Crazy In Love

"You're like the root to my evil. You let my devil come out me. You let me beat the shit out you, before you beat the shit out me. And no matter how much, too much is never enough. Maybe cause we're crazy in love." Crazy in love by Eminem

The dishes were clean, bottles picked up and trash thrown away. Thankfully it seemed that the animagus has been living off of muggle takeaways for a while so they didn't have to worry about any food rotting away in the fridge. The apartment looked much better than it did when they got there about two hours ago to check on Padfoot.

James sighed as he cast one more cleaning spell on the rug in the living room to get rid of the mystery stain that stubbornly tried to cling to the warm brown carpet.

It's been about a month since Walburga's funeral and Sirius was...

He wasn't doing very well at all. James would be lying if he said that he wasn't at least partially surprised at that. Sirius was never close to his mother and for good reason. Walburga Black was a terrible person and it seemed that she didn't try to spare her children of that awfulness. If anything sometimes it almost seemed as if she reserved some of her evil specifically for the son that seemed to so heavilly dissappoint her.

So no, James didn't expect Sirius to actually be so upset about it. Of course its not like he was expecting the animagus to be jumping for joy either... or maybe he was. Walburga really was truely awful, but she was still his mother so some off behaviour was to be expected of course but Sirius was so...

Honestly, even when he found out about his father's passing when they were in school, Sirius wasn't this bad.

When news broke of Walburga's death, Sirius seemed alright at first. He didn't seem upset but he wasn't up for talking about it either. He had a few more drinks than normal when they went out and stayed out later than usual but it wasn't too bad at first. Then the funeral came and went, Padfoot didn't show. Then he'd be an hour late for work, then he'd miss a days work, then he just stopped showing up for work entirely. He started drinking during the early hours of the day, sometimes he'd just dissappear, lots of times he just wouldn't show for plans that he had with James or Remus. They'd go to his apartment and either find him completely drunk or hungover, or some random bird or bloke would come rushing out of his apartment. That behaviour wasn't necessarily new for Padfoot but it never happened so frequently either.

It's like he's spiraling.

James looked up just as he heard the bedroom door down the hall open before closing again. Footsteps down the hall and Remus appeared, dragging a hand through blonde hair and letting out a heavy sigh.

"How is he?" James asked.

"Not worse but not much better either." Remus shook his head, "He refuses to talk about it, then again I'm not even sure he knew what I was asking about he's so hungover. If he'd just stay sober for longer than an hour we could talk to him."

James' lips pursed for a moment glancing over to the fridge in the kitchen, "Maybe we should throw out-"

"No, that won't help. He'll just go out and get more. I think it would be best not to give him a reason to leave. Though, I don't think it's making things better that he's here all alone." Remus sank down onto the couch, "I tried talking to Regulus."

James sat down as well, "What did he say?"

"Nothing helpful. They still aren't talking so, really, I was expecting that much. It won't help much if he won't talk to us about it."

"I just..." James sighed again, "I don't understand how it's gotten so bad. Sirius wasn't like this when his dad died and we were in school back then."

"Well, things between him and his dad were bad but not quite as bad as they were with his mum so, I'm not sure if you could compare the two. And besides back in school he was still-" Remus trailed off, realisation dawned on the werewolf as those blue eyes widened a bit and his lips almost parted in a gape.

James frowned, "What?"

Remus let out a soft sigh and shut his eyes as he rubbed his temples in frustration, "Shit."

"What?"

Remus opened his eyes. Looked at James. And then got up.

"Stay here, make sure he doesn't leave or drink anything else."

James just blinked as he stood up, "What-why? Where are you going?"

Remus paused just as he was pulling his cloak around his shoulders. The werewolf cringed as he looked up at James, something flashed before his eyes and he cringed harder. Then he just looked away.

"I need to do something. Just make sure Padfoot stays here and he stays sober. He can eat but no alcohol. Please James."

James took a deep breath, "Alright but-"

"Thanks mate, I'll be back soon as I can."

With that he left the apartment and shut the door behind him.

Remus was gone for three hours.

Three hours.

