Chapter 21
My house is big. I knew my mother was rich but I didn't know how rich her family had been. From my script, I remembered we had a small house in California. This house seemed bigger than Malfoy Manor. Not nearly as big as Hogwarts but still pretty big. It made me feel small in comparison. Even my room felt huge. I hate it. But I also love it at the same time. My room has a walk in closet, a king size bed with green bed sheets, a couple of mahogany dressers, and it's own bathroom.
I put my clothes from my trunk away, and look around my room. It feels like it could swallow me whole. Shadow is already asleep on my bed. There are a stack of books on a little night stand, close to the bed. I inspect them. They look like classics. The only one I recognize is The Great Gatsby. Not books I would usually read. This is probably something my DR mother set for me to read. She seems like the type of person to read these. I wrote in my script that I didn't really like classics, which is true in my real life.
I pick the stack of books up, and then aimlessly walk through the house. Or Manor I should say. The house is actually called Lafoi Manor. As I've been told by my DR mother. I vaguely remember moving here. I've learned that I have this version of me's memories. But all of them are very vague. Like I can see glimpses of those memories.
I somehow end up at the Manor's library, which is also huge. Rows, and rows of shelves filled with books line the room from floor to ceiling. Most of the books look ancient but I can see a few that look like they were made in this era. I walked down the lines of shelves randomly putting the books I have in my hands, away. The library seems to not have a system to how the books are organized. Actually they might be organized but some of the titles I cannot read. Some are in Latin, Greek and even Hebrew. All three languages that I cannot read or speak. I have tried to learn Greek but I didn't continue it due to my lack of concentration and procrastination. I should ask Hermione if we could study together.
"Your mother is going to fight you over where you place those books." I turn my head to the female voice. I find a girl about my age, maybe a bit older, with blonde hair and bright violet eyes, staring at me and standing in the doorway.
My mouth goes dry as I suddenly don't know what to say. "I-I.... She's going to argue with me anyway. Wh-who are you?"
The girl gives me a sad smile. "You don't remember me?" I shake my head. "Well I suppose you were little when I first met you. I'm Merliah Lafoi."
"Fe-Felicity." I reply.
"I know who you are."
"What are you doing here?" I ask, trying not to sound rude.
"My mother is finishing up some work with Mandy about the house. So she can legally live here." I look at her confused.
"Mother said this was her childhood home."
"It is technically, since she spent all her time here with my Uncle. My Uncle gave her this house." My brain becomes even more confused. Then something hits me.
"My mothers maiden name isn't actually Lafoi, is it?" The girl smiles and shakes her head.
"Now you got it. My Uncle is your mother's late husband." I gulp. I was always told that Lafoi was her maiden name.
"She never told me. What is her maiden name?"
Merliah shrugs. "Potter. I think you have a Potter in your year, don't you?" That's why Pettigrew said "Potter" when he was addressing me. That makes so much more sense now. And that's why Harry and I look so much alike.
"Y-yeah. Harry. Mr. Bigshot of the school." I roll my eyes but internally laugh. I know Harry, mostly, doesn't want the fame he has.
"His father is your Uncle. Or was anyway." She explains.
"Merliah!" Another woman's voice calls from the hallway. A woman that looks just like the girl in front of me pops up in the doorway. "Oh Felicity! It's good to see you again."
"I wish I could say the same. Unfortunately, I do not remember you." She gives me a sweet smile, similar to the girl in front of her. So I'm assuming this is Merliah's mother.
"I'm Eric Lafoi's sister. Eric was your mother's husband before he died." The woman walks up to me and pulls me into a hug. I freeze as she wraps her arms around me. Then, she whispers in my ear, "If I were you I would leave while you can. Be careful. Your mother isn't who she says she is. I don't want to see you dead." She pulls away from me, then walks over to her daughter, leaving me frozen watching them walk away. Her words echo through my head. Then before I know it a memory flashes through my mind.
My father from my DR doing something while my DR mom sneaks up behind him, taking out her wand. The memory flashes green and then nothing.
Tears fall down my face. She couldn't have killed him. I drop the rest of the book on the table and run to my room. I shut and lock the door, breathing heavily. I drop to my knees, forcing myself to calm my breathing. The memory is probably wrong. I could've just been imagining it. But the memory felt real. And my DR mother has tried to starve me before. She has also slapped me. She is also a death eater. She could be capable of anything.
I rest my head against the wall and close my eyes, letting the tears fall.
I wake up, to knocking on my door. The sun hitting my eyes through the window. It's already day time. I must've fallen asleep. On the floor. I get up and stretch. My back is extremely stiff.
Another knock sounds from my door, so I quickly open it, scared that it's my mother. Surprisingly, I find Draco behind the door, so I give him a quick hug and usher him into my room.
"I'm so glad it's you."
"Miss me already?" He smirks. I blush remembering that it has only been a couple of hours here and not a couple of days.
"Yes. I need a shower real quick. I just woke up. I may have accidentally fallen asleep on the floor." I scratch the back of my neck in embarrassment.
