Warfare and war crimes II
26th of February, 2022
wizard war criminal (she/they)oh i was thinking more flying around casting curses. like gas weaponry that you can just fly over while everyone below dies a horrible death, that's a war crime.
Queen of the Cards, Lady of EHoWjust take along an enchanted bag with prepared potions and bombs and what have you
honestly, magic is super inefficient when it comes to causing damage
wizard war criminal (she/they) burning people to death? potions that put you to sleep for eternity? obliviation??
Queen of the Cards, Lady of EHoWlove potions
Icarusu can't define human rights when you advocate magic rights
wizard war criminal (she/they)well, a while back, overlord and i had a talk about how we would use magic to kill people
Queen of the Cards, Lady of EHoWalso, nukes. all i'm saying
Helios [xe/xem]a bomb and you can get them easier
Queen of the Cards, Lady of EHoWyea but you dont get to see their pissed faces when they realise a muggle weapon ended them
Icarus what's stopping you from creating a spell that forces nuclear fission when shot at a target?
Helios [xe/xem]and take over the country/world right?
wizard war criminal (she/they)and i came up with the idea of transfiguring all the elements of the periodic table, which would, in short order, kill you, the city you're in, and then drop radioactive fallout all across the globe, ecologically devastating it for millennia
Queen of the Cards, Lady of EHoWi've already got other shit to research, i dont need the ministry on my ass for that
wizard war criminal (she/they)depending on what method you used, yes
Queen of the Cards, Lady of EHoWtalk about overkill lmao
Icarusoooh yeah just turn everything into a huuge hunk of radium
Helios [xe/xem]the ministry doesn't need to know
wizard war criminal (she/they) no, no. astatine
Queen of the Cards, Lady of EHoWdoes make for a beautiful dye
Queen of the Cards, Lady of EHoWwell as long as the ministry doesnt give a time turner, id be better served just stealing a nuke
Icarus time turners are a can of worms for me i haye that JKR introduced them into canon because they literally fuck up almost all the magic lore one can infer from canon
2nd of March, 2022
Queen of the Cards, Lady of EHoWif muggles cant see magical places because they have no magic, couldn't you just give them an enchanted item to circumvent that fact?
and, idk, get like 5 soldiers with machine guns when the death munchers try to storm the castle
wizard war criminal (she/they)oh boy is it wizard war crime time
Queen of the Cards, Lady of EHoWit's time for efficiency and a reduction of damage
Fiendfyre. In. The. Room. Of. Hidden. Things.
wizard war criminal (she/they):D :D efficiency! i love efficiency! why did nobody ever just fucking shoot voldemort from a safe distance
Queen of the Cards, Lady of EHoWwith all manner of cool magical stuff and heirlooms and what not
Queen of the Cards, Lady of EHoWthe hishe video on harry potter seems to me infinitely preferable to the canon one
wizard war criminal (she/they)lmao
StarsLove that I opened the channel to keys talking about war crimes its my fav time
wizard war criminal (she/they)just set a tripwire mine in the gate that incinerates anyone who walks in
since you can't apparate in hogwarts they'll have to get in somehow
chokepoints and massed fire my beloved
Queen of the Cards, Lady of EHoWwell in the movies they randomly all have the misty-flying-skill
wizard war criminal (she/they)ew the movies
Stars No seige weapons either, against a literal castle Why is everyone outside? Snipe them through the window slits
Queen of the Cards, Lady of EHoWi want archers in the battlements. if we can have giant stone melee fighters, we should have rangers, too
StarsDrop lava on them
Queen of the Cards, Lady of EHoWAYY
StarsPull a Shrek and pour boiling milk all over them
wizard war criminal (she/they)acid :D
StarsGet Seamus Finnegan to spew alcohol with that spell all over them and then light them on fire
wizard war criminal (she/they)!! tar! pour melted tar on them!