Fortunately, Padfoot was still passed out in his bedroom, so James didn't have to worry about keeping the animagus away from the beer in the fridge or the bottles of whiskey in the cabinets. James was still worried though. He wondered about what he could do. Maybe he could go and talk to Regulus himself, try and get him to make a bit more of an effort with his brother. But Regulus hated him, there's no way he'd get more than a word out before getting the door slammed right in his face. If he wasn't willing to listen to Remus then it wasn't worth trying.

James sighed, glancing up to the clock on the wall. It's almost five. Lily should be home soon. James told her that he'd be checking on Padfoot after work so she knew not to stay up for him, but if Remus stayed out any longer he might just end up staying here all night.

What could he be doing for so long anyway?

"Prongs?" James looked up just in time to see Sirius stop behind the couch. He was wearing a grey shirt and flannel pants, hair was a mess and he had a hand braced on his head, squinting at the man on the couch and frowning in confusion.

"What're you doing here?"

"I... I wanted to check in on you."

"What for?"

"Really mate? Have you looked in the mirror lately?"

Sirius rolled his eyes hard and just turned to make his way over to the kitchen.

"I'm fine."

"Clearly you're not. Do you even know what day it is?"

"Stop being dramatic."

"You're supposed to be in at work tomorrow, remember?" James said clearly causing the animagus to pause just as he turned towards the kitchen, "I can't cover for you with Moody anymore."

Sirius looked up at him, his eyes void of emotion. The same way that they've been for weeks. "Then don't."

"Sirius-"

"I didn't ask for your help, James. There's nothing I need help for."

James let out a huff of frustration and got up when the sound of apparition suddenly echoed around them. James' head snapped over to the door where the sound came from and Sirius frowned.

There was somesort of commotion outside and then the door opened-

"Get your hands off of me you spineless mongrel!"

James tensed. He tensed because he recognised that voice, it's a voice that he hasn't heard since that last day of graduation but he still recognised that voice.

Remus came bursting into the apartment, dragging Severus bloody Snape in along with him. James couldn't help but gape.

What the hell is happening?!

"Not until you see him." Remus hissed as he finally managed to drag the raven into the apartment and shut the door behind them.

Snape still looked more or less the same. Still skinny, still pale, his hair looked a bit different; actually cared for for one thing, a bit longer for another but those eyes-

"Moony! What the hell is this?!" James finally managed to get out and Snape seemed to freeze at the sound of his voice as well. Looking back towards the hazel eyed wizard, dark dark eyes fixed on him before narrowing in a disturbingly familiar glare. A glare that was somehow so much more intense since he last saw it, three years ago.

But just as quickly as it came, that look went. It seemed to vanish as Snape's gaze moved from James and swept over the room before landing on Sirius and then it changed.

It changed into something different, something James couldn't describe. It was different from the anger that James was used to seeing into those dark pools of cruelty and spite.

Something... odd.

"Remus!" James said again, instinctively pulling his wand out and aiming it at the raven, whose eyes went back to fix on him and that glare instantly returned before a sneer pulled over his lips. "What is he doing here?!"

"James, put that away." Remus responded, not moving away from the door even after letting go of Snape's arm; guarding it against the raven who looked very close to bolting the first second he got.

"But-"

"Severus." Sirius breathed and James couldn't help but look back at the animagus at the sound of their supposed mortal enemy's name coming from his mouth. Sirius looked shocked. His eyes were wide, hands hanging loosely at his sides, his skin... flushed. "You're here."

"Not by choice, you half brained twit." Snape glared at Sirius, rubbing the spot where Remus had been holding him as he was dragged inside. He paused and then scoffed. "You look like shit."

James expected anger at the insult, Merlin, he felt a bit of anger on Padfoot's behalf but then Sirius' face did this thing. It twisted, first in something close to anger and then briefly, very briefly amusement and then...

Nothing.

But his eyes, they darkened to a point that James had never seen before. Fixing solely on Snape, his hands clenched at his sides with the knuckles turning white and then-

"Get out."

No one in the room moved. Snape just kept glaring at Sirius.

"I said get out!"

James looked back at Snape and then Remus, "Moony why would you even-"

"He's talking to us."

"What-"

Remus rushed forward to grab the hand that James still had aimed at Snape and dragged him to the door.

"He means us."