"Ok. Be quick." I nod my head before grabbing some clothes and walking into the bathroom, while Draco sits on my bed and starts playing with Shadow. I quickly take my shower then get changed and brush my teeth. As I am brushing my teeth, Draco wraps his arms around my waist and buries his face into my back. I relax into him, needing his comfort right now.
Once I'm done, I turn around to face him. "I have a lot to tell you and it's only been a day."
"We'll talk later. I'm gonna be here for a while." His lips hit mine and I melt into him. It feels like it has been forever since I have kissed him. God, he tastes so good. Why have I never noticed before? Maybe because I've been away from him. I don't know. I'm weird.
Draco pulls away first, lingering a bit first before pulling away completely. He looks at me concerned as he does pull away.
"Are you ok?"
"Like I said there is something I have to tell you. Come on. I want to show you the gardens." I grab his wrist and walk out of the room. His parents would probably get mad at him for holding my hand so I don't want him to get into trouble. I lead him through the Manor but unfortunately my mother stops me as soon as I get to the door.
"Where are you going?"
"I was planning on showing Draco the gardens." I reply as I turn around.
"Why would Draco go anywhere, willingly, with a brat like you?" My mother laughs. Lucius joins in but Narcissa watches me as my face flushes and I let go of Draco's wrist.
"Do you even know where the gardens are?" She continues in between laughs. I nod my head and look at the floor so my mother doesn't see the blush of embarrassment.
"Why don't you go by yourself and not bore Draco?" My mother rolls her eyes.
"Actually, I'm very interested in plants. Mother and I go to the gardens of Malfoy Manor every other day to do some gardening, so I'd love to see yours." My mother's jaw drops at Draco's response. So does mine, but I quickly collect myself. Before I know it my mother and Lucius are glaring at me.
"Go." My mother grumbles. I turn around and walk out the door, not bothering to wait for Draco. I feel Draco's presence beside me anyways so I don't care. Tears were already stinging my eyes and I didn't want anyone to see that weakness. We walk silently through the gardens, till we find a bench that is out of sight from the manor, then sit down together, his arm around my side.
"Thank you."
"I could've done more." I shake my head.
"That little bit was enough." I lay my head on his shoulder and close my eyes. "I wish I could go back with you but that probably wouldn't be much better." He wraps his other arm around me and pulls me close to him.
"I wish I could take you away from here." He whispers before kissing the top of my head.
"So the thing I have to tell you. I am technically Harry's cousin." I say quickly, so he doesn't interrupt, while pulling away from him. He looks at me confused but doesn't say anything, waiting for me to elaborate. "Lafoi isn't my mom's maiden name. Potter is. She was the sister of James Potter."
"H-how do you know this?"
"Eric Lafoi, my mother's late husband, his sister visited yesterday with her daughter. Her daughter was the one who told me. Her mother warned me that I should leave before my mother....kills me."
His face grows into concern. "And you believed them?"
"I know it sounds stupid but yes. My mother starves me. The only reason I have not to, is that they are strangers. Besides, someone thought my last name was Potter before."
"That would explain why you look like him. Except for the shaggy hair." He playfully ruffles my hair, making me relax a bit. Then, he scoots closer to me and kisses my cheek.
"If you trust them, then I will too." He whispers against my cheek.
"Thank you." I lay my head on his shoulder, while he wraps his arms around me. It's nice. The quiet. The peacefulness of the garden. Being here with Draco. Just me and him. His arms around me. It's a peacefulness that I want to keep forever. But it never lasts.
"Felicity!" I hear my mother shout from the house. "Come in for lunch!"
"If she lets me have lunch." I mutter as I pull away from Draco.
"I'll make sure she does." Draco mutters in response. I shake my head.
"Your father will get mad if he thinks you like me in any way. I don't want you to get into trouble." He gives me a glare and shakes his head, like for once he doesn't care what his father thinks. I'm not sure if that's a good thing or a bad thing. It might be. Again I'm not sure. For the story line, it probably isn't a good thing but right now I'm not going to complain.
"Your health is more important than me getting into trouble." I wanted to smile but instead I just froze. I'm not used to this from Draco. I know he cares about me but he has only ever seemed bothered by my eating habits when my mother has something to do with it.
"Don't seem so shocked. I care about you." He shrugs then takes my wrist and drags me to the Manor. I have to nearly sprint to keep up with him.
"In better circumstances, I'll give you a better tour." Draco doesn't respond but I can see the smirk playing on his face from where I am behind him. As we get closer to the Manor, anxiety starts to settle in. I don't want my mother to be there at the door waiting, but she is. Her arms crossed over her chest. Glaring at me but also faking a smile for Draco. I don't know what her problem is. Especially when she was making fun of me. Wasn't she the one who wanted Draco to like me in the first place. Not that I'm with him for her. I'm with him because I genuinely like him.
"What took you so long?" My mother says, scolding me, as Draco and I stop in front of her.