-can't see -covered in boiling substance -v e r y flammable :3
Stars don't ask me how I know this since you can make condiments, you can also use mayonnaise as it's very flammable
Queen of the Cards, Lady of EHoWrecently learned that alkaline substances actually cause more damage. with acid, your body can do some attempts at closing the wound, but apparently it doesn't work with alkaline solutions
wizard war criminal (she/they):0
Queen of the Cards, Lady of EHoWget the elves to start grease fires in pots and pans and YEET them at death eaters
and use the fact that there is earth everywhere to plant some dangerous-fuck-off plants
StarsWhy didn't Elves sneak up on them and do their version of apparition to the lake
Feed the giant squid
Queen of the Cards, Lady of EHoWget the staircases to vanish with death eaters on them
Stars Also, mermish folk
Queen of the Cards, Lady of EHoWget the local parselmouth to call all snakes chilling in the castle to kill the people who are destroying their warm, comfy home
Queen of the Cards, Lady of EHoWor just blast them with raw elf power
StarsI mean that might backfire
Queen of the Cards, Lady of EHoWsnap their fingers and drop chandeliers on their heads
StarsYeah ikr, half of that battle is solved if the elves just keep disarming the opposing wizards
Queen of the Cards, Lady of EHoWpull a carrie and throw any sharp objects at them via telekinessi
Queen of the Cards, Lady of EHoW*half of all problems, ever
StarsRanged options were so underutilized, why would I uselessly fire random spells when I could re-invent some war crimes
Queen of the Cards, Lady of EHoWget the loyalty of kreacher (we'll avenge master regulus' death blablabla), then have him apparate to voldis lair and kill all the fuckers
Queen of the Cards, Lady of EHoWfar too much close combat for an inherently ranged weapon
Stars Their wands are ranged weapons
But diversify a bit you know
Why use energy when you could throw a grenade instead
Queen of the Cards, Lady of EHoWthat's what i meant
Queen of the Cards, Lady of EHoWwhy USE energy when you can STEAL energy
surely there is a way to siphon away someone's life force and/or magic without all this dreadful waiting for months and months when going the cursed-objects route
wizard war criminal (she/they)i mean i think it'd be much more effective if you could get multiple people at the same time
Queen of the Cards, Lady of EHoWthat's the goal
wizard war criminal (she/they) make a bunch of cursed objects!
give them out to your enemies
Queen of the Cards, Lady of EHoWbasically, an area of effect spell that acts like a dementor but gives you the energy it consumes
StarsThrow a bunch of coins at the army with that duplication curse Even better, forget cursing the people and curse their clothing
Queen of the Cards, Lady of EHoWtakes too bloody long, not useful in battle or when pressed for time
StarsI don't think the average person could do that
wizard war criminal (she/they)oooooh, like deconstructing matter? or if you created an exothermic reaction and captured the energy
Queen of the Cards, Lady of EHoW ah yes, curse their stuff, one of my favourite tricks
don't try to summon their wand, try to summon internal organs, that'll shut them up
wizard war criminal (she/they) right, but it's much subtler, and while it takes longer and you get less energy per unit of time, you cursed multiple people, which will make up some of the difference.
wizard war criminal (she/they)ah yes, my favorite d&d warcrime, "heat metal"
Stars Yeah, like they don't have enchanted clothing, because Hermionie set Quirrel on fire, but there is nothing stopping you from cursing itching powder into their clothes
Queen of the Cards, Lady of EHoWyea but with all the raids lately and then the fact that someone might notice your magical signature
StarsI'm particularly fond of Shape Water used creatively
Queen of the Cards, Lady of EhoW also, the uncomfy association with the failed snake lord
wizard war criminal (she/they)my DMs always rule that "people's blood" and "people's lungs" are not valid targets :/
StarsAffecting someone's internal self doesn't work with my personal headcanon of how magic works, but it could work
Queen of the Cards, Lady of EHoW learn blood bending then
StarsI'm just saying that waterboarding is within limits and dnd worlds don't have Geneva Conventions
Queen of the Cards, Lady of EHoWmagic is about intent. if you intent for your aguamenti to take its liquid from a persons body, it shall oblige. bonus: you get to drown some other enemies
wizard war criminal (she/they)they don't even have a geneva
StarsYepppp
Queen of the Cards, Lady of EHoWall the better