"What-"

James was so confused. But Remus already had him out the door, grabbing his cloak on the way out. The last thing James saw before the door closed was Snape still glaring at Sirius and Sirius with that dark look in his eyes.

The door shut.

"Remus, what in Merlin's name-"

Remus looked back at him, those blue eyes filled with something that made the words die right on James' tongue. The hazel eyed wizard finally let his arm go lax and Remus let go.

"Remus, what's going on?"

The werewolf sighed before giving his friend an exhausted smile.

"Dragging the stubborn git here took a lot out of me. How about a drink?"

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

"They've been together since school?!"

James was gaping, Remus shook his head with a sigh.

"They're not together. I don't know how to describe what they were doing back then. I don't think either of them would be able to explain it if you asked." Remus took a sip from his glass and let out another sigh, "Trust me, I asked Padfoot once. He just stared at me, didn't say a bleeding word."

"But-but... since when?"

"I don't know. The first time I caught them together was after the holidays in sixth. Remember after Sirius left-" Remus made a vague gesture with his hand. James just nodded in understanding.

After Sirius left home and was disowned.

"I thought it was weird, that he was taking it all so well. He never even seemed upset about it, remember?" Remus scoffed, "Caught them in the astronomy tower. I didn't even understand what I was looking at at first. It looked like Sirius was trying to hurt him, plus Snape was screaming curses at him. Almost got nicked in the arm from the magic that was coming off of them. I thought Sirius was trying to hurt him at first."

James watched as Remus slowly turned red and he frowned, "He wasn't trying to hurt him?"

"I don't think so?" Remus sounded confused, "I just left once I realised that I was intruding on... whatever that was supposed to be. After that I noticed how happy he was. And every time something bad happened; he'd be in a mood for a few days and then he'd dissappear. I'd look on the map and see him with Snape behind the quidditch stands or in a bathroom somewhere; he'd come back and everything would be fine."

"Sirius has been shagging Snape... since sixth at least?"

Remus shrugged and James continued to gape, "Why didn't you tell me about this?!"

"I don't know, they seemed fine... or, not fine but the only people they were hurting was each other and even then it didn't seem like they were actually hurting each other. Besides, I didn't want you complicating an already complicated situation."

"What's that supposed to mean?"

Remus gave him a very bored look, "Be honest James, if I told you about what Padfoot was doing with Snape, you would've lost it and it would've turned into an even bigger mess than it already was or is...."

"Well, of course I would've lost it! I can't believe Sirius has been carrying on like this and with Snape of all people?!" James was close to screeching, a few of the people at the bar around them turned to look and Remus quickly hushed him.

"Calm down."

"I will not calm down! Sirius must be insane or maybe, maybe Snape was drugging him or something. Using somesort of potion to-"

"We haven't seen Severus Snape since graduation. Any potion he could have been using, would have worn off by now. If he was dosing Sirius then why did Padfoot tell us to leave earlier instead of Snape?"

"I'm still not sure I believe that." James huffed and Remus scoffed.

"Do you remember when Sirius' dad died? How weird he got for days, he kept picking fights with us to the point where he didn't go home with you for the Easter holidays?"

"Yeah?"

"But when we all came back after Easter, he was suddenly better? He even apologised to you James. You never wondered about that?"

"I-... I just thought that he needed some time to himself."

"It could've been that." Remus took another sip from his glass as he glanced up at his friend, "It also might've had something to do with the fact that Snape stayed at school for every holiday except for the summer. Including that Easter."

James was back to gaping and Remus shook his head, "Look, I don't understand it either James. But whatever it is that they were doing used to work for Sirius so I figured, with him being so bad now; maybe it'll work again."

James took in a deep breath when a thought suddenly came to mind, "What about... the incident with Moony? Were they still-"

"I think they stopped a while after that." Remus sighed, "Picked up again after-"

"After what?"

"Remember in seventh? Snape wasn't at school for a few days, Wormtail said he overheard some Slytherin saying his mum died. Not sure who Snape's mum was but apparently, it seemed like it was a big deal." Remus frowned, "The night he came back, Sirius snuck out, didn't come back till the next morning. I didn't even bother looking at the map then, I could guess where he was."

James shut his eyes and picked up his own glass to take a swig of whiskey before letting out a mostly satisfied gasp, "So that's where you were for three hours? How did you even know where he was?"