"It's my fault I wanted to stop and look at something." Draco cuts in, surprising me, but I don't show it. That would show that the lie is a lie. All my mother does is nod her head and motions for us to follow her to the dining room.
Our dining room reminded me of the one at Malfoy Manor. It had the same dreary feeling. A room that felt like it has never been used. Or it feels like it's not meant to be used. Purely for decoration. I look at the table, noticing only four plates. Meaning my mother isn't going to let me eat.
"Come have a seat, Draco." My mother says as she points to a seat. "Felicity, I believe you have some studying to do. Go on."
"She's not joining us?" Narcissa asks, surprising me.
My mother shakes her head. "No. The pig has eaten too much already today." My face flushes and then starts burning. My stomach rumbled, reminding me that I haven't had food today. I wanted to cry and run away all at the same time but I stayed where I was and didn't let tears sting my eyes. I'm not going to show any weakness in front of a room full of people who hate me.
"She could lose a little weight." Lucius chuckles. My mother says nothing, just nods her head in agreement.
"I'll just go. If I don't catch you before you leave have a good night." I turn around quickly and walk to my room. Tears fall as soon as I get there. How can anyone be so cruel? I pace around my room, muttering words that I can barely understand even though I'm saying them.
About 30 minutes later, a knock sounded on my door. I open it quickly, finding Draco on the other side.
"My mother is going to be talking to yours for a while so I'm gonna give us about another hour. However I did say I was going to go to the library." I laugh, then nod my head towards the library.
"Let's go." Before I can move, Draco cups my cheeks and wipes my tears away with his thumbs. I take one of his hands wanting to hold them and feel the roughness. His hands are usually calloused from playing quidditch and riding his broom. I place a kiss on his hand, then silently lead him to the library. He doesn't ask why, just follows. Maybe it's better that he doesn't ask. His presence behind me is comforting. Like I need it there. Maybe at this second I do. I shouldn't depend on it though. My mother showed how cruel she can be in front of people, I'm worried I am going to find out how cruel she will be when people aren't here. Draco won't be here to help me when she decides to show me.
The library is the same as when I left it yesterday. The books I had dropped on a table hadn't been moved. I'm not surprised.
Draco wraps his arms around my waist, breathing in deeply. As if taking me in for the first time. He kisses my ear down to my neck, lingering a little longer each time. Just for me. I reveled in that fact. This is something he only does for me. I lean into him, letting him move closer to me. Not like we can get any closer. I close my eyes letting his touch sink into my skin. Letting it be imprinted there for my memory to come back to when I need it. Which will likely be often.
I turn around and press my lips against his. Feeling energy I have never felt before. Like electricity moving through us. I think Draco felt it too, because he pulled me closer and lifted my chin a little to deepen the kiss. I hope he felt it too. His grip on my hip tightens but not enough for it to hurt. When I feel like I'm floating away, his grip on me is keeping me grounded. I can feel every place he is touching. All morphing into a feeling of warmth.
I was the first to pull away though i didn't want to. I rest my forehead against his. "What if I'm not the one you want in the end?"
"Princess." He breathed out. "You're everything I want and more." I swear I could feel my heart skip a beat. I look into his grey eyes searching any signs of a lie but I found none. Maybe I shouldn't be feeling this way at fourteen. Maybe I'm too young for love but this feels real and so, so perfect. I don't know how else to describe it.
I kiss Draco again because I'm not sure I could tell him how I feel. I prefer to show him anyway.
Draco pulls away first this time. He looks over my face, inspecting me almost. His facial expression is unreadable. I wish I could tell what he was thinking. He shakes his head.
"Are you ok?" I nod my head.
"Draco!" Narcissa's voice calls from downstairs.
"Eat after I leave please. I don't want you to get sick."
"I'll try to find a way to." He nods his head before kissing me one last time, then he turns around, muttering a good-bye.
"Wait." He stops and looks at me confused. "Goodnight and see you in a few weeks." He smiles.
"Goodnight." I watch as he leaves, standing frozen and smiling like an idiot. My fingers unconsciously trace my lips, still feeling the burn of his lips pressing to mine.
Night comes quickly. Not surprisingly, I wasn't allowed to have dinner. I was told to just shut up and stay in my room. Which I did. I read until it got dark. Now I am on my way to the kitchens to get a snack, though something tells me I shouldn't. I wouldn't be surprised if there wasn't any food in the kitchens, so I'm keeping my hopes low.
Everything is so dark in the manor. It's eerie and creepier than Hogwarts is. Hogwarts has some lights dotted around the castle but the manor is in complete darkness. It's a darkness that is almost deafening. The only thing I can hear is the sound of my heartbeat and my breathing. And my thoughts. Those are deafening. I hate it. My thoughts are being overbearing which isn't surprising. I can't sort through them at all. I wish I could. One thought after another. None of them make any sense.
Suddenly, I stopped in the middle of the hallway. I turned around and headed to my room, deciding it wasn't worth it. If she does have food in the kitchens, she might have charmed it to keep me away.