StarsListen, dnd has so many options for murderhoboing if you look for it, it's not as applicable here since this is a large invading force, but that's why someone in hp needs to read up some wizard spells and get to work on Fireball
Queen of the Cards, Lady of EHoWthe ghosts can become solid if they focus. even when shunning muggle methods, you could give them potions that'll explode any second now and have them dive right into the horde of enemies
wizard war criminal (she/they)finger of death my beloved
animate dead my even more beloved
wizard war criminal (she/they)like AK but you get a zombie at the end :D
StarsAnimate objects my beloved
No Auror, I didn't kill him, that coin just rose up and hit him so hard it punched straight through his body by itself
wizard war criminal (she/they)how? well gee i don't know mr government man i'm just a friendly shopkeeper :)
Queen of the Cards, Lady of EHoWwhy not animate their food? much less suspicious if they just choked to death on a carrot
Stars I mean, you could Immovable Object something and then throw people into it. Of the two, the person is not an unstoppable force
wizard war criminal (she/they)animate dead is tho
StarsTragically, I must take a break from my occasional fun times of talking like a psychopath and do other things, but this was quite fun
Queen of the Cards, Lady of EHoWideally use a vanishing cabinet and immediately get rid of the evidence (and have the other one placed near an active volcano or at the bottom of the ocean)
wizard war criminal (she/they)or in space
Queen of the Cards, Lady of EHoW nifty, i shall remember that
wizard war criminal (she/they)farewell, 1/3 of the faceless competent dark lord
Queen of the Cards, Lady of EHoWpotentially quite hard to reach
wizard war criminal (she/they)true
Queen of the Cards, Lady of EHoWi'm afraid the second third will have to leave as well, since it's 1:40 am where i'm at
wizard war criminal (she/they)but it won't degrade the cabinet as much as getting set on fire or crushed
Queen of the Cards, Lady of EHoWalso true
wizard war criminal (she/they)goodbye!
Queen of the Cards, Lady of EHoW good night, happy plotting
6th of March, 2022
Queen of the Cards, Lady of EHoWGuess What, i just figured out a new, extra gory version to murder someone via animagery
or transfiguration if you aren't a tiny animal
Official Oldest BrotherOooh do tell
Queen of the Cards, Lady of EHoWif small animal: fly down someones throat and change back
if not: temporarily transfigure something large and/or toxic into a grape or some shit and have them eat it
Official Oldest BrotherBut would you both die?
Queen of the Cards, Lady of EHoWbest way to poison someone - have them think it's just regular food and once the transfiguration wears off BOOM they've got snake venom or something chilling in their stomachs
Official Oldest BrotherYessss
Queen of the Cards, Lady of EHoWdon't see why you would if you're skilled enough
Official Oldest BrotherI mean it’s so easy to kill people with transfiguration
Queen of the Cards, Lady of EHoWjust make sure you're not chewed/digested
Queen of the Cards, Lady of EHoWyes but this is a fun, explody way
Official Oldest BrotherTransfigure poison into water, give them the water, then it’ll change back once they drink it
Boom poisoned
29th of March 2022
allhailthewatcherReady and willing to help bury a body if y’all need help
Chaos Coordinator - she/herI love the support in this server all so giving
allhailthewatcherAlthough burying is so old school
Queen of the Cards, Lady of EHoWsame, always
LuciferPrince_666I actually can think think of three places to hide a body of the top of my head
allhailthewatcherHey same
It’s a thought excersize
LuciferPrince_666Seven actually
Is that worrying
allhailthewatcherNahhh we’re Slytherins we’re supposed to make contingencies
LuciferPrince_666K
Queen of the Cards, Lady of EHoWmay i introduce: feeding the flesh to either a dog or some wolves if available (how tragic that they were murdered by a wolf, you should really be careful when going in to the forest). if using dogs, put some acid on the bones or put them in a shredder
allhailthewatcherI mean I have a detailed plan for faking my death and pinning my murder on the closest person to me who I don’t like so
allhailthewatcher Ooo nice nice
LuciferPrince_666 I'm sure my dog will get sick
allhailthewatcher You could really only pull that once or twice tho before it starts looking odd
I Live In Seven CloudsTigers are better than wolves
allhailthewatcher Or people start looking for the rabid wolves and then you’ve drawn bad media to the wolves in your neighborhood
allhailthewatcher What
LuciferPrince_666 Tigers are really cute!!