Remus shrugged, "One of the packs I spend the full moon with sometimes... a few months ago, I heard them talking about some brewer who was looking for werewolves willing to help him in his experiments. He was trying to improve on Damocles Belby's wolfsbane and he wanted test subjects to test it on."

James' eyes went wide, "Did you - you didn't..." he trailed off. Remus let out a sigh as he looked down at his glass.

"It's free wolfsbane James. Very few potionsmasters are willing to brew it it's so difficult to make and those that do always charge a fortune for it. I showed up where they said he was working, nearly had a bloody heart attack when I realised it was Snape. He wasn't all that thrilled about helping me either, but apparently he needed different test subjects to test the potion on, to check variables and what-not."

"What if it ended up being somesort of trick?! Snape hates us, what if he poisoned you-"

"Yes, well... clearly he didn't." Remus was still staring at his glass, "Honestly, the last few months have been such a relief. I haven't gotten any new scars, it doesn't hurt half as much as it did before and when I'm Moony... it's not Moony it's me." And then he sighed, "Merlin, he was so livid when I grabbed him this afternoon. I'll be lucky to even get a drop of wolfsbane next month."

"You think he'll stop making it for you?"

"His one condition in our arrangement; was that I don't breathe a word of this to either of you. I promised him I wouldn't tell you about him or what he was doing. So much for that."

"Moony-"

"It's... O.K, I was doing alright without the wolfsbane, I think I'll be fine again. Besides, Sirius needs this."

"If Snape even stayed. He looked ready to run when we were there earlier." James remarked and Remus scoffed.

"Trust me, he stayed. I don't even want to imagine the mess they're making right now."

James made a face, "Don't be gross Remus."

Remus laughed before looking over to his friend, "A word of advice, from someone that's been exposed to... that before. Don't go to Sirius', till morning at least. The way you are with Snape, something tells me that you'd be scarred for life."

And now, James stands in front of Sirius' front door.

Why?

Because despite Remus' testimony. He just couldn't believe it. The idea that Sirius was doing something like that with Snivellus?! No, it couldn't be real. Sirius hated Snape just as much as James did if not more. So it couldn't be real right?

Somewhere along the line, Remus must have gotten his wires crossed somehow.

There's no way Sirius and Snape have somesort of weird sexual arrangment going on. It's impossible.

So after leaving Remus at his apartment, he headed over to Sirius'. In his head, James reasoned that he wanted to check up on Padfoot. Make sure that Snape hadn't done anything to hurt his best friend or just make his already bad situation worse by virtue of it being Snivellus.

The door was locked, a quick alohamora fixed that. Not like Sirius would mind anyway. James grabbed the doorknob to open the door only to pause and frown when he was met with some resistance. Not like the door was still locked. No, it was like something was pushing back at the door, blocking it so it wouldn't open.

One more hard push and he finally got it open and stepped inside, only to gasp at the wave of magic that slapped him right in the face, almost knocking his glasses off and causing James to stumble back. He blinked in shock at what he saw.

Sirius and Snape were on the couch in the living room area. Sirius had Snape beneath him, one hand wrapped around the Slytherin's slender pale neck while the other grabbed at his clothes. There was that look that he'd never seen on Sirius' face before; this strange mixture of rage and frustration, complete and total utter loathing, drenched - practically drowning in the dark shadow of lust. His eyes looked pitch black, filled with an unhinged sort of madness that had James tensing tremendously.

And Snape?

One of Snape's hands was at Sirius' shoulders seeming to try and shove the other away as hard as he could, while the other practically clawed at the animagus' face. James could see angry red lines scratched into his skin, one of them bleeding a stream of red down Sirius' cheek. Those normally dark onyx eyes now somehow even darker, glaring with rage as he squirmed and struggled underneath the other. But more than that, was the magic that James could feel and almost see snapping across the room, knocking over objects all across the room and leaving sharp lashes against the suede material of Sirius' living room set. Their magic seemed to be at war, snapping apart and then lashing out at the nearest object. The room felt incredibly warm, almost sweltering to the point where James felt the urge to take off his cloak and outer robes.

Instead he just stood in the doorway, frozen. Somehow he finally understood what Remus was talking about earlier.

