
yeah so someone messaged him saying she was alive but won’t say where.
Reggo:
Maybe they are lying abt the girl being alive?
It isn’t too hard to find someone.
unless like me they
changed their name, id, gender, and faked their death
it would be hard to find her then.
but still possible ig
fucking dick.
FaceBook Mom:
Huh maybe she did fake her death
idk
Reggo:
yeah maybe.
FaceBook Mom:
Soo
what are you doing?
Reggo:
at work.
FaceBook Mom:
where do you work?
Reggo:
Im not telling you
fucking creep.
FaceBook Mom:
NO
I meant like the type of place
Reggo:
a Library.
FaceBook Mom:
YOU’RE A LESBIAN!!!!
Reggo:
no.
WTF does that have to do with anything??
FaceBook Mom:
I MEANT LIBRARIAN I SWEAR
Reggo:
Mhmm
yeah I am.
FaceBook Mom:
that’s hot.
Reggo:
how??
FaceBook Mom:
wait are you smart??
Reggo:
yeah.. why.
FaceBook Mom:
Ushicunhinduei
Reggo:
llmaoo ok
FaceBook Mom:
pls
PICK ME
CHOOSE ME
LOVE ME!!!
Reggo:
ew you watch greys?
FaceBook Mom:
whats your problem with GREYS ANATOMY
Reggo:
barty likes it.
FaceBook Mom:
oh so that means he has great taste
Reggo:
ew
no he doesn’t
FaceBook Mom:
WAIT
how did you know that was from greys???
Reggo:
…
FaceBook Mom:
YOU’VE WATCHED IT!!!
Reggo:
I was forced
FaceBook Mom:
yeah OK.
Reggo:
whatever.
FaceBook Mom:
wait why are you texting while working.
Reggo:
bc I can.
FaceBook Mom:
you are going to be FIRED
Reggo:
No they love me.
FaceBook Mom:
who does?
Reggo:
everyone.
FaceBook Mom:
😣
I have competition
Reggo:
yeah you do 🙁
FaceBook Mom:
I’LL FIGHT ANYONE TO THE DEATH
Reggo:
here I’ll show you how much they love me.
Reggo Video Calling: FaceBook Mom
FaceBook Mom:
WAIT
IM NOT PREPARED
I SHOULD BE GETTING DRESSED UP FOR A MOMENT LIKE THIS!!!
Reggo:
so you don’t just always wear the Bambi outfit?
🥺🥺🥺
FaceBook Mom:
NO but here's a pic of me in it ;)
FaceBook Mom sent an Image
Reggo:
wtf-
asdfdfsdgfds
FaceBook Mom Video Calling: Reggo
“Hello?”
“I knew you had to be hot!”
“What. Why?”
“Because no way in hell could you get bitches.”
“I get tons of… I can’t say bitches sorry.”
“You’re joking. oh my god.”
“uhm, sir would you help me?”
“I can’t reach this book.”
“here imma set this down so you can see why they don’t fire me.”
“Im coming.”
“hah you said coming.”
“here you go,”
“thank you, are you doing anything later?”
“Yeah. I am.”
“bye.”
“wait! do you have any uh recommendations?”
“yeah of course. these 2 here are great.”
“Kind of long and expensive, but amazing.”
“Oh uhm, what’s your favorite book?”
“Uhh, over there on that shelve. Best books ever.”
“Ok ill get those too!”
“okay choose some. I’ll be over here.”
“How much is that?”
“Not too much, for them.”
“Are they actually you’re favorite?”
“No. Just the priciest ones”
“OK uhm all of these.”
“Good choices,”
“heh, uhm how about tomorrow are you doing anything?”
“Yeah. I have a date.”
“Huh?”
“Here you go! have a nice day.”
“Uh, uhm, thanks.”
“Do you have a date Tomorrow?”
“No.”
“That’s mean!”
“And how does that make them love you?”
“Well, My boss loves me. I make bank.”
“OMG-‘
“Ew who says omg out loud,”
“Uhm, I do.”
“Reggie!!!”
“Shit. Barty and Evan are here.”
“Really?”
“Weguloo!!!
“Yeah.”
“WEGULOO! that’s great!”
“Shut up, What is it?”
“Xeno’s going to be pressing charges!!!”
“Yeah!”
“WHAT THE FUCK!”
“Huh?”
“Uhm, Hey can you cover for me?”
“Thanks.”
“What’s happening?”
“fucking idiots.”
“What did you guys do?”
“Nothing!”
“Sent death threats!”
“You WHAT!”
“You dumb shit!”
“I didn’t know we weren’t supposed to say!”
“Uughhh”
“You are so Fucking STUPID!”
“Both Of you are telling Pandora Right Now.”
“Uhmm…”
“Who’s that?”
“shit forgot, Bye James.”
“Who’s James?”
“Yeah?”
“Shut the fuck up you Stupid FUCKS!”
“Uh yeah, bye.”
~~
FaceBook Mom:
You are kinda like the hotter version of Gordan Ramsey
Reggo:
Jump off a cliff.
FaceBook Mom:
OK!🥰
~~
Prongs:
HIS VOICE IS SO HOTTT
Padfoot:
WHO
Moony:
Probably Wrong#
Prongs:
YEAH
WE FACE TIMED WHILE HE WAS AT WORK
ASIHUFHJNDKFNE
Wormtail:
so you got to see him in action ;)
Padfoot:
HAH
Moony:
Weird…
Prongs:
YESS
omcdghghiuysdecouh
Wormtail:
I wish I was home to hear that :(
Moony:
What did his voice sound like?
Prongs:
Graceful
and elegant
AND BEAUTIFUL
Wormtail:
NVM
I don’t want to go home.
Padfoot:
IS IT CHOCOLATEY SMOOTH
😹😹💀
Moony:
Caps on.
Padfoot:
SHHH
Prongs:
IM IN LOVEEE
Moony:
With someone, you’ve never met.
Prongs:
We Facetimed that’s like the same thing.
Moony:
it isn’t
Wormtail:
well at least now you know he’s not an old man.
Prongs:
MOONY he works at a LIBRARY
Padfoot:
NO STOP
BE QUIET
I DON'T WANT THAT WHORE TO STEAL MY MOONY
Prongs:
HE IS NOT A WHORE!!!
Wormtail:
god 🙏 pls save me
Moony:
Sirius is now hugging me so I won’t leave him.
thanks. I can’t breathe now.
Prongs:
Moony wouldn’t steal my man would you moony?
Moony:
I already stole Sirius who was your man, who's to say I won’t do it again.
Wormtail:
HAH
is he even your man?
Prongs:
Of course he is 🙄
Moony:
Yeah OK.
Wormtail:
Have you asked him?
Prongs:
….
LEAVE ME ALONE.
Padfoot:
HAHAHHA