He didn't understand what was happening either.

Suddenly a loud rip.

Sirius grabbed a hold of Snape's shirt and ripped it open, a few buttons scattered over the floor and onto the coffee table as Snape screamed.

"Get your paws off of me, you disgusting-"

Snape was cut off when Sirius suddenly leaned down and forced a kiss on the Slytherin. His hand still locked tight around the raven's neck and not budging, seeming to try and force his tongue into Snape's mouth. Snape's hand went op to grab and pull at Sirius' hair. Padfoot just grabbed a hold of the hand and forced it back onto the couch.

Snape was still struggling, screaming into Sirius' mouth. James' eyes went wide.

This... This looks wrong. And not just because its Sirius with Snape.

Merlin he looks like he's actually trying to hurt Snape, it looks like he's trying to-

Another snap of magic hit a nearby lamp and had it shattering against the wall while the shade rolled across the floor.

Sirius suddenly pulled back, breathing hard he moved down lower and started undoing Snape's belt-

"You worthless mutt-"

"Shut up!"

This feels so... wrong.

Snape tried to buck up and away, twisting in the animagus' grasp so violently that James didn't even have to think about it before he had his wand out and aimed at Sirius. A blasting hex immediately sent him flying into the nearest wall.

Sirius let out a grunt as he hit the wall and a slight groan. James was breathing hard, staring at Sirius with wide eyes when he realised what he'd done but-

Has Sirius gone insane?! Was he actually going to try and... and to Snape?! James knows that Sirius hates the raven but that-that's going too far. What would've happened if James hadn't shown up? And then James remembered the incident at the shrieking shack again. He suddenly remembered how Padfoot didn't seem to know how to think straight whenever Snape was involved.

A low cough. James looked over to Snape and saw him sitting up on the couch, clutching his neck right over those angry red marks as he tried to catch his breath, with his shirt ripped and open. He went over to the Slytherin.

"Snape. Snape are you alrigh-" Before he could even try to lay a hand on the raven his hand was quickly slapped away and dark dark onyx eyes snapped up to glare at him.

"Don't touch me."

"I... I'm sorry, I don't know what came over-"

"I didn't ask for your help. Piss off." He hissed as he got up and walked around the couch, but instead of heading to the front door, Snape headed straight for the bedroom instead. James just stared after the other in confusion only to stop when he heard another groan. At the wall, Sirius was slowly dragging himself up to his feet. James couldn't help but glare.

"Padfoot! What in Circe's name do you think you're doing?!" Sirius looked up at him, James flinched when that same dark look from before was still in the animagus' eyes as he pushed himself up using the wall.

"James, get out."

"Sirius-"

"I SAID GET OUT!"

With that he turned and immediately headed down the hall to the bedroom. James quickly followed only to stop in his tracks when he saw Snape standing by the bed, seeming to try and do something about his shirt only for Sirius to come storming in. He grabbed the door and slammed it shut behind him, with so much force that the walls of the apartment shuddered and the door just swung open again.

Sirius grabbed a hold of Snape, who wrenched his arm free only to be grabbed all over again and dragged in for another forceful kiss. But this time, Snape only seemed to hesitate for a second before his arms suddenly wound themselves around Sirius' neck and he pulled himself even closer. An odd strangled moan reached James ears as Snape clutched back tightly at the animagus, who lifted him up to wrap the raven's legs around his waist before they both tumbled onto the bed.

James was frozen again. Confusion keeping him rooted to that spot when another rip came. This time it was Sirius' shirt, which was quickly shoved aside as the two started to almost maul each other's faces off as they roughly rutt against oneanother.

The kiss, if you could even really call it that looked painful, messy. It was all teeth and tongue. Snape's hands were clenched tigthly in Sirius' hair but Sirius didn't seem to care. He broke the kiss, his mouth almost immediately latching onto Snape's now exposed shoulder. Snape cried out. He could feel their magic snapping against the walls again, the heat in the apartment seemed to rise and that's about the time that James realised that he was flushed and breathing a bit hard himself. He took one step back and then another. Snape's back arched off the bed and his mouth fell open in a silent gasp, face flushed and eyes shut, lips bruised; James could see the bite mark bleeding streams of blood over the Slytherin's quickly flushing skin as Sirius moved down over his chest.

"Sirius."

Breathless, desperate.

James looked away just as Sirius finally managed to get Snape's belt off and bolted for the door. He shut it behind him with a slam and just stared at the vacant hallway before him as he tried to catch his breath. As his heart raced, thumping hard against his chest and he wondered what in the world that was.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

The next day, James met up with Remus. He didn't tell the werewolf about him showing up at Sirius' apartment the night before. Not when even he hadn't completely processed the situation yet himself. When he got home, Lily was already in bed and asleep. James was careful not to wake her even as he pressed a kiss on her temple and wondered yet again, what on earth was going on with Padfoot and Snape.

It seemed so violent, so angry so... passionate. There was no restraint, no control they just went at each like they were each trying to rip the other apart. Is that really what they've been doing since school? This weird angry hate sex thing. Is that really what's been helping Padfoot get a hold of himself this whole time?

James still couldn't understand it.

He was up for most of the night, only got a few hours of sleep before he woke in the morning and got ready to meet with Remus at the time that they agreed on.

That morning, Lily had leaned up to press a kiss on his lips just as he left. It was as soft and sweet as all their kisses were. And James reciprocated with the same careful touch that he always did. Lily's hand held on tightly onto his shoulder. He could just barely feel her fingers through his robes. She'd probably never claw and scratch at him like-

Something flashed in his mind just then. The image of Sirius forcing that bruising kiss on Snape and Snape finally returning it with the same violent urgency that he received himself. While Snape clutched back tightly at Sirius' hair like he was trying to rip it from its roots.

James quickly pulled back and gave her a soft smile as he promised to be back by dinner. He couldn't help but let his eyes drift down to her neck, creamy and pale and flawless. Unlike the angry red bruises Sirius left on Snape and yet... Snape still let Sirius-

They met up at Remus' with the werewolf making small talk before asking James to please behave himself and not start a fight, in the unlikely event that Snape is still in Sirius' apartment. James said nothing, though he wasn't sure he'd be able to look Snape in the eye let alone start a fight with him after what he saw the night before.

When they arrived at Sirius' door, James felt oddly nervous. Remus could immediately tell.

"Something wrong?"

"No... I mean, you mean besides the obvious right?"

Remus rolled his eyes, "Just don't freak out James, alright?"

"Alright." James said as he swallowed hard, grateful that he managed to dodge that question. Remus didn't bother knocking, because they never knocked when they went over to each other's houses; so why start now?

James internally groaned.

Remus opened the door, they stepped inside and were greeted by a sight that was not completely unlike the scene from last night. At the kitchen overlooking the rest of the living room area, Sirius had Snape pushed up against the counter, hands braced on either side of the Slytherin as they snogged in the kitchen. Snape's hands were around Sirius' neck, still clutching about as tightly as they were last night and the kiss itself was still all tongue and teeth, though without the violent urgency.

James felt himself flush. Remus quickly cleared his throat.

"Morning, Padfoot."

They pulled apart. Mostly due to Snape's jump before he shoved back at the animagus' shoulders. Sirius looked back at them and cleared his own throat as he pulled away.

"Morning."

James frowned.

There were more marks on Sirius. A busted bottom lip, there was a deep looking cut on his cheek below his left eye and then there were hickeys dotted on his neck. Snape seemed more or less the same as the night before. With the only excpetion being the way the bruises had darkened and how there was a new bite mark a bit higher on his neck, completely exposed in a shirt that very clearly did not belong to him. It looked about one size too big, with a muggle band logo on the front.

Snape took a deep breath and a look of flawless indifference immediatetly fell over his face. He simply pushed off the counter and made for the door when Sirius grabbed his arm again.

"You'll come over tonight, right?"

Snape just stared back at him for a tense moment before he pulled his arm free and stalked for the door.

"Morning Snape." Remus tried and Snape just stared back at him.

"Lupin." And then he paused, "I expect you on time next week."

Remus beamed, "Yeah, absolutely."

The raven made to walk passed when-

"Uh, Snape..." James started, not even sure what he wanted to say. It didn't seem to matter though. Snape glared and then roughly shoved passed him and into the hallway, completely ignoring the other.

James growled, "Nice shirt."

Snape stopped and looked back, "Piss off you bone headed twat." and then he left.

James glared after him before looking back at the animagus, "Really Padfoot?"

Sirius didn't answer the very obvious question there.

"What're you doing here so early?"

"Moody, remember? You're supposed to come in today."

Sirius' eyes widened and he dragged a hand through his hair, "Shit, just... give me ten minutes and I'll be right out."

With that he headed to the bedroom and Remus let out a soft sigh, "Well, that went much better than expected."

James frowned.

He was still frowning when Sirius came out of the bedroom fifteen minutes later, dressed and ready to go to work for the first time in ages. Even after they arrived in the ministry and James left him at the mercy of Moody. They'd both been relegated to desk duty; paperwork and such, so they didn't really get the chance to talk until lunch eventually came around and Padfoot came over to plop into the chair in front of his desk.

"Thank goodness it's lunch time, I'm starving. How about we go grab a bite?" He said with an exasperated sigh and a smile and James was suddenly struck by how normal the other suddenly was. Like the passed few weeks didn't happen. But the signs, unfortunately, were still there. The had scratches on his face. His lip though no longer swollen still had a very visible cut, along with his left cheek. Sirius didn't even bother finding a pair of robes that would more effectively hide the hickeys on his neck. James was still frowning.

"Sirius, what's going on between you and Snape?"

Sirius stared back at him for a moment, "Nothing."

"It didn't look like nothing last night, or this morning."

Sirius seemed to swallow but still didn't answer.

"Sirius-"

"Does it matter James?"

"Of course it does." James sighed, "Remus told me, that this has been going on since we were still in school."

Sirius rolled his eyes, "Bloody hell."

"If it's been going on for this long then-"

"Merlin, James, nothing is happening between me and Severus." Sirius said clearly even as he shifted a bit awkwardly in his seat, "Yes, fuck, we used to shag back in school sometimes and he stayed over last night but that doesn't mean that something is going on between us."

"You told him to come over tonight."

"So?"

"So? Sirius..." James sighed again, "If you... if you fancy Snape-"

"Fancy him?" Sirius scoffed. James let out a growl of frustration.

"Well if you don't fancy the git then why are you fucking him? Why is it, that Moony and I have been trying for weeks to get you to get your shit together but Snape manages to get your head on straight after one night?"

"What can I say? Snarky prat's a surprisingly good shag." Sirius said mockingly and James glared back at him.

"Can you be serious for one second?" The animagus opened his mouth and James stopped him, "No, don't even think about making that joke right now."

Sirius shook his head, "There's nothing going on between me and Severus. We just..." Then he looked over to the nearest window, "Back in school, this is just something we did sometimes to feel better about; things... feel better about everything, and now-"

"Now what?"

Sirius finally sighed and dragged a hand through his hair, "I don't know. I asked him to come over tonight because I just... I want to see him that's all."

"And then?"

"And then I don't know. Maybe something, maybe nothing. Who cares James?"

"I care."

"Why? Severus and I, we aren't hurting anyone-"

"Except for each other?" James asked, "Last night, it looked like you were trying to kill each other."

Sirius paused to stare at the hazel eyed wizard and then he suddenly smirked, eyes filled with mischief as he teased, "Don't judge us just because your sex life is the textbook definition of missionary."

James gave him a whithering glare. "Don't start."

"Seriously, I bet if you looked up vanilla in the dictionary, it has a picture of you and Lily right under it."

"Shut up." Sirius laughed and for a moment James couldn't help but laugh as well, "You're my best mate Sirius. I just want to make sure you know what you're doing."

"I don't." Sirius admitted, "But that's fine because right now, Severus and I aren't really doing anything. If that changes at some point then we'll all have something to worry about. But for now, it's just... fine."

James stared back at Sirius for a moment, taking in a deep breath before he asked, "You're sure you don't fancy Snape?"

Sirius took in a deep breath of his own and let it back out, "Yeah."

"Yeah?"

Sirius looked down at his hands, "I don't think fancy is the right way to describe the things I feel for Severus."

"How would you describe it?"

Sirius looked up at James and then looked away again, his hand went up to touch that cut on his lip just as those same lips pulled into a smile. "No idea. C'mon, let's go get lunch. I'm starving."

"Fine... since when do you call him Severus anyway?"

"Seventh." Sirius answered as they both got up to leave the office, "We were in the dungeons and at that point it just felt awkward calling him Snape while he was riding me on the floor so-"

"I don't need to know that!"

James felt slightly better after their talk, but only slightly better.

They went out, got some food and headed back to work. After work they met up with Moony and had one drink each before calling it a night, with Remus making them both promise that they'd get together for the weekend. They apparated back to Sirius' apartment, mostly out of habit. James had mostly forgotten about the Snape situation until they walked in and found the raven actually sitting on the couch like he'd been there for hours. He glared at James the way he usually did, James returned the favour.

"Potter."

"Snivellus." He spat, surprisingly all Snape did was roll his eyes. For his part Sirius didn't seem to care about the tension that still seemed to be brewing between him and Snape as he just tossed his cloak onto the coffee table.

"Goodnight Prongs."

James blinked as he stared at his friend, "What-"

"Lily's waiting for you right?" Sirius said giving him a very pointed look. The look that said.

'I'm throwing you out without actually telling you that I'm throwing you out so just take the bloody hint mate.'

He's gotten that look from Padfoot before whenever he was entertaining some new bird. It was something else though to get it because he had Snape sitting on his couch.

Snape suddenly looked tense on the couch. James scoffed.

"Yeah, 'Lily's' waiting for me."

Snape glared at the wall. It was petty, but felt like victory in James' mind.

This time Sirius rolled his eyes, James turned to leave the apartment. Much to his dismay, Sirius hadn't even waited until he'd fully left and shut the door before he suddenly flopped on the couch and dragged Snape onto his lap. Snape's hands were already on his clothes trying to pull them off as Sirius proceeded to try and maul his face off again. His hand went up to grip in Snape's hair, that same pitch black hair that they used to mock for being greasy and dirty back in school. The last thing he saw was Sirius pull at those pitch black locks hard and Snape gasp as his head was yanked back to expose that still bruised neck.

"Sirius."

He shut the door. Took a deep breath and just made his way home.

James decided to apparate at least part of the way before walking the rest. Just so he could clear his head after... everything.

He got home about thirty minutes later, found Lily reading and she greeted him with a kiss and a smile as always. He got changed before dinner and they talked as they ate. Lily told him about her day at work and he told her about his, making sure to omit the parts concerning Sirius and Snape since... well, they haven't really had any sort of discussion about Snape since they finished Hogwarts and... talking about him now would just upset her, so James decided to keep it to himself.

Besides, if this thing between Sirius and Snape ends up dissolving into nothing, like it probably will, then telling her about it would be pointless anyway.

After dinner though, she did ask about Sirius. James had been so concerned about him after all. Why wouldn't she ask?

"He's fine."

"Really?" Lily asked as she pulled back the sheets on the bed.

"Yeah." James shrugged setting a few of the extra pillows aside, "He even showed up for work today and everything."

"That's good. What changed?"

James didn't want to lie.

"He's talking to someone."

"Really? Who?"

James paused and then he lied, "Regulus, so..."

"Oh. I'm surprised those two finally managed to make up."

"They haven't made up exactly, they're just talking."

"Hmm." She hummed and then smiled as she walked around the bed and leaned up to press a kiss on his lips, wrapping her arms around his neck as she did, "Well, at least we'll get to spend some more time together."

James smiled back, though even he could feel it was strained. Lily's head gave a tilt.

"Something wrong?"

"No, nothing's wrong." He said as he kissed her back and she reciprocated so he kissed her again. He pushed forward a little more, pressed in a bit harder earning a breathless moan. Without even thinking about it, he let his left slide up to wrap around her neck, holding just tight enough to keep her still and he felt her pulse jump under her skin. His right hand went into her hair and-

"OW! James-" She yelped as she pulled back clutching at the back of her head as she blinked back at him in shock, "James, what was-"

"Nothing, sorry. I think I spaced out for a bit. Sorry."

Lily just stared back at him, "Spaced out-"

"I think I'll have a shower, before bed." He said quickly leaning in to press a quick kiss against her temple before making a beeline to the attached bathroom and shutting the door behind him, while Lily just stared after him in confusion.